Why am I watching this Bachelor Q & A thing??

[Nicrez]

Why am I watching this first of all?

Next, from what I am gathering, why are they lambasting this guy for not choosing one of these women? Please don''t tell me I am the only one watching this. I have not seen many of these, maybe parts of it in passing, and a few of the ones with Tristan and that guy, who are married, as I see...

I was somewhat sucked into this. Do they do this Q & A after all the Bachelors? Seriously, I am wondering what people think about this HUGE DEAL that is being made about him not picking one.

One seems to have a hot temper and hates losing and the other one is just a little light on the shoulders...

My theory is that none of the 25 candidates were what this guy wanted. He just didn''t feel it. He likely had to go through all this stuff for the show. Also, maybe he believes that you can''t just propose to someone after a few months after kissing all 25 women...

He just said he is not in love, and this one girl is saying how it doesn''t make sense... what part of "you''re not the one" is she not getting? Honestly, this angry one seriously might need to be restrained near him. She just really hates losing. How can you want someone who just doesn''t feel it for you? Let it go and find someone who truly thinks you ARE the one, no?

But the audience is dead against him. What did he do in the previous shows? And why do I care?

 

[Skippy123]

I watched last night and was shocked. I felt bad for the girls. The Q&A is just starting so I will watch it and let you know more of how I feel. I thought it was dumb they showed him buying a Chopard ring (I guess to keep us going)

I doubt I will watch the bachelor again; I just got sucked in because it was right after Dancing with the Stars. The last time I watch the bachelor was I think the 1st and 2nd one and the Bachelorette.

ETA: I agree w/DiamondFan about the bachelor; he kept going on about how he could see these girls as his wife. . . blah, blah, blah.

 

[risingsun]

I''m watching too...and I didn''t see another episode during the entire season!!

 

[diamondfan]

I think what the big issue was is that he kept saying how much he cared about them and had all of these feelings for them. Maybe it concerned him that he could feel that for TWO girls and not clearly about one. But, if he felt that, why not see what happens? It just made no sense that he could not even say, Hey, I really feel deeply, I am not in love yet and will not propose prematurely, but I want to see where this goes". He kept telling DeAnna that he thought of her everyday since then and when they hugged at the end he told her she would never know how much he would miss her. She told him not to say that to her, rightly, because she was only being hurt by hearing it. He could have decided to date or continue a relationship in real life and see what happened, he must have commitment issues.

 

[Nicrez]

Ahhh... thanks DF. I don''t know how he acted, but one can sort of assume. He seems Southern. Kind of like a big old fashioned kind of guy, but it seems to me he was an idealist. Kind of black and white. Either I love or I don''t love.

I hate to admit it, but I have been on both sides of this equation. I have been the one to convince myself of being in love, and then also having been the one who was shocked and confused when all I heard was, "I really like you..." Clearly, the harder one was where you thought everything was perfect. I think getting closure is what helped. To hear WHY. I was angry only when I didn''t know WHY. But after that honestly, I thought, Ok, so it''s not me. I want someone to think WOW, and I deserve that...

But I didn''t see that sort of release when he explained that he just wasn''t in love. I mean as a woman, we are often more romantic and either feel it or not. I mean he was being honest and not faking something he didn''t feel. To me that''s honorable, no? But in the end, I guess these Bachelor shows are odd to me. How can you find someone to marry that quickly, and within such a small selection of the world predetermined for you on national TV??? If it had been that easy, you would have found that person much sooner if you really WERE that great of a catch in the first place.

I guess I still think it''s better to not commit 100% than to commit 75% while the other person gets more into it and sees that walk down the aisle. Then you get the whole impetus of marraige. Two very close friends married and divorced within a few months. They both said they felt it was a little off, but they got swept up in the responsibility and time...

Am I wrong but I say AMEN for him not picking anyone. He may be the most honest of all the bachelors. (clearly not the most popular....)

