Let's talk bad manners....

[monarch64]

My father has worn a colostomy bag since 2003. He won't travel or go anywhere unfamiliar because of it.

I understand that sometimes people are slobs and just can't/won't be bothered to take care of themselves according to society's standards, but I do try to extend some sympathy towards those who just can't help being what we "normal" citizens deem "offensive." It pains me to read these threads sometimes.

ETA: I think everyone has the right to judge and state their opinion about their ick factors. I don't mean to come into this thread and carry on like I'm above that sort of thing, because I'm certainly not. I do think, though, that the meaning of "manners" is to remain sensitive to others' feelings over and above all else. I am definitely guilty of being insensitive more often than not. This thread has reminded me to mind my manners.

 

[JewelFreak]

JewelFreak - how very bad-mannered of your nephew! I acquired a rude nephew when I got married. He has treated my gifts with such disdain that I no longer bother with him. Once, when I hadn't heard from him after I went to great trouble to send him a set of books, I saw him in England six months later. I asked him if he'd received the books and he didn't even look at me, just said "yes". I just cannot believe that he could possibly have the nerve to say just "yes" - not even "yes thanks". Nasty little boy. I was itching to shove him up the nearest chimney!

I am a full believer in Sartre. Hell is other people.

Fitting punishment, Smith!

For her college graduation I sent my niece garnet earrings that came down from her great-great aunt. Never heard a peep. Months later, asked my brother if they'd arrived: "They're around here somewhere..." My niece PM'd me & wouldn't go away: "I was busy, lots of parties." I told her you thank people for their thought & trouble even if you don't like the gift. "Well, I was really too busy." Then I get an email from my horrid brother: "Leave my daughter alone! She says you're pestering her." Good gawd! Our mother drummed manners into us; obviously didn't take.

I just HATE eating noises. Open-mouth chewing, gulping noises when drinking, scraping the spoon on the dish to get the last drop of soup.

I can't STAND gum chewing! Nobody can do it silently, no matter how quiet they think they are. I can barely stop myself from jamming the icky stuff down their throats!

--- Laurie

 

[justginger]

It takes a lot for me to think someone has poor manners - akin to some of the things Matata mentions.

Loud bodily functions with no apologies
Chewing with mouths open
Letting doors close in faces
Purposefully giving certain individuals the cold shoulder in social situations

Other than that, not much fazes me. I couldn't possibly care less if someone has their feet out their car window. I don't think I've done it due to comfort reasons, but if I did it wouldn't have even crossed my mind that people would find it rude. I don't know, I guess my mind isn't routinely on the behavior of others.

 

[iLander]

Male "adjustments" in public! Yes, you may be in discomfort for a few minutes, but wait to adjust your boys in a restroom or something.

Exactly this!

Or those parents that let their little kids hold their privates in public. Or pick their noses in public. Maybe if the kid is sneaking it, mom doesn't notice, but if the kid is standing in full view, take a second and teach them not to be grabbing that in public. I think even a two-year-old can be told to put their hands down at their sides, at least while you're being "introduced" to the little darlings.

 

[soxfan]

OMG our best friends are ALWAYS late. Not 5 minutes, not 15 minutes, not 30 minutes. They were an hour late to THANKSGIVING once. And they NEVER apologize. It's the weirdest thing EVER. I'll be waiting here for her to go on a bike ride. I'll call because she's late and she'll say "Oh DH decided to wash my car." Um, I don't give a F*** about your car. I have a window in which to do a 2 hour bike ride! How rude.

It seriously drives me absofreakinglutely insane. I don't know whether it's her or her husband who is a total wing nut. Sometimes I have to take breaks from them.

My body temperature went up just writing this.

 

[Smith1942]

Soxfan, that is incredibly rude! Does one of them have ADD? When we were dating, my husband would be an hour late to the restaurant and not even mention it, jut breeze in like nothing had happened. He has ADD and often just literally loses track of time. It's the only thing I can think of that might excuse such dreadful behaviour.

JewelFreak, that defies belief about your niece. What a pity the family earrings went to such an ungrateful home. I just cannot believe that there are parents out there who think their kid has no need to thank someone for a gift.

Ilander - kids grabbing their private parts in public?? I've never seen that. How odd!!

I think I am the person who scrapes every last bit of soup. It's just because I'm enjoying it.

