getting lost in stupid stuff

[antiquesparkler]

Saving your whole post. Thank you! That helps tons!

The places that we have looked into in the Florida Keys all seem really great about a back-up plan/rescheduling so I am okay with the wonky weather. April actually would be really great for us because I might actually be able to pull that off by this upcoming April. Then we could do our party/BBQ that summer.

We are also debating cruise ship... but the beach wedding packages are EXPENSIVE! eeek.

Did you get an elopement package? What does it include? If you dont mind me asking.

 

[audball]

AS -- I'm happy to help! I think April is a great choice to have warm weather that isn't unbearably hot, lesser chances of rain...it gets my vote! And the summer BBQ for afterwards sounds perfect!

Cruise ships I think would be less personal since your'e in confined space with so many people. Not to mention, expensive! Unless you have big bucks to spend on a bigger/more luxurious state room, you end up not having as nice lodging as you can do if you were at a hotel or B&B.

For our elopement, we did book an elopement package. We decided to elope in Savannah, GA at The Kehoe House Inn and the package cost is $1,199 +tax.

Their elopement package includes:
--2 nights stay in one of their highest class rooms. We added an additional night to the package to extend our trip to 4 days/3 nights. Unfortunately we can't take a longer trip because FI has very limited leave for the first year at his new job and we didn't want to wait another year just to have a longer honeymoon. We'll take a long 1st anniversary trip or something instead!

--Ceremony location and time. There are 4 ceremony locations to choose from, two indoors and two outdoors. The indoor options are in their Parlor in front of the fireplace or in their Music Room with a grand piano. The outdoor options are in their small garden or on the covered verandah overlooking Columbia Square. Depending on which you choose dictates the times they'll permit because they try to minimize other guest traffic to keep your ceremony as private as possible. In addition, you can book Colubmia Square which is directly across the street from the city, but that's an extra cost.

--An officiant of choice between a Justice of the Peace or clergy from your requested religion. We are religious, but we wanted to be able to customize and personalize our ceremony so they Inn recommend the JOP because he's very open to that. So we picked him and he helped us make the ceremony totally us so we're glad we went with him!

--8" petite wedding cake in your choice of cake/icing flavors and decorating style. This is served with a bottle of champagne after the ceremony and with 2 keepsake toasting flutes to take home.

--Bouquet of 1 dozen roses in your choice of color (any color you could think of practically...) for the bride with matching bout for the groom. I'm not a big fan of roses and they have the option to work directly with their florist to choose something else. If what you choose is less or equal in cost to the included flowers, they do it for no charge. If it's more, you just pay the difference directly to the florist. We changed our flowers, but selected something that didn't incur an up charge.

--1 hour horse drawn carriage ride/tour around the city. You can schedule this any day during your stay, but most people (including us) choose to do it right after the ceremony and your pictures so that your photographer can get shots of you leaving on the carriage ride. They also will coordinate the carriage to drop you off at a restaurant of your choosing for your wedding dinner. The dinner isn't included, but they take care of making all of the arrangements and if you choose one of their recommended restaurants, the restaurants kind of go all out to set you up really special for your wedding dinner.

--Wedding night turndown service with another bottle of chilled champagne and chocolate covered strawberries in your room for when you return after dinner!

--Breakfast served in your room. You can opt to eat in the dining room with the other guests, but breakfast in bed sounds more romantic. They actually have menu choices too which I was pretty impressed with. I was happy to see that we'll have choices and it's not just whatever they prepare in bulk that morning!

All in all, it included everything we needed/wanted except a photographer and hair/makeup. Which made me quite happy so we could choose our own! I booked the photographer separately and booked hair/makeup to be done the morning of the wedding. We're so flipping excited. Sorry if that was more than you wanted to read!

 

[LoveLikeCrazy]

TP, sorry about all the real life stuff sounds like the wedding stuff is coming along though!

AS, welcome to team elope! Aud and I are the highly vocal members haha. I was originally planning a Florida mini wedding wth close friends and fam (st Pete area), but ultimately decided to do a true elopement in Jamaica!

Aud, your posts are always so well written and thoughtful. I am from the "north" and hate your summers. Lol. My fave times to travel to FL are march-may and oct-dec.

 

[audball]

Go Team ELOPE!

Thank you for your sweet comments, LLC! I try to post things that are helpful when I have the time to sit down and think things out! My favorite times are October-February and occasionally that stretches into March/April during years where "winter" is lingering. I despise May-September.