 

[diamondfan]

Well, only two have even managed to stay together for any length of time, so it might be for the best. He does seem sort of black and white, but it would not have hurt to continue to see the one he cared for most, just to see what might happen. Worth it in my estimation.

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 11/20/2007 11:47:07 PM
Author: diamondfan
Well, only two have even managed to stay together for any length of time, so it might be for the best. He does seem sort of black and white, but it would not have hurt to continue to see the one he cared for most, just to see what might happen. Worth it in my estimation.

That is what his mom said too last night when the show asked her what she thought. His mother said he only thinks in black and white, so maybe that is the way he is. He also said he feels love should be this over the top romantic type of love (I wonder if he will find that). Oh well

 

[Nicrez]

but wouldn''t he have had to give her the ring and such? Maybe he figured if the chemistry wasn''t there it just wasn''t. Again, I can see both sides of the fence, and as a woman, I would rather know I am not the one, sooner than later...?

Do you think these girls really felt for him, or do you think it was the glamor and idea that h was wealthy and handsome and on TV? I read his Bio.*ashamed I went on the website*

From all that I read, he had a tough life and fought his way up to where he is. He seems like an old fashion, hard-working kind og guy who wants a girl like himself. Someone who has the same morality, same sort of pull-up your sleeve attitude, and who is attractive and very smart. Were any of these gals like that? Based soley on their pictures (and I am sorry it''s all I have) they seem like little girly girls who maybe somewhat straightforward and a bit too polished and pretty. Kind of less of the roll-up your sleeves tough gal who is also naturally pretty and can grow with him? Were any of these gals like that?

He most likely has commitment issues as well...hmmmm.... he mentioned gay. I wonder if that''s a consideration. Somehow I don''t think so.

 

[monarch64]

I watched maybe a handful of episodes this season (mainly because I thought he was quite good looking, lol)...I always got the sense that he was looking for an "ideal" mate and that he was a bit of a perfectionist. I really can''t fault him for not choosing either of the last two gals, even though maybe he did lead them both on a little. I agree with you Nicrez, that it was honorable that he didn''t just choose one gal and propose, or tell her "let''s see how it goes IRL." I think it took a large amount of character for him to admit to both of them that he wasn''t sure at all, and that he couldn''t return their feelings of love. He seems to be a realist, not a romantic, and there is nothing wrong with that. Is he possibly gay? Maybe, maybe not...but why would he go to the trouble of participating in such a show if there were any question in his mind as to his proclivity? I really doubt that he is not heterosexual, and it''s sad that people question that fact based on his final decision. It is a very interesting show, I am always surprised at how soon people seem to fall in love from what is shown to the viewing public. I can''t imagine being put in a very unrealistic environment and just falling in love with the subject! I think it''s fun to watch these reality shows because it gives us that "inside" view of someone else''s personal life, but it''s important to remember that those people''s lives are not really "real." Hard to keep that in mind though, when you as the viewer are shown nothing but the dramatic moments and those are what you have to piece together when deciding who to sort of root for.

 

[snlee]

I watched last night and was shocked! I totally agree with DF. If he wasn't ready to propose to one of them, wouldn't he at least want to continue to date in real life and see what happens? He kept going on about how strongly he felt for each other them. Then why'd he say bye to both!? The Q&A hasn't come on yet but I'll be watching it tonight and I'll let you know what I think.

 

[bebe]

Confusing wasn''t it? I don''t know, maybe he was just going along with the whole concept of the show. Who knows, maybe he knew halfway through he couldn''t fall in love with any of the girls. I personally felt he did string them along, but you know, when you sign on for a show like that, you have to prepare yourself for the hurt that is bound to come. But on tonight''s show, I was glad to see Deanna let him have it. He seemed stunned when she was speaking out against him. Good for her.

