this may sound weird to guy''s but i have no idea .....

[fire&ice]

Do you really think that after 20+ years of successfully handling our business the way we do, I''d be sensitive about someone trying to sway me? And, where in my answer did I ever say that my way is the *right* way? It''s *my* right way. Geez.

Please don''t read anything else into the idea that I think all the extra steps would create more work for me. It''s a checking account. For me, it''s simple - money goes in money goes out. That''s how I view it. That is the position that I am coming from when I see what others do as creating extra work. Sorry, I voiced my *opinion* on the matter. I will keep the "*right*" thing to myself next time.

And, please don''t think that I expect everyone to see their checkbook the same way.

 

[aljdewey]

Speaking of money and how to discuss with your partner pre-marriage....looks like a good article:
http://www.bankrate.com/BOS/news/advice/20050412a1.asp

and HEE HEE HEE.....look at question #1!

Hysterical!

 

[aljdewey]

Date: 4/13/2005 5:19:14 PM
Author: fire&ice
Do you really think that after 20+ years of successfully handling our business the way we do, I'd be sensitive about someone trying to sway me? And, where in my answer did I ever say that my way is the *right* way? It's *my* right way. Geez.

Please don't read anything else into the idea that I think all the extra steps would create more work for me. It's a checking account. For me, it's simple - money goes in money goes out. That's how I view it. That is the position that I am coming from when I see what others do as creating extra work. Sorry, I voiced my *opinion* on the matter. I will keep the '*right*' thing to myself next time.

And, please don't think that I expect everyone to see their checkbook the same way.

Maybe it was the "nope - mine's simpler" and a few other phrases that led me to interpret that. Glad to hear it's not so.

No harm, no foul.

 

[fire&ice]

Date: 4/13/2005 5:35:38 PM
Author: aljdewey

Date: 4/13/2005 5:19:14 PM
Author: fire&ice
Do you really think that after 20+ years of successfully handling our business the way we do, I''d be sensitive about someone trying to sway me? And, where in my answer did I ever say that my way is the *right* way? It''s *my* right way. Geez.

Please don''t read anything else into the idea that I think all the extra steps would create more work for me. It''s a checking account. For me, it''s simple - money goes in money goes out. That''s how I view it. That is the position that I am coming from when I see what others do as creating extra work. Sorry, I voiced my *opinion* on the matter. I will keep the ''*right*'' thing to myself next time.

And, please don''t think that I expect everyone to see their checkbook the same way.

Maybe it was the ''nope - mine''s simpler'' and a few other phrases that led me to interpret that. Glad to hear it''s not so.

No harm, no foul.

I didn''t realize PC was the way to be on these boards. I will do better next time.

Geez, since when does nope, mine''s simpler = mine must be "right". Simple means just that - simple. Just for further clarification - my idea of simple may not be someone else''s idea of simple. And, I''m not proclaiming that simple is always a good thing. Simple isn''t always right; but, that also doesn''t mean that simple isn''t a good thing - or a bad thing. Sometimes, I like to keep things simple. That is not to say that others don''t want to keep things simple. And, what''s simple to me may not be totally simple to someone else; or, for that matter that my simple may be someone else''s complex.

I hope my disclaimer clears up this matter.

Now, my head is spinning when all along I wanted to keep things simple.

 

[fire&ice]

Date: 4/13/2005 5:31:46 PM
Author: aljdewey
Speaking of money and how to discuss with your partner pre-marriage....looks like a good article:
http://www.bankrate.com/BOS/news/advice/20050412a1.asp

and HEE HEE HEE.....look at question #1!

Hysterical!

I got a 100% score for being right.

Is it a sign of the times, or is knowing your future to be credit score necessary? I answered that neither of us knew & they accused me of thinking "love is blind".

We basically knew there wasn''t an issue; but, I''d feel weird if he asked for my credit score visa versa. I''m all for full disclosure; but, maybe I''d draw the line here.

It''s been a while, is this something that people ask now a days.

