Penny for your thoughts

[kenny]

Ten days ago a very close friend told me on the phone that he owed me about a thousand dollars for a project we are doing, and he'd get a check in the mail the next day.
No problem, I said.
He's always been very prompt with payments.

He also told me that a couple days back he tested positive for COVID.
I told him I wish I could cure your COVID, but let me know if there is anything I could do for you. Anything.
Like me he's older with significant medical conditions increasing his risk for serious COVID reactions, or worse.

It's now nearly 2 weeks after testing positive and I've gotten no text, voice mail, or email.
Even more concerning, no check, which is really out of character for him.

I don't have his husband's phone number or email, but they live nearby.

Here's my question.
Atheist here, but it's against my religion to just knock on anyone's door without calling first.
In this case should I just do that anyway.
Or maybe I should just leave them in the peace, which they might prefer during what is possibly a traumatic time?

I left a voice msg on his phone earlier.
Maybe I'll wait a day or two before knocking on their door.

Your thoughts?

 

[MamaBee]

@kenny You can ask the police for a welfare check. Explain that he had Covid two weeks ago so they have PPE available. Tell them you’re a close friend and very worried because you usually hear from him..that it’s out of character. I hope he’s okay.

 

[kenny]

Thanks, but wouldn't a police visit be more traumatic for them than a possibly-rude and unwelcome surprise visit from me?
Plus the neighbors start whispering and gossiping when they see police at someone's house.

Is there any way police have access to the hubby's phone number to convey a brief message from me?

 

[MamaBee]

Thanks, but wouldn't a police visit be more traumatic for them than a possibly-rude surprise visit from me?

What happens if they’re really sick from Covid and need help?
If you go over there Kenny..wear a mask. Your friend could have passed it on to his husband who could be contagious now.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Thanks, but wouldn't a police visit be more traumatic for them than a possibly-rude and unwelcome surprise visit from me?
Plus the neighbors start whispering and gossiping when they see police at someone's house.

Is there any way police have access to the hubby's phone number to convey a brief message from me?

You must live in a nicer neighbourhood than me

I hope your friend is ok
my workmate is recovering from it
she has now tested negative but she has poor immunity and is so tired and now off work with a bad cold
your friend is older
I'd be worried about then
That's the police's job

Im not sure if I'd want to knock on their door just because of the covid risk
but someone should

i hope they are both ok

 

[marymm]

Maybe text him? "hey, just checking in with you to see how you are doing, please let me know if I can bring by any groceries or be of any help to you"

 

[Lookinagain]

can you leave a note on the door in case one of them is going out to get things to take care of the other? for instance, say " if you guys need anything let me know, happy to help? if you think they are both seriously ill, then yes, a wellness check. Are you sure they are both in the house?

 

[kenny]

Thanks all.
I called the police non-emergency number.
They checked and said there have been no calls to police or fire from that address.
I told them please do not do a "wellness check".
Not yet.

I just texted my friend to say I'm dropping by soon to check on you two and see if you want things like food delivery, etc.

If nobody's home I'll leave a note requesting hubby's phone number and leave mine in case hubby's home but my friend is in the hospital.

Of course I'll wear a new N95, gloves, and not enter their home or touch anything.

 

[MamaBee]

Thanks all.
I called the police non-emergency number.
They checked and said there have been no calls to police or fire from that address.
I told them please do not do a "wellness check".
Not yet.

I just texted my friend to say I'm dropping by soon to check on you two and see if you want things like food delivery, etc.

If nobody's home I'll leave a note requesting hubby's phone number and leaving mine in case hubby's home but my friend is in the hospital.

Of course I'll wear a new N95 and not enter their home or touch anything.

I hope they’re okay Kenny. Let us know..

 

[TooPatient]

Thanks all.
I called the police non-emergency number.
They checked and said there have been no calls to police or fire from that address.
I told them please do not do a "wellness check".
Not yet.

I just texted my friend to say I'm dropping by soon to check on you two and see if you want things like food delivery, etc.

If nobody's home I'll leave a note requesting hubby's phone number and leaving mine in case hubby's home but my friend is in the hospital.

Of course I'll wear a new N95 and not enter their home or touch anything.

I think you are handling things very well! If they have a mail slot in the door or something, you might drop a card in so they notice it if they are inside sick and just not able to make it to the door when you knock.

 

[kenny]

Whew!
Just got a return text.
He's okay but has been sleeping a lot and recovering well.

Thanks all.
That was kind of scary.

 

[kenny]

You must live in a nicer neighbourhood than me

We just never get caught by police.

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

Whew!
Just got a return text.
He's okay but has been sleeping a lot and recovering well.

Thanks all.
That was kind of scary.

Oh Kenny im so pleased for all concerned
The internet is a funny old thing (in a good way) that we can suddenly care for people we don't even know

im glad your friend is recovering

 

[Daisys and Diamonds]

I read durring the Spanish flu epidemic (before regular people had telephones here) people hung a white tea towel out of a window if they needed help

 

[CMN]

Dear Kenny, great that your friend and his husband are doing okay. I was going to suggest sending a text escalating your concern for his/their welfare as it might be more likely to elicit a response. I know when I had Covid I occasionally checked my messages but just did not have the energy to respond unless I considered it essential to do so. The fatigue is real.

 

[jaysonsmom]

So glad your friend and his husband are okay! I am a natural worrywort, I would have probably have called a dozen times in one day, left several texts in CAPS that say “CALL ME iF YOU ARE ALIVE”. I have 2 teens, they get this from me all the time! You’re a good friend for not going wanting to intrude too much! Your restraint is admirable

 

[diamondringlover]

you are a good friend! glad they were ok!

 

[nala]

So glad your friend and his husband are okay! I am a natural worrywort, I would have probably have called a dozen times in one day, left several texts in CAPS that say “CALL ME iF YOU ARE ALIVE”. I have 2 teens, they get this from me all the time! You’re a good friend for not going wanting to intrude too much! Your restraint is admirable

Omg. I thought I was the only “stalker mom” as my DD puts it

 

[dk168]

Ten days ago a very close friend told me on the phone that he owed me about a thousand dollars for a project we are doing, and he'd get a check in the mail the next day.
No problem, I said.
He's always been very prompt with payments.

He also told me that a couple days back he tested positive for COVID.
I told him I wish I could cure your COVID, but let me know if there is anything I could do for you. Anything.
Like me he's older with significant medical conditions increasing his risk for serious COVID reactions, or worse.

It's now nearly 2 weeks after testing positive and I've gotten no text, voice mail, or email.
Even more concerning, no check, which is really out of character for him.

I don't have his husband's phone number or email, but they live nearby.

Here's my question.
Atheist here, but it's against my religion to just knock on anyone's door without calling first.
In this case should I just do that anyway.
Or maybe I should just leave them in the peace, which they might prefer during what is possibly a traumatic time?

I left a voice msg on his phone earlier.
Maybe I'll wait a day or two before knocking on their door.

Your thoughts?

Leave a note or card through the letter box address to him or both, asking after him and his OH, and include your contact details?

DK

Edited to say I posted this before reading the follow up posts.