What if your ring is rejected

[kevinraja]

I thought this would be very informative if someone can answer it.

What if a guy buys an expensive diamond ring, and for some reason, his proposal was rejected. What does he do with the ring? Lets assume that the return period is over. How does he sell the diamond ring? How much % of purchase price can he expect to get back? Where can he sell? To the same dealer he bought it from, or somewhere else?

 

[windowshopper]

heavens..............are you worried?

 

[kevinraja]

I am afraid I am

 

[Rhino]

Date: 1/19/2005 11:19:54 AM
Author:kevinraja
I thought this would be very informative if someone can answer it.

What if a guy buys an expensive diamond ring, and for some reason, his proposal was rejected. What does he do with the ring? Lets assume that the return period is over. How does he sell the diamond ring? How much % of purchase price can he expect to get back? Where can he sell? To the same dealer he bought it from, or somewhere else?

One primary reason why you should review the *guarantees* & *policies* with whom you''re dealing with. Some offer more liberal return periods, lifetime tradein or lifetime buyback policy which ... if you''re conceerned may be of more importance to you now. Check with the vendor you''re dealing with about their particular policies.

 

[kevinraja]

The vendor I am dealing with has lifetime trade-in or upgrade policy. But what if, in the worst case scenario, I can''t afford to keep the ring to do a future trade-in. In otherwords, I would like to get my money back (ofcourse not 100%).

 

[codex57]

My buddy just kept the ring. Took out the diamonds and had them reset in a new setting when he got engaged later. Not sure what he did with the old setting. Possibly melted it down or something.

 

[realron75]

HAD to add my two cents. If you think she won''t say yes than don''t do it. I''ve already been through one crappy divorce. I wouldn''t proceed unless I was 100%. I''m planning on dropping the big ? in about a month and I know the answer will be yes. I hope you can feel the same way.

 

[denverappraiser]

Raja,

As Rhino points out, this will be entirely up to the individual jewelers policy. Most will have a limited amount of time that they will buy back a piece but this varies quite a bit from dealer to dealer. You also have the option to sell it to a 3rd party under whatever terms you can negotiate with that buyer. This puts you into exactly the same situation as every other customer who is making a private sale. Sometimes it''s difficult, sometimes it''s easy and it will depend on things like how much you paid, what your relationship with the new buyer is, current condition, current fashions etc. There have been quite a few threads about this issue.

Neil Beaty
GG(GIA) ISA NAJA
Independent Appraisals in Denver

 

[appletini]

I second the if you are not sure she will say yes then don't do it!

You need to be 100% certain that she will say yes. If you don't want to broach the subject with her, go ahead and ask her parents for their blessing, b/c if she's not sure, than I bet she has talked to them about it, and they will let you know.

I broke up with my ex two days before he was going to buy the ring. I knew I couldn't marry him and I knew it was getting close b/c he had been looking, and that it would make the whole situation a little easier if I said something before the ring was a factor. I asked my family if he had talked to them yet, and they said no, so I knew that I had a little time, but not much.

 

[codex57]

Date: 1/19/2005 11:40:24 AM
Author: realron75
HAD to add my two cents. If you think she won''t say yes than don''t do it. I''ve already been through one crappy divorce. I wouldn''t proceed unless I was 100%. I''m planning on dropping the big ? in about a month and I know the answer will be yes. I hope you can feel the same way.

You know, I have to agree here. I mean, every guy is nervous, but I knew it was gonna be yes. Maybe it''s cuz I''m a lawyer and know divorce lawyers, but if there''s some reasonable doubt, I''d wait on it. I have a personal 5 year rule where I refuse to propose until 5 years have passed in the relationship. I''m upfront about it. Some girls can''t handle that. I''m lucky cuz my girl saw it as I was willing to commit, and that I just wanted to be extra sure about it.

 

[noobie]

Date: 1/19/2005 11:29:28 AM
Author: kevinraja
I am afraid I am

Kevin, after all that effort and expense, I just gotta say good luck to you...

 

[Regular Guy]

I certainly second Noobie''s comments; best wishes, of course.

 

[niceice]

Date: 1/19/2005 11:32

7 AM
Author: kevinraja
The vendor I am dealing with has lifetime trade-in or upgrade policy. But what if, in the worst case scenario, I can''t afford to keep the ring to do a future trade-in. In otherwords, I would like to get my money back (ofcourse not 100%).

Ask the vendor to consign the diamond ring for you... Most of us do that for our clients.

"Every guy is nervous" agreed.

 

[lmurden]

5 years?

 

[Hest88]

If you''re not sure, propose without a ring. A ring does not a proposal make, and many people get engaged without one. If she wants to marry you it won''t matter if you have or don''t have a ring.

 

[belle]

i think the original question has already been answered, so i would like to address the underlying question:
thus is true: when you know, you know. no questions.

