How do I get over this??

[FireGoddess]

Date: 8/31/2007 1:41:32 PM
Author: *~Sweetpea~*
I was FURIOUS! I mean, he NEVER EVEN LOOKED to check the lane I was in.

I slowed down, pulled into his lane behind him and called the ''how is my driving'' number and reported him. I was so mad, who doesn''t even check their mirrors or look at all when they switch lanes???? I don''t do it in my little Honda Civic, and he was pulling that with an 18 wheeler.

Good for you for reporting him! I think that sometimes, some of these truck drivers just figure that traffic will just have to move around them, as in a head to head competition, the little car will always lose.

 

[ChinaCat]

Oh, good topic! I have been saying for years that people should be required to take a yearly "etiquette" class where you are reminded of such things as: don''t cut in line, Let people OFF the elevator before you ram yourself in, don''t cut people off, say please and thank you. You know, things that are apparently too difficult to remember. It''s not that hard to be polite.

I have SEVERE road rage, picked it up in California where people are unbelievably bad drivers AND rude. I get a little too worked up and so have tried to find other ways to deal rather than honking and giving the finger ( I live in a state where concealed weapons are allowed). This is childish, but sometimes I shake my head or shake my finger at them like you would a bad dog or small child. Somehow makes me feel better. Or I try to turn the radio up and sing and zone out so that I LOOK like a mellow person who could care less about the other guy''s obnoxious behavior.

Southwest is a big pet peeve. I always say excuse me or speak up if people try to cut in line. It''s just plain rude. However, Europe is FAR worse. I have literally been knocked down by little old ladies rushing to get to the front of the line to get onto the airplane and at least on Southwest most people line up. In Europe on the similar no assigned seating airlines, people just rush the doors. It''s pretty hysterical (albeit frustrating and rude). So I guess it could be worse.

But the worst thing by far to me is people speaking loudly on their cell phones in public places. I''m sorry, do you think we really care or want to hear about your enema? Yes, I have actually heard this.

GRRRRR!

 

[DivaDiamond007]

I hear all of you about all of the rudeness these days. Two weeks ago a client said that I looked "fatter" than the last time he was in. Uhhhh........why on Earth would you say that to anyone much less a woman!?

I didn''t even know what to say to the guy, who, by the way, must weigh around 400 pounds.

People always seem to run into me too. For example if DH and I are at the mall and encounter someone in our path they''ll usually swerve to avoid my (6''1" built) hubby and ram right into me (5''0" tiny tiny). If I give a WTH look the person will get all snobby about it. Since when is it okay to just run into us shorties?

In the car I''m a bit more agressive. I''m not afraid to lay on the horn if you''re sitting at a green light too long or are doing something dangerous. If I''m being taligated I''ll slow down to the speed limit and try to get them to pass. If they don''t then I start going slower, slower and slower until they get the point. One time this lady in a minvan (always) was tailgating me down my road so I slowed down and she flew past me - only to get behind another car that she couldn''t get around due to traffic coming in the other direction. I got right up on her and gave a little wave. She was pi$$ed.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/31/2007 1:41:32 PM
Author: *~Sweetpea~*
I totally hear you, Ellen on the rude drivers thing!!


I was FURIOUS! I mean, he NEVER EVEN LOOKED to check the lane I was in.

I slowed down, pulled into his lane behind him and called the ''how is my driving'' number and reported him. I was so mad, who doesn''t even check their mirrors or look at all when they switch lanes???? I don''t do it in my little Honda Civic, and he was pulling that with an 18 wheeler.

Geeez.

I think everyone should have that sign on the back of their car.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/31/2007 3:33:37 PM
Author: DivaDiamond007
I hear all of you about all of the rudeness these days. Two weeks ago a client said that I looked ''fatter'' than the last time he was in. Uhhhh........why on Earth would you say that to anyone much less a woman!?

I didn''t even know what to say to the guy, who, by the way, must weigh around 400 pounds.

People always seem to run into me too. For example if DH and I are at the mall and encounter someone in our path they''ll usually swerve to avoid my (6''1'' built) hubby and ram right into me (5''0'' tiny tiny). If I give a WTH look the person will get all snobby about it. Since when is it okay to just run into us shorties?

