The Official TTC Thread!

[janinegirly]

thanks drk--actually i am on FF (fertility friend) and have been learning more by the day. just sometimes it''s nice to hear actual experiences from ladies who''ve been doing this a lot longer.

has anyone paid for FF VIP--is it worth it?

 

[ChargerGrrl]

I haven't paid for the VIP portion of FF, so can't help you there.

I do tend to refer more to my copy of TCOYF than visiting FF, as it has so many case studies, scenarios, etc... I highly recommend picking one up on amazon.com

 

[lovelylulu]

okay. i have been trying to keep this to myself. but. the. waiting. is. killing. me.


my husband and i got married in july ''06 and our official TTC date was sometime in the spring/summer of ''08. However, I''ve been off the pill for a little while and had been keeping track of things for about two months. Long story short, it was right after getting home from a great thanksgiving with friends and family and my husband''s 30th birthday so we BD, I believe the day before I ovulated, and the next morning he hopped on a flight to Alaska for a business trip. We are both ready to start a family and the TTC date reflects the time we both feel would be the "best" time financially and professionally to begin trying. But that night, we decided to just see what happens. a whatever will be will be sort of a thing.

it''s been 10 days since that time and I am just absolutely dying to know. I realize that the likelihood is very, very slim seeing that this was literally a one shot thing, but hey you never know.

I also don''t want to breathe a word of this to anyone. not my family or my friends. and that has been much harder than i thought it would be. i feel like i''m walking around with this great big "maybe" secret.

I''ve been reading that I can take a home test as early as tommorow, but that it''s better to wait.

 

[janinegirly]

hi there,

when you say 10 days past, do you mean past due for AF or 10 days since BD/possible ovulation, that would mean you''re still expecting AF. (I can''t BELEIVE I know all thes acronyms now). So sit tight and wait till it''s past due at least a few days (not sure how long though) before testing would be my guess. It''s a bit soon now in my opinion...
do you temp? if you do, and your temps stay up after AF is due, I believe that''s a good indicator too.

i often wonder what the chances are of a "one shot" successful TTC. Reading some boards, it seems one needs to BD every day/other day to up the chances. but then you hear these stories of just random one shot success (without even knowing their cycles!)! i had a friend who met a guy..was careless and boom, success after a one night stand!! she was embarrassed, but turned out they tried to make it work and now are married and on #3 (it''s a real life "knocked up" story!)

good luck and keep us posted!!

 

[lili]

Date: 12/5/2007 1:28:28 PM
Author: lovelylulu
it''s been 10 days since that time and I am just absolutely dying to know. I realize that the likelihood is very, very slim seeing that this was literally a one shot thing, but hey you never know.

Lovelylulu,
Good luck and lots of baby dust to you.
I know the wait is killing you, but personally I''d wait until my AF is late (which typically is around 14 days or so) before testing.
Your hCG level may not be high enough if you test too early.
I wouldn''t be surprised if your one shot thing is it.
I know there are a few ladies in the pregnancy board who are

 

[curlygirl]

lulu, I'm so excited for you!!! One shot deals do happen--ask TravelingGal!!!!! I don't think you should test yet until AF is at least a day late. You may be disappointed if you test too early and it comes back negative so as hard as it is, try to wait the full 2 weeks and see if you're late before testing.

janinegirly, I actually did pay for VIP membership on FF. I liked it a lot because it gave a lot more analysis, info on when to BD and the ability to look at other people's charts. I also enjoyed the community boards. It was a great place to go and obsess with other people who are going through the same thing, although some people really went overboard. They all post photos of their HPTs and question each and every twinge to try to determine if it's a symptom. I got quite a few laughs but I also learned a lot, especially about gender swaying, just by reading the boards. I actually didn't even contribute to the boards until I got pregnant and then I started to post with other girls who were due at the same time. We now have our own board of May 2007 moms because we got sick of the FF rules--they won't let you exchange email addresses even in PMs and they were militant about stupid stuff and started booting people off so we started our own board. But it is a good place to chart and get information. I use the free charting tools now even though I'm not ttc again yet, I just need a place to keep track of my cycles. Plus, I like to go back and look at my pregnant chart!! Yes, I'm a dork!

