second thoughts!?? I NEED REASSURANCE!!!

[essaince]

SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!!!

Originally i wanted something simple...(i had another post on here, but no one responded...) probably because there wasn't anything really to comment on... but anyway, long story short, i had wanted to get this band for my ering... i consulted a few friends who liked the simplicity of this ring, but thought i should request to have it made into a six prong ring... which i did ask the jeweler if it was possible, and that it was. this happened on...FRIDAY. (2days ago today). by the way, my fiance had not seen this band...only the picture of it (which is posted here). Very important: his reaction was, "oh...(very uninterested) order it if you like that one." (The jeweler told me that to order the ring in my size would take 4-6 weeks). The funny thing is that i'm getting married in july...

anyway (sorry this is getting lengthy...) on SATURDAY... my fiance and i went to go pick up our diamond (even though we hadn't finalized a setting yet) on our way from the parking lot to the store we bought our diamonds from, we decided we would look around for settings (we were in the los angeles jewelry district) by sheer fate, there was some guy setting up shop in the window display, and i saw through the swinging double glass doors that he had a whole shelf of stuff that was all silver-colored and i kept walking even though i was looking at the display...my fiance saw me staring into the window/glass door and asked if i wanted to go in, at first i said no, (because i had that first setting in mind already) but then two steps pass the store i said, what the heck, "lets go look," so...we went in and the guy was uuuber nice, and not demanding nor hissy (because i was VERY confused and asked to see EVERYTHING that sparkled). NOTE* we had already bought my wedding band, so i didn't want to look at sets...* i showed him the picture of the ring i had in mind (ring #1) and he took out this cute setting which looked like it from the top view, but it had two side diamonds that were larger than the rest on the band, which made it look like a three stone ring...(not actually, but you get the point). But because the diamond we had chosen is quite small (0.5) the side diamonds would've dwarfed the center stone, so i regrettablely had to turn down that setting..

THEN i saw the sets...and oh my gosh they were precious!!! total i believe there were 24 of them... some of them i eliminated because they were too tall or too bulky for my little rock... so we narrowed the search to three of them... all very very beautiful 2 of them had a little split in the band, so it looked like two bands holding the main stone, and it had a detail bridging the gap at the right and left of the center stone...very pretty, but i didn't like the split, so i finally chose the one that didn't have it. (throughout this search at this one place, my fiance was VERY interested in the sets, and even started asking questions about them and asking how much they were- we were on a pretty tight budget) so we ended up purchasing the set...major impulse buying (we took about 1hr to decide on this one, but i had been pondering about ring #1 for MONTHS!!!)

Here's the delimma...i love this ring we bought, but arguably, it was the most expensive setting we looked at and we even overshot our budget by a few hundred dollars...i had been reading posts on ps to get myself informed, but i can't say that i'm totally convinced i made the right choice...

SO, should i have stuck with the plainer, simplier band (which i think is very elegant and will never be out of style)? or did i make the right choice to buy a more "antique" looking band, which can be interpreted as unique, but may go out of style?

SORRY for those of you reading this post!!!
************PICTURE OF RING#1

 

[essaince]

the one i bought (RING#2)

 

[essaince]

side view of the one i bought (RING #2)

 

[february2003bride]

Oh wow. Well, I really love the first photo. Is that your first e-ring setting? The 3 rign set, while nice, I think might over power your half carat stone. Maybe just the e-ring and one wedding band? Either way, that''s a whole lotta bling on that new set

 

[perry]

Just to clarify: Your S.O. helped pick out the one you just bought and is happy with it - and you are questioning if that was worth overshooting your budget a couple of hundred.

Did I get it right...

Might I suggest that those extra several hundred dollars may be one of the best investments of your life. Do you really want to go into marriage and your future ahead by giving her a ring that was - at best - her second choice - and more likely one that she is not that interested in giving her comment? Especially after she helped pick out the one that she wanted...

If I understand the story right - I would not waste a minute before cancling that other order (that has not been made yet).

There are times in your relationship where you have to learn to budget and stick to it. I suggest you always consider setting asside a little extra to give her a item every now and then... It will make your life go much easier.

As far as the "existing" weding band. Either sell it or donate it to charity (someone poor who''s getting married would love it - I am sure). You might even ask your S.O. for her advice on how to dispose of it in a way that has meaning to her (if she dosn''t feel the need to sell it - ask her about donating it to charity - and what her favorite charity is...).