 

[audball]

Got some stuff done tonight preemptively for the weekend. I'll be out of town this weekend for my sister's wedding and the weekend is usually when we knock some things off the list.

So this afternoon, I finally made some decisions, confirmed with FI, and placed some orders.

Added to the done list:
Purchased clutch
Purchased stationary (small cards/envelopes) to write vows on for ceremony and to have as a keepsake

My hair accessory came in and it was damaged. Seller was great, but after playing with it, I decided to exchange for a different style anyway. She should get my return this weekend and new one (different style) will be sent out next week. I also ordered a small birdcage veil that I may use with the hair comb. I'm still undecided on the veil front but have been wondering lately if I'll regret not having something a bit more "bridal" in my hair so I found an inexpensive one so that I'll have the option!

I also contacted an alterations person to see about timeline on getting my dress done. If I don't hear from her by early next week, I'll call (I sent an inquiry from her website).

Moved back to in progress from done:
Purchase bridal hair accessory (exchange in process)
Get dress altered (will wait until late Sept/early Oct)

DONE:
His wedding band
Her wedding band
Her dress
His suit/shirt/tie
Booked hair/makeup for day of
Booked elopement package
Booked additional nights stay
Selected officiant
Selected cake style/flavors
Purchased cake topper supplies
Booked dinner reservations for wedding dinner
Booked photographer
Ordered flower selections
Wrote personal vows
Finalized ceremony script and got it approved by the officiant
Purchased bridal shoes
Scheduled engagement pictures
Purchased new point and shoot camera for trip
Purchased garment bags to transport wedding outfits
Purchased outfits for engagement pictures
Purchased clutch
Purchased stationary (small cards/envelopes) to write vows on for ceremony and to have as a keepsake

IN PROGRESS:
Assemble/finish cake topper
Purchase/borrow/select bridal jewelry
Purchase bridal hair accessory (exchange in process)
Get dress altered (will wait until late Sept/early Oct)

TO DO:
Purchase fun socks for Groom
Purchase undergarments for dress
Select wedding first dance song and purchase for day of
Make spa appointments (mani/pedi, etc) (will make in early-mid Oct)
MARRIAGE LICENSE (will make apt in early Oct for day before wedding)

 

[TooPatient]

Aud -- Your package sounds amazing! Carriage rides and wine


E-pics Monday. No idea what we're wearing. Have to look for stuff. May need to buy?

Tax prep guy has to have our tax info by TODAY or he can't promise to have them done in time.

FI is slowly getting better but still not able to do much.

Yom Kippur starts at sundown tonight so I've been up for over an hour getting dinner going (started at 6am )
Shabbat also starts so I have to bake bread too.

The company FI works for switched how they do insurance so the processing is SUPER slow. According to the health insurance company, he has not gotten ANY treatment for his neck/back since leaving work almost two months ago.
The short term disability insurance company checks with the health insurance first to verify treatments (supposed to be they check those records, decide the disability is real, then approve in a matter of a few days to a week) but the health insurance says he has had NO treatments. The STD people had to request records directly from the drs we've been working with so there has been massive delay. In the mean time, the company stops ALL pay until the STD insurance makes a decision! So he should have been paid today but it didn't come in.... but that is "okay" (according to HR) because they'll just add it to the next paycheck.

Except that today is 9/13. Our mortgage is due 9/15. All remaining balances to the winery are due 9/17.
I've got a request in to move money from another account so we'll be able to cover the mortgage and most bills but I'm scrambling to try to get all the info to the people ASAP because we can't keep this up indefinitely. (we have never been able to do much with savings due to all of the legal stuff A's mom put us through, but the other issue is that we had used some of the savings for the wedding and now I've got $1000 in shoe returns still out on the credit card plus another $1000 in medical expenses for FI that should have been paid by insurance but they haven't gotten around to yet plus a bunch of other stuff that we really hadn't anticipated!)

I can't even really talk to FI about this because it stresses him out and that is really bad for him right now (tenses the muscles, affects the spine).

Oh....
And my quarter at school starts 9/23. Still need to get books and parking pass and figure out how to schedule FI's appointments so that he gets all of the medical stuff he needs without my missing a bunch of classes.


My focus today is to breathe and just deal with stuff one thing at a time. It WILL all work out and we'll be just fine. Just have to get through the bumps right now.

 

[antiquesparkler]

Team Elope!

LLC, I missed your post that you had changed your mind. Congrats! I was also looking at Jamaica. Do you know where you are staying/which company you are using for the wedding yet? Would love to hear details!