 

[curlygirl]

OK, just to help you all out, here is my chart for the month I got pregnant. This also shows how to BD to make a girl! Haha, I don't know if it's true but it worked for me!! I also took supplements to change the pH of my CM. Notice that I kept testing for a month after because I just didn't believe it and I didn't want to stop temping but it was just scaring me so I did, which I recommend to everyone after you get your BFP. Lose the thermometer!!

 

[blushingbride]

Date: 12/5/2007 1:28:28 PM
Author: lovelylulu
okay. i have been trying to keep this to myself. but. the. waiting. is. killing. me.


my husband and i got married in july ''06 and our official TTC date was sometime in the spring/summer of ''08. However, I''ve been off the pill for a little while and had been keeping track of things for about two months. Long story short, it was right after getting home from a great thanksgiving with friends and family and my husband''s 30th birthday so we BD, I believe the day before I ovulated, and the next morning he hopped on a flight to Alaska for a business trip. We are both ready to start a family and the TTC date reflects the time we both feel would be the ''best'' time financially and professionally to begin trying. But that night, we decided to just see what happens. a whatever will be will be sort of a thing.

it''s been 10 days since that time and I am just absolutely dying to know. I realize that the likelihood is very, very slim seeing that this was literally a one shot thing, but hey you never know.

I also don''t want to breathe a word of this to anyone. not my family or my friends. and that has been much harder than i thought it would be. i feel like i''m walking around with this great big ''maybe'' secret.

I''ve been reading that I can take a home test as early as tommorow, but that it''s better to wait.

OMG - that''s awesome! I always think about doing something like that instead of waiting until our target date which BTW is the same as yours. I''ll be anxious to hear what happens!!! Sening PS Baby Vibes your way!!!

 

[blushingbride]

Date: 12/5/2007 3:17:21 PM
Author: curlygirl
OK, just to help you all out, here is my chart for the month I got pregnant. This also shows how to BD to make a girl! Haha, I don''t know if it''s true but it worked for me!! I also took supplements to change the pH of my CM. Notice that I kept testing for a month after because I just didn''t believe it and I didn''t want to stop temping but it was just scaring me so I did, which I recommend to everyone after you get your BFP. Lose the thermometer!!

Hi Curlygirl - can you explain why you took supplements to change the pH of your CM? Did you do this for a girl? Sorry, I''m so clueless with all this!

 

[blushingbride]

Also, the day with the line going through it was the day before you ovluated? Oh and I noticed that you didn''t BD on the day you ovaluted. Am I reading this correctly?

 

[janinegirly]

thanks curly..very interesting and, gosh i hope no one notices these crazy charts up on my screen at work !

looks like you bd''d a lot the week prior to O and took a break on O day, but then BD''d day after. i hear every other day BD is fine as well. hope so. not sure we''d be able to keep up! haha. also kinda don''t want to make it seem like work if that makes any sense.

you know i orig said we weren''t ttc, but seems like i''ve got the bug. need to find some other hobby so i don''t b/come obsessed with FF and charts!

 

[curlygirl]

Date: 12/5/2007 4:06:15 PM
Author: blushingbride

Date: 12/5/2007 3:17:21 PM
Author: curlygirl
OK, just to help you all out, here is my chart for the month I got pregnant. This also shows how to BD to make a girl! Haha, I don''t know if it''s true but it worked for me!! I also took supplements to change the pH of my CM. Notice that I kept testing for a month after because I just didn''t believe it and I didn''t want to stop temping but it was just scaring me so I did, which I recommend to everyone after you get your BFP. Lose the thermometer!!

Hi Curlygirl - can you explain why you took supplements to change the pH of your CM? Did you do this for a girl? Sorry, I''m so clueless with all this!

bb, I was trying for a girl although the real goal was just to get pregnant but I figured adding in some girl swaying techniques wouldn''t hurt! So all the research that I did on the FF boards said that you should try to change the pH of your CM. I can''t remember if you''re making it more acidic or more alkaline but I basically ate a lot of dairy and took cranberry pills and calcium/magnesium supplements. I can''t remember all the reasons behind doing these things but it worked.