Perry

 

[moon river]

I love the set. Antique style jewelry never really goes out of ''style''. As long as your happy with it, that is what counts. If, down the road you change you mind or sense of style you can always reset.

 

[moon river]

I''m taking it as essaince is a female. And the set looks like a two piece set instead of 3 piece. Am I wrong??

 

[Dee*Jay]

Personally I think the second set posted has more "character." The first ring is nice too, but I just like the second one better, and no, I don''t think it will go out of style.

By the way, is it two rings or three? I looks like it''s one e-ring and two flanking bands, but I''m not entirely sure from the photos.

 

[essaince]

Date: 4/16/2006 6:50:22 PM
Author: february2003bride
Oh wow. Well, I really love the first photo. Is that your first e-ring setting? The 3 rign set, while nice, I think might over power your half carat stone. Maybe just the e-ring and one wedding band? Either way, that''s a whole lotta bling on that new set

the first photo is what i''ve named as (RING#1) and it''s just the ering (the band is just a plain 3mm band) so the ering will have the thinner band with diamonds and milgrain and the wedding ring will have the thicker band but no diamonds

the second and third photo is the ring we ended up getting (by the way Perry, i am female, thanks moon river)

so (RING#2) is the ering, which has baguette sides and little round brilliants on top and bottom of the baguettes. and then it has that matching band that looks like a little bow. it''s not actually a three ring set (just to clarify)

 

[essaince]

Date: 4/16/2006 7:27:06 PM
Author: Dee*Jay
Personally I think the second set posted has more ''character.'' The first ring is nice too, but I just like the second one better, and no, I don''t think it will go out of style.

By the way, is it two rings or three? I looks like it''s one e-ring and two flanking bands, but I''m not entirely sure from the photos.

i''m going to take pictures of it separately so you guys can see the rings separately, they are sooo pretty...(there''s only two rings) but there''s just the little nagging voice that saids i should''ve gotten the first ring coz i had been looking at it and contemplating it for such a long time....

 

[essaince]

this is the side view of RING#1

 

[moon river]

Do you have a closeup of the bow on the ring? I think that''s so unusual. I think you made the right choice. This is something you''re both happy with. He didn''t give the half hearted approval to this one. I hope ya''ll are happy with your purchase.

 

[essaince]

moonriver: he didn''t give his half hearted approval but he was talking about the $$ for a while (well a few hours) HAHAHAHA it was funny though because he was like, "u like this one? yes?" (talks to the jeweler) then looks back at me "you''re sure?" then asks for the price and looks at me, (and he looks shocked but he shrugs it off) and we get it... looking back at the whole ordeal, BEFORE he got me involved in picking my OWN ring, he was going to get a plain and simple six prong tiffany setting in white gold, ($50 at the jeweler where we bought our diamond) so that''s why we bought the plain white band for my wedding band.

THEN he asked for my opinion on the plain 6 prong band and i was like "hmmm" and then he said "okay, you pick" and i picked out what i posted as RING#1, but he was like..."well...it just looks like the tiffany setting with diamonds" except it was a cathedral setting. (i didn''t want it just to have the prongs sticking up)...OoOo which reminds me to add that the other two matching sets that were close contenders (but had the split in the band) had prongs that were sticking up, so that was another reason i didn''t want those.

So then when we went TOGETHER and saw those sets we picked one of the ones we saw together...by the way i''m trying to get pictures of the wedding band with the bow, by itself, it''s kind of hard!! i''ll post it soon...

thanks for all the nice comments!!! keep them coming

 

[ilovesparkles]

I am going to ignore what the rings look like and comment on the feeling I get from reading your post. It sounds like when you found these other rings picking up your diamond, you had the aha moment of finding your ring. Even though you hemmed and hawed over ring#1 it just wasn''t right for you and when you picked #2 it was so easy and quick because it was the right choice. I wouldn''t worry about what style comes in or goes out, it will always be your set. But that is just my opinion. Also I''d be very interested in seeing a profile of the ering and the band seperately! They are gorgeous!

 

[moon river]

I think the fact that you both chose it together makes it more special. I agree with Ilovesparkles. Spending so much time deciding on #1 doesn''t make it the right choice. Like Oprah says, those ''AHA'' moments are what life is all about.

