- Joined
- Jul 25, 2008
- Messages
- 3,988
HollyS|1335459321|3181474 said:"I wouldn't cheat on him - that's definitely a trust issue, but you could ask him if he'd be okay with consensual extramarital sex."
Really? THIS is what you consider good advice? How ridiculously selfish is that thought? "Well, I need what I need, and I'll just get it from someone else, then." Another prime example of life being all about . . . "ME"?
Maybe people need to stop creating their own vows and stick with the "forsaking all others". Just so it might give you pause, anyway.
There is a plethora of reasons why taking intimacy outside your established relationship (married or not) is the very worst thing you could ever do. I won't list them here; they should be extremely obvious.
You want good advice, OP? Get busy helping yourself over this. Yes, that IS what I mean. When you're done, go enjoy your husband and your marriage. Contentment and happiness is not dependent upon the number of orgasms you have. But if you screw up a perfectly good marriage to someone you love, just how happy will you be?
That is pretty judgmental. If "forsaking all others" is crucial to you, then good. It works for you. However, other people may have different opinions and ideas. Good for them.
Just as seeking intimacy outside the marriage has its risks, having an extremely frustrated partner also has its risks, which I think would also be pretty obvious. There is a pretty strong link between contentment and happiness and sexual satisfaction. Not the number of orgasm, as you so elegantly put it, but in being satisfied with their sex lives. Which the OP obviously isn't.
A couple's sex life depends on both of them. You are placing the entire problem and all the solution on the OP's lap. Doesn't her husband have a part in it as well? I think so. They are a couple and both should be working towards the other's happiness. Right now, he is screwing (or not screwing is perhaps more apt) his marriage as well, by ignoring her needs. From the OP's description, it is not a perfectly good marriage, but one with a very serious flaw which she is trying to address.
I don't find saying "get over it" good advice at all. I think it is terrible advice.