Aud, Wow! That sounds amazing. No wonder you both are so excited! I love the idea of going through a resort. I think I will focus on that too. For us it will be a little pricier than just going through a company that offers elopement packages but I feel like it would give me more peace-of-mind. Some of the companies look fabulous but I can’t find any reviews on them and that makes me nervous. Most of the cruise ship packages we have been looking at have private spots on various locations to have a very private wedding ceremony so I would be okay with that. Thanks for all the info!!

TP, So sorry to hear of everything going on. You have such a great attitude! One thing at a time-- Everything will turn out just fine. Your FH is a lucky guy to have such a great lady taking care of things!

 

[audball]

TP -- I'm so sorry everything is so stressful right now! I've got positive vibes going your way! Try not to stress...easier said than done, I know.

AS -- thanks for your sweet comments on our plans! Only 47 days to go!

I'll be scarce this weekend since I'm leaving soon for my sister's wedding! I'll catch up on Sunday or Monday! Right now it's looking like a 40-60% chance of rain...the wedding is 100% outdoors with no backup plans. Any positive thoughts anyone can spare to wish the rain away are appreciated!!

 

[antiquesparkler]

My momma and I are going dress shopping on Monday. No wedding date but it should be fun to get some ideas!

 

[antiquesparkler]

TP -- I'm so sorry everything is so stressful right now! I've got positive vibes going your way! Try not to stress...easier said than done, I know.

AS -- thanks for your sweet comments on our plans! Only 47 days to go!

I'll be scarce this weekend since I'm leaving soon for my sister's wedding! I'll catch up on Sunday or Monday! Right now it's looking like a 40-60% chance of rain...the wedding is 100% outdoors with no backup plans. Any positive thoughts anyone can spare to wish the rain away are appreciated!!

Have a fun weekend at the wedding! Sending 'no rain' vibes your way!!

 

[TooPatient]

TP -- I'm so sorry everything is so stressful right now! I've got positive vibes going your way! Try not to stress...easier said than done, I know.

AS -- thanks for your sweet comments on our plans! Only 47 days to go!

I'll be scarce this weekend since I'm leaving soon for my sister's wedding! I'll catch up on Sunday or Monday! Right now it's looking like a 40-60% chance of rain...the wedding is 100% outdoors with no backup plans. Any positive thoughts anyone can spare to wish the rain away are appreciated!!

Have fun at the wedding. I'll be thinking lots of dry thoughts for you!
Can they at least have some umbrellas for people? At least the wedding party? (some big bright colored umbrellas might make fun pictures?)

 

[TooPatient]

My momma and I are going dress shopping on Monday. No wedding date but it should be fun to get some ideas!

Fun!

Dress shopping was exhausting but lots of fun. My favorite places were the ones that I left very open to the consultant to bring me stuff. There are so many that it was overwhelming at the place that actually had me go through and pick what I wanted to try. The next place I went to took the time to walk with me and we sort of selected a few together and then based on my comments she picked some more while I got ready. The place I actually bought from had me pick like 3 and then she picked the rest. Was great!

 

[LoveLikeCrazy]

AS, we saw a travel agent and decided on Sandals Negril. Had I gone home and done some research I might have picked a diff resort - but thus far I have been able to work around the obstacles that I've come across. Our room is a butler suite (one of their highest room categories) so we have a butler! (Had to splurge!). This also made the room rate exorbitant....

As for the wedding itself sandals is quite strict on their no outside vendors policy. Their photographers are "resort" snapshot people whom I don't really trust taking my wedding photos so I hired an off site photographer. She will pick us up after our ceremony and take us all over Negril, ending with TTD session at sunset. So I'm SUPER excited about that. Unfortunately I still have to buy a small package from Sandals bc it will be the ONLY pics I get of the actual ceremony. I also didn't care for their flower selections (or prices!), so I decided to go the natural touch silk flower route. This way I get what I want and it's still less than half the cost of sandals CHEAPEST selection! I should be receiving them in oct, so ill def be posting pics prior to storing them.

Most of the all inclusive resorts provide you with wedding coordinators (from the resort), some resorts charge an offsite vendor fee if you use someone not affiliated with the resort you choose. Sandals is strict and allows no outside people, which would make me not recommend them for people who still want some control over the details lol. Our wedding itself comes to around 600. That includes ceremony, cake, ummmm some odd things like appetizers and sparkling wine (arent we at an all inclusive?!) 18 picture sandals photo package(I think??), hair/makeup trial, hair/makeup day of, candle light white glove service dinner on the beach and I think that's it. The offsite photog was 1500 for 3 hours of coverage. The room rate is 5700. We haven't been able t book flights yet since they aren't available yet on all carriers to compare pricing lol. We were told flights will be from 400-600 per person.

