The Official TTC for 6 Months or More Thread

[monkeyprincess]

Wow Bright, I didn't see your earlier post, so this is news to me! I definitely see a faint line on at least a few of those tests. A little hard to see, but there is something there. How annoying you haven't heard back from the doctor! Anyway, I am sending you loads of dust and prayers that you have a sticky bean in there! And I know I've mentioned this before many times, but I couldn't get a line on the wondfos until 14dpiui when I was pregnant.

 

[amc80]

12P definitely has a line. It looks like it has color as well. Man, I can't wait to hear your beta results.

 

[royalasscherlover]

Bright, I am keeping my fingers crossed for you! I honestly can't tell in the picture because of the shadows, but I am bad at Wondfo picture reading in general.

LV, I hope you are doing ok with the disappointment.

Thanks for all the support ladies, it does help. This is all very unfair - I just want good things to happen for all of us.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

Bright-I see a line on 11P and 12P...hope that the betas bring good news!!!! I am thinking of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[BrightSpot]

MP, thanks for the reassurance. I've definitely been thinking of you & your maddening early tests results with Ev between the doctors lab & the lazy wondfos.

Jgator, thanks for the luck! And I wish we were friends IRL (or rather, in a non virtual environment) too.

LV, yeah, I hope it's just a late implantation, though I do worry that with such ambiguous results that it might not be viable even if I am pregnant.

I hope you really like acupuncture! At least with the community route you can try it out without too much expense.

Thanks, amc. You've got an eagle eye!

SB, thanks to you too. I hope you start feeling better soon. This process is really not fair. Big hugs. Do you have a plan for the next cycle?

Bella, thanks, lady. Me too, but I wouldn't know yet because.....

The doctors office still hasn't called me! It's 8pm here & I'm starting to lose hope that I'll hear anything tonight. I emailed the doc & cc'd the nurses but no news yet. I'm beyond frustrated.

 

[Loves Vintage]

Bright - Soooo soooo hopeful for you! lt is so early that l don't think you can really read into the darkness levels yet. The NP kept telling me last month that you really can't rely on the tests getting darker at this stage. There is just too much variability sample to sample. l know women talk about lines getting darker all the time, but l do believe the NP is right, especially when it comes to same day testing! Hoping your office calls tonight or if not, that you get positive news in the am.

What a time for PS to be down, right? l kept checking my computer at work!!

SB - l hope you are holding up ok with the disappointment too. On to the next cycle!

 

[S&I]

Bright, I see lines on 11p and 12p, from my phone! Fingers crossed for you!

 

[BrightSpot]

S&I, thanks so much!

LV, you're so sweet. PS being down just added to my general feeling of insanity today. And I think the obsessive testing was just making it worse. Thanks for sharing what your NP said. I think that's a good point, especially regarding multiple tests in a day.

The doc never called. I wound up testing again (with a pretty diluted sample) -- I got a negative EPT & a crazy faint line (that didn't show up for a while) on the wondfo. I need to step away from the pee sticks.

Thanks for all of your support, ladies!

 

[JGator]

Bright, I see a line too! I'm crossing everything for you that you get good news from the doc tomorrow AM!

 

[tammy77]

Bright!!! I definitely see the lines too. I hope you get fantastic news tomorrow morning! Back to stalk mode.

 

[BrightSpot]

Thanks, Jgator & Tammy.

Just got this from my doc:

Your first bhcg was low positive at 11. We need to see how the trend progresses to get more of an idea whats to be.

This really concerns me as the number is super low & even lower than both of my 12dpo betas for my blighted ovum pregnancies (which were 29 & 36, I think.) This might be worse news than a bfn.

Please send prayers, dust, etc that this turns out to be a viable pregnancy.

 

[royalasscherlover]

Oh Bright, what a tough spot to be in. Big, big hugs and I'm sending you a truckload of sticky dust.

 

[Loves Vintage]

Sending prayers, Bright. I continue to hope that this was a late implantation and that your betas will double appropriately. When will you have another beta?

 

[monkeyprincess]

Oh Bright, that is so frustrating. Have you taken any more HPTs? Just know you can definitely count on my prayers. Grow baby grow!