 

[Momoftwo]

Okay, but, what the OP originally stated was he had no idea what his wife's income was because she wouldn't tell him. That wasn't about separate accounts, etc, but about not telling your spouse your income (keeping a secret from him for whatever reason). I have my own retirement accounts. I've been a stay at home mom with no personal income, but all my DH's at my disposal and now we're working empty nesters and we have always known each other's finances, and for us joint "our" money is the way we've always done it. I think the bigger issue is keeping salaries secret from each other raises red flags for me. But, I pay all the bills and keep the check book so I can record everything and know where we are paycheck to paycheck. My DH says I'm the reason we've had the homes we've had and the one we have now which is our dream home. We do use debit cards and know not to go over a certain amount with each purchase without making sure it's not going to activate the overdraft. There are lots of ways to handle your finances, and they have to work for you, but I have to say keeping your income secret from your spouse is not one of the successful ones I've heard of.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 4/13/2005 1:32:23 PM
Author: aljdewey

Date: 4/13/2005 11:45:59 AM
Author: fire&ice
That''s just it - when you describe your process, my head spins. Doesn''t seem easier - seems like more work than one joint account. Too much to keep up with.

I''ve seen many a fight erupt from couples who share accounts because one didn''t tell the other they took a check, and pandemonium ensues trying to keep the balance straight and keep track of the bookkeeping/check posting. Hubby takes check, doesn''t jot down what it''s for or HOW MUCH, they have to wait for it to clear the bank, etc.

I''ve seen folks with joint accounts each withdraw money with the ATM card, not knowing the other was also withdrawing. One doesn''t keep track of withdrawal slip, and all of the sudden, the account is overdrawn. I could name five or so more scenarios.

al

i agree with you,that''s why i like separate accounts,only i can screw it up.

 

[aljdewey]

I think the horse is dead, eh? We're approaching white-off-rice time.

 

[fire&ice]

Date: 4/13/2005 7

1

6 PM
Author: aljdewey
I think the horse is dead, eh? We''re approaching white-off-rice time.

No, we have not approached wor time.

Seriously, I serious about the whole credit score thing. Who does that? Or is that something that is being done.

Or is it more simple than that.

Though I am serious about the credit score. I don''t know if they still require it - but we had to submit to a VD test. Perhaps they do an aids one now?

 

[flower12]

Date: 4/12/2005 5:15:24 AM
Author:Dancing Fire
what my wife''s annual income is

she keeps it a secret. when i ask ,she say ''don''t worry about it'' and i just ......LOL

it''s good because least she has income. which I don''t

here seems like many people has job,so maybe my case is rare?
I never worked after married. we have 4 dougther''s and one son.( which age 3years - 19 one in college )
I haven''t work is not because I don''t like to work ,its because that''s the our way.
also my husband has lot of day off from work, so we can spend time more together.
however I do play stock sometime and I am very good at. so often I give him big surprise him and put all money in our joint.
I didn''t have any skil about stock even couldn''t understand how to read stock graph till 2 years ago.

I have my own account for long time ,another account we have all joint account .
the my account I save money every month to buy my husband birthday and christmas gift treat dinner etc.
all money come from one but I thought it''s not fun that he can see how much was the gift from bank statment.

I ''ve never ask permission. but whenever I go to shopping,

most time he come witn me or I tell him that ** I am going to shopping tomorrow**

then he would ask me what you ganna buy?
then I say * if I see something I want ,I would buy it

*
or
simply I just show him what I got

he has to see the all fashion show from all of us .
however we talk about what buy for our kid''s if it''s more than $100.
we pretty strict to kid''s about money matter.no spoil

 

[clammer]

My husband and I did the throw it in one big pot thing. Probably the main reason for this is that I''m still in school so I really don''t have the money to pay for much of anything.

We do have seperate credit cards though. When I was younger I wasn''t to smart with my credit and destroyed my FICO score. (Only one more year until all of the bad stuff starts dropping off

) Anyway, once we are added to each others credit cards we become joint holders which in turn can pull down his FICO score because of my low one.