Very confused about officiant situation!

[Treasure43]

So FI and I went to meet with an officant and it went very well. The officiant had some examples of ceremonies for us to look at and I fell in love with one. There were also examples of readings and I found one I really loved. I actually almost teared up...I could just see this officant reading these words at our wedding! We discussed fees, they were very reasonable and not due till the wedding day. The officant was very knowledgable and could answer all our questions. She let us know that it is our wedding and she wants it to be how we want it. She''s preformed many weddings and had lots of tips for us and seemed very flexible. We really liked her and we jus seemed to click. She then asked if we wanted her as our officiant. Now I would have said yes but FI and I had agreed beforehand that we would talk about it when we got home and make out decision in the next day or two. I let her know this and things got very akaward. She seemed personally kind of hurt by this and said that she couldn''t guarentee our date (which wasn''t a suprise). Then she said that when people shop for officiants she likes to be the last one interviewed. There was just kind of a tense feeling and she seemed a bit put off we didn''t agree to go with her right away. We both really liked her and wanted her to do our wedding but now we''re kind of confused and don''t know what to do. Any thoughts or imput?

 

[sonnyjane]

My honest opinion is that you did absolutely nothing wrong, and that it's kind of rude to tell you that she prefers to be the last one interviewed, as if YOU were violating HER protocol. People shop around for EVERYTHING when it comes to a wedding, whether it be photos, cakes, flowers, you get the idea. She should be putting her best foot forward. If you think that you really clicked and that she is the best one for the job, then go ahead and use her, but that would leave a sour taste in my mouth!

 

[yssie]

You and FI need to do what you need to do. As long as you were polite in telling her that you need to talk about it together - I don''t think you were in any way rude or out of line, and it''s too bad she took it personally, but that''s neither your fault nor your problem. Hiring an officiant - even for something as romantic as a wedding - is still a business transaction

 

[Treasure43]

Date: 3/9/2010 8:52:43 PM
Author: sonnyjane
My honest opinion is that you did absolutely nothing wrong, and that it''s kind of rude to tell you that she prefers to be the last one interviewed, as if YOU were violating HER protocol. People shop around for EVERYTHING when it comes to a wedding, whether it be photos, cakes, flowers, you get the idea. She should be putting her best foot forward. If you think that you really clicked and that she is the best one for the job, then go ahead and use her, but that would leave a sour taste in my mouth!

I think that''s the problem. We really clicked and I really want her to do our wedding but it did leave me feeling kinda confused. Maybe we should sleep on it and see how we feel tomorrow.