Theater Etiquette

[KimberlyH]

My husband and I are subscibers to our local theater and attend plays about once a month locally and manage to see a show or two whenever we travel. I am often amazed at the behavior of other patrons, such as the following:

Entering the theater late, or getting up in the middle of the show.
Talking.
Cell phone use (text messaging, ringing, etc.).
Bringing children who are too young to sit through a show.
And the last, and least offensive but still bothersome, dressing like they're going to clean the yard, not attend a play. The traditionalist in me comes out when it comes to the performing arts. Even my jean lovin' husband, it takes some sweet talkin' to get him into much else, will don some slacks and a nice sweater, without a word from me, to attend a play.

These things happen in every city we've been to, from San Diego to New York. So it's not a small town theater thing.

And then we went to the movies twice this weekend. And I was amazed at the amount of talking, text messaging, moving around, and beer drinking that went on. At the first movie and older couple (60s I'd guess) discussed the movie throughout the entire show. The man didn't understand the concept of whispering and I could hear, very clearly, every word he said. His wife was having a hard time grasping what was going on and he was attempting to give her a play by play. Last night we went to a show and two groups of teenagers proceeded to get hammered and disrupt the entire theater. The ushers did nothing. Empty beer bottles were literally rolling down the aisle.

So are my theater going expectations too high? Is it now acceptable to have to distract those around you with your cell phone glare, text message beeps and ringing and people talking and moving around constantly? Is this part of our fast paced society that people can't still still, quietly, for a few hours and enjoy the entertainment they've paid for? I'm truly baffled by this and can't stop thinking about it today. Maybe I've been on vacation too long

 

[Mara]

HA HA Kimi your post totally rings a bell with me because we go to the ballet about 2x a year. It never fails, but people always bring their kids who are way too young to even care about the show, and then those who leave cell phones on OR answer them! The last experience was at the Nutcracker, which granted can be considered a children friendly show. Except it''s at like 7:30pm, and we are in $100 seats. It never fails, there are always a ton of kids around us. Behind us this time were FOUR children all under the age of 5. A few of them were into it, but the other 2 were just seriously restless and asking questions of each other, talking to the parents, kicking the chairs. I seriously was sitting there thinking, where does it end? Like what is appropriate and what is not? To me, $20 balcony seats are appropriate for children under 5 and their parents. Not $100 seats where you figure that people are probably pretty serious about wanting to see and experience the ballet and HEAR the orchestra, not your children. And the parents totally tune it out....all the people looking at them, the kids talking to them.

Many times I feel like there''s no actual hope to have anything be different. Parents nowadays seem so oblivious to what is respectful to others...and more about what THEY want to do and satisfying their own needs rather than stopping to think about being a parent and doing what is right by their children AND other people around them.

 

[baby monster]

I stopped going to the movies a few years ago when cell phones became really widespread. People have no manners and are inconsiderate of others. The only place people seem to still behave appropriately is the opera.

 

[ringabling]

I concur!

I took my 6 yr old little girl to the Nutcracker this winter and we had fantastic mezzanine seats, no seats behind us and we were in real chairs, like at a nice dinner table so it was really comfy.
About 20 minutes into it I hear some odd rustling behind me, odd immediately because it's empty behind us and the next row is up one more balcony level.
I turn and look and it's 2 women standing there. . . just loitering about watching the show. I keep hearing her shoes click on the floor, taking off her coat, etc. . . it was so distracting!!! I chose those seats and paid a premium for this reason!

I thought any normal person would get the clue when the person keeps turning around and kind of staring at her/them. . . but nope!

At intermission the door attendant noticed as she steps in just before so she can open the door for everyone and asks them to leave. FINALLY!
Some people have zero tact.

 

[AmberGretchen]

OMG Kim, this is one of mine and DH''s pet peeves. Some of my recent favorite extreme examples include the following:

1. someone''s cell phone ringing in a movie, they answered it, and proceeded to have a conversation, ON THEIR CELL PHONE, in the MOVIE THEATER, DURING THE MOVIE

2. DH and I went to the Nutcracker at SF Ballet last year, and there was a young adult girl (probably about 12 years old, give or take), sitting behind me. She was kicking my seat quite vigorously. I turned around a couple of times to look at her, then, when she didn''t stop, I turned around and politely requested that she stop kicking my seat. She did not. When I turned around again to say something, her mother, seated next to her, said "you know, she has a mother, you can talk to me if you have a problem." To which I replied "Could you please ask your daughter to stop kicking my seat, its very uncomfortable" in my most polite voice. I turned back around, and the woman turned to her daughter, and said, loud enough for the entire section to hear "I guess you better stop kicking because that mean, rude lady said so." SERIOUSLY?!?!!!