 

[essaince]

awwww ilovesparkles, and moon river thanks!! i think a big part of my uncertainty was due to the fact that i DID spend alot of time contemplating to buy the first one, and then just changing that in a heart beat! (well a one hour long heart beat!!) here''s some pics that you guys wanted to see...

here''s the wedding band from the set: (doesn''t it look like a bow tie??) incase you were curious as to why it looks like that, it''s because on the ering, the four prongs were originally square pieces of metal and they were supposed to make like four perfectly squared prongs on the corners of the diamond, but i thought this was too rigid and structured (i''ll try to find a pic of what i mean), SO, i asked them to cut the prongs down the middle, and it became a split prong which look like the little feet on the porcelian (spelling error) bath tubs from the 1900''s...

 

[essaince]

another look at the bowtie wedding band from the set... *IDEAS* please, the little diamonds (what''s this setting called? bead or melee?)should i go back and have them put the little diamonds all the way around (like eternity style?) right now it''s only half way...

 

[essaince]

hmm, i can''t attach more than one pic to each post...weird...(sorry, still new to this thing) here''s a picture of JUST the ering... i know that it can be mistaken for a stacked ring, but it''s not!! really!! lol enjoy!! i really hope you guys don''t mind my erratic posting...as you can see i''m a little obsessed!!!

 

[essaince]

this post came up twice...so i edited this one... how do i delete this oopsie post?

 

[essaince]

OK! done! here''s the profile view of my "beloved"... i didn''t get profile pics on the wedding band, b/c the detail is just at the top, and the sides are fairly uneventful...b/c it''s just inlaid with little little little diamonds (TINY TINY things) and they just ring half way down...

I really thank all of you guys that have commented, you''ve really helped me calm my inner demons

HAHAHA... i was going crazy!! (i had only gotten the ring LESS than 24 hours ago, and i was already thinking i made the wrong choice by being impulsive and not sticking to my original ring!!)

I guess there is a point, if i contemplated that long, i was probably looking for something that clearly wasn''t there... gosh* this site is truely theraputic!! thanks again!!

Hmm...i guess my next topic/question would be if we chose the right diamond! lol, i''ll find the link to the other topic....

by the way, any ideas on whether i should get this ring appraised? i mean, it wasn''t "cheap" it was a huge investment to my fiance and I but it is nothing compared to some of the incredible pieces i''ve seen on ps... is appraisal really necessary? my diamond is only a .51 (and i don''t think it was a great great rock to begin with...SI1 clarity...) ideas?

 

[msdarlinjoy]

Hi & welcome to PS!

I say if you like the second ring

, and your FI likes the second ring

... keep it. They are both very nice!

Sell the other or keep it and put a gemstone in it.

I am just curious though ... the picture in your advatar ... is it one of your rings? It is very pretty too. Can you tell me where you found it?

Thanks and have a wonderful day!

 

[ilovesparkles]

OOOOOOOOOO it is sooooooooo beautiful

It is funny though how people interpret things. I was imagining the other profile. the profile where you see the head setting of the diamond hehehe. Never thought of profile as the view put up. I''m glad to hear you are feeling a bit better about the purchase. From what I can see (and I am NO expert) it looks like there is pave diamonds on the band and some channel set diamonds on the ering but it is hard to tell. Also you asked about putting diamonds all the way around the band. In my opinion it is partially a waste of money because it really won''t be seen while you are wearing it. Also for some people it can be uncomfortable, but most importantly if you put them ALL the way around you can''t have the ring sized in the future. And believe me finger size changes as we age. Some people do it like 3/4 or 4/5 of the way around so there is still a space left on the under side for sizing room.

 

[moon river]

OOOOHHHH I didn''t see the baguettes til now!!!

I love it even more. I adore the bowtie wedding ring. I agree with not making a full eternity band. I think it''s perfection already.

 

[moon river]

BTW Love the split prongs!!!!!

 

[mrssalvo]

choose the ring you love now. i wouldn''t worry about what is "in" down the road. sounds like your FI wants you to be happy and didn''t mind spending a bit more for something you''re going to wear for a long time.

 

[essaince]

Date: 4/16/2006 9:37:54 PM
Author: Mrs Darlin Joy
Hi & welcome to PS!

I say if you like the second ring

, and your FI likes the second ring

... keep it. They are both very nice!