 

[momhappy]

The ultimate display of bad manners occurred over the summer at one of our favorite restaurants. We were eating in the outdoor dining space, which is a combination of free-standing tables and long, community picnic tables. My husband and I grabbed a table and seated next to us was a table of what appeared to be new-ish moms having lunch together. All of a sudden, one of the moms starts pulling out her diaper changing stuff (mat, diaper, wipes, etc.) and we figured that she would get up and walk to the restroom. She lays her infant down on the bench of the picnic table (baby butt facing us) and proceeds to change a poop diaper right in the middle of lunch!!! I have seen a lot of bad manners, but that one left my jaw on the ground for a good 15 minutes before I could go back to eating my lunch again. I really wanted to say something to her (something along the lines of, "I have young children myself and am very tolerant, but that was horribly unpleasant for people having lunch...."), but I didn't want to cause a scene and most of us were simply too stunned to even react...

 

[Matata]

Having sex on an airplane. I almost forgot about this one until I read the court decision in the paper this morning. One of our local vintners and his girlfriend had sex in their seats on a flight to Las Vegas a few months ago. At first they were puzzled about why the other passengers objected.

 

[soxfan]

Having sex on an airplane. I almost forgot about this one until I read the court decision in the paper this morning. One of our local vintners and his girlfriend had sex in their seats on a flight to Las Vegas a few months ago. At first they were puzzled about why the other passengers objected.

no way.

 

[soxfan]

Soxfan, that is incredibly rude! Does one of them have ADD? When we were dating, my husband would be an hour late to the restaurant and not even mention it, jut breeze in like nothing had happened. He has ADD and often just literally loses track of time. It's the only thing I can think of that might excuse such dreadful behaviour.

I think he does!

 

[Dancing Fire]

Having sex on an airplane. I almost forgot about this one until I read the court decision in the paper this morning. One of our local vintners and his girlfriend had sex in their seats on a flight to Las Vegas a few months ago. At first they were puzzled about why the other passengers objected.

no way.

not possible!.. who was on top?

 

[msop04]

OMG our best friends are ALWAYS late. Not 5 minutes, not 15 minutes, not 30 minutes. They were an hour late to THANKSGIVING once. And they NEVER apologize. It's the weirdest thing EVER. I'll be waiting here for her to go on a bike ride. I'll call because she's late and she'll say "Oh DH decided to wash my car." Um, I don't give a F*** about your car. I have a window in which to do a 2 hour bike ride! How rude.

It seriously drives me absofreakinglutely insane. I don't know whether it's her or her husband who is a total wing nut. Sometimes I have to take breaks from them.

My body temperature went up just writing this.

I feel your pain on this one, sox... I have a friend who is notoriously late -- like 2-3 hours late at times. Our group of friends has gone so far as to give her totally different times for events. Once when we wanted to meet at 7 for dinner, we told her to "make sure to be there by 5:30"... she arrived at 7:40, apologizing, but half way laughing as if to say, "...you know meeee!!!"

I had always gotten mad, looked over it, then got over it until... DH came on the scene. He refused to put up with her tardiness, and made me more aware that I shouldn't either. We'd plan to meet at our favorite sports bar for dinner at 6:30 and she'd start texting me about 6:47 saying that she was in her car and on the way. We'd know she was lying, since her house is less than 10 minutes away in traffic and she did this all the time (saying she's somewhere when we know she isn't). That night we decided that we would go ahead and have our dinner with or without her. We had paid the tab and were walking to our car when we notice that she's sitting in her car ON THE DAMN PHONE. She sees us, holds up her index finger as if to say, "wait a second," and we just waive and leave. After all that, can you believe she sends me an irritable text message saying she can't believe we just left??!! She was mad at us!! HA!! Now that was rich. This is how we've handled each instance since, and there haven't been many since we hardly talk, much less hang out anymore. We're friendly, but she knows we won't put up with her sh!t, so I guess she doesn't bother anymore.

