The Official TTC Thread!

[Independent Gal]

Oh Amber. I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better. Just know we''re all thinking of you, sweety.

Hi am04 and welcome. Tell us a bit about yourself!

Happy knitting and happy new cycles for the rest of you.

 

[lovelylulu]

amber - i'm sorry that TTC has been such a difficult experience and I completely get needing a break - but just remember this thread isn't just for the happy, enthusiastic, optimistic days...it's also a place that you can turn to for support through the darker times as well. we fellow TTC'ers understand how you're feeling *hugs*

hi pandora!! welcome!! hope that you get some answers soon! and I agree with you - who ever invented the POAS tests must be making quite the pretty penny!!! unfortunately I don't have a convenient dollar store nearby, but i know a number of ladies on this board have recommended picking up tests from a place like that -- same results for a lot less $$

hi am04 and welcome to the wonderful world of TTC

sounds like we'll have a lot of company during the dreaded *knitting* time! Good luck!!

 

[happy in love]

Welcome to am04 and Pandora! Hope your stay here is short and sweet!

Amber- I am so sorry you are feeling down. I understand if you need to stay away for a bit, but like Lulu said, we are here to support through good times and bad

.

As for me, 3DPO but pretty sure we''re just waiting for AF. BD was fine till my OPK was positive, and then for some reason we were just burned out. We decided that next month we are going to wait for the positive lines before we start DTD to try to relieve some of the pressure. There is still a chance I suppose, thurs was the last BD and O was saturday, but like I said, not getting any hopes up!

Mela- hope this is it for you cycle buddy!

To everyone else... keep on truckin''! Hope all is well

 

[blushingbride]

Amber - I understand too (even though we didn't officially start until last month)...it's hard to hear everyone around you becoming pregnant.

I was on the phone with my friend last night who informed me of another friend who was now pregnant. This friend was TTCing while away on vacation and got pregnant right away. It was hard to hear since we wanted to conceive while on vacation too, but it didn't happen for us.

I love how you are always our comic relief...sometimes when our cycles don't go as planned, you always seem to know the right words to say to make us laugh and set us straight. Just know, you will be missed so, come back soon!

We'll be here whenever you need us!

LL - ugh...that's so frustrating knowing that your DH will be away during your BDing days. How long will he be away and is it possible to cover your bases before and after his trip or is his trip smack dap in the middle of the prime BDing days? I ususally O around CD 20, so I'll be BDing from the 12th on. Although I think you really only need to BD 6 days prior to O - not 8. Correct??

What's everyone's strategies? I know we've talked about this before, but I'm curious. I think people seem to have had the most success with BDing everyday leading up to O, BDing on O and then the day after.

No worries about sounding like a broken record - I find that I repeat myself a lot here too.

Sometimes it's good to refresh our memories since this thread moves fast.

Mela - sending lots of baby dust your way! I hope that all Croatian's have "supersperm"...lol...if that's the case, we're in good shape!

Hilarious... Well, here's to getting KTFU!

am04 - welcome to group! Looks like you, LL and myself are all on CD4! Woohoo!!

 

[mela lu]

Oh Amber - I echo what BB said about you being our comic relief. You add such a great dose of humour and humility to this thread. As much as I understand the need to take a break, I do hope you re-consider and come back extra soon

. Thinking of you...


BB - as for our strategy, the first time we tried, (and I got knocked-up) we DTD the night before O day only. that worked. This cycle, we DTD two days before O, the day before O, skipped O day, and then the day after O. This is all said with the disclaimer that I wasn''t temping, thus not 100% sure that O occured when I think it did.

I''m CD19, presumably 5DPO. Time will tell.

Hi to everyone else

 

[erica k]

Amber, I''m so sorry to hear how frustrating TTCing has been for you. Being an accidental jerkstore who doesn''t really know anyone else who''s pregnant or trying in real life, I can''t really say anything that we''re all here to support you no matter what. For me, it''s humbling to hear about women who have gone through so much and waited so long for a baby. You''ll be sorely missed if you need to take a break, but I can understand how difficult it can be to live, breathe, think TTC (or anything else that you''re really hoping for but isn''t working out just yet).

 

[am04]

Date: 8/5/2008 8:40:29 AM
Author: Independent Gal
Oh Amber. I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better. Just know we''re all thinking of you, sweety.


Hi am04 and welcome. Tell us a bit about yourself!

Happy knitting and happy new cycles for the rest of you.