I think that's it!

 

[audball]

My momma and I are going dress shopping on Monday. No wedding date but it should be fun to get some ideas!

Hope you have fun!! Pics or it didn't happen!!

 

[audball]

Have a fun weekend at the wedding! Sending 'no rain' vibes your way!!

Despite nearly an 80% chance of rain for the late afternoon/evening during the ceremony/reception time...we didn't get a single drop! Thank the good Lord above for keeping those skies BLUE!

 

[audball]

Have fun at the wedding. I'll be thinking lots of dry thoughts for you!
Can they at least have some umbrellas for people? At least the wedding party? (some big bright colored umbrellas might make fun pictures?)

Thankfully they weren't needed! Blue skies all around. Hot and humid as HELL outside, but no rain!

 

[mary poppins]

Audball, your elopement package sounds fabulous. Great to hear that it didn't rain on your sister's wedding.

 

[audball]

Audball, your elopement package sounds fabulous. Great to hear that it didn't rain on your sister's wedding.

Thanks mary poppins! We're very much looking forward to it!

Sister is happily married and we all stay dried! All things considered, it was a great success!

 

[TooPatient]

Yay for dry


Had e-pics done today!
Like the photographer. She is super easy to work with and just great all around.

Got my nails done first. Will NOT be using these people for the wedding
I need to e-mail a friend and see who she uses. Her nails look great all the time and she is very picky. Tried this place because they are close to home and seem busy enough that I figured they might be good. The lady almost trimmed the end of my finger off! Uneven paint and even smears on my fingers. I also have a question of the sanitation in the place too

 

[audball]

Woot! You better post some when they're ready! What did you guys decide to wear?

Bummer on the nails not being wedding worthy! At least you were able to give it a test run to see before committing to a wedding appointment! I hope your friend's place is a better fit for you!

So glad to hear that you're happy with the photographer. That's got to be a relief!

 

[TooPatient]

Should have pics to post in a couple of weeks!

We decided to keep it simple and relaxed. Photos at the Museum of Flight so we didn't want to be wandering around all fancy. He wore his standard khaki pants with a golf shirt (tucked in!) and I wore my dressy black pants with a teal tank and then with a purple-ish 3/4 sleeve top. Peep toe leather sandals for me!
Lots of pictures with all sorts of airplanes. Poor FI is still uncomfortable with physical anything in public so only one kiss But we did get lots of great hand hold, hug, head on shoulder shots!


ETA: Last pre-wedding with Rabbi tomorrow!

 

[audball]

TP! I can't wait to see them! Sounds like you'll have some neat shots! Woot on your last meeting pre-wedding with the Rabbi tomorrow! I also just realized that tomorrow is your ONE MONTH out date!! Can you believe it!?!?!!

 

[audball]

Progress! My clutch came in today and it is AMAZINGLY beautiful. It's a perfect match to the peach of my dress and the coral flower and rhinestones are just perfect. I cannot WAIT to carry it on our wedding day!

Part of the stationary we ordered also came in and the color is perfect. The other part shipped today so we should have all that in by the weekend.

My hair comb was received by the seller on Saturday and the replacement/exchange was shipped today so I should have that sometime this week as well

We also purchased fun socks for the FI tonight! He really likes them and I'm glad to have that checked off the list.

Love how small my In Progress and To Do lists are getting!

DONE:
His wedding band
Her wedding band
Her dress
His suit/shirt/tie
Booked hair/makeup for day of
Booked elopement package
Booked additional nights stay
Selected officiant
Selected cake style/flavors
Purchased cake topper supplies
Booked dinner reservations for wedding dinner
Booked photographer
Ordered flower selections
Wrote personal vows
Finalized ceremony script and got it approved by the officiant
Purchased bridal shoes
Scheduled engagement pictures
Purchased new point and shoot camera for trip
Purchased garment bags to transport wedding outfits
Purchased outfits for engagement pictures
Purchased clutch
Purchased stationary (small cards/envelopes) to write vows on for ceremony and to have as a keepsake
Purchased fun socks for Groom

IN PROGRESS:
Assemble/finish cake topper
Purchase/borrow/select bridal jewelry
Purchase bridal hair accessory (exchange in process)
Get dress altered (will wait until late Sept/early Oct)

TO DO:
Purchase undergarments for dress
Select wedding first dance song and purchase for day of
Make spa appointments (mani/pedi, etc) (will make in early-mid Oct)
MARRIAGE LICENSE (will make apt in early Oct for day before wedding)

 

[TooPatient]

I can't believe we're only a month away! So much going on right now. I could use another month or two!
Oh well! Still excited!