 

[windowshopper]

Date: 1/19/2005 12:40:49 PM
Author: lmurden
5 years?

can you say control freak!

 

[codex57]

Date: 1/19/2005 12:53:59 PM
Author: windowshopper

Date: 1/19/2005 12:40:49 PM

Author: lmurden

5 years?

can you say control freak!

hehe, actually, that''s one of VERY few demands I ever made. Plus, I think I helped make up for it with the ring I got her. Hell, she drives my BMW and I drive her Camry to work cuz she wants to. People who know me know what a big car freak I am and what a big sacrifice that is.

I see it as a weeding out tool. If that 5 year request doesn''t bother her much, being with someone 5 years DEFINITELY helps prove long term compatibility (hey, people change over time) and shows her mindset of being committed long term as well. Besides, the 5 years was during college and grad school so it would have been hard to get married anyways. The only regret I have was that I wasn''t in financial position to propose at the 5 year anniversary. The 50% divorce rate bothers me a lot for a variety of reasons so it''s a weird thing of mind that I want to be damn sure my wife is compatible for life. I guess I''m just real old fashioned in that I feel the marriage vows of "til death do us part" is a serious vow that deserves a lot of consideration and shouldn''t be broken.

That''s why, again, if you''re not sure, I''d advise waiting.

 

[lmurden]

Codex57, If you say so.

 

[tanuki]

Here''s my two cents. Propose first and involve your fiancee in the purchase of the ring. After all, she''s the one who will be wearing it the rest of her life.

My dear husband (we are still married) didn''t do this. When he proposed I was thrilled. Then I saw the ring. It just didn''t belong on my hand. It was too clunky and square and angular. I like my jewelry to have an organic, flowing line (think art nouveaux). Also, every piece of jewelry that I own is yellow gold and he hadn''t noticed that and bought a white gold setting. The first thing I had to do after accepting the proposal was to figure out how to tell him that I really, really, didn''t like the ring. I wish I hadn''t been through that situation. If I had been involved in the process from the beginning it would have been a much better situation for us both.

 

[onedrop]

Date: 1/19/2005 12:49:47 PM
Author: Hest88
If you''re not sure, propose without a ring. A ring does not a proposal make, and many people get engaged without one. If she wants to marry you it won''t matter if you have or don''t have a ring.

Sounds like he''s already purchased the ring. I just hope you don''t have to worry about the return policy on the ring. Maybe you should be less romantic about the proposal and have a serious talk with her about marriage and whether she is ready, especially if you have misgivings. Sure there is no surprise in that, but your fears about rejection might be laid to rest.

Good luck!

 

[Regular Guy]

Onedrop may be on to something....

 

[Kaleigh]

I get the feeeling you two have''nt really had those serious talks about the future and what your expectations are. If you are having some doubts it''s time to sit down and talk to her. Hopefully this will put your fears to rest and she feels the same way you do. This won''t hurt any kind of suprise, it''s just a talk.

 

[kevinraja]

Elton John's song: "... It’s sad, so sad. It’s a sad, sad situation."

We have been together for 4.5 years now. I always thought we were ready to do IT. Now, I am not so sure. Not that I have committment issues. I am stilly ready. But I am not sure that she is, even though she told me several times that she is. She picked the stone, the ring. Today is the last day to return the stone, if I had to. I told her of my concerns. She told me NOT to return the ring. I know she will say YES. Her parents know us, and I know they will say YES also when I ask them. But I am NOT sure she is honest in what she says, and that she really means what she says. I am just not too comforatble discussing my whole story here. I just pray to GOD that nobody in world should feel the way I feel or go through the pain that I am going through.

 

[belle]

sometimes people say things in order not to hurt someone else, not completely realizing that the greater hurt will come later. if you don''t feel this is right, don''t do it. i''ll say it again, when it''s right you''ll know. there will be no doubt. i know it''s hard to imagine this now because you''re in the middle of the forest too close to the trees, but it will make sense later. trust your heart.

 

[kevinraja]

sometimes people say things in order not to hurt someone else, not completely realizing that the greater hurt will come later.

I think that this is exaclty what she is doing to me, I might be wrong.

 

[realron75]

Kevin, I went through a horrible divorce two years ago, got cheated on, lies, decent, etc. Really really bad. None of this would have happened if either one of us had the guts to say this just isn''t meant to be BEFORE we got engaged and married. Save yourself the 5 years I wasted trying to make a bad marriage work and take the ring back. You can always buy another ring once you sort all this out.

 

[onedrop]

Kevin, my heart is breaking for you if you are that unhappy. I''ll just send some positive thoughts your way, that your issues and misgivings will be put to rest. All the best to you.

 

[Cath]

If today is the last day to return the ring, then return it. Take the time to sort out what''s going on. If later on you decide that this is how you want to proceed, you can always buy another ring.

Follow your gut, and good luck.

 

[codex57]

Good luck either way man