what''s the least expensive gift you received for your wedding?...

[MichelleCarmen]

Date: 5/18/2005 11:17:41 AM
Author: youngster
Ah, yes, this does bring back memories. 20+ years ago we received a hand-made pie plate from someone who was taking a pottery class! I never knew if it was food safe and finally gave it away a few years ago. (It was not terribly attractive.) The person who made the item was really broke so we just appreciated the thought.

oh, no. . .you should feel guilty - lol! I made pottery for a few years and working with clay is extremely challenging

(of course, though, no matter how much work is put into a piece, if it''s ugly, it shouldn''t be given out -

l)

FWIW, in standard pottery classes, non-toxic food-safe glaze is generally used.

Michelle

 

[curlygirl]

moremoremore, I agree with you 100%--I''m in NYC and I always give money as a gift. My mother is against the whole shower thing too because she thinks it''s like begging for gifts but I''ve given gifts to everyone else for their showers so I''m DEFINITELY having one! She told me not to register anywhere to guarantee that people will just give money!

A little off topic but are you supposed to give a gift if you don''t attend the wedding? I have always sent something regardless of whether or not I went to the wedding but others have said it''s unnecessary...

 

[LadyluvsLuxury]

There are two crappy gifts that I can recall........my husbands aunt (who won the lottery for over $1M a few years back), gave us a $10 check....our dinner alone PER person was $35

Secondly, a relative of mine gave us a $25 check..........which later bounced!!!!

 

[MINE!!]

We actually asked people NOT to give us gifts, we invited them because we wanted to share this day with them because they have shared their lives with us. We have asked them just to come.. that is their gift to us.. they are our gift to us.........

 

[Jaded Gem]

Yeah, I don't understand the manners of some people. I got a friend of mine a wedding gift that was about $75 even though she didn't invite me to her wedding. However, since she told me all the details about it for over a year, I thought it would be nice to get her and her future husband something. The next year I got married, and I invited both her and her husband. They own their own home in the Bay area, he drives a Lexus, she drives a Honda, and they don't even have any kids. They were treated to a $100 per plate dinner at the Sheraton, and they didn't bring a thing...not even a card to congratulate us. They ate, drank, danced, and then they left. Needless to say, I don't think about inviting them to our next get togethers. I guess we were not as close as friends as I had thought.

 

[Dancing Fire]

i know this is an old thread but....this "cheap" friend of mine is getting marry soon.hee,hee....REVENGE

what should i get him from the 99 cent store?

 

[glaucomflecken]

I got married almost a month ago and we got several gifts of nothing from some people. I mean, not even a card. But they sure ate my food and drank my booze! We got most everything off our registry and some people gave is some bizarre things but you know there was thought put into it! However, someone gave us hair catches for the shower drain...that was weird!

 

[ame]

The NOTHING that my boss gave me.

 

[qtiekiki]

I guess a lot of us are getting a whole lot of nothing. How can people feel ok with going to a wedding without even a card? I would feel bad if I didn''t give a gift.

Dancing Fire - maybe you can just give him the same gift and see what he thinks about it. hahaha

 

[LollyBear]

While the dirty ice cream maker is gross, I think I win in the disgusting gift department. My step-grandmother gave us an old plastic salad server set. It was funny at first because of how old it obviously was with a faded picture of people in their 80''s gear on the box. It wasn''t until I stood up and realized that the box had dumped termite turd in my lap that I became disgusted.

It was all I could do to not vomit. After a long hot shower that one quickly made its way to the dumpster.

 

[cutes814]

WOW, I just can''t believe some people would be able to enjoy the wedding without bringing something, or worse give some of the things you guy listed. Doesn''t it stay on their conscience?

I''m Chinese, so we''ll be okay. We''ll just be receiving a lot of cash. Gotta love it.

 

[njc]

We got a lot of nothing as well.

 

[Erin]

Since reading this I remember asking my coworker about her worst wedding gift. She said her neighbors got married about two months prior to them and they obviously regifted from their wedding because they forgot to remove the card

 

[butterfly 17]

I had relatives at my wedding give us absolutely nothing. I have also had plain letter envelopes(no card) with $20 to $40 dollars in it from my husband''s parents friends- and no name to thank the person.
I guess I would have been embarrassed to put my name on it as well!
If I could do it all over again, I would have just had a simple beach wedding with about 50 people tops.