Sell the other or keep it and put a gemstone in it.

I am just curious though ... the picture in your advatar ... is it one of your rings? It is very pretty too. Can you tell me where you found it?

Thanks and have a wonderful day!

Hi! For the months that i''ve been on snooping around, i''ve seen a bunch of your posts nice to meet you! just to set things straight, ALL the pics are for only two rings...which i''ve conviently named RING#1 and RING#2... and we bought RING#2... but RING#1 was the one that i was looking at for a long time (and had wanted)...so to reiterate the story: i saw ring#1 MONTHS ago, and wanted to order it, but the jeweler said for me to wait until i had picked a center stone, so they could have it made according to the specs of the stone...HOWEVER, my fiance and i went to go pick up our center stone (from a different jeweler) and we saw a shop with a lot of sparklies, and after an hour of looking, i "impulsively" bought one (RING#2) and had second doubts, cuz i was thinking maybe i should have thought it over, but now that i have it in my possession and have been staring at it for 24 hours i think it''s quite unique

and forgive my ignorance but what is a advatar?? and there are only two rings shown the RING#1 (the cathedral) with the bead set diamonds with milgrain edges approx 2.5mm ,is from my immediate area and RING#2 which is part of the set with the bowtie wedding band, is further away (actually IN los angeles)... would you like the numbers? or addresses?

 

[essaince]

ilovesparkles and moon river: i understand the logic of the eternity band now and will refrain from it...THANK YOU!!! and to tell you the truth, since the rings (ering and wedding) had to be sized down for me (from a 5.75?? to a 4.0), the pave diamonds on the sides of both rings run more than half way down, and i understand (NOW) that it would be silly to spend the extra money to alter a ring especially since 1) no one will see that side of it 2) it may get ruined (i''ve been reading MAJOR horror stories on ps) and 3) i like them the way they are... i guess the old saying stays... don''t fix what''s not broke...(okay, so i modified it) HAHAHA

some specs incase anyone is interested: the center is a 0.51 D SI... the engagement band has channel set baguettes (0.50carats) and pave??set diamonds along the top and bottom edge... the profile is...well, a profile... i''ll take pictures of the "normal way" for ilovesparkles...

i didn''t before b/c it''s not really oooph...

hmm, as i was typing this i found yet another justification of why i should be happy with my choice (well, as far as comparing with the other rings i saw WITH ring#2...) b/c the diamond is set very low...i''m VERY VERY VERY clumsy (just yesterday i went bowling and smacked myself on the side of the knee with my bowling ball) so a high basket setting would have been a disaster waiting to happen... so now i realize, i absolutely cannot torture myself about deciding on this ring coz each of the other sets had some characteristic i couldn''t deal with... (now i sound like a manic talking to myself...hmm)

i wonder, can anyone find a picture of what i''m describing? that the ring i chose originally didn''t have the double prongs, but instead had 4 square pieces of metal to hold the diamond and was very stylized?? i''m trying to show my maid of honor what i mean (she was not with me that day) and i can''t explain it to her well enough... and also in my first post, i mentioned rings that had a split in the middle (so if you were wearing the ring, there would be a horizontal gap on the left and right of the center diamond, so it looked like you were wearing two bands, but it was connected on the bottom side)... thanks ahead if anyone can supply pictures!! good night EVERYONE!!!

 

[ilovesparkles]

Hehe your avatar is the pick off to the left side. My avatar is a blonde blue-eyed girl with a flower in her hair. Yours is of a ring with some filigree. Mrs. Darlin Joy was asking where that ring in your picture is from I think. Good night indeed! I am up on PS way too late as always, but I always have to check one last time!

 

[ilovesparkles]

Is this like the split shank you wanted a picture of? Ok now seriously I am going to bed! Right after I finish down the list on page one of Rocky Talky.....

 

[essaince]

yes that is the split shank THANKS!!! OHHH mrsdarlingjoy: the ring on the left is what i had originally wanted for my engagement ring, but you see the crazy stuff around the (crown?) where the prongs hold the diamond? it''s not practical for everyday wear, but it''s a real stunner!! the website is www.pinkbox.com.hk click on "english" then (scroll over the little boxes) click "products" and scroll over some more boxes and click "solitaire diamond" then scroll boxes and click "one love collection" the ring is the top row- 6th over from left... its the one with the heart on the profile pic