Thanks for for the welcome everyone! I''m a health services researcher living in SoCal. I love reading, swimming and cooking. I''ve been lurking on pricescope since we started looking at engagement rings (around 2 years ago), which is why I feel like I already know a bit about all of you! DH and I just celebrated our one year anniversary and are looking forward to expanding our family, but I have to admit that I am a little worried about the pressure. It has taken all our friends over a year to conceive so I am trying to prepare myself for the journey. I am a planner by nature so I''m sure this process is going to be quite the learning/growing experience for me!

 

[am04]

Date: 8/5/2008 9:04:08 AM
Author: lovelylulu
amber - i''m sorry that TTC has been such a difficult experience and I completely get needing a break - but just remember this thread isn''t just for the happy, enthusiastic, optimistic days...it''s also a place that you can turn to for support through the darker times as well. we fellow TTC''ers understand how you''re feeling *hugs*


hi pandora!! welcome!! hope that you get some answers soon! and I agree with you - who ever invented the POAS tests must be making quite the pretty penny!!! unfortunately I don''t have a convenient dollar store nearby, but i know a number of ladies on this board have recommended picking up tests from a place like that -- same results for a lot less $$


hi am04 and welcome to the wonderful world of TTC

sounds like we''ll have a lot of company during the dreaded *knitting* time! Good luck!!

Thanks for the welcome! I don''t have a dollar store near me either...I''ve been buying opk strips at http://www.early-pregnancy-tests.com. Very cheap and free shipping if you spend a certain amount.

 

[am04]

Amber- I just wanted to say that I don''t think you are being selfish, just human. I''m sending lots positive thoughts your way. Take care of yourself!

 

[lisa1.01fvs1]

For all those who got auntie - ss! She really is uninvited! Dare I say mean?

Amber - I hear ya on the TTC burn-out/depression and in general feeling infantile about the BFP''s in the world!
After a while I felt like, well what else do I have to say about this stuff? I''m on cd__, BD__ # of times, I O''d on__, now in TWW, blah, blah, blah......

Not to minimize things guys but I too felt frustrated and defeated. It really takes it''s toll in a not so quiet fashion sometimes.

Amber, I know we started on this board around the same time and I think that was many moons ago!

Here''s to a healthy break and to an even better return.

Lisa

 

[littlelysser]

Amber - I totally feel you. I generally find that for a bit after I get AFF, I just don't have the heart to post much. So I understand, but I'd be very sad if you left. And really and truly, try not to be too down. My BFF tried to get prego over a year, tried IVF (her DH has a really low sperm count), and once they decided to not worry about it a for a while...she got prego with her amazing and wonderful daugter, Mae. So don't give up hope! And your awesome-osity was one of the reasons I decided to delurk on this board. You'll be missed!

BB - I'm sorry about AFF. She is just rude and wrong.

HIL - DH and I have the same thing. We often sort of burn out towards the end of the fertile time.

Lulu - I worked for a large international large firm for four years, went to another large firm for about a year and worked for a state appellate court judge for two and a half years. My judge retired in December of 2007 and I decided that I was done with the law as well. I am currently a quasi-jewelry designer. I have several friends that went to D.C. after law school. There are great opportunities there.

Welcome Pandora and Am!

As for me. I'm CD 9. I'm temping this month - just to make sure I'm ovulating and stuffs. Of course, this isn't a very good month for us, as my parents are here househunting and will be here for the next two weeks. And, well, perhaps, TMI, but our bedroom is right next to the guest room...so that will present some challenges, f-statistic wise. SO we shall see.

 

[AmberWaves]

Everyone, thank you so much for all the kind words. I feel like I'm a LIW again, just waiting waiting waiting, not mentioning any of the key words (remember that in LIW? No wedding, rings, diamonds, marriage words all for the fear of jinxing), because the more I talk about them, the more stressed DH gets, the more impatient I get, and the less he wants to talk about it. I swear, if I didn't have this ring on my finger, and wedding pictures around the house I'd think it was 2005 again!

I think it's just a culmination of my cousin's news (I really DO appreciate her telling me personally, not letting me hear via grapevine), with another o-day passing by on Saturday with little lovin' to help fertilize me. We spent a whole weekend running from place to place, standing for 10 hours, that when we finally came home, we instantly fell asleep. I blame myself, and DH for not trying harder for this. Then again, why the hell is it so HARD? Jeez, if I only knew it would be this difficult, I would have gone off that pill ages ago. I blame Health Class in high school. Bunch of lying a-holes. They really should modify those classes, saying, "If you really really want to get pregnant, and plan and plan your sad little hearts out, it's pretty much as good as birth control. Now, for those of you who just choose to have sex randomly, you're pretty much guaranteed a baby- ask Jamie-Lynn, or Ashlee."