And yes, you are reading my chart correctly. One of the other tips for girl swaying is to start BD early and do it all the way through ovulation. I had wanted to do it the day of O but DH passed out and I was sure our chances were over. We did it the next night anyway just for good measure. I guess it all worked!!! I''m one of those people who just tries everything at once and hopefully something sticks!

 

[curlygirl]

Date: 12/5/2007 4:09:23 PM
Author: janinegirly
thanks curly..very interesting and, gosh i hope no one notices these crazy charts up on my screen at work !

looks like you bd''d a lot the week prior to O and took a break on O day, but then BD''d day after. i hear every other day BD is fine as well. hope so. not sure we''d be able to keep up! haha. also kinda don''t want to make it seem like work if that makes any sense.

you know i orig said we weren''t ttc, but seems like i''ve got the bug. need to find some other hobby so i don''t b/come obsessed with FF and charts!

janine, we were trying for a girl, hence all the BD. They say every other day is fine but I was just hedging my bets and trying to follow the gender swaying techniques I had heard about. It definitely does seem like work but the key is to not let DH know what you''re up to.

He knew we were "trying" that month but he didn''t understand the complexity of it! He had no idea I was temping or charting. And it is really important to make it fun, not just babymaking. It''s not easy but you have to find ways!! We got lucky because we were actually at my inlaws'' country house over the weekend that I''m sure we conceived and sleeping in a room right next door to DH''s parents so it was like breaking the rules at the parents'' house!!! You do what you gotta do!

 

[E B]

Hello ladies!

Here I am, at CD 27, waiting for CD 1 so we can start our first cycle of trying! I'm so excited (and terrified!).

Also, thank you for sharing your chart with us, Curly! It looks like you did what we'll be doing this month, which is BDing every day from the 10th to the 17th (or 18th, just to be extra careful). OPKs haven't worked for me yet, so we're going to cover our bases. I'm going to check CM and possibly temp, but otherwise, we're just going to do a lot of BDing. TMI, but my husband is so excited for that part.

Good luck to everyone else TTC!

 

[snlee]

lovelylulu, I know the waiting is torture. It really helps to keep yourself busy so you don't have time to think about it. I would definitely wait to test until you are a day or two late. I'm currently in my 2WW of cycle #2. This cycle, I've been tying to not get my hopes up. I keep thinking that AF will come so the disappointment is not as bad. Although it is possibly for it to happen in one shot, I would try not to get your hopes up to high. Lots of baby dust to you! Hang in there!

Lots of baby dust to you EBree! How exciting that you'll be trying this month!

I'm glad to see more of you TTC now. It's nice to have the company and support here! Like lovelylulu, we've been trying not to tell friends and family that we're trying and it's been hard. I really want to get pregnant and surprise everyone with the news! I hope it happens soon. I should be able to test in less than a week is AF doesn't show up.

 

[lovelylulu]

Thanks for the advice to wait until at least AF is a little bit late.

Our fingers are crossed and apparently will stay that way for the next few days.

And curly and janinegirly, i do know that some of our very own psers have had their own "one time" success. mentally i keep going back and forth from thinking one minute i bet i''m pregnant to the next minute when i''m like there''s no way it happened.

i''m not temping, so i''ll just wait it out.

thanks for the baby dust!!

and ebree i''m sending piles of it your way

 

[lovelylulu]

snlee,

i had been reading your posts and i''ll send you piles of baby dust too

my hopes aren''t too high. i''m fairly realistic and it''ll be really suprising to see a positive line. but at the same time, it''s difficult not to let the mind wander...


We don''t want to share that we''re trying, because:
1) my older brother''s first baby is due on December 20th and they have been married for 12 years and i just want their little baby to have all the baby spotlight!! he''s a long time coming

2) my mother is ABSOLUTELY crazy. i think that we were married for about 8 minutes before the not so subtle baby comments, suggestions, etc. started. i think that i have previously mentioned that she gave us a knit cap for a baby last, last labor day. she is quite something. i just want to tell her after the fact and not get her hopes up

3) i am pretty much friends with people who are not planning on having children or not planning on having them anytime soon. all working professionals that love their lives without kids. i totally respect that choice, but in so many conversations it seems that they don''t really respect the choice of those having babies. it''s a rather odd situation and i think a lot of it stems from animosity at they way they are treated by other women, their families, society in general based on their choice not to have kids, and a lot of it is because they feel that women that take the time/resources to get educated and then get knocked up are likely to leave the work force/take maternity leave, etc. yada yadda yada. i''m sure that i be suprised and perhaps a lot of these people will be supportive, but i''m just not feeling like confiding yet.