In the car I''m a bit more agressive. I''m not afraid to lay on the horn if you''re sitting at a green light too long or are doing something dangerous. If I''m being taligated I''ll slow down to the speed limit and try to get them to pass. If they don''t then I start going slower, slower and slower until they get the point. One time this lady in a minvan (always) was tailgating me down my road so I slowed down and she flew past me - only to get behind another car that she couldn''t get around due to traffic coming in the other direction. I got right up on her and gave a little wave. She was pi$$ed.

I think I would have said something like, Yeah? Well you''re a lot ruder than last time you were in. Good grief.

 

[WinkHPD]

Date: 8/30/2007 7:24:05 PM
Author:Ellen

So, what do I do?

Go to the bookstore, buy a book called "The Four Agreements" I forget the author''s name. (It will come to me once I hit send) It is a book of Toltec wisdome that is very applicable to the current world.

The first agreement is to realize that it is NOT about you. Once you come to realize that fully, the rude person will loose the ability to harm you in any way mentally. (Driving her car into you would still be bad!)

It wont change their behavior, but it will change your feelings and you will spend less time being upset.

Somewhere along the line, you will find that when you are being happy, happy things tend to happen to you, and bad ones do not. I know this sounds simplistic, but it has proven to be so for me many many times. I frequently end up with a nicer car than I rented, a better room than I reserved and don''t get me started on the portions I tend to be given for dessert after a great meal. When I travel I am always treated well, even in France which people tell me tends to be rude. My wife and I found it to be wonderful and delightful, with food to die for and much laughter with the people there.

Of course, I am being a guy and assuming you wanted an answer when you really probably would just like me to listen, so I wont be offended if you don''t go buy the book...

Wink

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/31/2007 7:00:28 PM
Author: Wink

Date: 8/30/2007 7:24:05 PM
Author:Ellen

So, what do I do?

Go to the bookstore, buy a book called ''The Four Agreements'' I forget the author''s name. (It will come to me once I hit send) It is a book of Toltec wisdome that is very applicable to the current world.

The first agreement is to realize that it is NOT about you. Once you come to realize that fully, the rude person will loose the ability to harm you in any way mentally. (Driving her car into you would still be bad!)

It wont change their behavior, but it will change your feelings and you will spend less time being upset.

Somewhere along the line, you will find that when you are being happy, happy things tend to happen to you, and bad ones do not. I know this sounds simplistic, but it has proven to be so for me many many times. I frequently end up with a nicer car than I rented, a better room than I reserved and don''t get me started on the portions I tend to be given for dessert after a great meal. When I travel I am always treated well, even in France which people tell me tends to be rude. My wife and I found it to be wonderful and delightful, with food to die for and much laughter with the people there.

Of course, I am being a guy and assuming you wanted an answer when you really probably would just like me to listen, so I wont be offended if you don''t go buy the book...

Wink

Yer right, that''d be bad.


Thanks Wink, for the book recommendation. I will look it up. It certainly cannot hurt, and may very well help. And I really did want answers.

The thing is, I am a pretty happy person, and feel very blessed. I do believe you "get what you give". If I''ve given the impression I sulk/brood all the time about rude people I run into, I''m sorry, because honestly, that isn''t the case. But admittedly, it has started affecting me more at the time I run into them, and I don''t like it, for all the obvious reasons. So, I need to deal with it.


Again, thanks for the suggestion. And really, you didn''t even need to explain all the nice things that happen to you. You''re a good guy, I would assume no less.

 

[WinkHPD]

Thank you, and as promised, moments later the name came back to me...

Don Miguel Ruiz.

Wink

 

[Haven]

Ellen--It IS hard to be kind sometimes, I hear ya!

ChinaCat--Okay, you got me. The ONE response I will often make to aggressive drivers (other than a big smile) is the finger wag. I used to wave my hand in front of my rear view mirror when people were following too closely, but then I think someone once mistook my gesture for a flip of the bird, so to speak. So then I adopted the finger wag. When they pass by me (which they almost always do far too quickly) I turn and give a nice smile.

Wink--I agree with every single word you said. I try to be as gracious and happy as possible, and people are always giving me things for free or discounting products or letting me go ahead of them in line--it''s amazing!

