Door Knob has something funny to share...it is a whopper! Hope you are strapped in!

[door knob solitaire]

For those of you that know my story...skip to next paragraph...those who don''t know, before I found PS I ventured into the mall with my simple plain yellow gold setting known to all my friends as the door knob. I have had since 1996 and was heading to a remount event...to have it remounted. The traveling roadie crooks sold me a warped crooked chopped cathedral setting. Got home noticed it...went back had it dismounted they wanted $400 to put the door knob back in the old setting. Argghh!! I don''t think so you crooks!! So I decided to apply the $400 to a new mounting...that was April of 2004. (Still loose) 2007.

Fast forward to today...or should say last week. I got via email a quote from the Master Leon Mege to create my special solitaire setting for my lovely little patient stone. Contacted the appraiser and insurance company, scheduled to take it in the next day. So I asked hub bub...aka Mr. Door Knob to retrieve my special go to meetin loose stone (door knob) from our secret hiddie hole that we put all things valuable. He came back and said there is no ring in the hiddie hole. I said, Oh silly, you aren''t looking for a ring or a ring box...remember 2 years ago when the storm was approaching and the tornado sirens were sounding and the radio said the whirly gigger was a mile from us...heading our way...you asked me if I needed to secure anything? I retrieved my loose diamond and handed it to you in the diamond paper thingy and placed in in a white envelope? Well, he said, I remember the whirly gigger and I remember you handing me the knob...but that is all I remember.

OK this is where this post gets funny. It is actually a good argument to be the absolute funniest most outlandish unbelievable post I have yet to make...are you ready for the funny part?

We have surmised that since Mr. Door Knob, Aka Hub Bub, aka mud...didn''t know that the knob was in the large white envelope, because as he admitted...he can''t remember...we therefore postulate...

AGAIN FUNNY ALERT WARNING!!!! This is where you need to double check you seat belt!

Again, we have surmised he probably held it up to the light and when he saw nothing of importance such a document...he deemed it ...are you ready for this...he deemed it Refuse. Trash. Rubbish. And therefore discarded of the large white envelope as it was taking up valuable air space in the special hiddie hole. You still with me? Or are you rolling on the floor in laughter? Oh door knob stop!!! I am laughing so hard my ribs are hurting!! Oh man...I am with you on this. It really is the funniest post I have come up with. I could not have written any better material.

I will be authoring my email to Leon tonight. It is the most difficult thing I will have done since my PS membership. He won''t believe it. We have spoken numerous times over these years...he couldn''t believe I had finally decided on the ring. Now I have to tell him...the stone was tossed out with the coffee grinds, orange peels and tofu packages.

So, I am not sure if I should end my PS existence and retire my screen-name...as I am not a Door Knob any longer. Not even a drawer pull. I am nobody. I must confess, I may not have been DKS most of the 2000 posts I have nearly made. It has all been a hoax. A scam. I have defrauded you. Made a mockery of this community coming in here with a false identity. Whoa is me. But funny!!! Ha Ha Ha I am going down laughing!

Your pathetic pal

....formally known as DKS

 

[TravelingGal]

Holy sh*t!!!

DKS, before I say anything else, PLEASE tell me that thing was insured!!

 

[TravelingGal]

And I have to say...door knob or not, you are still one of Pricescope''s brightest gems, so you''ll always be DKS to me.

 

[door knob solitaire]

Tgal...the answer is NO.

and thanks for your support...now excuse me I have to go stick my head in the oven.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 11/20/2007 12:47:38 AM
Author: door knob solitaire
Tgal...the answer is NO.

and thanks for your support...now excuse me I have to go stick my head in the oven.

Take your husband with you.

 

[Kaleigh]

You are a beacon of light and humor on PS!!! Stone or no stone. But please can we find the stone?? When did the trash go out, where is the dump?? I''m not giving up hope here.

 

[Selkie]

Wow. Just...wow. Sooo sorry, DKS. Does homeowner''s insurance cover something like that? Probably not if they hear that story, huh? Maybe you could tell them the twister actually did strike your house, but only that one teeny tiny hidey-hole, and you didn''t realize it for 2 years? Eeesh.

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 11/20/2007 1:28:04 AM
Author: Selkie
Wow. Just...wow. Sooo sorry, DKS. Does homeowner''s insurance cover something like that? Probably not if they hear that story, huh? Maybe you could tell them the twister actually did strike your house, but only that one teeny tiny hidey-hole, and you didn''t realize it for 2 years? Eeesh.

Gosh I missed the part about the twister, was frantic reading I guess.

 

[Elmorton]

I''m so sorry, DKS. My mouth is still hanging open. No way is this the punchline - joke isn''t over until that baby is found in the house somewhere.

 

[movie zombie]

oh, my.....what a long and twisted tale.......!

a real lesson to the rest of us: when the twirly thing [or for those of us in california, the earth shaking thing] happen, do not...and i repeat....do not hand our treasure, our precious, our namesake to our dearly beloved other half.

movie zombie

 

[Love in Bloom]

I am shocked.
I am stunned.
Most of all, I am really sorry DKS! I would say you are the funniest poster on PS and I am really sad that such a tragedy has befallen such a sparkling gal.

BTW, do you think Mr. DKS would be in some sick way withholding the stone in an attempt, albeit a cruel one, to surprise you with a setting

?

 

[Circe]

OH, this is *awful* - I''m fairly absent-minded myself, and I freak out when things go missing, or appear to. Is there any chance whatsoever that it may have been put in the ubiquitous "very safe place"? In times of stress, I know I''ll absentmindedly store important things away and only find them when I start to ponder what my definition of "a very safe place" might have been at the time: could your hubby, similarly, have stuck this important envelope on some shelf or in some bag without thinking about just *what*, exactly, was in this envelope that you told him was so important?

