<3 setting, and an introduction

[Mico]

Hello ladies,
I didn't know where else to put this, but as I anxiously await an email I had to do something with my time for fear of going crazy.

I met my boyfriend almost 2 years ago, we are both in the medical profession and met during the initial intern orientation at our respective hospital. He remembers our first encounter... down to what I was wearing. Long story short, we became very close towards the end of our intern year and officially started dating roughly a year ago. He is the most amazing person I have ever met. I have had a streak of bad luck with SO's and this man made me forget that anyone else existed. He is funny, compassionate, has a heart of gold and I honestly believe he loves and would never hurt me - which is something I've never felt before.

He apparently started saving up for a ring early in out relationship. Due to the high cost of our schooling and our loan repayments combined with our very low resident salaries this has been a slow process. I was apparently shown prospective rings on three different occasions in dec and jan, which i very bluntly told him were ugly and continued on my way not knowing they were meant for me - i cringe when i think about it. Since then I was let in on his little secret with firm instructions to find out what I wanted... this lead me to pricescope .

Unfortunately, with my browsing, I have fallen in love with an estate piece that is out of our budget. When first found I immediately sent him the piece as an example of what I wanted, and would check in on it almost daily to see if it was sold. I suppose he saw the browser history and eventually (last night) he told me that he had been trying to save, and with some borrowed money we could make an offer on my dream ring!!!

I'm both excited and scared. I don't want to offend the seller with an offer that is too low, but it's the maximum that we can give and I would kick myself if we didn't try and the ring slipped away from us.

So here I am. Sitting here, staring at an email offer to a seller I feel like I know but who doesn't know me, hoping that some time in the next week I might be told I can have my dream ring, after already finding my dream man. I can't breath.

p.s. add me to the list, please?

 

[Enerchi]

Best of luck on the (potential) purchase! I hope you get it! Maybe that seller would be open to a negotiated price if they knew the story? Whatever happens with the ring - good luck in your relationship. So glad you have found the right person!

 

[Mico]

*sigh* I sent a novel as our offer, and told them I wasn't going to play the bidding game and gave them our max offer. We honestly can't go higher, I made it clear in the email and said if they didn't accept the offer to keep us in mind in case they adjusted the price in the future.

As for my boyfriend, thank you. I had given up on love before him. I honestly thought it would be safer not to love anyone and just get hitched when it was... necessary. I didn't think men like him still existed, and I didn't want to get hurt again... ever. Don't get me wrong he has his flawsm but they're so insignificant compared to the things my friends complain about their SO's that if I actually saw them as flaws I would be nit-picking. Actually, I lie, one flaw = he's stubborn - but usually flexible when he sees something is important to me (like the ring - which isn't really important, more like an obsession).

I do see some stories on this forum, however, that remind me of ex relationships. I stop myself from posting RUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!, and I see others that are adorable and remind me of my relationship. I'm glad I found this part of PS .

 

[Mico]

An update, no dream ring for me. The seller declined my offer, and I nicely asked them to consider me in the future if they ever decided to consider lower offers.

I told the boyfriend maybe it was a sign that I wasn't meant to be involved and that he should go back to looking for a ring himself and he looked at me horrified that I would even consider letting him pick one out on his own. The traditional part of me wants to be surprised with something he picked out, and the other half of me wants to go crazy looking at more settings (actually that side is still bummed and doesn't feel like looking at settings for awhile.) He pretty much knows down to the specifics what I've been looking at recently anyway. Does anyone else go through these conflicting emotions of the traditional vs perfectionist?

 

[LibbyLA]

You're the one who's going to be wearing it so it's in your best interest to help him choose something you'll love. Just consider it self-defense .

liz

 

[madelise]

Welcome

Tip for haggling: never let the seller know that you want it that badly! If they feel you want it badly enough to offer more, they'll decline. If you sort of nonchalantly offer a lower price, they might cave if they feel it's their "only chance".

The things I learn from my old Chinese grandmother that came in very handy for me while haggling in Chinatown!