I haven''t paid for a Chipotle meal for over three years because one day I struck up a conversation with one of the managers after he asked me how I was doing, and since then I think he''s told all of his employees that I am not to pay when I go there. They even comp my friends and boyfriend when we go together. This made me uncomfortable for a while so I stopped going, and when I came back he asked why I disappeared so I told him the truth and he told me I was being ridiculous, and then he said "A smiling, happy face sitting in front of our restaurant is worth far more than any commercial we can buy." How sweet.

I seriously think that being genuinely nice is a hot commodity in today''s world. I''ve been given discounts on luggage at Marshall Fields, cameras at Best Buy, and you wouldn''t believe how frequently employees at various restaurants comp my meal. And trust me, I don''t look like I''m starving or anything! My boyfriend didn''t believe me when we first started dating, but now he''s seen it in action and he tells his friends that everywhere we go people always want to feed me!

Anyway, I''m going to go check out that book, Wink, thanks for the suggestion.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 8/31/2007 7:39:34 PM
Author: Wink
Thank you, and as promised, moments later the name came back to me...

Don Miguel Ruiz.

Wink

Haven, yes, I have had stuff given to me too. The best, most recent was a brand new replacement tire, free, even though the replacement warranty had run out. Hey, tires are spensive!

But yeah, it really does pay to be nice. And what a thoughtful comment about your smiling face.

 

[AGBF]

I am enjoying this thread. I have heard the wisdom in what pretty much every poster wrote. I completely agree with Ellen about the manners of others (they do not resemble mine) and also with Deco (I am happier expecting nothing). I loved Wink's point about acceptance. I definitely see a correlation between accepting the situation as I find it and happiness. I guess everyone has just said something I can relate to .

One of my worst experiences with someone rude was in a grocery store. It was hideously embarrassing for me. I don't know if I ever told it here. It happened in an upscale organic food market in an upscale Connecticut town with very wealthy, thin blonde women shopping for expensive, healthy foods. (Since this incident I have had my cart stolen from the first-i.e. the produce-aisle and so I now always hold onto it with one hand.)

I was overweight and not well dressed at the time of the incident. I do not recall how overweight I was or what I was wearing; I recall that when the scene began that I was very conscious that I did not look like the person more likely to be in the right!!!

I had taken an empty cart into the store with me and started shopping in the produce aisle. I remember that I picked up some green grapes, which I had in the little basket in front. I then picked up a few other things and moved into the cheese and yogurt area.

While I was looking for an item my cart disappeared. I looked around for it and saw, as has happened before many times in stores, that another customer had mistakenly taken my cart. Usually I point this out, my fellow customer realizes the error, and we resume shopping, each with his own cart.

In this case the young woman, who had a daughter of about six to ten years old with her started to argue with me. She said (loudly), "Are you crazy?". She said she had brought this cart in with her from outside. She yelled that I was just too lazy to go bring in my own cart, so that I wanted to take hers. She asked her daughter if she hadn't brought this in with her. (The daughter shrugged.) I pressed my point, trying to get her to look at my groceries. She screamed, "This woman is crazy!" and got another cart, emptying all her purchases into it as she screamed. In her frenzy she started to drop all my purchases (which were under hers) into her new cart, too, and I shrieked, "Not my grapes!"

Somehow that must have penetrated because she said to her daughter (not a word to me!!!!), "This woman may be right. This may be her cart. Come on."

In the meantime I felt like a big, fat spectacle who had been publicly humiliated in front of everyone in the store. It all took place at what seemed (at least to me) to be an enormously high decibel level and in what felt like the center of the store. I was yelled at and asked if I was crazy, told I was lazy and lying about a cart! I felt like a heroine that I was able to resume my grocery shopping after all of that....

But it really seems quite funny to me now. She was a very crazy lady, and my manners were impeccable. As one of my friends to whom I told the entire story pointed out, even when she screamed, "Are you crazy?" I was ladylike enough to reply, "No, but I think you may be" rather than something more emphatic like, "You are". . Live and learn.

Deb

 

[WinkHPD]

LOL! No wonder you get on so well! Great story.

 

[Ellen]

Aw Deb, I really am sorry that happened to you. Some people truly are awful. Sounds like you handled it with real class.