 

[Shay37]

A small pasta bowl with a pattern that had a crack in it. They came and brought an extra person with them. Our wedding was catered, and we lost a lot on those three.

shay

 

[yeewl]

curly girl: A little off topic but are you supposed to give a gift if you don''t attend the wedding? I have always sent something regardless of whether or not I went to the wedding but others have said it''s unnecessary...


I m not sure of that but for my case, if i am unable to attend the wedding banquet and since the married couple had already send me an invitation card, I just send a cheque to them cos i know they do need the extra spare cash. It just depends on how much i guess.. if its to your very best friend or blood-related cousins..I will give a bit more.

When i had my wedding banquet at Four Seasons Singapore, a few of my friends couldn''t come last minute, they just send me the cheques instead. I was grateful cos the wedding already created a big hole in my pocket...

In our chinese culture, as elders, (all my cousins are younger than me) during the tea serving ceremony, not only do i have to give an ang pow(red packet contains $$) but at the same time i will either buy 916 gold bracelet/necklace or a diamond pendent etc. just wanted them to have something to remember us.

The last wedding I attended with my hubby and MIL were an expensive one. It''s my MIL''s brother eldest daughter wedding.
MIL bought a gold bracelet while i got her a purple gold pendent from Lee Hwa for the tea serving ceremory. Then at the banquet we just gave them the red packet.

 

[Ms.Kat]

My husband's sister, who was a BRIDESMAID, didn't give us anything, not even a card. There were no expenses, no extra parties, or showers. Not only that, she showed up to our wedding wearing the WRONG DRESS!!! I picked a simple black dress that she already owned and she showed up in a flower printed dress. She was sent home to change and put our wedding on hold for an hour. We had an evening wedding and had planned pictures at the beach for sunset...it was almost dark by the time we got down there.

We didn't let her ruin our day, though it sures seems like she tried! We enjoyed our day and luckily ended up getting some amazing pics.

What do we give her for her wedding in Dec? A lump of coal???

 

[omc]

wow, if you view your guests as simply present bearing warm bodies, why even invite anyone at all? Why not just take the thousands of dollars that you spend on the wedding, buy all your gifts yourself, and save yourself the grudges? I can understand being bewildered by used nasty gifts, but some people either can''t afford a gift or already spent money on shower presents or simply forgot (which of course is no excuse). Frankly, I want to give my friends presents and would give more if I could, but if I ever felt like my friend wouldn''t want me at their wedding without a suitable gift that allows them to "break even" on their cost for inviting me... well I would rather they simply leave my name off the list. A gift is a gift, not a ticket to the wedding.

 

[ello]

Wow - I''m shocked - people can be so inconsiderate.

 

[icekid]

omc- I think it is seriously inconsiderate, no matter how poor you are, to not even bring a card. We are scrimping and saving big time for this wedding(I am a med student, and thus lack income). No dinners out, no going out with friends.. etc. If we care enough about you to share our day with you, I hope you care enough about us to at least offer your congratulations.

One of my fiance's friends- ugh, there is no way in hell we will get so much as a card from him. I personally don't like him at all. This is the kind of guy who went out to dinner with a couple friends, ordered a huge steak dinner and dessert, and then put down TWO DOLLARS- no joke. But we're inviting him anyway, as my fiance still considers him to be a friend (some kind of friend?!) and has known him since he was about 5.

eta- gifts don't have to be expensive anyway. Some of the very best gifts with the most meaning are the ones with the most thought. Putting some effort into showing that you care is what counts, IMO.

 

[MiniMouse]

I''m trying to decide what''s worse.... not getting anything or getting something old and used. Somehow I think old and used is worse. There''s no excuse for it.

If I''m invited to a wedding I''ll always get a gift, even if I don''t go. I think a token gift is okay, if some thought has gone into it, but not plastic cups or hair catches for the shower drain. I don''t think I''d want to be remembered every time it was cleaned out. That''s gross.

Years ago (when my purse wasn''t flush with cash) I was really stuck on what to get a friend, so I got a home magazine subscription for her for a year and it went down a treat, she really loved it, yet it wasn''t expensive. It''s the amount of thought and effort that''s gone into a gift that counts, not the value.

 

[drk]

I think our worst is now officially a "regift" waffle maker. We sure didn''t have anything like that on our registry, and we already have a small one at home. Of course there was no gift enclosure, and when we tried to return it (so that we could buy a dinner plate or something that we would actually use) last week (recognized the store brand, and they have a policy that if the gift didn''t come with a gift enclosure or receipt, they will give you back the last registered sale price on the item), we were told that they last sold this item 2-3 years ago, and that we could have a refund for 60% off $29.99. That would be a grand total of $12 (Canadian). The couple that gave this to us drive a BMW and own their own home. I''d rather have had them buy us a towel off the registry for $12 than get something we really don''t need.