 

[E B]

Thank you for the baby dust, snlee and lulu! Tons of it back at'cha.

We aren't telling anyone either. DH's parents know we're trying soon, but as for now, nobody knows. They'll all know when I'm pregnant, but I'd rather not receive any judgment/pressure to wait while we're trying, because all it will do is stress me out. Which isn't good for baby-making.

Last night, I caught DH looking at "baby books for fathers" online. I almost awwwww-ed him out of his chair!

 

[snlee]

Thanks for the baby dust ladies!

lulu, that''s really thoughtful of you to allow your brother to have the baby spotlight! I hope you get your time soon. The majority of our friends are unmarried and aren''t thinking about having babies anytime soon so I don''t feel like confiding either. They just aren''t at the same place in their lives as us, which is fine. I''m so glad to have this forum!

EBree, awww that''s so sweet that your DH is looking at baby books for fathers. My DH talks about babies almost daily and it''s really nice but sometimes it is difficult when I''m trying not to think about it!

 

[janinegirly]

can''t wait to hear the updates lulu, so exciting!!

and thanks curly for all the info. The part i find overwhelming with all the TTC boards is there is so much analysis and debate on timing of BD and what might work best to increase chances. Or not so much debate but sharing of various theories which are really only theories as far as I can tell at least! It can get confusing! Sometimes I wonder how people had things happen so naturally and haphazardly in the "old days" especially after I''ve too many stats!

 

[blushingbride]

Thanks Curlygirl for the info - I love how honest and detailed you are in your posts. You are very informative!

Ebree - best of luck to you this month! How exciting!!???

Our plan is still to wait until beginning of the summer of ''08. We are planning a trip to Italy and Croatia this summer and I think my DH would be thrilled if we conceived in Croatia (where he''s originally from).

Oh! I got my 2nd AF yesterday (this my 2nd one since coming off BC) so, looks like my cycles are becoming pretty regular again! My cycle this time was 33 days.

It was so funny though because I happened to have my annual exam yesterday morning and I told my gyno that I was late getting my AF, etc. She said sometimes it takes 6 months to get back on track so, who knows when I was going to get it and then low and behold - I get it yesterday afternoon!

 

[lovelylulu]

Hi ladies,

I think that I may have jinxed myself with my "true confessions from a TCCer" post yesterday afternoon. For it seems, that i'm having a bit of a pre-AF, which is totally in keeping with what normally happens for me. Obviously, I'm still going to hold out hope that proper AF might not come, but my hopes are a bit dashed. It's looking like our bun-to-be is going to have to be more than a one-shot wonder. And while this comes as no big suprise, it still leaving me feeling deflated.

the next big question, then, is do we keep up the "whatever will be will be" attitude or do we postpone trying until the spring/summer? I'm really not sure? For some crazy reason, I feel like I do NOT want to have a newborn in the winter. it just seems like we'd be housebound and go a little loony, but then the more practical part of me realizes that there is NOTHING you can plan about these things and regardless of when we start trying, we might not actually conceive until months down the road. effectively throwing the best laid plans out the window.

what to do. what to do. what to do.

oh and as luck would have it DH is going out of town on another business trip for at least part of my december "window"

bah.

 

[snlee]

blushingbride, that would really be cool to conceive in Croatia! That's good news about your cycles becoming regular and you're lucky that your cycles are on the shorter side. More chances of conceiving when you do try!

lulu, can you elaborate? What do you mean pre-AF? Light spotting? Sore boobs and achiness? I wouldn't rule out being pregnant just yet. If it's PMS symptoms you're experiencing, I've read that pregnancy symptoms are very similar...so you never know! Don't be sad yet. If it doesn't happen this cycle, we're all here for you. I know it can be really disappointing. I'm sorry to hear that your DH will be traveling during most of your Dec window. The decision whether or not to continue to TTC has to be made by you and your DH. I say do whatever feels right...you'll know. There are a couple months that my DH and I want to avoid too but when you start TTC, it seems silly to avoid months. If we need to, we'll decide what to do when the time comes.

