Letter from a concerned and turned off PS member - now a Permanently turned off PSer

[mia1181]

Date: 11/10/2008 2:45:08 AM
Author: Dancing Fire

Date: 11/10/2008 2:28:58 AM
Author: mia1181

Date: 11/10/2008 2:14:27 AM
Author: Dancing Fire
i wanted to post my opinion on the prop 8 thread,but i decided to keep my mouth shut. why don''t you guys behave like Dfire ?

i don''t get into an argument with anybody on PS.

btw; i voted YES on prop 8

Actually you didn''t leave your mouth completely shut. As I recall you wrote something to the effect of ''I''m not telling how I voted on this one'' and I''m pretty sure it was accompanied by one of these emoticons -->

So we knew exactly how you voted. In fact, I am pretty sure all of the responses before yours were in favor of the No vote and supporting Wishful. So I''m not really sure why you felt the need to chime in. As I said before you could have let it go. You didn''t have to write anything at all.

why ??? only those that voted ''No'' can post their opinion

anyway, i didn''t post the reason why i voted YES.

Actually my point was in the one specific situation, it would have been nice for people to just back off since there was a person who was sensitive to the debate. It was rubbing salt in her wounds. And I know "blah, blah, blah this ATW, it''s for political debates." It would have been nice for people to just let it go. That''s all I am saying... it would have been nice...

 

[mia1181]

Then I fully admit to being a moron. I completely missed it. TGuy is always yelling at me for speed reading.

ETA, there I went speed reading again. I KNEW she was in a SS relationship, and I DID read in her first post on the thread she was married. However I didn''t know she had JUST gotten married days earlier by flying to California and eloping. Make sense? Eek.

See... that is just a misunderstanding it happens....

 

[mia1181]

Date: 11/10/2008 2:47:04 AM
Author: Linda W

Yes, Wishful had just gotten married. She was upset that it would be invalid now. I see that she is online and I wish that little sweetheart would post. I wish that she would see that we care for her.

He he I know! She''s been on a while.... don''t know if she is reading this but I wouldn''t blame her if she avoided this section....

I have her email.... want to write something to her.... but what to say? I am so not the person with the right things to say at the right moment...

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 11/10/2008 2:53:30 AM
Author: mia1181

Then I fully admit to being a moron. I completely missed it. TGuy is always yelling at me for speed reading.

ETA, there I went speed reading again. I KNEW she was in a SS relationship, and I DID read in her first post on the thread she was married. However I didn''t know she had JUST gotten married days earlier by flying to California and eloping. Make sense? Eek.

See... that is just a misunderstanding it happens....

Which kind of makes me think about the original question...

With so much room for misunderstanding, is it really ever a great idea to debate hot topics on an internet forum?

Hm, I gotta wonder now. I''m just glad I was balsy enough to ask Linda what bothered her (and glad she was balsy enough to say I bothered her, hehehe) because I am VERY glad we cleared the air on that one!

 

[mia1181]

Date: 11/10/2008 2:56:54 AM
Author: TravelingGal

Date: 11/10/2008 2:53:30 AM
Author: mia1181

Then I fully admit to being a moron. I completely missed it. TGuy is always yelling at me for speed reading.

ETA, there I went speed reading again. I KNEW she was in a SS relationship, and I DID read in her first post on the thread she was married. However I didn''t know she had JUST gotten married days earlier by flying to California and eloping. Make sense? Eek.

See... that is just a misunderstanding it happens....

Which kind of makes me think about the original question...

With so much room for misunderstanding, is it really ever a great idea to debate hot topics on an internet forum?

Hm, I gotta wonder now. I''m just glad I was balsy enough to ask Linda what bothered her (and glad she was balsy enough to say I bothered her, hehehe) because I am VERY glad we cleared the air on that one!

I know! You two impress me! I wish more people were like that!

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 11/10/2008 2:56:17 AM
Author: mia1181

Date: 11/10/2008 2:47:04 AM
Author: Linda W

Yes, Wishful had just gotten married. She was upset that it would be invalid now. I see that she is online and I wish that little sweetheart would post. I wish that she would see that we care for her.

He he I know! She''s been on a while.... don''t know if she is reading this but I wouldn''t blame her if she avoided this section....

I have her email.... want to write something to her.... but what to say? I am so not the person with the right things to say at the right moment...

Tell her she is important, her story is important and while she may be tired of fighting, she will pave the way for my daughter or Linda''s grandsons or anyone else''s children so they won''t have to. She has support here on PS and she doesn''t have to "debate"...we all just like to share about our lives here.

Oh, and tell her I''m sorry!

 

[vintagecushion]

Oh Mia, I just remembered you from Wishful's other thread! We're all fellow elopers. If you do write to her please let her know how terrible I feel...but I suppose I wouldn't know what to say either.

 

[HollyS]

Date: 11/10/2008 12:06:36 AM
Author: VRBeauty
I''ve enjoyed much of the ATW discussion during this election cycle. I found a lot of the discussion thought-provoking, and there were many times when I learned from what others had to say, or considered my own opinions in a different light.

I am a liberal from a deeply religious family. I found it very offensive when people were labeled as bigots because of positions they took that were based on their religious beliefs, especially when that label was put on some of our more considerate and thoughtful (albeit conservative

) ATW participants.

The discussion on most politically-oriented forums is blatantly one-sided and dismissive of opposing opinions; ruled pretty much by mob mentality. Most of the time I don''t think that was the case in ATW...maybe that was because my viewpoint was aligned with the majority of the posters? But there were times when this became a very inhospitable place. If I was part of that, I''m sorry.