3. A couple of years ago at a concert at the Tweeter center in Massachusetts, a group of guys smoking cigarettes and cigars, despite numerous posted signs saying that the area was "NO Smoking." I politely asked them to stop, and they threatened me and were extremely rude. So I asked an usher to help, explaining the situation, and he shrugged, blew me off, and refused to do anything, and when I pointed out the signs said "well, we don''t really enforce that." I almost had to go to the emergency room I had such a bad asthma attack.

There are so many more I could share, but suffice it to say I completely agree with you. Everywhere it seems that people have completely lost their sense of common courtesy and respect.

Its really a particular problem in theaters and other public places (airplanes come to mind - oh the things that happen there...), and I don''t think you are at all out of line to complain about these behaviors - they are really outrageous, and I find it continually baffling that people think its OK to be so rude to others in public spaces.

 

[KimberlyH]

I thought of you when I wrote this Mara. We saw Phantom in Chicago in December, we had seats in the 4th row. In front of us were two mom with daughters no older than 6 carrying their American Girl dolls. They were very good about not talking, but the show is a bit much for a 6 year old both comprehension-wise and because there are parts that would be scary to a child and the girls kept changing seats, sitting on their mom''s laps, etc. It was nonstop commotion through the show.

On the other hand, we see A Christmas Carol at The Goodman in Chicago every year, the first time we went a 5 year old sat next to me. She was the most well behaved child I have ever encountered (and as a substitute teacher I encounter quite a few!). She was polite to me, sat through the show, etc.

I just wish parents considered the show and their child''s maturity and age when decided to take them.

I go to a fair amount of shows, about 15 a year, and with the exception of two times (both at seeing A Christmas Carol) we have had at least one disruptive person seated directly around us. We saw Hamlet over the summer and the 25 year old next to me spent the entire 3 hours text messaging, with his phone slanted towards me so his companion wouldn''t be bothered. Thanks!

bm, I love going to the movies, when I was in my late teens/early 20s my sister and I went at least once a week. Now my husband and I go once every couple of months. The rainy weekend was a great opportunity for us to catch up a bit this weekend. But our experiences make me not want to go back, no matter how much I love it.

ring, not catching on to "the look" is beyond me too. People just be so wrapped up in their own worlds.

 

[AmberGretchen]

Kim and others - I just had another thought and I''d be curious to hear others'' opinions on it. When DH and I were in London for our honeymoon last year, we went to see a few shows and we had quite a different experience over there - people were much more polite and respectful, and we didn''t have any problems that I can remember. Now obviously 3 shows does not a scientifically representative sample make, but I wonder if others have had the same or similar experience in other countries vs. America, or even specifically in Britain, and I wonder what the reasons might be if this is the case?

DH and I don''t really go to movies either for the same reason as others in this thread. We have a fairly large TV at home and find we would much rather just wait for most things to come out on DVD and add them to our Netflix list...

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 1/7/2008 2:44:49 PM
Author: AmberGretchen
OMG Kim, this is one of mine and DH''s pet peeves. Some of my recent favorite extreme examples include the following:

1. someone''s cell phone ringing in a movie, they answered it, and proceeded to have a conversation, ON THEIR CELL PHONE, in the MOVIE THEATER, DURING THE MOVIE

2. DH and I went to the Nutcracker at SF Ballet last year, and there was a young adult girl (probably about 12 years old, give or take), sitting behind me. She was kicking my seat quite vigorously. I turned around a couple of times to look at her, then, when she didn''t stop, I turned around and politely requested that she stop kicking my seat. She did not. When I turned around again to say something, her mother, seated next to her, said ''you know, she has a mother, you can talk to me if you have a problem.'' To which I replied ''Could you please ask your daughter to stop kicking my seat, its very uncomfortable'' in my most polite voice. I turned back around, and the woman turned to her daughter, and said, loud enough for the entire section to hear ''I guess you better stop kicking because that mean, rude lady said so.'' SERIOUSLY?!?!!!