And I''m glad you''re enjoying the thread. I am too, I really have gotten some good suggestions that I''m going to try. (and not just the hazard lights)

 

[diamondsrock]

this thread is great and I can relate to so much of what has been said. I still think people should hold the door for you when you leave a store, say please and thank you, apologize if you bump into someone, and in general just be polite. I know that I make an effort to do these things. I''m sure there are times when I may be unknowingly rude and clueless, but I hope those aren''t too often. Unfortunately, I don''t see other people doing these things and I used to get really upset. I still do sometimes, although I''ve just lowered my expectations from people in general, so as not to be disappointed. I also try to give people the benefit of the doubt that they are just dumb, not rude, and sometimes that makes me feel a little better.

A couple of months ago I was in line at a store and there was an elderly woman in front of me with like two or three items. I had a basketfull of maybe 20 things so I asked her if she wanted to go ahead of me. You wouldn''t believe how appreciative and honestly happy she was. She thanked me more than once, and I think she couldn''t believe a total stranger was being kind to her. I kind of got the warm fuzzies knowing I made her day with such a simple gesture.

One thing about drivers that bugs me is when people merge onto the highway without looking, just assuming the other driver will move over. This can be really dangerous if there is no room in the other lane and you''re trapped between one car on the left and another merging on the right. I have a friend who is really a kind, thoughtful person, who was driving one day with me. Someone started to merge into our lane and she said, he''d better look out and slow down because I shouldn''t have to move (which I agreed with). Then later, as she was merging, she said that driver better move over and make room for me! I''m like, ok, not sure what to say here, so I just giggled and kept quiet. Funny how people change the rules when they apply to them!

Wink, I''m going to check out that book. Thanks for the info.!

 

[luckystar112]

I'm posting in this thread late, which is sad because one of my favorite topics is annoying people!

I think that anytime you have to follow someone, whether in a car or walking, people are just going to annoy you. For instance when walking up stairs....what is so hard about staying to the right?!?!? Same thing with the mall. I wouldn't say I walk "fast" but I do walk at a steady pace and I hate to be slowed down by people in front of me talking on their cell phones or just completely oblivious to the person behind them.

When driving or at the grocery store I'm pretty much annoyed by 75% of the people. But the funny thing is that I can't think of a specific example because I get over it pretty quickly. Same with driving. I guess I'm lucky in that respect because I can curse and get really pissed off but not remember it the next day.

In another thread I mentioned how I don't drive on freeways anymore--well that's due to the fact that I just don't feel safe. After almost being side swiped a million times and people cutting me off I had had enough. Luckily I work closer to home yet so I don't have to take a freeway anywhere. But still.

When someone's riding my a$$ I do the slowing down thing too...except I take it wayyyyyyy down, to like 20mph or less. And I talk to them in a baby voice through my rear view mirror. When they try to pass me after that I speed up to make it hard for them. Seriously, I have no clue how I'm not dead yet. lol. I get scared of pissing off the wrong person, so I haven't done it in a while. But I typically do 7-9 miles over the speed limit, so the way I see it is if you're in a hurry you should leave earlier. I have no sympathy for people talking on their cell phone while driving. I won't even answer mine! I feel that those people are pretty much trying to kill me---so I'll honk as I please. In fact, that's how I look at driving in general, especially people on their cell phone---like their goal is to kill me and I have to drive defensively.

I suck at confrontation in real life, but being in a car is like have a couple helpings of spinach. The problem is that it's like that for everyone.

 

[Dee*Jay]

I have some how managed to resist posting on this thread until now, but NO LONGER. (Attribute it to the three glasses of wine with dinner--to which the HH and I walked to and from thank you very much.)

I can't stand bad/stupid/inattentive/you name the adjective drivers that I encounter EVERY DAY. And as a real estate agent I cannot put down the window and scream "You ridiculous C*NT--what the F*CK is wrong with you" with my clients in the car. But believe me, it is tempting. And I use my bluetooth headset as required by city law. I do not check my blackberry e-mail at stoplights. And I make it a point not to mow down innocent pedestrians or sideswipe other vehicles during the course of driving.

There are reasons why not everyone can buy handguns, and this is one of them. I swear, if I could give in to every instant of rage there would be a massacure in the streets of Chicago.

Ellen, I feel your pain in the biggest way. Join me in a martini. And stay off the streets--it's not worth it.

 

[surfgirl]

Date: 8/30/2007 7:43:17 PM
Author: Gypsy
I'm a honker too. It really does help with the rage. Especially in CA. I had no idea what a TERRIBLE bunch of drivers we have out here in comparison to NEW JERSEY. Yup, you read that right, I think NJ drivers are MUCH better, and nicer than CA drivers.

