proposal poll

[lala2332]

I am having the hardest time imagining how FF will propose. Until recently I never even thought about what my dream wedding would be or anything like that....so this is a new issue for me. I keep suggesting we go on a great trip somewhere so he has a good destination as the backdrop, but he keeps shooting down my plan for a trip. Our law school is in a blah town, so I really don''t want anything here. He says he has some ideas, but I''m honestly a little worried.

How would you want to be propsed to/how were you proposed to?

Anyway to drop some hints about what you would like?

 

[gwendolyn]

As long as he asks the magic words, who cares about the rest?

 

[absolut_blonde]

Date: 11/1/2008 4:12:12 PM
Author:lala2332
I am having the hardest time imagining how FF will propose. Until recently I never even thought about what my dream wedding would be or anything like that....so this is a new issue for me. I keep suggesting we go on a great trip somewhere so he has a good destination as the backdrop, but he keeps shooting down my plan for a trip. Our law school is in a blah town, so I really don't want anything here. He says he has some ideas, but I'm honestly a little worried.

How would you want to be propsed to/how were you proposed to?

Anyway to drop some hints about what you would like?

I think it's important to give him a lot of leeway re: the proposal. It's really important to some guys. And, they face a lot of pressure regarding the 'perfect proposal' because they know you'll be telling the story to tons of people for ages afterward.

That said, I make an exception to that for anything you'd genuinely dislike or be unhappy with. For example, I'm an extremely private person so the LAST thing I'd want would be a public proposal - my worst nightmare is one of those proposals on the big screen at a sporting event! It's important to me that he proposes when it's just the two of us because I will probably bawl my eyes out and I see it as a very intimate, private event.

So that's something we've discussed a bit in passing. But, SO knows me well enough at this point to know that even without being told. I am confident that whatever he does come up with will be perfect.


Basically... let him do it his way! He could come up with something wonderfully romantic that you'd never even think of. I mean, there's great potential for a romantic proposal even at home IMO.

 

[Amanda.Rx]

I want mine to be very intimate and private also- no family, no friends, no jumbotron, etc. etc. I would be perfectly happy if something as simple as dinner and a movie at home, and a diamond for dessert!

I don''t think the proposal has to be done in an extravagent place- some guys want that, though. Others don''t. Plus, if you know you''re planning a vacation, then you''ll be EXPECTING a proposal, and then you''ll be dissapointed if it doesn''t happen. I personally wouldn''t want to plan something with the intention of him proposing- I think it would take some of the fun out it! Let him be creative and surprise you!

Save the wedding for the extravagent place you want- those pictures will be better anyways!

 

[MrsHToBe]

Date: 11/1/2008 5:31:36 PM
Author: gwendolyn
As long as he asks the magic words, who cares about the rest?

Exactly.

 

[ash313]

Date: 11/1/2008 9:49:39 PM
Author: MrsHToBe

Date: 11/1/2008 5:31:36 PM

Author: gwendolyn

As long as he asks the magic words, who cares about the rest?

Exactly.

Gotta thritto this one!

 

[ckrickett]

I would love a morning proposal. Like something when I wake up. He is such a grump in the morning it would be a nice change then we could celebrate all day!

but I''m game for anything as long as it happens!

 

[Deelight]

Date: 11/1/2008 5:31:36 PM
Author: gwendolyn
As long as he asks the magic words, who cares about the rest?

Ditto , seriously the proposal is like his thing the wedding is more about the bride and after the asking most people will be gushing over you, this is his moment to shine.

Don''t stress about it and let him do his thing at the end of the day it is all about the question and answer not the setting.

 

[lala2332]

Date: 11/2/2008 3:22:42 AM
Author: Deelight

Date: 11/1/2008 5:31:36 PM
Author: gwendolyn
As long as he asks the magic words, who cares about the rest?

Ditto , seriously the proposal is like his thing the wedding is more about the bride and after the asking most people will be gushing over you, this is his moment to shine.