Another instance (before I met DH) was when we were scheduled to fly to Jamaica for a friend's wedding. I had made it very clear that we had to leave at 1:00 AM to make it to Atlanta for our flight. I reminded this chick at least 10 times - and I'm not exaggerating -- I'd been sending texts and talking on the phone with her the entire day because I feared she wouldn't be ready. Got to her house, called her to bring her bags... her response -- "I just got out of the shower." I told her she had 10 minutes to get out to my car or I was leaving her. She did her usual crapping around, so I went in after 10 minutes to help her carry her luggage. She hadn't even started packing!! Her stuff was literally laying everywhere on the floor!! I was livid. I went back to my car, got her ticket, and put it on her coffee table, telling her that she could be late, but I wasn't missing my flight because of her lack of respect. She started crying and swearing she'd be ready in 10 minutes... I knew that was a lie as well. I gave in though because I really didn't want to drive to the airport alone. I grabbed all of her stuff.. and threw it in her bag in a matter of less than a minute -- she was putting makeup on. REALLY??? ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??? I grabbed her makeup and put it in her carry-on and expressed that this was her last chance to ride with me to the airport because it was 1:30 now and we were gonna be pushing it. She was so pissed off, but she got up and left. We don't travel together anymore. Actually, she turned down the annual "girls trip" to the USVI the next year because no one would partner up with her. Can't say that I blame them one bit.

Did I mention that over 2 years ago she had been warned that if she's late for work "one more time" she'd be terminated. She was 30 minutes late the very. next. day... and continues to breeze in 15-45 minutes late almost daily (according to mutual friends). I still don't know how she has her job. It's baffling, to say the least.

Sorry for the long drawn out story... just typing it gets my heart racing again! HA!

Making a habit of being extremely late is disrepectful to everyone -- BAD MANNERS!!

 

[msop04]

Having sex on an airplane. I almost forgot about this one until I read the court decision in the paper this morning. One of our local vintners and his girlfriend had sex in their seats on a flight to Las Vegas a few months ago. At first they were puzzled about why the other passengers objected.

WHOA!!! LOL

 

[canuk-gal]

Having sex on an airplane. I almost forgot about this one until I read the court decision in the paper this morning. One of our local vintners and his girlfriend had sex in their seats on a flight to Las Vegas a few months ago. At first they were puzzled about why the other passengers objected.

Matata:

I know you have a good glass now and then...is this one of the vendors you "enjoy"?

Please provide a link to the article...as a wine drinker I feel the need to be informed....

cheers --Sharon

 

[missy]

OMG our best friends are ALWAYS late. Not 5 minutes, not 15 minutes, not 30 minutes. They were an hour late to THANKSGIVING once. And they NEVER apologize. It's the weirdest thing EVER. I'll be waiting here for her to go on a bike ride. I'll call because she's late and she'll say "Oh DH decided to wash my car." Um, I don't give a F*** about your car. I have a window in which to do a 2 hour bike ride! How rude.

It seriously drives me absofreakinglutely insane. I don't know whether it's her or her husband who is a total wing nut. Sometimes I have to take breaks from them.

My body temperature went up just writing this.

I feel your pain on this one, sox... I have a friend who is notoriously late -- like 2-3 hours late at times. Our group of friends has gone so far as to give her totally different times for events. Once when we wanted to meet at 7 for dinner, we told her to "make sure to be there by 5:30"... she arrived at 7:40, apologizing, but half way laughing as if to say, "...you know meeee!!!"

I had always gotten mad, looked over it, then got over it until... DH came on the scene. He refused to put up with her tardiness, and made me more aware that I shouldn't either. We'd plan to meet at our favorite sports bar for dinner at 6:30 and she'd start texting me about 6:47 saying that she was in her car and on the way. We'd know she was lying, since her house is less than 10 minutes away in traffic and she did this all the time (saying she's somewhere when we know she isn't). That night we decided that we would go ahead and have our dinner with or without her. We had paid the tab and were walking to our car when we notice that she's sitting in her car ON THE DAMN PHONE. She sees us, holds up her index finger as if to say, "wait a second," and we just waive and leave. After all that, can you believe she sends me an irritable text message saying she can't believe we just left??!! She was mad at us!! HA!! Now that was rich. This is how we've handled each instance since, and there haven't been many since we hardly talk, much less hang out anymore. We're friendly, but she knows we won't put up with her sh!t, so I guess she doesn't bother anymore.