I'm sorry Ellen. Give them a nice long honk. It'll get the little teeny boppers heart pumping like a rabbits.

Gypsy, a big fat WORD to that hon! I grew up in NJ and yeah, we drive a helluva lot better than the goons in California! Mr. Surfgirl thinks its because so many dippy people come to California to re-invent themselves and they just are in their own special world...I just think our society is really rude nowadays. And sadly, these rude people are teaching their children to be the rude adults of the future. It's depressing. From aggresive driving, to yapping all the FREAKING time on cell phones, to kids who run around pushing and bumping into you at the mall because they are oblivious to anything around them except themselves...it's a rude world.

Ellen, not much comfort I'm afraid but I'm with FG, let.It.OUT! It's healthier than internalizing all that toxic crap and it's not worth stewing over. I find particular joy in laying on the horn, a la FG, when I'm behind an erratic driver and I see they're on the phone. I enjoy seeing them hear the horn and swerve madly back into place while wildly looking around. I know, it's petty but it makes me feel a teensy bit better and it wakes them up as well.

Ellen, btw, HOW did you get that new avi shot? I'm begging for your secret photo lighting recipe...puleeze?!?

"Oh, good topic! I have been saying for years that people should be required to take a yearly "etiquette" class where you are reminded of such things as: don't cut in line, Let people OFF the elevator before you ram yourself in, don't cut people off, say please and thank you. You know, things that are apparently too difficult to remember. It's not that hard to be polite. "

ChinaCat (love your name for obvious reasons! Jerry lives..), this is so true! How difficult is it to exercise the basics in ettiquette? That rushing onto the elevator before people get off really bugs the crap outta me! Growing up in NYC area, I am just baffled that people actually dont KNOW that this is rude. And not using a turn signal/blinker when randomly and quickly changing lanes? Seriously, that's just unacceptable!

 

[Blenheim]

How timely. DH and I have been roller blading with our new dog lately, because it''s great at tiring him out. We got to a downhill that''s steeper than I''m 100% comfortable with, but it''s only the length of two houses and there''s a long straightaway afterwards. Just at the bottom of the hill, there was a road on the right that had a stop sign. A car was just sitting there. We watched for a couple of minutes, figured out that they must be parked, and decided to go down it. Just as I was passing through the intersection, the car starts driving very slowly and cuts in front of me. I''m going faster than the car, so I swerve to the right to avoid hitting it and start screaming. It then moves to the right, so I have to swerve to the left, still screaming. As I''m passing it, I see that the driver is TEXT MESSAGING WHILE DRIVING. Wth? She didn''t even look up at the sound of somebody screaming at the top of their lungs. I at least had a helmet on and wasn''t the one holding the dog''s leash (which allowed me to maneuver without tripping over him), but I still felt so vulnerable.

Generally, I try not to get upset at other drivers. It''s just not worth it. The most confrontational I''ve ever been was to leave someone a note saying "learn how to park" on their windshield, when they were taking up two full prime spaces in a very crowded parking lot. If someone''s truly being dangerous, I''ve sometimes taken down their license plate # and called the cops.

 

[Mara]

OMG Blen...MEGA MEGA pet peeve of mine is when people cannot PARK THEIR CAR correctly. Nevermind the blatantly rude dumba$$es who park taking an entire two spots like their car is somehow better or more special than anyone else''s (and god forbid they park diagonally which is somehow even more offensive than just taking up two spaces vertically)...but then also there are the people who park right over the line in a spot or so close to the line that you can''t get into the spot next to it. There are lines drawn on the ground for a reason people!!!! In a super crowded lot, there is nothing more irritating than driving by 3-4 pseudo spots that no one can get into except a motorcycle because 2 big SUV''s are crammed into compact spaces.

Gotta say though since I have gotten the Mini there are a lot more ''spots'' I can fit into, yesterday I passed a car in a crowded garage who was trying to fit into a spot where the people on either side parked wrong...and she couldn''t so she drove off. I backed up and zipped in and even had room to comfortably open my door, whee.

 

[Maisie]

I have to drive on a two lane motorway to get to work. If you imagine that we drive on the left in the UK and the slip road to leave the motorway is on the left.