 

[Mara]

oh my god we just finished watching. i had to explain to greg why DeAnna was so upset about it not making sense. i think as a guy he just doesn't get it! watching the show last nite totally pi$$ed me off! he basically is saying he didn't feel it with either of them but the whole time he kept them around and going through the motions? and he was what...like he said...hoping to feel something in the end for DeAnna? but hello he had the show fly down her DAD...doesn't that speak of surety? and then what? he freaks out and says he isn't in love with her?! i think he was just scared. and that whole copout about how she deserves someone who knows for sure, blabbety blah blah...DUDE so what, you didn't know after 6 weeks on a fantasy reality show...does that really mean you could never know? just look at women around the world, have been waiting for years for their guy to be 10000% sure. it doesn't mean you just walk out of their lives and say oh welp you deserve better!

it was really disappointing too (and i don't even know why, seriously, because this show is such a mockery at this point, i loved how they brought back the whoppin 2 couples out of like 50 that have actually made it in the last 7 years!!) because i really liked brad and thought he seemed like a really decent guy who was really seeking love the whole show. and he seemed like he had a good head on his shoulders. and i think he IS a nice guy, but let me tell you, as a woman, sitting there just watching the show, i was so incredibly frustrated for DeAnna because she wants answers and he couldn't give them to her. THEN he is saying stuff like he misses her, thinks about her, blah blah...and then still saying he stands by his decision. mixed signals much??? and good for her that she stood up for herself and told him that she thinks he's fulla bull. it was SO sad when she said that he was going to regret it and he would never get another chance and he said i understand that, because i almost feel like he is going to regret it later.

on a hilarious note...chris harrison just cracks me up!! he is such an instigator! 'so you must feel a little rejected right?'...or 'this must be really awkward right?'....and he has no problem interrupting people when they are talking to ask the totally obvious questions or get them started talking about what he wants, but during the whole exchange with DeAnna and Brad when she was basically telling him she didn't get the answers and he was saying he was sorry and she was like don't tell me that blah blah..there were CRICKETS in the room for oh...at least 30 seconds. did anyone else notice that? and i thought oh here is where chris jumps in. but NOPE. crickets. and then brad was kind of looking over at chris and i just had to start laughing, it was so friggin painful to watch!!!

oh and nicrez he did not have to give her the ring, in the past bachelors have said they are into the girl but want to see how it works in real life. so that was an option, but he totally didn't go for it. for the record i loved DeAnna...i thought she was so awesome in how she stood up for herself, was frank and honest with any questions that were put to her. she was definitely one of my favorites from the beginning. out of a lot of the girls i thought she was one of the most savvy and intelligent and straight forward gals this show has ever seen.

i agree that he should not have to apologize for 'not falling in love' as he put it...but i think people are confused because he acted so much like he was in love and he was saying all the right things to the ladies AND the camera/audience/us...and then to go and do something totally drastic like neither of them are the one and he doesn't even want to SEE...that's a copout.

and i really can't believe i just furiously typed 5 paragraphs about this pathetic show in less than 5 minutes. ARGH! i have to go to bed.

 

[Girlrocks]

I totally understand if he wasn''t feeling it, he shouldn''t pretend. However, the part that bothers me is that he bought the ring AND asked the producers to have DeAnna''s father flown out to California because he is old fashioned and wanted to ask the father''s permission before he proposed. The host of the show even said that everyone on the show thought he was going to propose. I think with DeAnna, he was letting her get her hopes up where he should have been honest about his feelings or lack thereof all along.

 

[mrssalvo]

i''m a shamed Bachelor watcher too

But, mara, i''m with you 100%. I was hoping he''d pick Deanna from the begininning, or the 3rd-4th episode when i started watching and was so excited when jenni got out of the limo first monday night. Then when he dumped Deanna too, i found myself annoyed with the show and him, although I can understand if he just didn''t feel it anythinng for her. he totally lead her on though and that was just wrong. Part of me was hoping he would ask her back during lasts night show, that would have made it all worth while, but nooooo. It''s like the movie "the breakup" with Jennifer Anniston. it''s torture watching but if they at least end up together it will all be ok. didn''t happen

reality tells me though, that none (well 2) of the couples have made it and this one would have probably ended the same way.