3. A couple of years ago at a concert at the Tweeter center in Massachusetts, a group of guys smoking cigarettes and cigars, despite numerous posted signs saying that the area was ''NO Smoking.'' I politely asked them to stop, and they threatened me and were extremely rude. So I asked an usher to help, explaining the situation, and he shrugged, blew me off, and refused to do anything, and when I pointed out the signs said ''well, we don''t really enforce that.'' I almost had to go to the emergency room I had such a bad asthma attack.

There are so many more I could share, but suffice it to say I completely agree with you. Everywhere it seems that people have completely lost their sense of common courtesy and respect.

Its really a particular problem in theaters and other public places (airplanes come to mind - oh the things that happen there...), and I don''t think you are at all out of line to complain about these behaviors - they are really outrageous, and I find it continually baffling that people think its OK to be so rude to others in public spaces.

The funny thing is, I''m the anti-complainer, according to DH. I don''t send food back in restaurants, I don''t complain about bad service, etc. It drives my husband crazy because I never come home and say "I had a bad day" or "That really irritates me" or "So and so is bugging me." I find complaining counterproductive; J claims it''s a favorite American pasttime and claims I''m un-American because I won''t join in.

I just don''t understand why people would spend good money on something they don''t even fully enjoy. I was beyond irritated last night. So much so that I pushed past the drunk kids and told them "MOVE!" when we were exiting the theater. It was totally childish of me and didn''t solve a damn thing (my husband was totally stunned, he was like "I thought you were mad at me. I''ve never seen you act that way before!") but I was just so angry! I missed the last 5 minutes of the movie beause the cackler and her drunk buddies couldn''t control herself.

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 1/7/2008 2:54:41 PM
Author: AmberGretchen
Kim and others - I just had another thought and I''d be curious to hear others'' opinions on it. When DH and I were in London for our honeymoon last year, we went to see a few shows and we had quite a different experience over there - people were much more polite and respectful, and we didn''t have any problems that I can remember. Now obviously 3 shows does not a scientifically representative sample make, but I wonder if others have had the same or similar experience in other countries vs. America, or even specifically in Britain, and I wonder what the reasons might be if this is the case?

DH and I don''t really go to movies either for the same reason as others in this thread. We have a fairly large TV at home and find we would much rather just wait for most things to come out on DVD and add them to our Netflix list...

Having never travelled abroad I know nothing about this firsthand. I have read several articles in the NY Times that discuss this issue (stragglers who are angry that they have to watch the beginning of the show on closed circuit TV, etc.) and my understanding is that it is much different in Europe than it is here. I think we''ve lost our reverance for live performance because so many people are exposed to the crazy technological advancements made in movies and tv and it just doesn''t move fast enough for Americans. Perhaps I should move to Britain.

The other thing that blows me away now...snack bars in theatres. You do not need popcorn when watching a live show! And I don''t want to hear your bag rustling, and you chewing like a cow with cud.

 

[Kaleigh]

We just went to NYC to see Wicked. Loved it!! BUT the people behind us talked constantly. Really pissed me off.

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 1/7/2008 3:03:31 PM
Author: Kaleigh
We just went to NYC to see Wicked. Loved it!! BUT the people behind us talked constantly. Really pissed me off.

Wasn't it amazing, Lisa! I guess that's part of what I don't understand, I am so in awe of live theater and so enjoy a good movie (but not as nearly as much as live performances) that I can't imagine wanting to miss a moment of what is going on. I get so caught up in the story, the staging, the musicians, the costumes (even if the play isn't great) that I don't get not wanting to just sit, relax and enjoy.

 

[bee*]

It''s funny you should bring this up now as my family was talking about this last night as we''re going to see Mamma Mia in NY on Thursday. It irritates me so much that people talk/rattle papers etc when they''re at the theater. I also think it''s nice to dress up a little when you''re going so I told my little sister to leave her miniskirt at home

We have two friends who we were at the cinema a couple of weeks ago and the whole way through, they were texting on their phones and getting up to go answer them outside. It was so irritating that D and I said that we''d never go to the cinema with them again.

 

[bee*]

Date: 1/7/2008 2:44:49 PM
Author: AmberGretchen



2. DH and I went to the Nutcracker at SF Ballet last year, and there was a young adult girl (probably about 12 years old, give or take), sitting behind me. She was kicking my seat quite vigorously. I turned around a couple of times to look at her, then, when she didn''t stop, I turned around and politely requested that she stop kicking my seat. She did not. When I turned around again to say something, her mother, seated next to her, said ''you know, she has a mother, you can talk to me if you have a problem.'' To which I replied ''Could you please ask your daughter to stop kicking my seat, its very uncomfortable'' in my most polite voice. I turned back around, and the woman turned to her daughter, and said, loud enough for the entire section to hear ''I guess you better stop kicking because that mean, rude lady said so.'' SERIOUSLY?!?!!!

