Guessing the size of stone just by looking at a picture.

[purrfectpear]

The bottom line is that she has asked her husband and he has said it is not the same diamond.

Now you either trust your husband or you don''t. Anyone on this forum claiming they can tell from a picture is lying or stirring the pot. Period.

You asked if it was possible, and I am telling you clearly that it is NOT possible to determine. If it WAS possible, you''d be much better off asking a jeweler and showing them the pictures, though I know they will tell you the same...it cannot be determined from a picture. In fact two almost identical 1.81 diamonds cannot be identified from pictures of the quality you posted, much less two differently sized diamonds.

Seriously the rest is just drama and airing your personal problems.

 

[Independent Gal]

Purrfectpear, obviously OP doesn''t trust him, or else she wouldn''t have asked. None of us can tell from the picture whether it''s the same stone or not, but we can tell (any sane person could) that his story is extremely suspicious. Presumably, this lady would not have doubted her guy unless she had independent reasons to consider him untrustworthy.

But asking for non-biased outsiders'' impressions is a perfectly valid thing for a poster to do on PS, so long as she doesn''t want us to pass sure judgment or judge from the pictures, and I don''t think either Ally or I have claimed to do that.

 

[hibiscus]

that''s what i should have done when he offered to get it re-set but it sucks to be lied to... might as well just kept the stone in a safe, give me a simple e-ring in the first place. we would have this situation today.

i just called him, we''re going to get it re-set next week. i don''t want to live each day having doubts on the ring i''m wearing. it suppose to be special no matter how big the rock is.

 

[iheartscience]

Hmmm...from what you''ve said here, I think it probably is the same stone. What a dumb thing for him to do. When you busted him, he should have just owned up to it-it''s pretty obvious that it is the same stone based on what you''ve told us. (Year on cert, etc.) I would tell him you want a new (bigger, obviously!) diamond and you want it now. And I would be super irritated at him for lying to you about it.

 

[Elegant]

I agree. Trust his answer or not. It just doesn't sound like you will be satisfied with either of his answers because you just don't trust him right now and it's been some years since you have been suspicious, so do something to put your mind at rest - and I am sure he will also be happy your mind is at ease finally too!

So...

Start over and get something new - get rid of the diamond (upgrade it or put the whole ring up for consignment) and get a brand new one. He doesn't seem to mind.

So what decision are you leaning towards?

Sorry, just saw your post - must have been typing it the same time you were! Good choice - peace of mind - kind of disappointing and makes you question other things.

Sorry to hear about that! I hope you post your new ring in the SMTR forum!

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 8/3/2008 5:52:18 PM
Author: hibiscus
that''s what i should have done when he offered to get it re-set but it sucks to be lied to... might as well just kept the stone in a safe, give me a simple e-ring in the first place. we would have this situation today.


i just called him, we''re going to get it re-set next week. i don''t want to live each day having doubts on the ring i''m wearing. it suppose to be special no matter how big the rock is.

I agree-it can''t be fun wearing a ring that you don''t fully enjoy. If you need help choosing a new diamond, please ask! We can help steer you in the right direction as far as cut and where to buy!

 

[hibiscus]

yes purrfect, I guess you must love my drama to still hang around to answer my post twice. Apparently, I get your point- its not possible to guess the size of a stone just by looking at a picture". If I knew what I should have done all along, then I wouldn''t be in this forum. I was seeking for an answer not a smart a$% remark from you. Thanks anyway for wasting your time on this post, I suggest you get some rest, go shopping, eat something, walk your dog, water or mow the lawn..

 

[hibiscus]

Married since 2006 and we have a kid, just found the picture of that ring a few months ago. That''s when the suspicion arise.

 

[Elegant]

Date: 8/3/2008 6:00:16 PM
Author: hibiscus
Married since 2006 and we have a kid, just found the picture of that ring a few months ago. That''s when the suspicion arise.

That must have been very hurtful to you. I think you are justified in having suspicions. It is no fun to have people hide things from you.