As for ''staying out of the kitchen,'' I suppose that is one option. As I said, I''m a liberal and I found lots of posters with similar viewpoints here. But... if ATW was just a bunch of like-minded people patting themselves on the back for their ''open-mindedness,'' it wouldn''t be much of a discussion and there wouldn''t be much reason to drop by.

And that is the post here which makes the most sense. ATW is supposed to be an open forum about issues that are far more important and controversial than jewelry. If we cannot have a discussion, from all points of view, where constant bashing or worse, political correctness does not constantly rear its ugly head, then perhaps it is time to do away with the threads. But the issues themselves are not one-sided, and we shouldn''t have to be; there really isn''t any reason to assume there would never be hot button topics, and no one would ever feel passionate about their opinion. If this is something people cannot tolerate, then find a different thread.



Opposing viewpoints, however, are not reason enough to make personal attacks; and just in case anyone wants to jump on their soapbox and accuse me, well let''s just say I never called anyone: bitter, old, in need of meditation, in need of medication, a bigot, a racist, intolerant, blah, blah, blah. Never. If you can find any instance, pull it and post it and I''ll apologize. But all of the above have been lobbed at me. And no one found it the least bit offensive, save for myself.

Quite a few here, venting their frustration at the turn these threads eventually take, just need to look in the mirror. And that includes the posters who show up on occasion to lament our ''tone'', but while lamenting, have to add their voice to the chorus singing their tune, and chastise the other side, all in the name of disliking disharmony. Uh huh.

This has been page after page of postings where, once again, nothing is accomplished, nothing is resolved, because the worst offenders are the ones most offended. Bring this big gripe fest to a close, folks. Your hypocrisy is showing.

 

[Ali]

After reading the following post, I see that I need to clarify the expectations of posting opinions on the forum.

I believe that the attempt to limit the rights of others by anyone, regardless of religious background and/or affiliation, is bigotry, and when asked, I will say so.

I certainly wasn''t trying to offend anyone by saying so, but it is my opinion, and since most people here seem to agree that we should respect opinions different from our own, I don''t see why my opinion should be any different.

Yes, everyone is entitleted to their own opinion and no, not everyone will agree with them BUT for the purposes of posting here, you must only post opinions of the ISSUES and not eachother.

Calling someone a name according to one''s own ''opinion'' is considered a personal attack.

You may debate/defend/argue the ISSUE but you may not post negative remarks or opinions about other members.

 

[Ellen]

Hey Moon, wanna mushroom?

 

[MoonWater]

Sure Ellen, want a cigar?

 

[Irishgrrrl]

Date: 11/10/2008 2:30:28 AM
Author: TravelingGal

I do agree mia.

I have been on PS along time, but I don''t post as often as some...and I really am bad at reading all the threads. I looked up some of Wishful''s posts that night and realized I had missed her wedding thread, and several threads on gay marriage where she said many profound things.

I went to bed thinking about it. And that''s why I got up in the morning and made my one post to PS that day (I think it was anyway).

I did not vote for or against prop 8. If people really want to know why the ''opposition'' thinks the way I do, I just wanted to throw in where I have come from and where I am going on this issue. Alj made a very good point on that thread that calm discussion goes a long way to change minds vs rants and flailing fists. Wishful then posted a very heartfelt post on the fact that she is just a person, and why does she always *have* to be calm - when she was justifiably angry (or something like that).

People ranting, calling others ignorant and stupid for what they believe in do not sway my views. My gay friends DO sway my views because we have heartfelt discussions about where we''ve all come from. Wishful''s story (after I read it) touched me. This battle will be won one person at a time, and I believe it is important to have someone like Wishful around - just to be herself and post about her life.

Hi, TGal!

Before the Prop. 8 thread was deleted, I apologized for the "ignorant" comment, but I''m not sure if you had a chance to see that. So I apologize again.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 11/10/2008 9:15:48 AM
Author: MoonWater
Sure Ellen, want a cigar?

Thanks, but I'm one step ahead of ya.

(I needed it to get through this thread)

 

[Ali]

To address the original issue:



First and foremost, it should be duly noted that Diamond education is our first priority and always will be. Rocky Talky is and will remain at the top of the forum as the foundation of Pricescope.
On the flip side, as a benefit to our wonderful and diverse community, we have created several different outlets for members to discuss others issues in life that interest them. We are happy to provide these areas as a way for our members to convene about other things that may not directly relate to diamonds but serve as a way to discuss issues with other diamond enthusiasts.

ATW has always been a more intense area because these worldly topics tend to touch on bigger issues. Not everyone is comfortable visiting this section but we are trying very hard to accommodate those who do wish to discuss these issues even though they are sometimes a little controversial.
Obviously, these heated topics take great effort to moderate but we are willing to do so because there are many who enjoy this area. Of course, moderation takes time and is usually a gray line but our goal is to be consistent and fair. Everyone should know what to expect and what is expected of them when posting on the forums. In return, we ask that you respect Pricescope and other members of the community and always remember that all of the forums are a privilege.
The Pricescope Café and all of the sub forums, including ATW, is just an extra 'recreational' area. This doesn't mean it is not subject to the same policies as the rest of the site but it is a minor part of the entire foundation of Pricescope. We have tried to create areas that will be of interest to everyone and our hope is that each person will find an area that is beneficial/enlightening/helpful to them and that they will focus on and use those areas of the forum. We didn't create any area as a 'must visit'. If you don't like an area of the forum, please feel free to send us your suggestions and don't feel like you have to read and take part in it. A good 'reset' is the thread previously mentioned here by Iwannaprettyone that she created \"Remember our roots - why did ya join\" It is still pinned at the top of the Hangout section and serves as a good reminder of why we are all here. There is something for everyone.

Please enjoy Pricescope and the areas that interest you and always remember to respect the diversity that the forums and our members provide.