Another instance (before I met DH) was when we were scheduled to fly to Jamaica for a friend's wedding. I had made it very clear that we had to leave at 1:00 AM to make it to Atlanta for our flight. I reminded this chick at least 10 times - and I'm not exaggerating -- I'd been sending texts and talking on the phone with her the entire day because I feared she wouldn't be ready. Got to her house, called her to bring her bags... her response -- "I just got out of the shower." I told her she had 10 minutes to get out to my car or I was leaving her. She did her usual crapping around, so I went in after 10 minutes to help her carry her luggage. She hadn't even started packing!! Her stuff was literally laying everywhere on the floor!! I was livid. I went back to my car, got her ticket, and put it on her coffee table, telling her that she could be late, but I wasn't missing my flight because of her lack of respect. She started crying and swearing she'd be ready in 10 minutes... I knew that was a lie as well. I gave in though because I really didn't want to drive to the airport alone. I grabbed all of her stuff.. and threw it in her bag in a matter of less than a minute -- she was putting makeup on. REALLY??? ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??? I grabbed her makeup and put it in her carry-on and expressed that this was her last chance to ride with me to the airport because it was 1:30 now and we were gonna be pushing it. She was so pissed off, but she got up and left. We don't travel together anymore. Actually, she turned down the annual "girls trip" to the USVI the next year because no one would partner up with her. Can't say that I blame them one bit.

Did I mention that over 2 years ago she had been warned that if she's late for work "one more time" she'd be terminated. She was 30 minutes late the very. next. day... and continues to breeze in 15-45 minutes late almost daily (according to mutual friends). I still don't know how she has her job. It's baffling, to say the least.

Sorry for the long drawn out story... just typing it gets my heart racing again! HA!

Making a habit of being extremely late is disrepectful to everyone -- BAD MANNERS!!

I do not put up with that type of behavior. If someone is late rarely OK I understand that. But for someone who is chronically late that's a real problem for me and I no longer make dates to get together with people like this. It shows a lack of respect for other people's time IMO. They are the center of the universe and their time is more critical than anyone else's. No thank you. People who know me know that being on time is important to me so they respect that. I only had a real issue with one good friend and the way I handle that issue is we never meet anywhere like a restaurant or museum but instead I go there or she comes to us which is fine because we are already entertaining others so not just sitting around waiting for her. I have to say though she has improved greatly. We had a gathering of friends over to the beach house 2 weeks ago and she was only 20 minutes late which is amazing considering we are about 90 minutes away from her home! I think she didn't want to miss out on the action LOL.

In any case people who are chronically late is a big pet peeve of mine and absolutely rude behavior and bad manners.

I agree with many of the other posters here on other bad manners with special attention to those who don't move away from subway doors to let one exit. People who try to push onto the subway before allowing others to exit. People who don't hold the door open for you if you are right behind them. People who stop in the middle of the street/subway stairs/anywhere there is a flow of traffic etc to text/speak on the phone etc. Rude rude rude. Why do they think they are the center of the universe? That is where a lot of bad behavior originates from IMO. People who are under the misimpression that they are the center of the universe.

So many bad manners all around but I try not to let it affect my mood. Bad manners reflect poorly on the person exhibiting them and nobody else. Though it can be a challenge at times. Thank you, please, you're welcome and thank you again. Not so difficult to say and mean but it escapes so many.

 

[Matata]

Matata:

I know you have a good glass now and then...is this one of the vendors you "enjoy"?

Please provide a link to the article...as a wine drinker I feel the need to be informed....

cheers --Sharon

Here ya go: http://www.mailtribune.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20131017/NEWS/310170329

Druids Fluid, a mixed varietal red that Troon produces, is luscious.

 

[Maria D]

...She lays her infant down on the bench of the picnic table (baby butt facing us) and proceeds to change a poop diaper right in the middle of lunch!!! ...

EEEEWWWWWWW! I once saw someone do a diaper change on the bench of a booth at a fast-food restaurant and thought that was bad enough - and it wasn't even a poopy one!

I can't stand when people don't take the earbud out of their ear before initiating a conversation with me. OK, it's not just "people" it's students. Some of them walk around with at least one earbud in whenever they can get away with it. I don't allow it in class but for some reason they think this rule doesn't extend to outside of regular class time. It drives me nuts!

When I call them on it, they will actually say - it's on low, I can still hear you. Oh, that's just great, I'm SO GLAD you can still hear me! Since you are disrupting my personal work time in order to get help with something you don't understand, it would be a damn shame if you couldn't hear my response. Not that you should be concerned about giving it your complete attention, no. It's just fine to have a low-volume party in your head because it's just math YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND here, nothing too complicated. I mean, you can probably give the barista your caffe latte order while listening to Ke$ha (or whatever the hell) so why not my little vignette about tangents to curves at a point?