 

[hibiscus]

Hmmm...from what you''ve said here, I think it probably is the same stone. What a dumb thing for him to do. When you busted him, he should have just owned up to it-it''s pretty obvious that it is the same stone based on what you''ve told us. (Year on cert, etc.) I would tell him you want a new (bigger, obviously!) diamond and you want it now. And I would be super irritated at him for lying to you about it.

haha, yes maybe bigger, consolidate all the 3 stones for the size of a BIG one. Yes, too many coincidences.Before i bore or upset anyone else with my "drama", (purrfect pear is apparently unhappy about my posting), to make long story short, no one in his family was "wow" or fascinated by the stone (as if they''ve seen it or maybe it just the way they are..) when they saw it for the first time on my finger.

 

[hibiscus]

will post a pic when i get a new/upgraded ring.

 

[coatimundi_org]

Date: 8/3/2008 6:14:10 PM
Author: hibiscus
will post a pic when i get a new/upgraded ring.

Please do!
Sorry you had to come to this realization. You''re taking it very well.
I look forward to seeing your new ring!

If you need any help looking for a stone/setting, please feel free to ask questions.

 

[Skippy123]

Hibiscus, please stick around;

glad you joined this forum and your post isn't usless drama! Sorry that you found that out but hopefully things will get sorted out.

 

[allycat0303]

Hibiscus,

I am really sorry you are going through this. Truthfully this is not the first time it has happened on PS. We had another poster (I think more then 1 year ago) that found out her ring was his ex-wife''s (or something of that nature) he fessed up to it and they got another one, but it was a really, really hurtful to her. I remember it was a 7-8 page thread.

Contrary to what another poster has said, I don''t think this is useless drama on your part. You wanted some opinons, and we tried to help you best we could.
If I was in your position, I would be absolutely livid, and very, very upset.

I completely understand the flip-side guy wise too. I think though, if he had come to you with the situation and been honest, you could have decided to trade-in the stone, keep it etc., depending on what made you comfortable. I think not telling you and then lying about it is MUCH worst then the inital use of the diamond. At this point, the diamond holds some negative emotions, and I would never want to wear something on a daily basis that upset me.

Good luck!

 

[hibiscus]

Thank you, I''m trying my best to stay sane and reasonable for I have a kid. Disappointed? Yes.Not only on having to change the ring but also my hubby wouldn''t elaborate further or come out clean but I'' need to move on.

 

[simplysplendid]

Girl, I like bling and couldn''t care less about their history, except for my engagement ring of course. So I''d say get him to get you a brand new anniversary ring -- 2ct no less (for giving you a ring that wasn''t meant for you in the first place) and turn the old one into a pendant. Or be super generous, after you get your new ring, pass this old one to his mother..

 

[hibiscus]

Thank you alll for answering my posting. Appreciate it a lot.

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 8/3/2008 6:12:53 PM
Author: hibiscus
haha, yes maybe bigger, consolidate all the 3 stones for the size of a BIG one. Yes, too many coincidences.Before i bore or upset anyone else with my ''drama'', (purrfect pear is apparently unhappy about my posting), to make long story short, no one in his family was ''wow'' or fascinated by the stone (as if they''ve seen it or maybe it just the way they are..) when they saw it for the first time on my finger.

Hahaha-now you''re talking! I think he owes you a 3 carat for lying to you about this diamond!

And I promise you that plenty of posters here want to hear your story, and I certainly don''t think you''re just causing drama. Please feel free to keep posting here about this or anything else! Just disregard the occasional argumentative reply you might get.

 

[hibiscus]

Simplysplendid, haha maybe i should eh.
I haven''t spoken to her since i asked her about the ring and she passed a sarcastic remark "are you trying to pick a fight with your husband?"

 

[diamondfan]

He certainly owes you for having mislead you! that is my story and I am sticking to it! Tell him if he would have been honest in the beginning you would not have liked it but it would not have opened Pandora''s box. The dishonesty thing would stick in my craw too. You are staying very together over this. Where did you happen to find the photo of the old ring? And what did he say happened to that ring? If she was cheating I doubt he just let her keep though who knows? He might have wanted to be totally done and not have a diamond to deal with.

 

[hibiscus]

Hahaha-now you''re talking! I think he owes you a 3 carat for lying to you about this diamond!

And I promise you that plenty of posters here want to hear your story, and I certainly don''t think you''re just causing drama. Please feel free to keep posting here about this or anything else! Just disregard the occasional argumentative reply you might get.


The last thing I wanted in life is drama and never in a million years imagine it happening to me. I have a tv and enough channels to surf for that kind of entertainment. I will post for sure.