I hate hate hate people who drive in the right hand lane (I always hug the left lane as I drive like your Grandma!) but decide at the last minute that they want to take the slip road! The bomb in front of you and up the slip road leaving you clutching your chest and wondering how you managed to escape a really nasty traffic accident! Not kidding this happens to me probably twice a week!

Now I am very ladylike

but I can use the very bad words when necessary....... The air turns blue when people do this to me!!!

 

[Ellen]

diamondsrock, I''m sure that lady WAS shocked, because people being nice and polite is such a rarity these days.

Good for you, literally.

lucky, I don''t feel safe on my small town streets! I wish I could get off them. It''s becoming insane around here, and I''m sure my kids are sick to death of me constantly telling them to drive defensively, but I HAVE to. They are on the road with a bunch of inconsiderate, out to lunch, on the phone, ready to kill drivers.

Dee, glad you dropped in.

Like I just said to lucky, I wish I COULD get off these streets, people are nuts.

Can I have two tini''s??

surfgirl, I SO agree about society, how rude everyone is, who we''re raising that are the future, etc., depressing indeed. I hate it.

My mom said something not that long ago, that she wished she''d been born 50 years earlier, so us kids didn''t have to live in this. I wish so too....Anyway, thanks for commiserating with me.

And, what''s this?? A magic chandelier is not enough for ya, you must have everything??!

Welllll, my "secret" is, 2 PM sun on my patio table. lol I have found that with this ring, that time of day, when the sun is fairly high, is by far the most productive. That''s it, except, it was almost 100 the day I took that. I''m pretty sure it has to be that hot to get a shot like that....

Blenheim, yeah, these phones are gonna kill people. No doubt about it.

I''m glad you avoided an accident. If I were you, I''d go someplace preferably without traffic.



Maise, does the air really turn blue??

That would be kinda nice actually. Got some person around you driving like an idiot? Just start cussing, a blue fog appears, person is temporarly disabled, you get away.

 

[Maisie]

Lol! I have to swear because I have a new car and I can never find the horn to honk quick enough!!

 

[ice_princess]

OOOOH, I know!!! People do seem to be getting ruder by the day. Somehow it seems that kids are the worst and Christmas in this town is an absolute nightmare. I HATE going shopping then because people just push you out of the way, especially in Marks & Spencer. Sometimes I just stand there gaping because I just cannot believe that some woman just pushed me out of the way!

It seems ridiculous because they want to get ALL the shopping done and they are so paranoid that all the shops are closed on Boxing day. It''s ONE day for heaven''s sake! They won''t starve...

For me the worst is in the Tube when people are supposed to wait for those on the carriage to get off before they start piling in, but NO...they somehow manage to push into the carriage while we are all still trying to get out. I''m so sick of it now I just start pushing back. Honestly, it makes me sick. Mostly it''s men who are bigger than I am but I think it catches them off guard when I push back, HA!

Another pet peeve of mine is when people sit chatting at the post office when they are supposed to be serving me, and usually they make bloody mistakes because they are so busy gossiping about some person, ARGHHH! And then of course when people talk on their mobiles when they are being served and then holding up the whole qeue because they have to try and search for their money etc while trying to hold the phone as well. It drives me absolutely nuts!

Sorry, rant over

 

[Maisie]

Date: 9/1/2007 9:57:57 AM
Author: ice_princess
OOOOH, I know!!! People do seem to be getting ruder by the day. Somehow it seems that kids are the worst and Christmas in this town is an absolute nightmare. I HATE going shopping then because people just push you out of the way, especially in Marks & Spencer. Sometimes I just stand there gaping because I just cannot believe that some woman just pushed me out of the way!

It seems ridiculous because they want to get ALL the shopping done and they are so paranoid that all the shops are closed on Boxing day. It''s ONE day for heaven''s sake! They won''t starve...

For me the worst is in the Tube when people are supposed to wait for those on the carriage to get off before they start piling in, but NO...they somehow manage to push into the carriage while we are all still trying to get out. I''m so sick of it now I just start pushing back. Honestly, it makes me sick. Mostly it''s men who are bigger than I am but I think it catches them off guard when I push back, HA!