I've taken to just saying what? what??? when approached by an earbudded student. When they finally get the hint I tell them I have a rare affliction (only one in 7 billion have it) that causes me to lose MY hearing when trying to speak to someone wearing an earbud!

edited to clarify: I think they should be giving the barista their full attention too! Manners people!

 

[JewelFreak]

Sheesh! "I'm going to learn from this...?" Maybe he was once one of the kids iLander met, holding his privates.

I think I am the person who scrapes every last bit of soup. It's just because I'm enjoying it.

I meant people who make a big noise scraping away on the bottom of the dish (like my DH). I like to get the last drop too, but my mommy made me do it without making any noise.

I go nuts when people enter a store & stand oblivious right in the doorway -- looking around...("now why am I here, again?"). MOVE! Then figure it out. Makes me cray-cray.

 

[lovebug1031]

ohhhh i'm guilty of so many of these :/

the two biggies:

i'm a shoes off legs crosssed in the bench kind of person, i sit at work like this too...i HATE shoes and i'm too short for my feet to touch the ground most of the time, it's annoying!

i'm a CONSTANT sniffler, like all year round - I've been like this since I was a kid, i've been to dr's who have been no help. It's embarrassing; I've been asked more times than I can count if I snort coke. And when asked, I usually tell people it's the weather change or some other thing...

 

[soxfan]

ohhhh i'm guilty of so many of these :/


i'm a CONSTANT sniffler, like all year round - I've been like this since I was a kid, i've been to dr's who have been no help. It's embarrassing; I've been asked more times than I can count if I snort coke. And when asked, I usually tell people it's the weather change or some other thing...

OMGGGGGGG!!! Me too! I think it's kind of slight tourette's thing! Although I did used to do a lot of coke? When I was WAY younger....don't judge. I HAVE heard that can stick with you. Comments I get:

"Are your allergies bothering you?" "Do you have a cold?" "Why the F*** do you keep sniffing?"

 

[soxfan]

OMG our best friends are ALWAYS late. Not 5 minutes, not 15 minutes, not 30 minutes. They were an hour late to THANKSGIVING once. And they NEVER apologize. It's the weirdest thing EVER. I'll be waiting here for her to go on a bike ride. I'll call because she's late and she'll say "Oh DH decided to wash my car." Um, I don't give a F*** about your car. I have a window in which to do a 2 hour bike ride! How rude.

It seriously drives me absofreakinglutely insane. I don't know whether it's her or her husband who is a total wing nut. Sometimes I have to take breaks from them.

My body temperature went up just writing this.

I feel your pain on this one, sox... I have a friend who is notoriously late -- like 2-3 hours late at times. Our group of friends has gone so far as to give her totally different times for events. Once when we wanted to meet at 7 for dinner, we told her to "make sure to be there by 5:30"... she arrived at 7:40, apologizing, but half way laughing as if to say, "...you know meeee!!!"

I had always gotten mad, looked over it, then got over it until... DH came on the scene. He refused to put up with her tardiness, and made me more aware that I shouldn't either. We'd plan to meet at our favorite sports bar for dinner at 6:30 and she'd start texting me about 6:47 saying that she was in her car and on the way. We'd know she was lying, since her house is less than 10 minutes away in traffic and she did this all the time (saying she's somewhere when we know she isn't). That night we decided that we would go ahead and have our dinner with or without her. We had paid the tab and were walking to our car when we notice that she's sitting in her car ON THE DAMN PHONE. She sees us, holds up her index finger as if to say, "wait a second," and we just waive and leave. After all that, can you believe she sends me an irritable text message saying she can't believe we just left??!! She was mad at us!! HA!! Now that was rich. This is how we've handled each instance since, and there haven't been many since we hardly talk, much less hang out anymore. We're friendly, but she knows we won't put up with her sh!t, so I guess she doesn't bother anymore.