No way! I can''t believe that woman said that

Unbelievable

 

[Po10472]

If someone is being loud in the theatre or cinema I shoosh them.......if that doesn''t work, then I ask them politely to stop........if that doesn''t work, I go get an usher and let them deal with it.........and so on until the manager gets involved then I demand a refund of my ticket. I''m not putting up with crap like that.

My DH and I went to see I am Legend the other week and its a movie where there''s not a lot of talking in it and its all about atmosphere etc and this donkey who didn''t really have a brain in his tiny head, had his phone on and it kept ringing and he kept going out, talking loudly which of course was starting to pee everyone off cos it changed the movie experience. So this woman sitting across the aisle from me calmly got out of her chair, walked over to where he was sitting talking loudly to his girl, whispered something in his ear and returned to her seat, cool as a cucumber. He never uttered another word. I''d love to have known what she said to him cos it worked.

There are always those selfish enough to spoil others fun.

 

[steph72276]

This is such a pet peeve of mine too! I get really frustrated when parents bring children into non-child friendly movies. I remember going to see Harry Potter and some parents brought in a baby! As in still in a carseat carrier thing! And the baby cried and the parents simply tuned it out. Ugh, I am the parent of a 3 year old and I would never take him to something other than a kiddie movie and even then, I only go during the day and if he gets restless, we leave! I just don''t understand, I mean I feel like I pay for a babysitter or just wait until the movie comes out on DVD, why can''t others have that same level of respect for others?

 

[MichelleCarmen]

As a parent, I have to agree with you 100% about other kids! lol My husband and I ALWAYS make sure to bring the boys together IF we think the movie possibly will make my 5 YO squirm and one of us has to leave with him!

It's annoying when a person brings a BABY, too. How likely is it that a baby is going to sleep quietly through a loud 2-hour movie?

Locally, we have theaters which have show times set up just for families. All the kids can talk together.

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 1/7/2008 3:16:44 PM
Author: KimberlyH

Date: 1/7/2008 3:03:31 PM
Author: Kaleigh
We just went to NYC to see Wicked. Loved it!! BUT the people behind us talked constantly. Really pissed me off.

Wasn''t it amazing, Lisa! I guess that''s part of what I don''t understand, I am so in awe of live theater and so enjoy a good movie (but not as nearly as much as live performances) that I can''t imagine wanting to miss a moment of what is going on. I get so caught up in the story, the staging, the musicians, the costumes (even if the play isn''t great) that I don''t get not wanting to just sit, relax and enjoy.

Kimi,
Yes it was, just the best show ever!! Methinks the people behind us had seen it before, but still. I would be mesmerzied no matter how many times I had seen it.

 

[strmrdr]

yea its pretty bad, I never go too movies anymore.
A buddy of mine had a good way of dealing with it.
He would turned too the Dad and tell him that if his kids didn't knock it off he was going to leave in a stretcher.
They left so it worked.

 

[Haven]

I choose my movie theatres very wisely, some of them have horrible atmospheres with a lot of talking, and others are quite lovely. Whenever there''s talking in the theatre the teacher comes out in me and I politely yet sternly implore the offenders to be quiet. If they don''t listen the first time, I calmly tell them I''m going out to fetch an usher, and the usher usually takes care of the problem.

As for plays, fortunately, I haven''t noticed much rudeness in the theatres I''ve been to in Chicago, and I love attending the theatre in England. I''m sorry to hear that so many people have had such awful experiences, a play is a horrible thing to waste!

 

[Sparkster]

KimberlyH, All items except for your last one bother me as it doesn''t affect me personally.

I remember going to see "Something''s Gotta Give" with my FI and sister. I sat in the middle of them and next to my sister was a man who kept on farting!!. My FI could smell it and he was 3 seats away from him. It wasn''t just one fart either, it was constant. Luckily it wasn''t a packed cinema so we moved seats.

 

[Miranda]

Ack!! These are some of my pet peeves, too! Especially the things people wear to plays! We saw Wicked at the Pantages in Nov. I could not believe the junky clothes people were wearing. Some folks had sweats on. Others had strange goth costumes. I *know* I was in LA and I *know* I was at the Pantages, but, cummon, throw on some slacks and a sweater...I''d even settle for a trouser jean!!!!!