Another pet peeve of mine is when people sit chatting at the post office when they are supposed to be serving me, and usually they make bloody mistakes because they are so busy gossiping about some person, ARGHHH! And then of course when people talk on their mobiles when they are being served and then holding up the whole qeue because they have to try and search for their money etc while trying to hold the phone as well. It drives me absolutely nuts!

Sorry, rant over

Lol! I know exactly what you mean about M&S! Its usually middle aged ladies who shove me out of the way! Its every woman for herself in there at Christmas time!!

 

[ice_princess]

Date: 9/1/2007 10:04:26 AM
Author: Maisie

Date: 9/1/2007 9:57:57 AM
Author: ice_princess
OOOOH, I know!!! People do seem to be getting ruder by the day. Somehow it seems that kids are the worst and Christmas in this town is an absolute nightmare. I HATE going shopping then because people just push you out of the way, especially in Marks & Spencer. Sometimes I just stand there gaping because I just cannot believe that some woman just pushed me out of the way!

It seems ridiculous because they want to get ALL the shopping done and they are so paranoid that all the shops are closed on Boxing day. It''s ONE day for heaven''s sake! They won''t starve...

For me the worst is in the Tube when people are supposed to wait for those on the carriage to get off before they start piling in, but NO...they somehow manage to push into the carriage while we are all still trying to get out. I''m so sick of it now I just start pushing back. Honestly, it makes me sick. Mostly it''s men who are bigger than I am but I think it catches them off guard when I push back, HA!

Another pet peeve of mine is when people sit chatting at the post office when they are supposed to be serving me, and usually they make bloody mistakes because they are so busy gossiping about some person, ARGHHH! And then of course when people talk on their mobiles when they are being served and then holding up the whole qeue because they have to try and search for their money etc while trying to hold the phone as well. It drives me absolutely nuts!

Sorry, rant over

Lol! I know exactly what you mean about M&S! Its usually middle aged ladies who shove me out of the way! Its every woman for herself in there at Christmas time!!

Hi Maisie
Do you live in the South of England? I''m in the South East and I''ve heard it''s worse here than in the north...The people in my town aren''t that friendly in any case but at Christmas it just seems to be worse...

 

[WorkingHardforSmallRewards]

I havent read this thread yet. But tonight I was walking wtih my fiance and some taxi driver beeped his horn and zoomed passed us down a very very skinny WALKING ONLY road, no cars or bycicles allowed. If I hadnt grabbed her and pulled her out of the way you would have been killed. I was really angry I took a couple of steps and started to run to catch up with him and I was actually thinking about trying to break into his car and do something (though from my early highschool days in a junk yard I know side door windows are really hard to break and its not about to happen from MY fist anyway.) But then I got control of myself and didnt actually do anything. I swear if he had been just a little bit slower I would be in some serious trouble myself tonight. Unfortunately my mind didnt calm down in time get his plates...ugh, I cant understand some people.

 

[diamondsrock]

oh, I wanted to add, I don''t think it''s just random people on the street who are rude. You wouldn''t believe the condescending, arrogant, short-tempered doctor I dealt with last year while dealing with my dad''s medical problems. This guy was an absolute nightmare, and it really bothered me because he wasn''t just some random guy on the street whom I could forget in an hour. He was my dad''s doctor. I have a bachelor''s degree but he treated me like a moron if I asked a medical question, like I was too stupid to understand and shouldn''t even be asking. (this isn''t a reflection of all doctors, most are great and professional.)

The ultimate act of rudeness I have seen was at my husband''s grandmother''s funeral. We were on our way to the cemetary, and a guy on a Harley (no offense to Harley owners here) cut into the funeral procession right in front of us. We yelled out the window, "Hey, what are you doing?", and he then proceeded to give us the finger! Nice! Everyone behind us in the procession saw the incident and was so upset as well. Also, there was a cop sitting nearby in a parking lot who we assume saw the whole thing but he did nothing.

Like I said before, I try to be kind to people but I honestly don''t expect the same in return. I have low expectations from people in general and kind of just assume people are jerks so I don''t get disappointed when they act like ones. I know that''s not a great way to deal with it, but it''s the only way I know how. It really is refreshing to see acts of kindness and polite manners, but unfortunately I don''t see it too often.