 

[lovelylulu]

snlee: i can elaborate a bit, but it just feels so weird/embarrassing using the word spotting on the web

. Typical in my normal cycle, i have a bit of pre-AF spotting and I can always count on a blemish or two

. That is exactly what started yesterday and it continuing today. I''m definitely going to wait and see, but I''m feeling like we''re going to have to try again. which isn''t the worst thing in the world

but it inevitably plants a little seed of doubt. the "what if we can''t get pregnant" seed. i know that i can''t get too nervous after a one time attempt, but it still lurks in that back of a near 30 year old''s mind.

on another more positive note, i love hearing about your cute and supportive husbands. my DH can''t wait to be a father and just knowing how much it means to him makes me feel a little giddy inside.

 

[snlee]

lulu, don''t feel weird about using the word spotting...there''s no TMI on this thread. Could it be implantation bleeding? It happened at 11 and 12 DPO so it may be just your AF. When is your AF due? I know what you mean about the worrying about infertility. I hate the disappointment and worrying that something might be wrong with us.

It is really bugging me that pregnancy symptoms can be the same as AF symptoms. Yesterday I stated having AF like cramps. They were so bad that I swore my AF was showing up early but nothing. Today isn''t as bad but still achy. It could just mean that AF is almost here. I keep telling myself that AF will be here soon but I can''t help to think there may be a possibility I''m pregnant. I just want to know now! The last couple of days of waiting seem to drag on for forever!

 

[somethingshiny]

I don''t post here often, but I have been keeping up with you all. Just wanted to stop by and spread some fairy dust upon all those TTC, and those TTC in the near future!

Good Luck and Think Positive!!

 

[anchor31]

FI and I are not planning to be TTC for a couple of years, but I got myself a copy of TCOYF today because we would like to use FAM (plus mecanic back-up) as a BC method once we''re married.

And I really wanted to say... OMG. Thank you so much for recommending it. I''m a bio major, for crying out loud, and there''s tons of stuff in there I didn''t know. Stuff that every woman should know. I can''t understand how it is that in 2007 we are still living in ignorance and myths about facts of life that are so basic!! I used to think my CM was such an icky thing (

), but now I feel like it''s something completed natural that I can use to know what''s going on in my body. And as a biologist, that''s always been fascinating to me!

I feel so empowered as a woman... Yet another reason to say thank you PS! I wouldn''t have heard of this book without you all.

 

[ChargerGrrl]

Anchor- Yep, isn''t TCOYF a great resource?! I admit it be a bit overwhelming, but I like having it around to refer to. Just need to actually begin charting...

 

[robbie3982]

Hey ladies, I have a charting question. This is only my second month charting and FF has me really confused. Here''s a link to my charts:

http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1d589b

When I put in my temp this morning, there were no crosshairs. I went back to look at it later and there were crosshairs on CD12. I was thinking that I might have just Oed on CD19 and was expecting the crosshairs to show up tomorrow if I entered a third high temp. I really don''t get why it''s saying CD12. It doesn''t seem to meet any of the criteria.

So, do you think it''s just messed up (if so, any idea how to fix it?) or did I actually O way earlier than I thought. If you think it''s right, what signs am I missing that point towards this? If I did O on CD12, why would it not show up until now (CD21)?

I thought charting was supposed to make thing clearer not more confusing!

 

[janinegirly]

hi, i''m no expert, but the dotted crosshairs means it''s not able to pinpoint O definitively, namely b/c you don''t have 3 high temps in a row. are you temping the same time everyday? looks like same thing happened last month.

i can''t identify why it backtracked O so many days, but maybe it''s b/c it''s taking into account secondary signs (EW,etc)? I''m trying to understand charting myself since I''m new to it too, so would like to hear what others think.

my other suggestion would be to buy an OPK next month so you have another tool to identify O and bettter understand your patterns.