Oh and small kids at an evening ballet performance is just nuts! I took DD to see the Nutcracker in Dec. for the first time. Of course we went to a 2:00 performance. She''s almost 5 and I was certain she would sit through the entire thing, but, if she wouldn''t I would not hesitate to leave. Behind us sat much older children and their whining mother. I don''t know what was worse, the quarrelsome kids or their mother begging them endlessly to stop their banter...It was maddening! Here I was with my 5 year old that could behave better than kids that appeared to be 10 and 13. I am endlessly appalled by the parenting (or lack of) by some people. Uh-Oh here I go on a rant! LOL!

Wait a minute, Kimberly, do you mean people were drinking alcohol at the movie theatre? As in seeing National Treasure or something of the like? I didn''t even know alcohol was allowed in theatres. Then again I don''t go much. The last time I went we took DD to see Ratatouile. It was her first experience at the movies and she hated it. We didn''t stay long and haven''t been back.

 

[lyra]

Actually, I find all those behaviours totally unacceptable. For the plays/operas that we''ve been too, everyone dresses. I go to the movies often with my oldest daughter, and even go to different theatres and have never had major disruptions. Weird, huh? Drinking beer in a movie, that would never happen or be allowed to go on in my local theatres. They''re actually very strict about everything. Only once at one particular theatre I was annoyed by some teens in front of us laughing too much at a horror movie. The most offensive thing that happened very recently was the woman sitting directly in front of us was just drowning in perfume.

My daughter and I were so glad to get out of there! But secretly I wondered what scent it was, and just how much she put on to make it last so strongly throughout the 2 hour show.

 

[AmberGretchen]

Date: 1/7/2008 3:25:29 PM
Author: bee*

Date: 1/7/2008 2:44:49 PM

Author: AmberGretchen




2. DH and I went to the Nutcracker at SF Ballet last year, and there was a young adult girl (probably about 12 years old, give or take), sitting behind me. She was kicking my seat quite vigorously. I turned around a couple of times to look at her, then, when she didn''t stop, I turned around and politely requested that she stop kicking my seat. She did not. When I turned around again to say something, her mother, seated next to her, said ''you know, she has a mother, you can talk to me if you have a problem.'' To which I replied ''Could you please ask your daughter to stop kicking my seat, its very uncomfortable'' in my most polite voice. I turned back around, and the woman turned to her daughter, and said, loud enough for the entire section to hear ''I guess you better stop kicking because that mean, rude lady said so.'' SERIOUSLY?!?!!!

No way! I can''t believe that woman said that

Unbelievable

Oh believe it - my DH and I were pretty shocked. Then when we talked about it during the intermission, we couldn''t help but start giggling - I mean, when someone is that out of line, what else are you going to do, right?? Of course we stopped when the show started again, but I think the lady was annoyed when she came back from buying her daughter like 3 lbs of candy at the intermission (which, you guessed it, she crinkled almost non-stop during the 2nd half of the show) and found us laughing, even though she couldn''t have known we were laughing about her.

 

[Mara]

We don't go to the movies that often anymore mostly because it irritates me how clueless other people are about those around them. It's much nicer to watch a DVD at home where we can control the environment. But sometimes we will go in the afternoons when it's less crowded.

Along the same lines as you mentioned is people chewing or eating...earlier this year during Sleeping Beauty Ballet in SF we had this experience where this woman and her child were at the end of the row behind us, like 3 seats over to our left, again these were like $70 seats and they are opening CANDY in rustling cellophane paper and eating. It was driving me friggin BATTY. This is the BALLET. There's no speaking from the characters, so I certainly don't want to hear anyone else making noises. I end up leaning over behind us and saying SHHHH in a really loud voice. Well this guy next to me looks at me and goes 'It's just a little girl'. OMG I almost had a fit. I wasn't shhhing the girl, but the Mother who should really know better. But regardless, just because she's a child, she gets a special pass? I don't subscribe to that way of thinking...children should be taught the right way to act by their parents and the Mom was being a bad example. I looked at the dude and don't even remember what I said but it was something along the lines of 'Are you serious, this is the ballet...I don't come here to hear people rustle and talk.' He actually told me to 'Shut Up!' I just glared at him. I mean I wasn't going to get into an altercation at the BALLET...but seriously. I feel like (a) people are inconsiderate of others and (b) others just tolerate it..and this perpetuates the behavior. Again, this was an 8pm show on a Saturday night. They have 12pm shows on Sundays which I feel are more appropriate for children. I don't think I am totally unreasonable. If I was at the NOON show for families and sitting in the balcony area, I would expect more commotion.