It sucks because I don't like this Amber. In fact, I hate this Amber. (wow, saying my name like that makes it sound weird. You don't really say your name very much, ya know?) I don't like being overly introspective, nor do I like doubting myself. To be honest, I really don't like my accidentally pregnant friends telling me that it'll happen when you least expect it (just like LIW again!!!). When you (you in the figurative, not you as in the TTC audience) tell me that you're bummed you got pregnant because you were just starting to love your life- and that's what I should do- and you're making do- it HURTS ME. I already loved my life. I love my husband. I love OUR life together. I don't need to wait for that... I have it. The only thing missing (aside from a million dollars, which would be greatly appreciated) is that tiny, pink, wrinkled piece that will grab my finger when it's rubbed on his cheek.

Dh said to me the other day, that he's really frustrated that it's not happening yet. Trying to be the optimistic one (don't you hate when roles reverse?), I said, "It'll happen when we're ready. When someone up there thinks we're ready for it." Angrily, DH said, "We're ready NOW, we have nothing else to be ready for!" Yes, I know.

So, that's where I am today. A grumpy, tear-stained mess of a girl who is afraid of being the cheese. As in, the cheese stands alone.

Bear with me and my uber long vent- I don't know what came over me.

AM: Welcome to the wonderful world of TTC- as you can see it's quite the ride.

ETA: Perhaps this is for the best right now- I'm supposed to have an MRI done soon, and then ankle surgery followed by a few weeks of a possible air-cast. We're going to Disneyland in October, and I'm supposed to fly to Chicago to visit a friend (anyone here a Chicagoan?). Maybe this is the best timing after all.

 

[Pandora II]

Amber, I''m so sorry that you are feeling this way. I''ve seen friends go through this and it really is hard.

Especially when, as you say, you''ve spent half your life trying NOT to get pregnant.

I really hope you get some good news before long.

I''m sure you''ve had more advice on things to try than you have ever wanted to hear, so I''m just throwing this out there - have you tried having some acupuncture? My father used it a lot for women who were trying to conceive and didn''t have any known problems. It was remarkably successful. If nothing else it''s risk free and worth a shot.

 

[AmberWaves]

pandora, as our insurance does cover acupuncture, perhaps I will give it a try- thank you for the recommendation!

 

[mela lu]

Amber - I have nothing to say but this: (((HUG)))

 

[littlelysser]

Awwwww, Amber. I''m sorry pal! We''ve only been TTC''ing for a couple months, but I definitely understand your frustration.

Interesting that you should mention health class...DH and I were talking recently about how darn hard it is to get prego - now, he is a boy...but still. He (and to some extent I) just sort of assumed it''d happen fast. Yet, it hasn''t. Feh.

Pooooo on it all.

 

[gongjoo143]

Amber,

I just wanted to chime in here. I don''t post often but I read the TTC thread because we are currently trying.

I''m an acupuncturist and I specialize in infertility and women''s health. Acupuncture and herbs are incredibly helpful to regulate the cycle and hormones, increase fertile CM, get rid of spotting, pms and cramps. It can also help male infertility. If you have any questions, please don''t hesitate to contact me.

I''m not sure if I can post my website here but I have many fertility case reports and success stories.

Good luck! It''s frustrating but it''ll happen before you know it.

 

[snlee]

Amber, I just wanted to say sorry you''re having a rough time TTC. I can empathize with what you''re going through. Those months of TTC were tough. I felt like I wasn''t myself and I hated living in 2 week waiting periods - either to try or wait to see if you''re pregnant. As hard as it is, try to stay positive! You are right, maybe this isn''t the right time. We ended up getting pregnant the cycle after our Caribbean vacation. In retrospect, I''m glad it happened that way. With the extreme tiredness and m/s, I wouldn''t have been able to enjoy our trip so it really worked out for the best. *hugs* Hang in there!