 

[diamondfan]

For him to think that after 6 weeks and dates with so many others that he would be totally head over heels no ifs ands or buts just seems a tad unrealistic to me. He has a married brother so he has seen it in action, but maybe he has commitment issues. He did state he has issues and needs to deal with them, so maybe this will make him see that he needs some help. He sure seemed to have a lot of feelings for her, BUT when he kept saying that she had all the things he would ever want in a wife and mom I heard a big BUT in his voice. Maybe he thought she had it all on paper but he just lacked certain chemistry in real life. Again, totally his right to decide that he wants more, but if more is some intangible obscure thing or something he THINKS he should feel but is not real, that might lead to lots of unhappiness.

 

[Rhea]

It pissed me off that at the end he wispered "I'll miss you more than you'll ever know" to DeAnna. Um, ok, why on earth not just say "I didn't fall in love with you during those 6 weeks filming a reality TV show and don't want to propose, but wanna go to dinner next week and see how this works in the real world?"

He claims to miss them and to not be in love with either of them. Which is fine. Then don't get engaged. But both women did want to know why he wouldn't try for it in the real world and I think that's a fair enough question. Too bad he was incapable of answering it! He was kinda leading her on with his word on the show last night and then denying her even a coffee date. Why?

(And don't even get me started on the fact that he had the producer fly DeAnna's father in because the Bachelor was planning to propose to her.)

 

[Nicrez]

Now I have to laugh, because I should have been watching this with Mara to explain it. I admit I was completely stumped as to why DeAnna was so angry. To me, I would be bummed for sure, and think wow, I guess I felt more than he did, but to be THAT angry is somewhat confusing. Granted I didn't watch the whole show...

I am a bit like a guy in this respect. To me it's far more practical to know sooner than later, and I appreciate honesty. When I was a child, I had one girl in school who just didn't like me. She wasn't fake, and when I confronted her once, she said honestly, I just don't like you. We respected that for years and just never had an issue. But I don't take such things personally. I believe there is just unexplained chemistry of people, even in personality. Can't always put your finger on it, so I stopped trying. I once dated a guy for a long time and although everything was literally great "on paper", I just didn't feel enough to really commit to him. We broke it off, and I had nothing better to go on than I just don't see us going further without the chemistry. That was it. We tried valiantly, and it just didn't work.

I think some things are gut instinct, and personally, I would have been MORE mad had he said I want to get to know you and prolonged it when he wasn't feeling it. There is a certain amount of time one takes to convince yourself that this person has a shot when sometimes you feel that is not the case. But to genuinely try, and then know that it's not there, I felt that you go through this resentment stage where once you KNOW, interaction with that person just becomes negative because you are looking for a way to break it off and it's not easy. So you call less, you act less sweet, and they are no longer getting your 100%, but now like 30%, and that's not fair to waste their time and yours. Who wants someone's 30% when everyone deserves 100%. THAT is what pisses me off. Settling for less than you deserve.

But then again I am a funny creature. I would rather be upfront, honest and deal with all that in the beginning. I find it a relief because I am not suffering more than need be. Imagine he would have told her father she's the ONE, then they date and all the while he KNOWS she isn't quite it. Camera crews and tabloids following them, putting more pressure on something already shaky. Clearly, he is hoping to make the marraige his first, and it's not just a publicity stunt to get on TV.

I know DeAnna seems the crowd favorite and I don't know her persona, except for that night and a few random episode tidbits really, but to me, they were a terrible fit. He seemed open, and simple, and she seemed like this very strong emotioned and scorned woman. Again, when one loves and it's not returned, anger is not an emotion that comes to my mind. That's a petty feeling that usually comes when pride is hurt. It was national TV, so that's got to be tough, but if you TRUELY loved someone, sadness is what I feel. I think anger is initial, but after 2 months, really that should have subsided. Again, I think her ego was more bruised than her heart... I'm not saying he's right, but I do totally see where he's coming from. I just find the human drama over falling in love with a man who is publically kissing and canoodling with 25 women in front of you, somewhat disturbing. If I have to fight for a guy to love me, then he doesn't and I think, MOVE ON.