If you're fighting the urge to help so that you can be surprised, why not choose the diamond together, and have him work on the setting? That way you prevent any risks of having a poorly cut diamond, or an event where he's ripped$$ off$$, which happens often with guys buying girl-things! Then give him the diamond, and hand over any reigns.. for him to do the rest! That way you won't know what setting he chose, and you won't know when it's done, so you'll still get to be surprised! (The perfectionist in me would NEVER let my SO buy a diamond, LOL!) And even if he does do the worst job possible, which he won't since he knows all your preferences already, the setting is only a loss of a few hundred to a few thousand? And you can always change it in a few years?

Or you can even build him a bookmarks portfolio of all the different settings you like. He could choose one of those, or make one incorporating his favorites of them? Either way, it'd be an ultimate surprise!


Heck, even if you chose your own setting, and your own diamond, it's still a huge surprise when it's set!

 

[Mico]

Welcome

Tip for haggling: never let the seller know that you want it that badly! If they feel you want it badly enough to offer more, they'll decline. If you sort of nonchalantly offer a lower price, they might cave if they feel it's their "only chance".

The things I learn from my old Chinese grandmother that came in very handy for me while haggling in Chinatown!

Whoops, well I didn't do that very well. I figured open and honest was the best approach - max offer, no haggle, a little bit of story too. They did respond to my "keep me in mind" email saying they would help me in the transaction if I increased my offer by a couple thousand (to their original price), but unfortunately we can't.

People say my field of study will eventually pay off... after we pay back our loans - maybe we can afford the ring when I'm 40 (I'm 29 now).

Anyhoo - I'm not anticipating a proposal until likely summer, plenty of time to obsess over new rings ( ). We oddly already have wedding type plans made (is that weird without a ring?), but haven't done anything such as putting deposits and such due to our ring saving.

Or you can even build him a bookmarks portfolio of all the different settings you like. He could choose one of those, or make one incorporating his favorites of them?

HA! I've made a pinterest for his viewing pleasure. Every time he looks at it he laughs at me because the styles keep changing... don't judge me.

Just consider it self-defense .

<~~ lol, done and done.

I guess I'll keep you all updated? Still sad about not getting the ring, but it really shouldn't matter that much should it? I would probably be just as happy with something that costs half as much (even the ugly ones he originally pointed out ).

Oh, and thanks for all the welcomes, I like it here

 

[madelise]

What are you in school for, if you don't mind me asking?

You can very well post a link to your "dream ring", and we can tell you if it's worth the asking price, and possibly find you alternatives in the Rocky Talky section. Some of the veterans here are AMAZING.

And no, you're not crazy to have wedding plans already! Originally, SO and I were planning to have a wedding LAST winter! I had been scoping through plenty of venues, and visiting their event spaces. Luckily, I'm not addicted to Pinterest, YET, and am trying to avoid it, as I don't need anymore distractions from schoolwork, as PS and FB are enough!

Speaking from experience, and an overwhelmed and pretty much sick-of-it SO that doesn't even want to think about rings anymore, don't overwhelm him with 0981209812 pinterest pins! If your own taste is still ever changing, don't hand over the bookmarks yet. Fine tune it a tad more until you're sure of certain aspects, i.e. shape of diamond, color and clarity "limits", then solitaire/halo/3stone?, and work from there. I must have changed my own mind 10x since I first started choosing. But the good thing is, settings aren't permanent and you can change it when your taste changes again in a few years

I'm glad you like it here. LIW seems to have picked up a little bit in the last few days, which I'm LOVING. I swear for a while there, I was watching tumbleweeds blow through here!

 

[pandabee]

welcome!! what a lovely story and sad that you couldn't get the estate ring you wanted. perhaps you would be able to find a similar setting or have it custom made? i know what you mean though about obsessing about a ring...DBF is lucky he doesn't have access to my pinterest boards or he would probably run!!! (haha just kidding ) but at the same time part of me also wishes to have a nice ring and wouldn't mind waiting if it took him that long to save. I agree with what madelise said about posting a link to your estate ring and getting other opinions on whether it is a good price. good luck with your residency and the ring search!!!