Don''t stress about it and let him do his thing at the end of the day it is all about the question and answer not the setting.

sorry....didn''t mean for it to sound like I would be unhappy with whatever he chooses. I guess that because i picked out the ring I just want him to take the proposal seriously b/c it is his moment to shine and I''m not sure he has seen it that way or even seriously thought about it.

 

[SailorsSweet<3]

I''m very excited to see what my SO comes up with, because I know he''s creative. I have no idea what he''s going to do so I cant really think of way''s I''d want him to propose, sorry if that sounds weird.. BUT if I were to propose to myself

haha

I''d want it to be

a) outside - not next to a pool on a random day in june, I''m talking romantic scenery on a mountain overlooking the ocean or a romantic location in a city somewhere

b) disguised - I wouldnt want to know it was going to happen, I''d like to be seriously convinced I was there to do something else or on my way to do something. I''m pretty oblivious so that shouldnt be hard

c) intimate - I wouldnt want a band to march by with the words "will you married me" spelled out on their uniforms, hehe

I think the most romantic thing would be a proposal whispered in my ear

 

[Deelight]

Date: 11/2/2008 9:58:24 AM
Author: lala2332

Date: 11/2/2008 3:22:42 AM

Author: Deelight

Date: 11/1/2008 5:31:36 PM

Author: gwendolyn

As long as he asks the magic words, who cares about the rest?

Ditto , seriously the proposal is like his thing the wedding is more about the bride and after the asking most people will be gushing over you, this is his moment to shine.


Don''t stress about it and let him do his thing at the end of the day it is all about the question and answer not the setting.

sorry....didn''t mean for it to sound like I would be unhappy with whatever he chooses. I guess that because i picked out the ring I just want him to take the proposal seriously b/c it is his moment to shine and I''m not sure he has seen it that way or even seriously thought about it.

No need to be sorry, if I came across a harsh sorry about that it was seriously not my intention. I get where your coming from but sometimes it is so easy to get caught up in the whirl of what should/could be that it can overwhelm you and him and take a little of the magic away. All I told my FI was you will know when the time is right and he did . I would say most guys (if not all) take proposing seriously and it is a big thing to them as much as it is to us. My FI was planning the proposal for 8 years, I had no idea he was planning it for that long - I only found out almost a month after he did the deed and that was through the grapevine.

You never know what those sneaky buggers could be up to

.

 

[PilsnPinkysMom]

I had some ''concerns'' about how it would happen, too... I think that''s normal to some extent. You want it to be special and memorable, after all!

I thought about my proposal over, and over, trying to figure out what FI may do and came up with all sorts of ''cute'' ideas. He ended up proposing after a bike ride/picnic at a nearby state park. I pretty much knew it was coming, but it wasn''t what *I* would have chosen for myself (or so I thought) BUT- after the fact- FI started telling me about his other ideas, etc, etc, etc.... And at some point he asked, "If you could go back in time, would you have changed any part of it?" and the honest-to-gosh answer is NO.

It was perfectly intimate, genuine, simple, sweet, and US. I loved it. Wouldn''t change it for the world. Plus, he couldn''t stand holding on to the ring any longer without proposing- so that nixed a holiday proposal... But that''s sort of cute in itself- knowing you FI was that excited about being engaged.

Perhaps it seems that he''s not putting much thought towards it, but I''m sure he is... Or at least when the time draws very near, he will. The other ladies are right in saying that "The Magic Words" make the moment- though the setting surely helps. Take comfort in knowing that if your FF loves you a lot, which I''m certain he does, he''ll want it to be a special, memorable day. He may go about it in a way different from what you anticipated, but your heart will swell when you realize that he really did take time to consider a perfect time/place.

And maybe it seems like he''s not ''planning'' because he really IS, and he''s just trying to keep you in the dark???

 

[Haven]

The proposal is HIS thing to worry about--don''t let it stress you because you probably won''t have any control over it!