 

[ice_princess]

Date: 9/1/2007 12:38:27 PM
Author: diamondsrock
oh, I wanted to add, I don''t think it''s just random people on the street who are rude. You wouldn''t believe the condescending, arrogant, short-tempered doctor I dealt with last year while dealing with my dad''s medical problems. This guy was an absolute nightmare, and it really bothered me because he wasn''t just some random guy on the street whom I could forget in an hour. He was my dad''s doctor. I have a bachelor''s degree but he treated me like a moron if I asked a medical question, like I was too stupid to understand and shouldn''t even be asking. (this isn''t a reflection of all doctors, most are great and professional.)

The ultimate act of rudeness I have seen was at my husband''s grandmother''s funeral. We were on our way to the cemetary, and a guy on a Harley (no offense to Harley owners here) cut into the funeral procession right in front of us. We yelled out the window, ''Hey, what are you doing?'', and he then proceeded to give us the finger! Nice! Everyone behind us in the procession saw the incident and was so upset as well. Also, there was a cop sitting nearby in a parking lot who we assume saw the whole thing but he did nothing.

Like I said before, I try to be kind to people but I honestly don''t expect the same in return. I have low expectations from people in general and kind of just assume people are jerks so I don''t get disappointed when they act like ones. I know that''s not a great way to deal with it, but it''s the only way I know how. It really is refreshing to see acts of kindness and polite manners, but unfortunately I don''t see it too often.

I know what you mean. I''m sorry about your dad. It does make it so much more difficult if the doctor isn''t professional.

My bf went to a doctor a year or so back when he was having horrific nosebleads, and he actually to my bf that this is because he picks his nose.

Can you believe that??? How unprofessional. He wasn''t joking btw, at first bf thought he was kidding but he was in fact perfectly serious. He also told me I had back ache because I hated my job. He''s just horrible and I can''t stand him. Luckily he wasn''t my doctor but he seems to be the only one at the surgery who''s ever free when we need to make some urgent appointment. Hmmmm, I wonder why that is....

 

[ljmorgan]

I don''t really worry about whether someone is being "rude" on the road unless they nearly hit me! I just don''t let myself get upset over every tiny thing -- I think drivers take things too personally -- I''m not a victim. I think it''s very important to be able to keep yourself cool and collected, and being angry only hurts me, not the person I feel has slighted me on the road. In most cases people just aren''t watching what they''re doing, and being angry at them doesn''t do anything. If they are being jerks on purpose, being angry and showing them you''re angry, that won''t do any good either!

I don''t honk at anyone unless it looks like they''re going to hit me/coming into my lane, so they''ll hopefully snap to attention.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 9/1/2007 4:33:58 PM
Author: *Lindsey*
I don''t really worry about whether someone is being ''rude'' on the road unless they nearly hit me! I just don''t let myself get upset over every tiny thing -- I think drivers take things too personally -- I''m not a victim. I think it''s very important to be able to keep yourself cool and collected, and being angry only hurts me, not the person I feel has slighted me on the road. In most cases people just aren''t watching what they''re doing, and being angry at them doesn''t do anything. If they are being jerks on purpose, being angry and showing them you''re angry, that won''t do any good either!

I don''t honk at anyone unless it looks like they''re going to hit me/coming into my lane, so they''ll hopefully snap to attention.

Lindsey, let me preface this by saying, I am NOT picking on you personally. This sentence just hit me wrong, and I know you''re not the only one who thinks that or has said it. It just came up again, and this time I had to say something.

When someone is driving a 2 ton machine that can kill," just not watching what they are doing", is NOT what they should be doing. And not saying anything is like excusing it. And I''m sorry, but I don''t WANT to excuse it. I don''t want me or my kids to be killed, or maimed, just because somebody didn''t have their eyes on the road like they are supposed to. I just don''t get this type of thinking. If we let people be careless on the road, they''ll only get worse, cuz hey, nobody seems to care. Is that what people want??

Here''s another example of what I''m dealing with. Today on the way to the store, I was going down a 2 lane street (that I''ve traveled daily for 20 years), with parking on sides. There is more than enough room to drive easily without hitting cars. This is a fairly well traveled road. What I''ve noticed in the last 2-4 months is, people are beginning to drift and either ride the yellow line, or actually be slightly in my lane. As I approach them, some move, some don''t. I passed no less than 3 cars doing this today in about a 5 block distance. Now, obviously, they just aren''t paying attention. Should I let that go? Should I just watch the road doubly hard because these people just aren''t watching what they''re doing?