You''re telling me. Not to mention food etc.Date: 9/15/2008 1:56:53 PM
Author: Linda W
OMG!!!!! Harriet, that is outrageous!!!!!!!!!!!
That would be a way better weekend.Date: 9/15/2008 2:08:08 PM
Author: Maisie
Poor Harriet. It would probably work out cheaper to get a last minute flight and come visit me for the weekend!! Just think, we could spend all day in M&S looking at the cakes and biscuits. Now thats a worthwhile weekend!
I have to thritto Dfan, and ditto Eva, on everything.Date: 9/15/2008 12:13:57 PM
Author: Eva17
Date: 9/14/2008 11:31:41 PM
Author: diamondfan
I would go with the flow here. Maybe you cannot see the gem guy this time. Do it another time, you have some flex in your schedule and I would not tack that on to this as it will only serve to annoy you as the plans are not firm. Just know they are not being considerate but rise above it. Pack a few things, climate is similar enough to pack for either place, and then just go and have a smile on your face. Plan another trip with your hubby later on and do the things you want to do. Remember when I told you not to expect them to be reasonable? Exhibit A. And if you balk and resist it, you are the one who will get frustrated, and fight with your hubby. They could not care less about inconveniencing you. Your hubby should be dealing with them. As he thinks this weekend is not about what you want and is about them, I would just drop it at this point. I also like things planned out, but oh well, if they wait too long and you cannot get a reservation somewhere, guess you cannot go? Risk they have to accept if they cannot be firm.
Harriet, in the scheme of it, you need to let go. You hopefully have a long marriage to this man and they are a part of it. I personally would not want to let them be the cause of fights over such petty stuff. Save your big guns and ammo for the real issues, things to you really have to fight for. This is not one of them. Resign yourself, smile, imagine them in the loony bin, do what you have to, but you will not do well to already letting them cause strife. I did not learn this for a long time. Now I only tell hubby when it is a major thing, and I know he supports me in those times because I am not getting upset over all the other things.
I have to go with DiamondFan on this one. word for word
plus sometimes when we dread something (especailly when every detail isn''t planned) we have a better time than we ever thought we would
after 22 years i also have a few dreadful stops in the history books that we had to go to,( to see the family), and it is something we tell jokes about now. remember when we, OMG, blah blah blah....
Oh Harriet, I feel for you, especially because I am going through my own MIL hell right now and she only just arrived.Date: 9/15/2008 8:35:20 AM
Author: Harriet
ILs are not good for one''s mental health, are they?
Great. The ''getaway'' is going to cost about $1,000.
The other half finally pinned them down. We''ll be going to the Berkshires afterall.Date: 9/15/2008 2:51:39 PM
Author: Linda W
I know my hubby would not do that for one night, but that is the way he is.
Do you know where you are staying yet?? Or is that a bad question to ask??
I know, I know.Date: 9/15/2008 2:54:24 PM
Author: Ellen
I have to thritto Dfan, and ditto Eva, on everything.
I know how you like to have all your i''s dotted and t''s crossed, I used to too. But I''m tellin ya, if you''d just ''move down the alphabet'' a bit, things would go/be so much better!
I''m sorry. Do you want to vent? Go ahead if you do.Date: 9/15/2008 2:59:29 PM
Author: BizouMom
Oh Harriet, I feel for you, especially because I am going through my own MIL hell right now and she only just arrived.
I'm not. We went to the Berkshires once. Because we're such city dwellers, we almost continued driving to Boston. I do want to meet the gem expert, but not necessarily in the Berkshires. Meeting him would be making the best of a bad situation.Date: 9/15/2008 3:01:24 PM
Author: Linda W
I gather you are happy with that choice (I hope)
Harriet...seriously, there are a LOT of great cultural things to do in the Berkshires and it is BEAUTIFUL this time of year. Just because it''s not the city doesn''t mean it isn''t a great place to visit and relax...I can think of about a million places that would rank far far lower than the berkshires for a vacation!Date: 9/15/2008 3:09:00 PM
Author: Harriet
I''m not. We went to the Berkshires once. Because we''re such city dwellers, we almost continued driving to Boston. I do want to meet the gem expert, but not necessarily in the Berkshires. Meeting him would be making the best of a bad situation.Date: 9/15/2008 3:01:24 PM
Author: Linda W
I gather you are happy with that choice (I hope)
Thank you, dear.
Ditto. Listen to the wise Miss Skippy.Date: 9/15/2008 5:57:59 PM
Author: Skippy123
I think when life gives you lemons make lemonade (take a deep breath) and by just seeing the silver lining really makes life less stressful in the end!!!! I agree w/the others, you can laugh about the absurdity of their behavior all later. Honestly, if you think about it, they are going to own a B&B soon so how often will you have to see them?? Once they do that for a living it will be really hard for them to get away and see you all. I would just earn some brownie points because this is really about doing it for your hubby''s sake and that is what marriage is about, some sacrifices from time to time
Hi neatfreak,Date: 9/15/2008 3:14:47 PM
Author: neatfreak
Harriet...seriously, there are a LOT of great cultural things to do in the Berkshires and it is BEAUTIFUL this time of year. Just because it''s not the city doesn''t mean it isn''t a great place to visit and relax...I can think of about a million places that would rank far far lower than the berkshires for a vacation!
I''m listening and agreeing, dear ladies.Date: 9/15/2008 6:04:22 PM
Author: Kaleigh
Ditto. Listen to the wise Miss Skippy.Date: 9/15/2008 5:57:59 PM
Author: Skippy123
I think when life gives you lemons make lemonade (take a deep breath) and by just seeing the silver lining really makes life less stressful in the end!!!! I agree w/the others, you can laugh about the absurdity of their behavior all later. Honestly, if you think about it, they are going to own a B&B soon so how often will you have to see them?? Once they do that for a living it will be really hard for them to get away and see you all. I would just earn some brownie points because this is really about doing it for your hubby''s sake and that is what marriage is about, some sacrifices from time to time
Date: 9/15/2008 1:54:39 PM
Author: Harriet
No. Early Saturday. So all that expense is just for one freaking night.
Find a way to find something in them that you like. Your life will be richer for it, your marriage happier for it.Date: 9/15/2008 11:15:40 PM
Author: diamondseeker2006
I''m chiming in really late on this thread, but I think the reason some of us have been married 20-30+ years is that we have followed the very good advice given on this thread! We can come here to vent, but it is always best not to vent to the spouse about his family. They may even know the complaints are true, but they don''t want to hear it.
I figure if Caroline has survived her MIL, anyone can!