 

[erica k]

Date: 8/5/2008 1:56:08 PM
Author: AmberWaves
I blame Health Class in high school. Bunch of lying a-holes. They really should modify those classes, saying, ''If you really really want to get pregnant, and plan and plan your sad little hearts out, it''s pretty much as good as birth control. Now, for those of you who just choose to have sex randomly, you''re pretty much guaranteed a baby- ask Jamie-Lynn, or Ashlee.''

...........

We''re going to Disneyland in October, and I''m supposed to fly to Chicago to visit a friend (anyone here a Chicagoan?). Maybe this is the best timing after all.

For all those random ''accidental'' babies, don''t forget to drink, too. Apparently that worked for me.

I know it''s often hard to see the silver lining, but believe me, it''s no fun at all to visit friends or go on vacation when you''re a bloated, exhausted, nauseated mess. No matter what, when it isn''t happening and when it does happen, there will be both drawbacks and positive aspects. Here I am sinking into a depressive funk because my school is making it difficult for me to be both a good mother and a good student, and you and so many others are trying their best to get pregnant. Sigh.


HUGS!!!!

 

[AmberWaves]

Thanks everyone for all the great vibes and hugs. I''m so sorry to dominate the TTC thread with my "poor-mes"! I''d blog about it, but my family reads it, and I don''t want anyone to be mad or hurt by how I''m feeling, and since I was a blogger on WeddingBee- I can''t write on my other blog because they all get transfered to WeddingBee''s servers. So if I wrote an entry on my Weddingbee linked blog, all of a sudden Mrs. Kiwi would be griping about her family and inability to get pregnant- nationwide.

I''m sure the brides-to-be over there aren''t interested in hearing about a struggle like that!

Alas, my only place to vent is here. So sorry! After a good cry in the shower (a first for me, you should SEE how puffy my eyes are), I''m feeling a little less teary, but still determined on not talking babies for a good month or two. At least, just not with DH. My friend just texted me the results of her big ultrasound, so I have that to enjoy- shopping for someone else''s baby (totally not being sarcastic- I can buy stuff people won''t let me buy myself), who can be spoiled by her Auntie Amber!

Erica: looks like sometimes things just aren''t perfect, huh? I''m really sorry to hear about the crappy treatment you''re getting because you''re pregnant, it''s really just a travesty on the part of the upper educational system. Seems like it''s one or the other, doesn''t it? Ahhhhh. Life. What a tremendous PITA.

 

[blushingbride]

Amber, the good thing is that you're not alone and that a lot of us here share your frustrations. It seems the TTC journey (and what comes afterwards) has LOTS of ups and downs...which is why I love this thread so much. We can vent all we want here and not feel guilty about it...esp. since I've found that whenever I come here to vent, others hear my rant and feel the same exact way...which can be a little comforting and definitely theraputic.

 

[Blenheim]

(((Amber)))
TTC''s hard - the waiting, the living life in two week increments, the feeling like you have to DTD when you may not want to or you could jeopardize your chances. I actually started a blog to vent at the end of last cycle, because I felt like it was unfair to put all of that on hubby and I wasn''t comfortable opening up to anyone else.

I have no idea why things happen the way that they do. From what I can tell, you''d be a great mama. Better than a ton out there. The universe just doesn''t make sense sometimes.

And don''t beat yourself up over missing a day. We missed the day that Ovusoft put me as Oing this cycle because I had a little too much drinky drinky, while my perfectly timed cycles were busts. Again, makes no sense.

I''m really rooting for you.

 

[qtiekiki]

Amber - I share the same sentiments as all the ladies. TTC can be very frustrating, and sometimes you just can't help but think what the heck is wrong with me. I know it's hard to do when you want something so badly, but try to take it easy and relax. Maybe it's best for you to just take your mind off TTC just for a little while; for you and your DH to just enjoy yourself.

FWIW, DH and I were stressing out because we were TTCing for almost a year and nothing. We were both thinking in the back of our minds that something is wrong with us. Then one day we just said forget it, we'll just enjoy ourselves and not think about TTC. Just let nature takes it course kind of thing. After a couple of months (almost exactly a year since we started TTCing), we found out I was PG when we weren't even expecting it.

You have a wonderful, supportive group of ladies here who understands what you are going through. Your time will come, and it'll be more special than you can imagine.