Audball -- your list is shrinking! So much DONE


I'm sort of distracted right now as the insurance is being slow so FI didn't get paid. We were able to manage it, but I'm hoping the winery will let us do final payment a week or two late (they've got most already and the deposit makes up the difference so it isn't bad) so that our accounts aren't just empty. The claims person who is supposed to be working with us left on vacation! He's gone for all of this week and part of next week. By the time he gets back it will be too late to get correct numbers so FI will miss another paycheck. I'm hoping that HR can get another person at the insurance company to actually handle this (clear cut case so it isn't like it should be difficult!) and maybe even be able to force through a manual ACH so that he doesn't miss yet another paycheck.
I'm also dealing with another benefits person to get some other papers processed in the event the insurance takes longer to process.

 

[TooPatient]

It feels like less now that I write it down! All of the important bits pretty well done. The rest I'll just keep on working through.

Done:
STD's mailed
his w-band bought
venue selected/booked
wine tasting arranged
cake
invitations
figure out who is sharing room with "A"
who to drive "A" over on the day of
Place in our house for TWO guests to stay (not a couple so need two locations)
My necklace (sapphire & diamond)
my w-band
new kippah for FI
kippah for "A"
DRESS
order kosher wine for blessings
plane ticket for out of town guest
gift registry
Staying Friday night too!
KETUBAH!!!
photographer
engagement photos -- taken!
someone to watch animals for at least 2 nights
find a glass to break
toasting glasses
special Kiddush cup
schedule mikvah visit for me
chuppah
new tallit for FI
translate Hebrew sections to English to print for guests (leaving this to FI)
rental car of OOT guests
underwear to go with dress
outfits to wear for e-pics!
veil (hanging with my dress now!)
shoes (will be here Wednesday!)

In process:
DJ (FI working out music list etc)
music selection
flowers (verging on done -- should have confirmation in the next day or two)
dinner menu (have to wait until closer since all veggies are grown on site)
brunch menu (same as dinner)
nails (1st place no good... trying 2nd place soon!)
kippot (plural of kippah) for guests
book of blessings for dinner
dress fittings (finished one, second scheduled)
order kosher meals for Rabbi & cantor (1st choice is place in NY, if they can't ship to us we'll have to do local)
Place for OOT guest to sleep in our house (both rooms figured out, one ready to use, one almost ready)
pre-wedding counseling with Rabbi (2 done, 1 to go)

To do:
hair
his tux
dress for "A" (waiting for September since she's growing fast!)
frame to hang ketubah
ceremony programs
marriage license
centerpiece materials
FI haircut

 

[TooPatient]

Hope to finish this week:

marriage license (should be able to pick up Wed as the office is open Weds and Thurs)
pre-wedding counseling (last appointment tomorrow!)
DJ
flowers
ketubah frame
start tux process!

PICK A NEW NAME!
FI decided that he really likes the idea of us picking a whole new last name together and both changing to that


Oh....
plus getting our stuff to the tax guy (Of course our wedding is 2 days after tax filing deadline )
get insurance sorted out

 

[audball]

I sympathize! Tomorrow we will be exactly 6 weeks out and while I'm SO EXCITED for the day and to be MARRIED, I've also SOOOO enjoyed being engaged that I'm sad to see that part end, too!

I'm SO sorry the insurance has been such a problem! I have no words! I hope that the venue is understanding and flexible with getting the final payments in. Maybe you could even break the final payment into two so they get some now and some more in two more weeks instead of it all right now?

 

[audball]

And look at you! Your To Do list is getting quite short, as well! And a new name altogether!? Interesting! Glad he's open to other options for you!

 

[antiquesparkler]

Yay for no rain!

Look at you girls, crossing everything off your lists! That is so exciting!

A brand new name? That is so neat! I know of a couple that changed the spelling of his current name to make it easier to pronounce and hopefully easier on their future children but I like the idea of a new name. Will it be a version of one of your exsisting last names?

Well I did go dress shopping but none of the dresses were what I picture for the beach so I am going again next Wednesday to a shop that has a huge collection of destination dresses and will take lots of pics. Pinky promise.

 

[audball]

Well I did go dress shopping but none of the dresses were what I picture for the beach so I am going again next Wednesday to a shop that has a huge collection of destination dresses and will take lots of pics. Pinky promise.

You'd better!