Another instance (before I met DH) was when we were scheduled to fly to Jamaica for a friend's wedding. I had made it very clear that we had to leave at 1:00 AM to make it to Atlanta for our flight. I reminded this chick at least 10 times - and I'm not exaggerating -- I'd been sending texts and talking on the phone with her the entire day because I feared she wouldn't be ready. Got to her house, called her to bring her bags... her response -- "I just got out of the shower." I told her she had 10 minutes to get out to my car or I was leaving her. She did her usual crapping around, so I went in after 10 minutes to help her carry her luggage. She hadn't even started packing!! Her stuff was literally laying everywhere on the floor!! I was livid. I went back to my car, got her ticket, and put it on her coffee table, telling her that she could be late, but I wasn't missing my flight because of her lack of respect. She started crying and swearing she'd be ready in 10 minutes... I knew that was a lie as well. I gave in though because I really didn't want to drive to the airport alone. I grabbed all of her stuff.. and threw it in her bag in a matter of less than a minute -- she was putting makeup on. REALLY??? ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??? I grabbed her makeup and put it in her carry-on and expressed that this was her last chance to ride with me to the airport because it was 1:30 now and we were gonna be pushing it. She was so pissed off, but she got up and left. We don't travel together anymore. Actually, she turned down the annual "girls trip" to the USVI the next year because no one would partner up with her. Can't say that I blame them one bit.

Did I mention that over 2 years ago she had been warned that if she's late for work "one more time" she'd be terminated. She was 30 minutes late the very. next. day... and continues to breeze in 15-45 minutes late almost daily (according to mutual friends). I still don't know how she has her job. It's baffling, to say the least.

Sorry for the long drawn out story... just typing it gets my heart racing again! HA!

Making a habit of being extremely late is disrepectful to everyone -- BAD MANNERS!!

Ugh. I know. I just thought about this and they are late to other functions as well. SO disrespectful. I NEED to start just leaving and not waiting. Make them feel uncomfortable that we are all eating when they show up. It pisses me off SOOO much.

 

[soxfan]

OMG our best friends are ALWAYS late. Not 5 minutes, not 15 minutes, not 30 minutes. They were an hour late to THANKSGIVING once. And they NEVER apologize. It's the weirdest thing EVER. I'll be waiting here for her to go on a bike ride. I'll call because she's late and she'll say "Oh DH decided to wash my car." Um, I don't give a F*** about your car. I have a window in which to do a 2 hour bike ride! How rude.

It seriously drives me absofreakinglutely insane. I don't know whether it's her or her husband who is a total wing nut. Sometimes I have to take breaks from them.

My body temperature went up just writing this.

I feel your pain on this one, sox... I have a friend who is notoriously late -- like 2-3 hours late at times. Our group of friends has gone so far as to give her totally different times for events. Once when we wanted to meet at 7 for dinner, we told her to "make sure to be there by 5:30"... she arrived at 7:40, apologizing, but half way laughing as if to say, "...you know meeee!!!"

I had always gotten mad, looked over it, then got over it until... DH came on the scene. He refused to put up with her tardiness, and made me more aware that I shouldn't either. We'd plan to meet at our favorite sports bar for dinner at 6:30 and she'd start texting me about 6:47 saying that she was in her car and on the way. We'd know she was lying, since her house is less than 10 minutes away in traffic and she did this all the time (saying she's somewhere when we know she isn't). That night we decided that we would go ahead and have our dinner with or without her. We had paid the tab and were walking to our car when we notice that she's sitting in her car ON THE DAMN PHONE. She sees us, holds up her index finger as if to say, "wait a second," and we just waive and leave. After all that, can you believe she sends me an irritable text message saying she can't believe we just left??!! She was mad at us!! HA!! Now that was rich. This is how we've handled each instance since, and there haven't been many since we hardly talk, much less hang out anymore. We're friendly, but she knows we won't put up with her sh!t, so I guess she doesn't bother anymore.

Another instance (before I met DH) was when we were scheduled to fly to Jamaica for a friend's wedding. I had made it very clear that we had to leave at 1:00 AM to make it to Atlanta for our flight. I reminded this chick at least 10 times - and I'm not exaggerating -- I'd been sending texts and talking on the phone with her the entire day because I feared she wouldn't be ready. Got to her house, called her to bring her bags... her response -- "I just got out of the shower." I told her she had 10 minutes to get out to my car or I was leaving her. She did her usual crapping around, so I went in after 10 minutes to help her carry her luggage. She hadn't even started packing!! Her stuff was literally laying everywhere on the floor!! I was livid. I went back to my car, got her ticket, and put it on her coffee table, telling her that she could be late, but I wasn't missing my flight because of her lack of respect. She started crying and swearing she'd be ready in 10 minutes... I knew that was a lie as well. I gave in though because I really didn't want to drive to the airport alone. I grabbed all of her stuff.. and threw it in her bag in a matter of less than a minute -- she was putting makeup on. REALLY??? ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME??? I grabbed her makeup and put it in her carry-on and expressed that this was her last chance to ride with me to the airport because it was 1:30 now and we were gonna be pushing it. She was so pissed off, but she got up and left. We don't travel together anymore. Actually, she turned down the annual "girls trip" to the USVI the next year because no one would partner up with her. Can't say that I blame them one bit.