 

[LoveLikeCrazy]

Or you can even build him a bookmarks portfolio of all the different settings you like. He could choose one of those, or make one incorporating his favorites of them?

HA! I've made a pinterest for his viewing pleasure. Every time he looks at it he laughs at me because the styles keep changing... don't judge me.

Hi and welcome! I'm new here too Pinterest is an awesome idea which is easy to navigate & have everything in one place. I like the bookmark idea too because then its directly linked to prices and where he can buy it. (interest shows the website though I'm assuming if you pin a pic??)

I've changed my mind a couple times too. I think this just reinforces to your SO that you should be the master of your own fate...haha. And come on we are girls, and can be indecisive when it comes to bright shiny objects....even more so when its something you hopefully wear forever!

 

[Mico]

sorry for the late reply, work has been a little more demanding lately.

I've been lurking on PS for some time - so I think our offer was fair, the piece was something I really wanted. After our price wasn't taken SO and I looked at other options and found we could buy something similar if we wanted for around the same price we had offered. I also researched the jeweler and am now hesitant about the jeweler's work (PS vendor with a lot of feed back). I was also pleasantly surprised when SO was showing me we didn't lose out on the deal by sending me links to other settings i liked at prices closer to our budget. We also found a couple diamonds cheaper retail than the estate piece had offered - so all is not lost .

The pinterest is ever evolving. When something is ruled out I delete it (i know, OCD). It's good that work has been busy lately to keep my mind off things and now that I know he understands what I really want handing over the reins might not be such a bad thing . I believe there are about 5-6 different settings with different views i've pinned there.

After all this, I told him it was stupid to get so attached to something that wasn't mine and i would be happy with anything. We technically have a date, he's apparently spoken to my family already, and the sparkly is just a formality (but needed as calling him anything other than my boyfriend without a ring feels weird.)

I'm in limbo, but will keep you updated
xx

 

[pandabee]

aww thanks for keeping us updated! I'm glad things are starting to fall into place, and I hope the sparkly comes soon!!

 

[madelise]

i know, OCD

hey, OCD gets what OCD wants!!

After all this, I told him it was stupid to get so attached to something that wasn't mine and i would be happy with anything.

I feel you on that! I get so excited and attached to anything and everything I see that's sparkly! Heck, I was joking around this past weekend with friends that I stalk eBay for goodies and don't even BID.. bookmark them and keep checking up on them.. and get heartbroken when it's sold!

 

[Mico]

I feel you on that! I get so excited and attached to anything and everything I see that's sparkly! Heck, I was joking around this past weekend with friends that I stalk eBay for goodies and don't even BID.. bookmark them and keep checking up on them.. and get heartbroken when it's sold!

HAHAHA!!! I know the feeling!!!

 

[audball]

So!!? Did anything come of this?

 

[LibbyLA]

I feel you on that! I get so excited and attached to anything and everything I see that's sparkly! Heck, I was joking around this past weekend with friends that I stalk eBay for goodies and don't even BID.. bookmark them and keep checking up on them.. and get heartbroken when it's sold!

HAHAHA!!! I know the feeling!!!

Ditto, although I don't necessarily feel the heartbreak. I do have a lot of things on my watch list, though.

liz

 

[Mico]

So!!? Did anything come of this?

haha, no. I took a break from looking and in passing found some pictures on my phone from when we went ring shopping. I seem to love things that we can't get. A stark contrast to the estate ring is a piece like the roberto coin c profile solitaire. Hideous online, BEAUTIFUL in person. Maybe I'll upload the pictures I took later - just got home in time to sleep and wake up early for my shift tomorrow. whooppie!

Maybe I'll post a topic in rocky talking seeing what the experts think about that ring's durability in the hospital setting. A quick pricescope search lead me to a poster telling a story about their diamond falling out!!!????!!! gah. i'm never going to find a setting.