I hope I can find someone in my family and friends who''d actually like a waffle iron.

At least it wasn''t nothing - though then I suppose I wouldn''t have the hassle of trying to find a home for the gift...

 

[monarch64]

Something else people don''t take into consideration when they receive cheap gifts is the fact that some people get invited to a lot of weddings...I''m not saying we give cheap gifts, on the contrary, but this past spring along we went to 6 different weddings and I attended most of the showers and bachelorette parties that went along with them. My husband was in one of the weddings and it was in Louisiana (we live in Chicago). We gave every one of those couples $200 for the wedding gift, and I gave a $50 item off their registries for each shower, as well as a lingerie gift for the bachelorette party. I had to buy a couple of new dresses and jewelry/accessories, some of these weddings were attended by some of the same guests as others. Now, we drive nice cars and own our own home, but we really felt like our bank account got pummeled this year! We actually turned down one acquaintance''s wedding because we felt we were merely being invited for the gifts. I get really fed up when people have the attitude that their wedding guests should "cover their plate" or pretty much pay for their wedding. IMO, it''s tacky and unrealistic to expect this. I was touched when a lady who used to babysit for me sent us $20 in a card--they are elderly now and on a fixed income, but if they had been wealthy I still would''ve appreciated it. My father gave us a set amount of money for the cost of our wedding, and we trimmed down our guest list to meet that factor and paid for the photographer and flowers ourselves. We certainly weren''t going to live beyond our means and expect our guests to pay for it! Sorry I''m being so negative, I just think it''s unfair to judge people by the gifts they give you.

 

[omc]

I get really fed up when people have the attitude that their wedding guests should "cover their plate" or pretty much pay for their wedding. IMO, it''s tacky and unrealistic to expect this.

agreed. I have a real problem with the "cover your plate" atittude. I have been asked to be a bridesmaid by a very good friend, and she is thinking of having a trip somewhere fun for her bachelorette party. I will be buying a dress for her wedding along with hosting showers and such. Accepting to be a bridesmaid is a financial obligation that you should not accept unless you are prepared to take the responsibilty, but also it''s an honor that really usually can''t be declined. She told me, "omc, I know you are on a budget. it is much more important to me that you be able to come to my bachelorette party and be in my wedding than bring a gift to my wedding." My point is that if someone''s gift is more important than their presence, then what are you doing inviting them in the first place. Does a card really make a difference to you? Does the card accomplish anything more than saying hello to you and hugging you at the wedding reception?

 

[Dancing Fire]

well....it also takes a lot of nerve to give a wedding couple a 99 cent gift.

 

[omc]

true that!!!!


I think those people fall int othe category of either "why did you invite people like that! (how do you even know them!)" or "man, that crazy old grandma (roll the eyes just like when she gave you a barbie watch for your 18th birthday)" categories

 

[elepri]

I''d think a really cheap gift (like a 99c gift) is worse than no gift at all. At least if you get nothing, you can make excuses for the person, that perhaps they''re clueless or have never been to a wedding and are not familiar with the tradition of giving gifts

. At least that''s what we do for two of my dh''s friends who got us absolutely nothing.

 

[monarch64]

Oh yeah elepri, I agree on the .99 gift. I''m not trying to say there is any excuse for gifts that were obviously in poor taste. I know for our wedding we definitely received a couple "regifts," and one of my husband''s friends gave us our gift(s) almost a year later (I don''t really believe in that year grace period). Sometimes people can''t get away with "it''s the thought that counts." They are just being downright stingy or lazy. But I just can''t gripe about monetary gifts that seem small in comparison to what you thought you should get.

 

[Dancing Fire]

Date: 11/15/2005 5:09:49 PM
Author: monarch64
My father gave us a set amount of money for the cost of our wedding, and we trimmed down our guest list to meet that factor and paid for the photographer and flowers ourselves. We certainly weren't going to live beyond our means and expect our guests to pay for it! Sorry I'm being so negative, I just think it's unfair to judge people by the gifts they give you.

lucky you

daddy was willing to pick up the tap.

i guess that's teh old american tradition

the bride's side pays for everything.

 

[Cind11]

When I got married, a friend of mine from college, who had just moved to Texas gave us some kind of wood "thing" with dried flowers meant to be hung on the wall. It was so ugly we dubbed it "The Texas Terror".