Favorite line by far, "I don't usually open up, but I really put myself out there..." Wow, overused... Anyone really think that's the truth?

 

[decodelighted]

Date: 11/21/2007 9:40:40 AM
Author: Addy
It pissed me off that at the end he wispered ''I''ll miss you more than you''ll ever know'' to DeAnna.

He did this because he is a big ol'' DRAMA QUEEN and he gets his jollies by DRAMATIZING and EMOTING blah blah. I think it''s hilarious and so, so sad that he''s still dreaming of a "fantasy romance" at his age. It would be one thing if he had a realistic idea about love & wasn''t "in love" with either of these girls. But that he''s all "I''m so ROMANTIC" -- VOMIT!

And I didn''t even WATCH this season ... so my analysis is based solely on a partial viewing of that horrid "After The Final Rose" hoo-ha.

I do think it''s admirable that he refused to be bullied into anything by the production team & implied pressure of the situation. But abhorrent that he dragged that poor girl''s FATHER into it ... and that he continues to mess with her mind for his own twisted pleasure.

Will someone please stop telling this guy what a "catch" he is? That special snowflake is gonna keep on breaking hearts until he figures his ish out.

 

[Nicrez]

Date: 11/21/2007 10:14:28 AM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 11/21/2007 9:40:40 AM
Author: Addy
It pissed me off that at the end he wispered 'I'll miss you more than you'll ever know' to DeAnna.

He did this because he is a big ol' DRAMA QUEEN and he gets his jollies by DRAMATIZING and EMOTING blah blah. I think it's hilarious and so, so sad that he's still dreaming of a 'fantasy romance' at his age. It would be one thing if he had a realistic idea about love & wasn't 'in love' with either of these girls. But that he's all 'I'm so ROMANTIC' -- VOMIT!

And I didn't even WATCH this season ... so my analysis is based solely on a partial viewing of that horrid 'After The Final Rose' hoo-ha.

I do think it's admirable that he refused to be bullied into anything by the production team & implied pressure of the situation. But abhorrent that he dragged that poor girl's FATHER into it ... and that he continues to mess with her mind for his own twisted pleasure.

Will someone please stop telling this guy what a 'catch' he is? That special snowflake is gonna keep on breaking hearts until he figures his ish out.

Special snowflake! That's hysterical!

Your last sentence had me in stitches!!!

 

[Mara]

nicrez, i am a lot like you in the respect that i prefer the honest, up front response, and would prefer not to be misled of course, but i think that her anger (and the rest of the watchers!) is just because it felt so blindsiding at the time! i mean obviously she was just really CONFUSED! and yes i''d be angry too. hello i went on this show, i opened up to you and you said all the right things and then said oh sorry i''m not in love with you, and on national television to boot, ouchie. plus i can really feel for her because i have been there...sure you knew what was going to happen, then it ends and you are thinking okay what just happened there? someone left me off the clue bus! i also didn''t really get closure, and also got the same kind of lame excuses about ''things changed'' or whatever, which just was really not good enough at the time. sure i was a lot younger, but that experience really did take a long time for me to get over and being angry and confused and all that. i am the type of person who wants a REASON for things, and many times feelings are hard to describe so there ends up being frustration. so i totally felt for DeAnna because after that experience, she couldn''t talk to him for 2.5 months and she was left with her own emotions all alone and as she said, people would come up to her and say oh i''m sure he chose you....gosh how hard would that be, and that would make me angry as well...because it''d be like some new fresh scab torn off. so i can def see how she''s angry after 2.5 months. but to her credit, kudos for saying she''d give him another chance even though he did that to her, because i definitely feel the same way...about giving the right person a 2nd chance. so while she was angry and confused, she still was pretty open about how she really wantd him to say he''d made a mistake and lets go out. and he still was standing by his black/white decision.

so yeah buddy, enjoy being alone....and working on your issues. haha as you can see i am still all foaming at the mouth about this. hehee. seriously, i think that many women can relate to a time in their lives when they had something similar happen to them, aka blindsided by something you didn''t expect and that is why people are relating so strongly to it.