My hubby came up with a proposal that was perfect for us. I really wanted it to be private rather than public. Also, I definitely didn''t want him to do anything that involved waking me up because I would personally find it very embarrassing to tell a proposal story that shared the fact that I slept over at his place (and I''d definitely have to modify the story for our future children . . . ) That''s just me, though.

This is how he actually proposed:
I came over to his place one afternoon and he was in his bedroom folding laundry. He called out from the bedroom that there was a stack of magazines to be recycled on a chair in the family room, and that I should look through them to make sure I didn''t want any before he took them out. When I got to the bottom of the stack there were three enormous wedding magazines, which I thought he bought for me because he knew I was excited about our impending engagement. Well, when I pulled them out I noticed that one mag had a silver bookmark curled around its binding. I looked at the bookmark and it had the words "Will you marry . . . " engraved on it.

The moment I read the bookmark hubby came out of his room with another magazine with another bookmark curled around the binding. This bookmark read "me", and it had my engagement ring dangling from it. He pulled the ring off, got down on one knee, and said the sweetest things ever.

The best part is that we I now have a bookmark to use that reminds me of our engagement. (I''m a literature fanatic, and a HS English teacher, so books mean a lot to me, which is what made the idea so special.)

 

[glitterazzi]

Date: 11/2/2008 12:31:25 AM
Author: ckrickett
I would love a morning proposal. Like something when I wake up. He is such a grump in the morning it would be a nice change then we could celebrate all day!

but I''m game for anything as long as it happens!

Part of me agrees with CKrickett here, but I''ve already ruined that for my FF. He told me his foiled plans... all of which I foiled! One was to put the ring on my finger while I slept and then get out of bed and make breakfast and wait for me to wake up and find the ring on my finger. Then I told him how lightly I sleep - and he realized he couldn''t get the ring on my finger without me waking up. Another was at Christmas with one of our families - but I told him I didn''t want it to be public because I''m going to ugly cry like a big baby and I don''t need the embarrassment of people watching (or the speculation of what they are thinking while I''m crying)!

My FF is using one of my BFF''s as his informant - he talks to her, she talks to me and takes the info back to him. She''s an author and one day asked me how I would start a book on proposal-wedding. I knew he was behind it, but I played along. Pretty much my answer is: It needs to be something special to the two of you. If football is your thing as a couple - work it into football. If running, or hiking, or travel, etc. work it into that. Personally - I think mine will be a romantic date on the Plaza - we do that once a month, and it''s casual and quiet, a weekday so it''s not crowded. That''s just my thought. I don''t know if its right, but I do know he has the whole thing planned out.

My advise... just mention to him things that you find romantic. slip them into everyday conversation so it doesn''t sound nagging. "OH - aren''t the mountains just so solemn and beautiful!" etc.

 

[Tuckins1]

It was our anniversary. We were in our bedroom getting ready for bed. He was kneeling next to the bed and I was sitting on it. The tv was on and I was in my scrubby pj''s. Not exactly the movie/story book proposal... But it''s mine! I did not care, I was just so happy. I love him so!!!!!

 

[vita*dolce]

i think about how my boyfriend will propose all the time.. i''ve imagined it a million different ways, and i''ve definitely also suggested taking a trip, but he won''t give me any hints so i guess only time will tell!!

i''ve heard that it''s all such a blur that you don''t really notice your surroundings anyway, as long as he asks you to marry him everything else will fall into place!!

 

[princesss]

I just want him to ask.

He''s told me he hates public proposals because he thinks it''s a very private moment meant to be shared between two people. I totally agree.

So when the time comes, I don''t care how he does it, I just love the thought that it''ll be a private, special moment between the two of us.

 

[CNYHopeful]

Good question.

I ran into an old friend of mine a few weeks ago with her husband and their baby daughter. We were catching up on life and she asked how SO and I were doing...if an e-ring were coming soon. She mentioned how it wasn''t until they were married that she came to a deeper appreciation for how difficult and stressful it was for her husband to plan the perfect proposal. It really made me think about how my expectations might add a ridiculous amount of pressure onto him (as if the act of making a proposal weren''t stressful enough)!