 

[JGator]

Bright, so sorry about the low beta. I desperately hope it doubles for you. Please keep us posted. Hugs to you.

 

[Bella_mezzo]

(((((((((((((Bright))))))))))))) I hope that you get better news later this week

 

[NewEnglandLady]

Bright, you are in the worst kind of limbo right now and I'm keeping everything crossed for you!

 

[tammy77]

Bright, love and prayers sent up for you. So hoping that your beta goes up nicely this week!! ((Hugs))

 

[lliang_chi]

Bright thinking of you and hoping for the best

 

[BrightSpot]

Tammy, mp, jgator, LC, LV, NEL, bella & SB, thanks so much for your support & prayers & hope. It means so much to me.

I've run the gamut of emotions lately from hope, fear, anger & I guess I've settled on resigned.
With such a low number, I really can't imagine this being a viable pregnancy. I've been testing morning & night & the lines are getting a bit darker, but I started spotting this morning. In a way that makes me sad, but in a way also relieved at the idea of not having to see another empty sac on an u/s or have another d&c.
Still, this is all so very sad. The idea that there will never exist a little kid with my eyes & DH's smile breaks my heart.

 

[Loves Vintage]

Bright - I'm so very sorry. We are all here for you. Sending you strength and a kind hug.

 

[tammy77]

Bright, I'm so sorry. I'm crying over here for your losses, it just isn't fair and I feel terrible for you and your DH. It doesn't make sense at all. Big hugs, I wish I could do something to ease your pain.

 

[Laila619]

Still, this is all so very sad. The idea that there will never exist a little kid with my eyes & DH's smile breaks my heart.

Awww. It is so very sad.

Don't give up, Bright. I still think it will happen one day. You will have that beautiful child with your eyes and DH's smile.

 

[lizzyann]

Bright, don't give up hope yet. I've been in this limbo many a many times, and well it frankly is the worst. You can't be happy that you got a positive like most women because of your history and you don't want to discount it because this could be the sticky bean for you. Waiting on betas became such a big part of my life so I totally understand your mental state at the moment. I am still holding out hope for you lady. HCG sticks getting darker is a good sign. Do you still have frozen embryos Bright? Reason I ask is because in my case, I could get pregnant but not stay pregnant and my fertility doctor really felt that doing IVF and going through that embryo selection and implanting the best is what made my pregnancy happen. Big hugs to you. Prayers going out your way....

 

[BrightSpot]

LV, thanks, lady.

Tammy, thanks so much for your sweet post. It really does help ease the pain. And yeah, it's not fair. I thought I'd come to terms with this (mostly) but I've been grieving a lot this week.

Laila, thanks. I'd intended for this to be my last cycle because TTC has taken a large toll on my health (lots of pcos symptoms I can't treat while ttc). I'd thought that if the doc had found something definitive that could be fixed I'd be willing to try another cycle but it seems like it's all just a crapshoot so I'm not sure how much more I can put myself through.

Lizzy, sweet lady, I remember how much you went through to get your little angel. When we did our IVF we only had 2 embryos that made it to blastocyst stage (of 7 retrieved & 5 fertilized). One was transferred during the fresh cycle (bfn) & the other was frozen. We transferred the frozen embryo this cycle, which was a combo Gonal F IUI & FET. We don't have any left now.

So I've been continuing to test & the lines started getting lighter yesterday. And what started out as spotting became regular period bleeding (red & heavier) yesterday. So I'm pretty sure this was a chemical pregnancy. I had a second beta drawn yesterday & should get the results today but I'd be beyond shocked if things looked good. I'm just waiting for the go ahead to stop the meds. Continuing with 3 suppositories a day with this level of bleeding is beyond icky & is making me quite grouchy.

I asked my doc what's causing this & he said poor egg quality. I asked him if there was anything that could be done to improve it & he said it's usually genetic & there's not much that can be done except living a healthy lifestyle (I do) & taking some vitamins (do I ever!)

I don't know if adding lupron or dexamethasone (steroid) could help with egg quality or not. I'm also not sure how many more medications (especially high side effect ones like these) I want to subject myself to.