 

[akw94]

Hi Amber,
I''m not on PS much lately and haven''t been to this thread in quite awhile. This evening, I popped in and read your post and just felt so sad for you. I''m sorry you''re feeling so upset. When you compare it to the LIW days, I can relate to your feelings. The only advice I can offer (and I''m not great at taking my own advice) is to try and enjoy each day and just stay balanced. When things were difficult in my life some months back, I turned to a therapist. She helped me realize that it''s actually ok to feel all the different emotions one might feel at any given moment, it''s learning how to not let the negative ones overpower. It''s trying to stay in the moment that you''re in and not letting the past or the future take over. Of course, you''ll still think about those times and that''s normal but you can''t let them consume you or take away from your today. Sure, I didn''t quite have that down during my LIW days but it has truly helped me manage since then. I hope it helps you, at least a little.
I read your post and just wish I could give you a hug. I hope you''re feeling a little better.

 

[E B]

Amber, love, I'm sorry you're feeling blue. I sort of know how you feel, just on a different side. The 'staying pregnant' side.

I don't know if you're a "VIP" member of Fertility Friend, but it's so worth it. Pricescope seems to represent a population outside of the 'norm,' in regards to both diamonds and fertility- it just isn't that common to get pregnant on the first try like so many people here have, myself included (just as it isn't really 'the norm' to have a 2+ ct diamond). I find that Fertility Friend is a bit more representative of real life, be it the larger population size or the fact that many of the women over there have joined after a few months of trying.

If you ever want to talk, you know how to get a hold of me. I'll provide a shoulder, because I know how it feels. I'm not around here as much as I used to because I get wrapped up in the fear of, as you said, being "the cheese," and it makes me crazy. I can't do it. I find I cope much more easily with my situation when I'm focused on things not 100 percent baby related. No offense to anyone here- you're all fabulous.

Anyway. Big hugs to you. I'm here if you need me.

 

[TravelingGal]

Amber, I don''t know/understand much about what goes on in this thread, but I can certainly feel the emotion that this takes on all you ladies. You all are a wonderful group and having a baby is a wonderful thing. I am (and will continue) wishing this with all my heart for all of you.

 

[AmberWaves]

Hello Ladies,

Thanks again to all the very very kind words. I think I''m just going through a rough patch, and when you have no one to vent to other than you poor ladies (Sorry!), it all just gets bottled up until I just break. So far no tears tonight, I''m just so tired of being frustrated. Hm. Is that an oxymoron, irony.... Blah.

I had a great dinner with my dad, bought some flea meds and kibble for the pup, and now I''m watching Bridezillas. Nothing can make you feel better than watching a bunch of suckers (aka fiances) get beat on by bat-sh!t crazy women. Makes you wonder what these guys are thinking marrying these women. Also makes me realize what a catch I am.

So we''re getting new vitamins (DH and I), and hopefully that''ll turn my ''tude around, and pep me up a bit.

 

[jas]

Amber -- I usually lurk on this thread, but I do want to say if you do end up coming to Chicago, you can come hang out with me...we''ll go on a spree on Michigan Avenue (even if it''s window shopping)....maybe we can organize an entire GTG with this crowd!

Hi to everyone here!

 

[sbde]

hi amber.

i''m really sorry that you are feeling as down as you are.

just wanted to say that i was right there with you when we were TTC''ing. while i don''t know too many details of your personal TTC story, here are a few things that helped us conceive (at least i *think* they did). sorry if it''s all TMI or stuff that you are already doing...

- vitamins
- going to the loo BEFORE DTD so that i could stay in bed afterwards
- i heard that BD earlier in the day was better than doing so at night (in terms of spern motility), so we did that
- during key ovulation days, i''d lie in bed with my legs raised against the wall for at least 1/2 hr after BD
- we used preseed - not the actual preseed stuff with a syringe but the small sachets called Pre'' just to help out
- did NOT let anything else take precedence when the key ovulations days were around. no dinners or nights out that we knew would tire us out. think about it, we know roughly when those crucial dates are going to be, so it''s easy enough to plan around them.

i think that last point is really key...there''s such a small window of opportunity each month, take advantage of it! good luck and *hugs*

 

[AmberWaves]

Jas and SBDE (hope I got the initials in the right order!):

Thanks for the tips SBDE, I''m definitely changing our habits- including eating, vitamins, exercise and planning nights out- I totally agree with you. We have the preseed, and that syringe is disgusting- nothing sexier than sticking a bulb full of goo into your hoo-town, right?

I much like the idea of "pre" sachets, though!

Jas: Totally would love to have a PS GTG while I''m in Chicago. The idea is almost a definite, I just need to find out exactly when I''m expected- it''s for a surprise baby shower.