 

[audball]

So!!? Did anything come of this?

haha, no. I took a break from looking and in passing found some pictures on my phone from when we went ring shopping. I seem to love things that we can't get. A stark contrast to the estate ring is a piece like the roberto coin c profile solitaire. Hideous online, BEAUTIFUL in person. Maybe I'll upload the pictures I took later - just got home in time to sleep and wake up early for my shift tomorrow. whooppie!

Maybe I'll post a topic in rocky talking seeing what the experts think about that ring's durability in the hospital setting. A quick pricescope search lead me to a poster telling a story about their diamond falling out!!!????!!! gah. i'm never going to find a setting.

Aww, I'm sorry!

Please do post photos! Maybe we can help you 'shop'! RockyTalky is a good place for advice. Does your job require you to be in and out of gloves a lot? If so, most would recommend a very low setting, preferably a bezel so the prongs don't get caught on your gloves.

I wouldn't worry too much about the stone falling out. If your setting is well made and you maintain it by having it checked twice a year for loose prongs, it's not super likely to happen. Not impossible, but not super likely.

 

[madelise]

A bezel sounds like a great idea! You don't have to do just a plain bezel solitaire, you can do bezel + other designs. Halo outside the bezel?

I remember when a doctor in the ER lost her diamond at work.. It was so scary! It was rather large, too! Thank god one of the nurses found it a few days later, hiding in some nook or cranny..

A lot of my old coworkers, nurses that had to constantly glove-on, glove-off, are still able to wear their bling though-- and some have some substantially sized bling! The good thing is your left hand doesn't take too much of a beating (unless you're a leftie!)

 

[audball]

The people I know who have to wear gloves for work on and off wish they'd gone with plainer settings since powdered gloves gunk up their bling and pave so much that they usually just opt not to wear it...so sad!

 

[Mico]

A bezel sounds like a great idea! You don't have to do just a plain bezel solitaire, you can do bezel + other designs. Halo outside the bezel?

I remember when a doctor in the ER lost her diamond at work.. It was so scary! It was rather large, too! Thank god one of the nurses found it a few days later, hiding in some nook or cranny..

AHHHH!!!! reading this gave me nightmares

I want to update this post with the settings i like buuuuut... i'm too lazy, maybe i'll link them? I don't feel like downloading and uploading. I wish i could just share my pinterest but people on the forum frown upon sharing your real identity and it's connected to my facebook. *sigh*

 

[audball]

A bezel sounds like a great idea! You don't have to do just a plain bezel solitaire, you can do bezel + other designs. Halo outside the bezel?

I remember when a doctor in the ER lost her diamond at work.. It was so scary! It was rather large, too! Thank god one of the nurses found it a few days later, hiding in some nook or cranny..

AHHHH!!!! reading this gave me nightmares

I want to update this post with the settings i like buuuuut... i'm too lazy, maybe i'll link them? I don't feel like downloading and uploading. I wish i could just share my pinterest but people on the forum frown upon sharing your real identity and it's connected to my facebook. *sigh*

LINKS! Links! Links! Links!

 

[Mico]

youuu asked for it, here's one i came across today - actually. It's everything I know I shouldn't want, and i even did a search to see what it would actually look like on a hand buuuuuuuut:

http://www.victorcanera.com/jewelry/engagement-rings/the-gabriella-four-prong-solitaire-with-single-cuts.html

with attention to the video in the lower right hand corner of the picture

others include:

crown type setting
http://jewelsbyericagrace.smugmug.com/JbEGSignatureSettingsandSpecia/Plain-and-Pave-Solitaires/The-Julia-Euro-Solitaire/17010152_mw4Dgr#!i=1287233661&k=TmqrKXN

may expose too much diamond
http://www.mervisdiamond.com/ritani-1rz1066ff-engagement-ring.html

prettier on my hand, i have photos of this one on i can upload later
http://store.jrdunn.com/product-p/rc001019p65h6125.htm

this is pretty from the top, don't like the sides though - unfortunately
http://jewelsbyericagrace.smugmug.com/JbEGSignatureSettingsandSpecia/Plain-and-Pave-Solitaires/The-Rose-Solitaire-Featuring-a/16811221_DWkKGF#!i=1268539607&k=DtxTXSP

and finally, how i feel like searching for a setting:
http://media-cache6.pinterest.com/upload/177821885257135734_fowQnkRF_f.jpg

thoughts? i wish i could find actual pictures of the first one and see what it looks like on.