SO MUCH SYMPATHY.

 

[Neveah]

Oh. NO!!! I am so, so sorry. That is awful. Is there ANY way at all, that it''s ANY where else??? There''s a saint you can pray to, Saint Anthony (I''m not Catholic but I''ve given it a whirl before) who is the Saint of missing things..... couldn''t hurt!!!
BTW, my Aunt lost her diamond out of her ring one day. She was devistated. She just knew it was gone and had NO idea where in the day it could have fallen out. She made me pray to Saint Anthony and later my Uncle BIT INTO THE DIAMOND WHILE EATING LASAGNA! I''m not kidding. It wasn''t chipped (and he didn''t swallow it!) That is a TRUE STORY so stranger things have happened. GOOD LUCK!

 

[LadyAmythyst69]

Oh dear lord!

I don''t know what else to say....maybe this is a good opportunity to upgrade? Maybe while the hubbs hopefully still feels guilty?

 

[bee*]

Oh wow-I was waiting for the bit that said that you found it. You''ll always be DKS to me though!

 

[sera]

Oh my gosh!

That''s horrible!!!

So, it was lost 2 years ago?! Oh man! Have you looked everywhere?! Because maybe it fell out of the envelope and maybe is stuck between papers in the hidie hole or around it or something?!

Wow... I''m so sorry!

 

[rockzilla]

Tragic - that''s just....Tragic =(

 

[Maisie]

DKS.... I read your post and all the while I was thinking ''any minute now it will be found and all will be well''....

I am just stunned. You must be feeling awful. I can''t think of anything to say that will make you feel better. I wish I could buy you a new diamond

 

[decodelighted]

I have seen too many Disney movies ... but is it *possible* that the Door Knob, when you didn't visit it for your & the Knob's 10th anniversary (not so much as a peek or peak) that it might have, out of heartbreak, grown spindly little sparkly legs and ran away in search of its own new setting?

Probably not. SIGH.

It's a sad story that illustrates the different types of focus different people put on things. For some folks, focus on the stone would have meant insuring it to the hilt & glancing at it a million times a day. For others, focus means years spent pursing the ideal setting & not settling for less. (You're certainly not the only one around here!!

)

I'd venture to guess from all your stories & your wonderful outlook that your TRUE focus is on your relationships. Which is more important than any material thing ... as, of course, you'd agree. Give "Mud" a hug & some puppy dog eyes. He's a man who wants you to have a Door Knob. Maybe he'll strike again!

 

[Deelight]

OMG

I have nothing else to say

I am hoping it turns up SOMEWHERE in your house.

 

[Independent Gal]

Oh. My. Heavens.

DKS! I don't even know what to say.

It WILL turn up! It HAS to turn up! It must! It must! It must!

 

[justjulia]

I don''t post too often these days (crazy schedule, exhausted, yada yada), but I read this and had to reply. My heart goes out to you!!! If he doesn''t remember exactly throwing it out, maybe it is still in the hiding area--under something? It''s just GOT to be somewhere.

 

[Hudson_Hawk]

OMG, I hope you find it. And if you don''t I hope Mr. Mud upgrades you to a dinner plate soltaire!

My heart goes out to you DKS.

 

[ang3199]

OH. MY. GOSH.

I''m speechless and horrified at the same time. I would be horrified if my little baby went missing, let along a door knob. I feel awful for you and like Maisie, I wish I could buy you another diamond. I would if I could.

I''m sorry. It is weird that I feel as though someone has died...

Your poor stone.

 

[Ellen]

Oh DK, I don't know what to say......



Except, your hubby is in DEEP doodoo. I shall be sending him a pair of waders, until such time that he has redeemed himself (aka, bought you a newer, bigger door knob), then, he can throw those out.

Seriously, my heart goes out to you. I can only imagine how you must feel. {{{hugs}}}

<-------- To Mr. Doodoo, I mean, Door knob.

 

[mrssalvo]

oh goodness doorknob. i was reading along hoping for the rainbow at the end of the story, something like you sent your stone off to be set, not that it was thrown out i the trash

. I can only imagine how you''re feeling. You are and will always be doorknob around here though and we hope you''ll stick around stone or no stone, ring or no ring. you might at least check with your home owners insurance company to see if they would cover any of the loss, it''d be better than nothing and having to start completely over. I know my homeowners will cover up to 5K without a rider so that would at least be 5K to put toward a new doorknob.

 

[chrono]

DKS (You are always DKS to me here),
I would be alternatively mad and amused at the same time. I''m so sorry about what happened. The only way Mr. DKS can redeem himself now is to get you a larger door knob to offset what he did to the original door knob.

 

[Lorelei]

Date: 11/20/2007 8:44:40 AM
Author: Chrono
DKS (You are always DKS to me here),
I would be alternatively mad and amused at the same time. I''m so sorry about what happened. The only way Mr. DKS can redeem himself now is to get you a larger door knob to offset what he did to the original door knob.

I couldn''t agree more!

I very sorry....

 

[MoonWater]

Wow. That is SUCH a guy thing!!! Unbelievable! So sorry!! Of course now that I know the store, I love your user name...fraud or not.

 

[susi]

DKS, I''m so sorry.....and doubly so because I did the same thing last year and have yet to find my diamond brooch. I hid it in a safe place when we went traveling, instead of taking it to the bank.

*sigh* still no sign of it.....

Don''t give up......only this morning I was going thru my closet yet again thinking I might somehow someway come upon it.

Again, I''m sorry....