Did I mention that over 2 years ago she had been warned that if she's late for work "one more time" she'd be terminated. She was 30 minutes late the very. next. day... and continues to breeze in 15-45 minutes late almost daily (according to mutual friends). I still don't know how she has her job. It's baffling, to say the least.

Sorry for the long drawn out story... just typing it gets my heart racing again! HA!

Making a habit of being extremely late is disrepectful to everyone -- BAD MANNERS!!

I do not put up with that type of behavior. If someone is late rarely OK I understand that. But for someone who is chronically late that's a real problem for me and I no longer make dates to get together with people like this. It shows a lack of respect for other people's time IMO. They are the center of the universe and their time is more critical than anyone else's. No thank you. People who know me know that being on time is important to me so they respect that. I only had a real issue with one good friend and the way I handle that issue is we never meet anywhere like a restaurant or museum but instead I go there or she comes to us which is fine because we are already entertaining others so not just sitting around waiting for her. I have to say though she has improved greatly. We had a gathering of friends over to the beach house 2 weeks ago and she was only 20 minutes late which is amazing considering we are about 90 minutes away from her home! I think she didn't want to miss out on the action LOL.

In any case people who are chronically late is a big pet peeve of mine and absolutely rude behavior and bad manners.

I agree with many of the other posters here on other bad manners with special attention to those who don't move away from subway doors to let one exit. People who try to push onto the subway before allowing others to exit. People who don't hold the door open for you if you are right behind them. People who stop in the middle of the street/subway stairs/anywhere there is a flow of traffic etc to text/speak on the phone etc. Rude rude rude. Why do they think they are the center of the universe? That is where a lot of bad behavior originates from IMO. People who are under the misimpression that they are the center of the universe.

So many bad manners all around but I try not to let it affect my mood. Bad manners reflect poorly on the person exhibiting them and nobody else. Though it can be a challenge at times. Thank you, please, you're welcome and thank you again. Not so difficult to say and mean but it escapes so many.

See, and I feel like a jerk mentioning it!?!?!?! And I shouldn't. I should say "listen, I'm not waiting around for you for an hour." But I can't.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

oh, I better not even start listing as I'd run out panties pretty damn quick!

 

[MichelleCarmen]

A couple quickies:

People not replying to text messages, but then you see them texting other people.

Friends who sign up to sell products and then try to hook you up on the crap.

 

[missy]

A couple quickies:

People not replying to text messages, but then you see them texting other people.

Friends who sign up to sell products and then try to hook you up on the crap.

MC, How about friends who send you chain emails? Ugh, no thanks!

Also, not sure if anyone mentioned people who speak loudly on mobile phones while they are in (quiet) public small spaces. Like on the train, in a restaurant or coffee shop, bookstore, etc. Again, not the center of the universe so please have respect for others...I hate hearing other people's too loud conversations especially when I cannot easily escape.

Soxfan, why can't you just tell your friend that you don't want to wait an hour for her? That you have more interesting and important things to do with your time than just hang around waiting for someone who is so late? It is possible to say it nicely and politely and still make your point heard. Do it girl-you will feel better!

 

[JewelFreak]

Missy's right, Sox; if you do it once, you'll feel better & maybe she'll think about her behavior. It's so disrespectful! It says, "Your time isn't important enough for me to bother about." Tell her you will wait 10 minutes, then get up & go on with your day. Wish I could hold your hand & help you!

Loud conversations on cellphones -- I agree, ick! Once I walked about 3 city blocks in front of a man having a noisy angry argument with his wife & MIL on his phone. I (& everybody else within half a mile) heard how he felt about them both -- not friendly! -- and the situation that set him off. I almost turned around & said, "Hey, Buster, go home & settle it. Sheesh!" Good example for me of how not to do it.

Chain emails -- I get many religious ones from a couple of friends. I don't share their religion but they never asked. Do not want to hurt their feelings, so I just zap them, but it makes me sigh. I wouldn't send political or religious emails to anyone whose outlook I wasn't sure of.

MC -- people who invite me to "parties" that are really sales pitches. No no no! I always send regrets (without regret ).