 

[madelise]

and finally, how i feel like searching for a setting:
http://media-cache6.pinterest.com/upload/177821885257135734_fowQnkRF_f.jpg

That one's funny!! Haha, I think I'm stealing that photo to send to SO. Captioned, "I'm buying myself THIS if you misbehave!"



Do you glove-on/glove-off? If so, nay to the first one.

Keep in mind, anything JbEG you might want, the last day for orders to be in is May 31st! They're no longer making settings!

 

[madelise]

OOps forgot to add I <3 the Julia setting the most.

 

[Mico]

Do you glove-on/glove-off? If so, nay to the first one.

we use more hand gel/hand washing in my hospital vs. gloving (but that's still used with certain situations). That's why I'm still kinda considering that one. I've also been looking around at other residents and some have pave/channel type settings.

 

[audball]

youuu asked for it, here's one i came across today - actually. It's everything I know I shouldn't want, and i even did a search to see what it would actually look like on a hand buuuuuuuut:

http://www.victorcanera.com/jewelry/engagement-rings/the-gabriella-four-prong-solitaire-with-single-cuts.html

with attention to the video in the lower right hand corner of the picture

others include:

crown type setting
http://jewelsbyericagrace.smugmug.com/JbEGSignatureSettingsandSpecia/Plain-and-Pave-Solitaires/The-Julia-Euro-Solitaire/17010152_mw4Dgr#!i=1287233661&k=TmqrKXN

may expose too much diamond
http://www.mervisdiamond.com/ritani-1rz1066ff-engagement-ring.html

prettier on my hand, i have photos of this one on i can upload later
http://store.jrdunn.com/product-p/rc001019p65h6125.htm

this is pretty from the top, don't like the sides though - unfortunately
http://jewelsbyericagrace.smugmug.com/JbEGSignatureSettingsandSpecia/Plain-and-Pave-Solitaires/The-Rose-Solitaire-Featuring-a/16811221_DWkKGF#!i=1268539607&k=DtxTXSP

and finally, how i feel like searching for a setting:
http://media-cache6.pinterest.com/upload/177821885257135734_fowQnkRF_f.jpg

thoughts? i wish i could find actual pictures of the first one and see what it looks like on.

It's not my style and I'm not sure that it would be good for the glove/work situation, but I love the Victor Canera one anyway!! I also love the one from Mervis Diamond one! Totally my style. The setting I chose (a Sholdt) is similar. Have you looked at their settings?

http://www.sholdtdesigns.com

 

[Mico]

ooooh! they have pretty designs!

the boy and i decided on the victor canera one - finally. I just need to decide if i want a 4 prong or a 6 prong. They say 6 is safer, and i like it because it makes the diamond more round... however the 4 shows more diamond and looks beautiful in the video. i've tried searching for the setting to see real hand shots, but have come up with nothing.

Also, looks like the wedding band wouldn't sit flush - so i need to brain storm on that one.

more research for me! yay

 

[madelise]

I think it looks better with 4. Can you make it with 4 prongs, but do the double claws? I think that's safer than 4 by itself since it's wider? Like this: http://www.victorcanera.com/jewelry/engagement-rings/the-trueste-solitaire-with-antique-cushion.html or this: http://www.victorcanera.com/jewelry...rench-cut-solitaire-with-round-brilliant.html? You can ask Victor on his opinion of what'll be safer. I'm so happy you chose your setting! And are choosing VC!



I just want to say that the hand sanitizing gel (depending on what formula) gets the pave gross looking too, though. One of my old supervisors just washed her hands all the time because of it. In fact it gets any diamond gross looking. I just always wash my hands in hot water : )

 

[madelise]

Have you called VC yet? Don't worry about it not sitting flush. Tell him about that. He can tweak it so that your WB can sit flush. BUT REMEMBER TO BUY A SPACER! You don't want that pave setting to get ruined