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 11/21/2007 10:14:28 AM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 11/21/2007 9:40:40 AM
Author: Addy
It pissed me off that at the end he wispered ''I''ll miss you more than you''ll ever know'' to DeAnna.

He did this because he is a big ol'' DRAMA QUEEN and he gets his jollies by DRAMATIZING and EMOTING blah blah. I think it''s hilarious and so, so sad that he''s still dreaming of a ''fantasy romance'' at his age. It would be one thing if he had a realistic idea about love & wasn''t ''in love'' with either of these girls. But that he''s all ''I''m so ROMANTIC'' -- VOMIT!

And I didn''t even WATCH this season ... so my analysis is based solely on a partial viewing of that horrid ''After The Final Rose'' hoo-ha.

I do think it''s admirable that he refused to be bullied into anything by the production team & implied pressure of the situation. But abhorrent that he dragged that poor girl''s FATHER into it ... and that he continues to mess with her mind for his own twisted pleasure.

Will someone please stop telling this guy what a ''catch'' he is? That special snowflake is gonna keep on breaking hearts until he figures his ish out.

That bugged the crap out of me too. It looked like DeAnna did not want to hug him and then he says that lame crap!!! I totally agree w/Mara''s post and then I LOVE Deco''s post about him thinking he was so special! hehee Bravo DECO

 

[HollyS]

Date: 11/21/2007 10:14:28 AM
Author: decodelighted

Date: 11/21/2007 9:40:40 AM
Author: Addy
It pissed me off that at the end he wispered ''I''ll miss you more than you''ll ever know'' to DeAnna.

He did this because he is a big ol'' DRAMA QUEEN and he gets his jollies by DRAMATIZING and EMOTING blah blah. I think it''s hilarious and so, so sad that he''s still dreaming of a ''fantasy romance'' at his age. It would be one thing if he had a realistic idea about love & wasn''t ''in love'' with either of these girls. But that he''s all ''I''m so ROMANTIC'' -- VOMIT!

And I didn''t even WATCH this season ... so my analysis is based solely on a partial viewing of that horrid ''After The Final Rose'' hoo-ha.

I do think it''s admirable that he refused to be bullied into anything by the production team & implied pressure of the situation. But abhorrent that he dragged that poor girl''s FATHER into it ... and that he continues to mess with her mind for his own twisted pleasure.

Will someone please stop telling this guy what a ''catch'' he is? That special snowflake is gonna keep on breaking hearts until he figures his ish out.

Deco, you always cut to the chase in the most direct, pithy, wonderfully sarcastic way that we''ve all come to love! You are my icon. I aspire to be you.

 

[Nicrez]

The whole, "I''ll love you more than you''ll ever know" was strange. If you consider him somewhat noble for being honest and sticking to his guns to say you know what I think it''s better to just back out and figure NO ONE then to settle, ok. But be noble and shush. Don''t pour salt.

I think I can chalk that up to two factors sadly from experience of being lead on for almost 8 years by one guy in an upsetting yo-yo of "you''re The One" to "thank God we are just friends!"

One if he is the idealistic guy who wants perfection and thinks I really like this girl on paper but something is not fulfilling what I want. He would say something like that because he is too stupid to understand that she DOESN''T want to HEAR that and it actually hurts MORE. Men are often oblivious by nature, some more than others. Empathy is a four letter word...