Oh and this family who brought 4 kids to the Nutcracker this time paid $100+ for each of their kids seats. And trust me, the kids did not care! They could have been in the $20 balcony and been happy. The youngest ones also kept complaining they couldn't SEE...the parents should have had them on their laps. I don't mind kids when they are well behaved, some kids are really exemplary. But others...the parents should know that they aren't going to be able to sit there for 2 hours or whatever and act appropriately.

People farting, don't get me started. At the GYM this happens all the time. I understand bodily functions, you are working out etc, but when it happens AGAIN AND AGAIN? Go to the friggin bathroom! Have some respect for people around you. Also those people SINGING while they work out ? I don't want to hear you singing while I am suffering on the elliptical.

 

[orbaya]

The same goes for airplane etiquette.

On a flight from Las Vegas to Boston, we had a mother and two little girls (probably age 8 and 10 or so) directly in front of us, and the father was in the aisle seat across from them. The kids kept pushing the attendant button for no reason and you could tell the attendants were getting irritated. The girls were fighting and yelling at each other and keeping other passengers awake. The parents never said a word. I had finally had it and said VERY loudly to hubby, "if the parents don''t say something to their kids, I will". Right after that the mother tried (poorly, at that) to shush the kids up. Once we landed I went to the ladies room in the airport and it was very loud in there. Turns out it was those girls. Hubby was waiting for me outside the bathroom and I came out and said to him, "those girls don''t how to be quiet." Hubby told me that their father was standing right next to him. I didn''t care. Call me a biotch, but I had had enough!

Another plane story was when we were getting off the plane, a woman from the back of the plane was yelling for people to get out of the way because she has was having trouble breathing. We got off the plane and saw the woman smoking.

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 1/7/2008 4:41:10 PM
Author: Miranda

Wait a minute, Kimberly, do you mean people were drinking alcohol at the movie theatre? As in seeing National Treasure or something of the like? I didn't even know alcohol was allowed in theatres. Then again I don't go much. The last time I went we took DD to see Ratatouile. It was her first experience at the movies and she hated it. We didn't stay long and haven't been back.

Yup, Miranda, they were drinking beer in the movie theater; lots of it, tops were popping every few minutes. And then a few empty bottles were knocked over and rolled down the aisle and someone from across the theater announced "That's why you bring cans!" which set off the cackler and ruined the last 5 minutes of the movie. You aren't allowed to drink at the movies, you shouldn't be drinking at 16 either, yet they were. I felt so safe watching them get in their cars after the show.

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 1/7/2008 4:24:57 PM
Author: Sparkster
KimberlyH, All items except for your last one bother me as it doesn''t affect me personally.

I remember going to see ''Something''s Gotta Give'' with my FI and sister. I sat in the middle of them and next to my sister was a man who kept on farting!!. My FI could smell it and he was 3 seats away from him. It wasn''t just one fart either, it was constant. Luckily it wasn''t a packed cinema so we moved seats.

In comparison the way someone dresses isn''t a big deal, I just think it''s the theatre and there should be a certain respect for the art that includes dressing nicely and behaving appropriately that should go hand-in-hand with the whole experience.

 

[bee*]

Date: 1/7/2008 4:44:22 PM
Author: AmberGretchen

Date: 1/7/2008 3:25:29 PM

Author: bee*

Date: 1/7/2008 2:44:49 PM


Author: AmberGretchen





2. DH and I went to the Nutcracker at SF Ballet last year, and there was a young adult girl (probably about 12 years old, give or take), sitting behind me. She was kicking my seat quite vigorously. I turned around a couple of times to look at her, then, when she didn''t stop, I turned around and politely requested that she stop kicking my seat. She did not. When I turned around again to say something, her mother, seated next to her, said ''you know, she has a mother, you can talk to me if you have a problem.'' To which I replied ''Could you please ask your daughter to stop kicking my seat, its very uncomfortable'' in my most polite voice. I turned back around, and the woman turned to her daughter, and said, loud enough for the entire section to hear ''I guess you better stop kicking because that mean, rude lady said so.'' SERIOUSLY?!?!!!