 

[Sky56]

People who talk during concerts

Feet on the dashboard - I do it as a passenger in my own car when my legs hurt

 

[lovebug1031]

ohhhh i'm guilty of so many of these :/


i'm a CONSTANT sniffler, like all year round - I've been like this since I was a kid, i've been to dr's who have been no help. It's embarrassing; I've been asked more times than I can count if I snort coke. And when asked, I usually tell people it's the weather change or some other thing...

OMGGGGGGG!!! Me too! I think it's kind of slight tourette's thing! Although I did used to do a lot of coke? When I was WAY younger....don't judge. I HAVE heard that can stick with you. Comments I get:

"Are your allergies bothering you?" "Do you have a cold?" "Why the F*** do you keep sniffing?"

I'm glad i'm not the only person - it's SO frustrating. No, I can't just STOP - I have a constant runny nose! This also makes me constantly clear my throat! Hmm maybe it'll qualify me to get a nose job lol

 

[msop04]

...I only had a real issue with one good friend and the way I handle that issue is we never meet anywhere like a restaurant or museum but instead I go there or she comes to us which is fine because we are already entertaining others so not just sitting around waiting for her. I have to say though she has improved greatly. We had a gathering of friends over to the beach house 2 weeks ago and she was only 20 minutes late which is amazing considering we are about 90 minutes away from her home! I think she didn't want to miss out on the action LOL.

In any case people who are chronically late is a big pet peeve of mine and absolutely rude behavior and bad manners.

You are absolutely right, missy... it is sooo disrespectful to be late like that. I like the way you handled your friend, and I'm glad she's getting better. Unfortunately, we've tried similar things (never meet just her... always others involved) and the friend in question was still just as late -- once never showed because she "couldn't find it." **she brother works two blocks down from the venue** But, ya know what's funny is that she's never late to a concert she wants to go to -- key word "wants." We finally came to the conclusion that we just weren't high enough on her priority list of "wants" to give a sh!t. So, instead of being angry, we'll casually invite her (and she always accepts, saying she'll be there and "can't wait"), but it's just understood that she won't show. We don't even set a place for her at dinner or count her in our guest list... why waste our time and effort when she has shown she'll put absolutely zero effort into us, KWIM?

We just laugh about it now... better than being upset, I guess!

 

[msop04]

Ugh. I know. I just thought about this and they are late to other functions as well. SO disrespectful. I NEED to start just leaving and not waiting. Make them feel uncomfortable that we are all eating when they show up. It pisses me off SOOO much.
See, and I feel like a jerk mentioning it!?!?!?! And I shouldn't. I should say "listen, I'm not waiting around for you for an hour." But I can't.

I felt the same way for so long... I put up with it until DH flat out refused to... glad he had the guts when I didn't! The best thing for me was not doing anything "just us." If she wants to meet for dinner at our old go-to sports bar, I just say I have plans -- even though I may really be craving it!

The only way I'll go is if she's already there and can prove it by letting me talk to one of our bartender buddies (okay, I know that sounds juvenile, but she's lied about this several times, then I get there and she's "just down the road"... 45 minutes later, she may show -- and I'm pissed all over again -- viscious cycle!!) By getting out of it altogether, it saves me the frustration of getting my hopes up and expecting a different outcome, when I know I'll just be disappointed... yet again. We hardly ever hang out anymore, and I know she'd like to say it's because I'm married and ignoring her... but the fact of the matter is I've tried numerous times to get together, but she can never commit to a time frame to meet. I'll say okay and she'll want to meet at 6:00. I agree that we can meet, but only if she can be there between 6:00 and 7:00 -- I mean, that's an hour window!! (I won't wait, but I'll just come when she calls asking where I am -- that's literally how close it is to our homes). She'll say she can't do it and starts making excuses, "...welllll, it maaaay be like 6:45 or so..." which I know means that she won't even start getting ready til 7:20... AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. So, I say "okay, not tonight then..." and we don't hang out.

BTW, this is one of the two friends that I invited to my wedding in Mexico. She came with the other girl (who is always early, go figure! HA), but couldn't seem to make it to my reception IN OUR HOMETOWN and less than 15 minutes away from her house... on her weekend off. I got a text the next day with her saying, "I understand if you hate me..." blah blah BS blah... I simply texted back, "I don't hate you at all -- I'm not surprised or mad." and I just left it at that. [shrugs]