Also, a person who wants to get a surface emotion out, will say and do what they feel at the time, regardless of the consequences. It''s annoying. I think it''s a bit of immaturity to see that sometimes self-sacrifice over wanting to say and do things you feel at the moment are not always good for the situation. DeAnna being a prime case. It would upset the situation, considering how angry she was. I think he was confused because in all honestly, maybe he felt he HAD to say and do all those things to NOT hurt her feelings. Some people are odd that way. I have seen women go through weddings and marraiges to "nice guys" because they didn''t want to hurt them. That I just don''t get. I think he should have figured out what he wants and figured out what she lacked. Those two months he should have taken the alone time to think about himself and maybe see a therapist to work it out. If not, do it yourself and then when you get on the show, be honest with what the issue was. If he would have said, "honestly, I felt physical chemistry, but no mental connection", then DONE. Or if he said "I would rather be alone than to lead you one when I just knew it had no future. That''s my issue, and I was honest."

It was the wishy-washy behavior that I could see as upsetting. But I don''t think I would be quite as upset over the whole not getting chosen, father being called, national TV thing. Sure it sucks, but those are the risks of love and dating. Better that than waiting at the end of an empty aisle in a white gown...or after their first kid... again, I just see if as a good thing to know sooner than later.

But agreed with Deco...special snowflake he is not!

 

[FireGoddess]

i''ve been tivoing so I haven''t seen the after the rose thing yet but last night I watched the finale. i am just so DISGUSTED!!!! i stopped watching the bachelor a few seasons ago because it was so pointless but a friend of mine dragged me back into it a few episodes in because she was talking about how great this one seemed, really wanted to find his wife, etc. but that pathetic ending of not choosing anyone is so LAME! he did NOT have to get engaged at the end - many people say ''i choose you, but i''m not ready to propose, let''s get to know each other in real life and just date'' and to not even do that, particularly after saying how these 2 women are everything he wants (over and over and over again), was just so ridiculously LAME. i became so disgusted by even the sight of him that i don''t know if i''ll even watch the special. i mean, that''s why deanna didn''t ''get it''....you have him saying for weeks on end that you''re everything he wants, etc, and then he shuts the door in your face without even the opportunity of exploring a real relationship? that was total bs. just disgusted here!!!

 

[togal]

It seems to me that the whole thing was a scheme concocted by Brad and his brothers to gain more publicity for their already thriving bars. These are real Texas frat-house party bars....no doubt initially concieved as a way for the bros. to meet girls. I just checked out Brad's MySpace page and it's quite obvious that he's been promoting this thing like crazy, including viewing parties at the bars with "guess who won't get the rose" contests. He even put this message on his blog page: "I hope everyone is just as excited to find out who the final rose will be given to as I am to share the moment with my fans.". Fans? What a tool. Seriously! Am I the only one who thinks he talks like Forrest Gump?

 

[surfgirl]

Nicrez, clearly dear, you dont have enough Thanksgiving Day cooking to do. To remedy this, may I suggest that you invite at least 25 people for TDay next year so that you have no time for this sort of tomfoolery?

 

[Nicrez]

I am not a cooker, got that from dear ol'' mom. We are best suited to ENJOY the food others work on. My sister however is likely knee deep in pots and pans right now, bless her... Nope, my usual contribution is the ambiance, decor, expert adult beverage service, and music, which usually is sorely in need once all the cooks in my family finally exit the kitchen.

We still celebrate at my parent''s home, since as long as my parents are alive (knock on wood) will be HOME to everyone in my family. All major events happen there.

On the ocassional whim to cook or just to make hor de oeuvres I am solid, but if anything I like to contribute to the sweet tooth of the event. This year, I am holed up in the office today completely delaying all effort to do anything decently productive. As a matter of fact, Harriet is helping me, and we are going for coffee in a few minutes (as she works close to my office), so that I can waste more time in not working. We are going to talk shop, and I am going to try YET AGAIN to convince her to join the jewlery industry. It''s a matter of time, I assure you...

She WILL come to the dark side... Beacon is already getting there...

So, yes, last night that whole episode (I don''t want much TV anymore) actually spurred me on to this wave of thought about the subject.
About what it means to have something good but want something better. To know there is something far far better than to settle and to finding that thing that makes you deliriously happy.

....Or to laugh at this Bachelor who clearly is trying to promote his bars...shameless!!!

And here I thought it was noble to be honest and he literally IS being a total jerk leading the girls on just to get publicity...