I know my SO has a plan and he''s been imagining different proposal ideas since early on in our relationship. He''s shared a couple of ideas with me that he ruled out and they were all really sweet. I have no clue exactly when it will be or how it will be, just that ("it''ll happen before the summer")

As for my ideal proposal here''s what I''d imagine:

A nice intimate setting, that has meaning for us as a couple (perhaps a special day, a special place, something significant for the two of us) and an original way that he shares his hopes, intentions for us as a married couple. It would be nice to share dinner afterwards with our parents (but that would be difficult since my parents live 3.5 hours away).

Regardless, when it''s from his heart, I don''t care how he does it or when, it''ll be sweet and lovely and I look forward to that day. We had a nice chat last night with his mom and she reassured me that he has a plan, that "it''s not going to be tomorrow and it won''t be at Christmas" and I ought not to worry about it or expect it, just to enjoy our time together before and when it happens. It is really good advice and I feel a lot more at peace knowing that she knows.

 

[jcarlylew82]

Date: 11/1/2008 5:31:36 PM
Author: gwendolyn
As long as he asks the magic words, who cares about the rest?

ditto!

 

[Dreamgirl]

I would like to be proposed to in private where we can have our own moment with nobody else really around. Something extremely romantic would be ideal.

(I often tell him I LOVE romance. So.........)

I''ve told him before that I don''t care for proposals in restaurants (with the ring in the food deal) I myself find that cheezy and cliche but some people like that. And that is totally fine!!! (It''s still a sweet gesture, it''s just not me) The other night I was changing channels on the tv while FF was on the computer (in the same room) and on TLC this guy is in a restaurant at a booth with his girl and gets up out of the booth, pulls her out of the booth and proposes. FF was watching and I said "Aw man! I wouldn''t like that, look at those other people right near them!" (This is how I drop hints)

Anyway, who knows what he will actually do. In the end, what I really want (all I really want) is for him to get down on one knee and just ask me!!!!!!!

Chances are he will do it in a more private setting anyhow because he can tend to be a private person. And I don''t see him doing it with people around because he wouldn''t want everyone looking at us during that private moment. I don''t ever picture him doing it with family around. So I think it will all end in a way we both want!

 

[megster84]

I love thinking about all the different ways SO could propose. It is a happy daydream I have after lunch time at work every now and again...along with ring daydreams, wedding daydreams..etc. Anywho, I have given my SO guidelines similar to the other ladies...no public proposals, no family proposals, no valetines day (I am not a big v-day fan). I actually told him the less intricate the better. I don''t really care when where or what we are doing, it will be great no matter what. Although, the daydream that occurs frequently is us on the beach on Cape Cod (where we spend a lot of time) and just a simple ''Will you marry me?'' oh I get goosebumps just thinking about it.

My BIL proposed to my sister like 5 minutes after he asked my Dad. He told her while she is was in her pjs housesitting next door that he couldn''t wait another day to start the rest of their lives together...I think that is pretty romantic.

 

[DiamondsforDee]

I told my FI as long as the proposal was private and "us" I would be happy.

Well he spent months thinking up all of these elaborate schemes, all of which (luckily) fell through for some reason or another. He finally realized that he was getting away from "us" with all to these plans and sat down and came up with the most perfect proprosal for me. The best part was: 1) it was private, 2) it was "us", and 3) it was free!

You can give some basic parameters, like I did, but I think at the end of the day you just need to let him figure it out. The right proprosal will happen if you let him do his own thing. It may not be what you imagined, but that doesn''t mean it won''t be better than you imagined. GL!

 

[emeraldlover1]

I did not give my fiance any suggestions and I am so glad I did cause it was perfect!!!!

 

[ringless]

Honestly, in all reality, it doesn''t matter.. I would be elated to be asked! I have mentioned in another post I would love to be proposed to in a hot air balloon, or somewhere on a vacation/romantic getaway.