 

[monkeyprincess]

Thinking of you Bright. I can't even imagine the pain. However you decide to proceed, you have my thoughts and prayer. I'm so very sorry

 

[JGator]

Bright, I am heart broken for you. I support whatever you decide to do going forward. I know you will be a Mommy one day like I have said before. Don't you just wish you knew now how and when that would happen so you could be at peace? Hugs and love to you my dear.

 

[BrightSpot]

MP, thank you, dear. I really appreciate your support and kindness, as always.

You too, Jgator. The uncertainty of this whole process surely does make it more difficult. Not only not knowing if you'll succeed or not, but not knowing it that "one more cycle" will finally be the one vs when to cut your losses, exit the emotional roller coaster & move on.
Thank you for your compassion.

Afm, I'm so frustrated right now. I totally have my period (heavy, red flow). My
beta hasn't doubled in the time it's supposed to (yesterday's reading was 26.75, up from 11.6 from Thursday), but because it hasn't gone down, the doc won't let me stop the meds. I've been taking crinone twice a day & estrogen once a day, so 3 suppositories, which is getting really disgusting given my current circumstances. I asked if this was really necessary & they offered to switch me to either PIO injections (no thanks, got nerve damage last time) or prometrium to be taken orally. So I guess I'm going to try the prometrium, though I really think this is unnecessary & a mistake. I don't want to prolong this process & worry the drugs might stop the bleeding & maybe necessitate some other way of resolving this later.
They want me to come back for another beta on Wednesday.

ETA: can anyone who has used prometrium let me know what I might expect as far as side effects are concerned? I'll be taking it orally.
Thanks!

 

[Loves Vintage]

What a tough situation to be in, Bright. I wonder if they need to see two betas that haven't doubled before they are willing to stop the meds? To answer your question re: prometrium, I have not had any side effects while taking it.

I'm not sure what your PCOS symptoms are and how you might be treating them in the future, but I wonder if treating those symptoms might affect your cycle as well. I think you mentioned once that you don't ovulate on your own. Would any of the other meds you might take help with this?

 

[dcgator]

Hi ladies,

I am very sorry for not being around much, as I was solo with the baby and it also happened to be ridiculously busy at work. All that being said, it has calmed down a bit now and the hubby is back, so I finally have some time to catch up.

Bright - I am so very sorry sweetheart. My heart just aches for you. I know it is beyond disappointing to get the line and then see it fade. That is also really awful that you have to continue the meds, but rest assured that even on the meds, you can still get your period if its coming, as I have gotten mine on pregesterone too. As for the oral pregesterone, it made me a bit dizzy at first, but no other side effects on my end. Again, I am so sorry about everything, and please let us know how it goes over the next few days. HUGE HUG!

LV - I am so sorry it didn't work out for you either sweetie, I was really hoping you would be there with me through this one like last time... But, I know it will happen for you hun and in the meantime, you have your beautiful S to keep you smiling. Are you going to meet with your doc and come up with a new protocal, or are you going to try IUI again? Did you make any decisions about accupuncture. I haven't tried it, but I know people sing its praises for fertility and otherwise.

Shortblonde - I'm sorry it didn't work for you either. I know this process sucks and the emotions of it all are awful, but when you do eventually get there, it will all be worth it. Big hug my dear.

MP - How you holding up? I take it you are squarely in the 2WW now? Fingers crossed that you get a pleasant surprise this month, without having to go the IUI route.

Tbaus - I imagine you are crazy busy with all the moving right now. I hope everything went well and you are enjoying your new place. How did the doc go this morning, were they happy with your levels? Fingers crossed for you lady.

Bella and LC - Thanks for popping in. Glad to see everything is going well with you ladies too.

AFM - Well, I did betas on Friday the 11th, Monday the 14th and Friday the 18th. My first was only 12, the second was 39 and the third was 392. The doctor seemed happy with the progression, though I am a little bit less excited, as my levels with my daughter were over 700 after a week. Either way, for now, DH and I are excited about my being pregnant, and are eagerly awaiting the sonogram on November 7th. I am praying all goes well until then, and still taking random tests to ease my worries. I will not be updating my stuff anymore on here, but I will definitely keep wathching you all here and giving support to all you lovely ladies. Till then, take care of all of you, and fingers crossed for those in the 2WW.