Mara, now I am MAD!

 

[VRBeauty]

I also have to admit that I watched the last few episodes. The whole Batchelor/Batchelor reality show concept seems pretty preposterous to me, and I usually make a point of not watching, but.... it was on right after Dancing with the Stars (a wonderful guilty pleasure). And I've once again taken up with the demon sticks, which tends to keep me from turning off the TV at appropriate end-points...

Nicrez, my thinking is right in line with yours. Minus that bar thing, which I basically know nothing about. I was surprised with the outcome. But... I've been in the position staying with someone longer than I should because I thought I should/could/would fall in love with them. When you realize that you can't or won't, pulling the plug really is the only option. He may not have handled it well... he certainly didn't handle it perfectly... but I don't fault him for not providing the obligatory fairy tale ending.

Of course a lot of our ancestors would have scoffed at the notion that you need to be in love to make a marriage work. They'd be telling us that love is more a product of the time and committment put into the marriage and the shared goals (in many cases, the goal being survival.) But that's a topic for another day.

So I expect to swear off the Batchelor/batchelorette or whatever again. The notion that 25 beautiful people plus one beautiful person of the opposite sex (preferably well-off) plus over-the-top dates equals a love connection (made on a set time-line, no less), and that a love connection equals a meaningful relationship, does not seem at all like reality to me!

Unless of course it's scheduled right after Dancing with the Stars again next season.

And if XXX wins Dancing

, I may have to take a stand there as well!

*tosses in grains of salt*

 

[decodelighted]

Okay so I was just reading this article about that bachelor reject getting getting back together with her ex right after said rejection and ... GEEZ ... does anyone else see some red flags???

Croft said that in addition to a more recent move from Miami to Phoenix, she had also previously moved from Dallas to Miami -- leaving a coveted three-year cheerleading gig with the Dallas Cowboys in the process-- in order to remain together with Russell. However despite her willingness to move cross-country with him, Russell wasn''t interested in proposing to Croft. "I wanted to marry him when I first moved to Miami with him," she told KZZP-FM.
Although she hadn''t received the marriage proposal she wanted, Croft still subsequently followed Russell from Miami to Phoenix for his job "in the mortgage business," where, in attempt to finally get him to propose to her, she eventually moved out of the couple''s joint living space and began living with a Phoenix-area girlfriend in December.
According to Croft, it was during the period after she moved out and Russell "broke-up" with her that she was cast on The Bachelor''s eleventh edition.

Croft gushed about Russell repeatedly during the interview, saying he''s "more than a loan officer;" is "absolutely" better looking than Womack; and "actually [has] 10-times better of a personality than The Bachelor." However despite Russell''s standing, he was unable to attend the recent funeral of Bettie Doralee Elsten, Croft''s grandmother, in Wichita. "He couldn''t. He was in Phoenix," Croft told KZZP-FM. "But it was like a spur-of-the-moment thing, I flew out that day and I came right back... He did send flowers to every single person in my family and to the funeral. He definitely wished he could be there -- and I do two -- but some things just happen."

Croft said she planned on spending last week''s Thanksgiving holiday with her family in Wichita as well as with Russell, however apparently not in the same place at the same time.

"I''m actually driving to Oklahoma to see him," said Croft, explaining Russell''s late flight from Phoenix to Oklahoma made too tiresome for him to actually make the drive to Wichita. "He just flew-in last night at like 1AM -- he''s a great guy!"

The tone the reporter takes is so dead-pan ... like ... this guy is totally not into this girl EITHER and she doesn''t even realize it.

 

[littlelysser]

A friend of mine got some Bachelor Scoop...totally don''t know how reliable it is...

According to her source, the whole thing went awry after he met with BETTINA''s family, because SHE was the one he was in love with...

But after Super-Smarty Bettina Daddy made him feel bad, he was all heartbroken and sent her home...so he was left with two ladies he wasn''t super crazy about and was broken hearted.

Whether or not it is true...well, that totally remains to be seen.