 

[Rhea]

Better hope that your account can deal with the blow from a purchase of a 3 carat...expectations are running high on this thread right now

I imagine if he lied he knew he was caught out but expected that to be the end of that and that you wouldn''t be upset any further. I''d be upset if it were me as well. I hope that you two are able to quickly move past this.

 

[simplysplendid]

Date: 8/3/2008 6:46:46 PM
Author: hibiscus
Simplysplendid, haha maybe i should eh.
I haven''t spoken to her since i asked her about the ring and she passed a sarcastic remark ''are you trying to pick a fight with your husband?''

Heh, pass her the old ring (repackaged into something else eg: pendant) in response to her remark. Get your hubby to pay for the resetting. Giving her bling shows her what a good daughter in law you are..

And by being good to his mother, you are being a good wife too!

 

[diamondsrock]

Well welcome to the forum and I''m sorry that seems to be the same stone. Of course, no way to tell, but again, why buy a diamond for an investment back then to give his fiancee another? Very suspicious.
I hope this all works out. The right thing would have been for him to accept responsiblity and admit that he used the same stone (assuming he did), and not lie about it. The lying is worse than using the stone! I have to think, though, that men may not see the same sentimentality in a stone that we do, and figure he wouldn''t get as much for it, so why not use it again.
I hope this works out and you get an entirely different stone to your liking. There are many posters here who would be more than happy to help you hunt for one!
I think we all have drama at one point or another in our lives so no worries there. You are just expressing what is going on with you.

 

[hibiscus]

He certainly owes you for having mislead you! that is my story and I am sticking to it! Tell him if he would have been honest in the beginning you would not have liked it but it would not have opened Pandora''s box. The dishonesty thing would stick in my craw too. You are staying very together over this. Where did you happen to find the photo of the old ring? And what did he say happened to that ring? If she was cheating I doubt he just let her keep though who knows? He might have wanted to be totally done and not have a diamond to deal with.
****************************
"There is no such thing as fun for the whole family-there are no massage parlors with ice cream and free jewelry" Jerry Seinfeld

He took the ring back from her. As told, it was sold for the two side stones on my ring. I''m not an unreasonable person to begin with and despite the issue on the ring and other things along this marriage since ''06, I can''t simply walk away. I would love to, if I found out about it right in the very beginning but this is not the case. This issue alone is not enough to pull this family apart. That doesn''t mean, I want more issues to make it relevant to be done with him.

As or the pictures of the ring, I found it in a box along with some old pictures while boxing things up to move to our new house.

 

[hibiscus]

Heh, pass her the old ring (repackaged into something else eg: pendant) in response to her remark. Get your hubby to pay for the resetting. Giving her bling shows her what a good daughter in law you are.. And by being good to his mother, you are being a good wife too!

She has collected plenty of rings along the years from her husband, she''s 70. I don''t think she cares even if I fly her out to the moon. Don''t think I want to stoop that low by kissing her a$%. Nope, that''s just not me.

 

[simplysplendid]

Date: 8/3/2008 7:02:54 PM
Author: hibiscus
Heh, pass her the old ring (repackaged into something else eg: pendant) in response to her remark. Get your hubby to pay for the resetting. Giving her bling shows her what a good daughter in law you are.. And by being good to his mother, you are being a good wife too!

She has collected plenty of rings along the years from her husband, she''s 70. I don''t think she cares even if I fly her out to the moon. Don''t think I want to stoop that low by kissing her a$%. Nope, that''s just not me.

oh no no no.. not to kiss her a$$. I would do that to get rid of the ring that wasn''t meant for me. Upgrading to a bigger ring would mean that somehow this ring is still part of the new ring, just my opinion. So I would get rid of it and passing it to his mom serves this purpose plus the bonus i mentioned above.

 

[hibiscus]

it would just be too mean to do that to his mother. i''ll leave her alone. you''re right, i really don''t want anything to do with that stone but for his sake. I''m sure he doesn''t want to waste his "investment" by selling it off. I will keep it as a pendant, as long as it no longer goes on my finger, I''ll be content.

 

[princesss]

Hibiscus, I just logged back on and saw the rest of your story. I''d be very hurt if I were you, and I''m glad you''ve spoken with your husband and will be getting a new stone. I can''t imagine how I would feel in your position, and I''m sorry I wasn''t more sympathetic in my previous post.

 

[hibiscus]

Princess,

non taken to heart.