No way! I can''t believe that woman said that

Unbelievable

Oh believe it - my DH and I were pretty shocked. Then when we talked about it during the intermission, we couldn''t help but start giggling - I mean, when someone is that out of line, what else are you going to do, right?? Of course we stopped when the show started again, but I think the lady was annoyed when she came back from buying her daughter like 3 lbs of candy at the intermission (which, you guessed it, she crinkled almost non-stop during the 2nd half of the show) and found us laughing, even though she couldn''t have known we were laughing about her.

Some people have no cop-on at all! I hate the crinkling when I''m trying to watch something!

 

[Miranda]

Date: 1/7/2008 4:46:18 PM
Author: Mara
We don''t go to the movies that often anymore mostly because it irritates me how clueless other people are about those around them. It''s much nicer to watch a DVD at home where we can control the environment. But sometimes we will go in the afternoons when it''s less crowded.

Along the same lines as you mentioned is people chewing or eating...earlier this year during Sleeping Beauty Ballet in SF we had this experience where this woman and her child were at the end of the row behind us, like 3 seats over to our left, again these were like $70 seats and they are opening CANDY in rustling cellophane paper and eating. It was driving me friggin BATTY. This is the BALLET. There''s no speaking from the characters, so I certainly don''t want to hear anyone else making noises. I end up leaning over behind us and saying SHHHH in a really loud voice. Well this guy next to me looks at me and goes ''It''s just a little girl''. OMG I almost had a fit. I wasn''t shhhing the girl, but the Mother who should really know better. But regardless, just because she''s a child, she gets a special pass? I don''t subscribe to that way of thinking...children should be taught the right way to act by their parents and the Mom was being a bad example. I looked at the dude and don''t even remember what I said but it was something along the lines of ''Are you serious, this is the ballet...I don''t come here to hear people rustle and talk.'' He actually told me to ''Shut Up!'' I just glared at him. I mean I wasn''t going to get into an altercation at the BALLET...but seriously. I feel like (a) people are inconsiderate of others and (b) others just tolerate it..and this perpetuates the behavior. Again, this was an 8pm show on a Saturday night. They have 12pm shows on Sundays which I feel are more appropriate for children. I don''t think I am totally unreasonable. If I was at the NOON show for families and sitting in the balcony area, I would expect more commotion.

Oh and this family who brought 4 kids to the Nutcracker this time paid $100+ for each of their kids seats. And trust me, the kids did not care! They could have been in the $20 balcony and been happy. The youngest ones also kept complaining they couldn''t SEE...the parents should have had them on their laps. I don''t mind kids when they are well behaved, some kids are really exemplary. But others...the parents should know that they aren''t going to be able to sit there for 2 hours or whatever and act appropriately.

People farting, don''t get me started. At the GYM this happens all the time. I understand bodily functions, you are working out etc, but when it happens AGAIN AND AGAIN? Go to the friggin bathroom! Have some respect for people around you. Also those people SINGING while they work out ? I don''t want to hear you singing while I am suffering on the elliptical.

LOL LOL LOL!!! People fart at the gym????????? Ewww Ewww! Are you serious? I guess I don''t get out much and I do work out at home so this is something I''ve never ever heard of or thought about. I cannot believe people just fart at the gym...Not even in the bathroom??? Bleck! Gross and rude!

Mara, you should write a parenting book. I swear these things you speak of are common sense, common courtesy ideas that many parents just don''t get! Then again, naughty children are my #1 pet peeve. Wait a minute, make that, my #1 pet peeve is the PARENTS of naughty children.

 

[KimberlyH]

Date: 1/7/2008 4:04:57 PM
Author: Haven
I choose my movie theatres very wisely, some of them have horrible atmospheres with a lot of talking, and others are quite lovely. Whenever there''s talking in the theatre the teacher comes out in me and I politely yet sternly implore the offenders to be quiet. If they don''t listen the first time, I calmly tell them I''m going out to fetch an usher, and the usher usually takes care of the problem.

As for plays, fortunately, I haven''t noticed much rudeness in the theatres I''ve been to in Chicago, and I love attending the theatre in England. I''m sorry to hear that so many people have had such awful experiences, a play is a horrible thing to waste!

Haven, can I go to the movies with you?

A play is a terrible thing to waste.

Do you have that fantastic ability to tune people out? My sister and husband do, but I just can''t manage it.