Party timing question for guests!

[Independent Gal]

OK, I need the advice of you ''guests'' again (as opposed to us wedding planners over on BWW).

I''m becoming more and more attached to the idea of having the ceremony somewhere more formal than the restaurant where we''re hosting the reception (which was our initial thought). I found a place that''s GREAT. But my dad is making noises about how people will have to MOVE and how HORRIBLE that is. So my q''s are:

1) Is it really that horrible to ask guests to travel less than a mile? Or, in less inflammatory terms, when you''re a guest, do you SO STRONGLY prefer not having to move locations that I should take this seriously? It''s a 15 minute walk / $5 cab ride.

2) What is the optimum break, given the distance, between ceremony and reception? If we started the ceremony at 4:30, finished at 5, should we start cocktails at 6? Or earlier? Later? The space between the two locations is a vibrant market area, which would be fun to walk through at that time of day / year with lots of stalls selling produce, flowers, crafts, etc.

Thanks!

 

[peridot83]

No matter what I think you should start the cocktails as soon as possible after the ceremony. Some guests may not choose to enjoy the outdoor market, or may take a cab and head straight to the reception. Considering there is so little distance between the ceremony and reception, no one is going to want to go back to the hotel etc. in the interim....

As a result, you don''t want guests showing up at the restaurant and twiddling their thumbs with no food or drink for 1/2 an hour to an hour. Food and drinks = happy guests.

Whether moving locations is an inconvenience depends on a lot of factors (but I doubt people will really care that much):

Are your guests from in town or out? Is the city urban or suburban?

If it''s urban, and guests are used to urban, people are used to walking, hailing cabs, and most people won''t have cars with them anyway. In this situation, I think it''s fine to have the reception less than a mile away, and people won''t care about moving.

What creates trouble is when you have lots of people who are used to driving everywhere OR your reception venue is in a city where cabs aren''t readily available (like LA) and parking is a mess. A mile is far to walk in heels, and so many may opt to take their car and repark at the reception. If parking at the ceremony is a pain, and then reparking at the reception is a pain...you may get some cranky guests. If cabs aren''t readily available, there may be inconvenience both in getting to the reception, and especially AFTER the reception trying to get back to the hotel etc.

 

[Pandora II]

I really don''t think it''s a problem - the last wedding I was at in Siena, we had a 20 minute walk back to the coaches and then a 25 minute journey to the villa the reception was in.

On timings, I would start the drinks at 5.30 - 5.45 - that gives time for you to do a few photos in the ceremony venue, exit the venue to confetti etc - more photos and then the walk to the reception venue.

In Italy it''s common for the bride and groom to walk through the town - everyone shouts ''Auguri'' and comes up to congratulate them, so I can''t see why it wouldn''t be fun and work well in another country.

 

[Independent Gal]

It''s as urban as can be, though many guests will be from out of town. There is plentiful free parking near the ceremony site, but not so much near the reception site, so we''ll have to consider that!

There are lots of taxis, but maybe not for that many guests. So what we could do is call the cab company and ask them to send over 15-20 taxis timed for the end of the ceremony. 3-4 people per taxi... plus walkers, drivers, etc. and that should do it.

OK, so maybe we should be thinking more like: ceremony at 5:15... cocktails start at 6:00. That way, people who want to meander can do so (I guess we''ll serve dinner at 7) and those who want to bee-line to the drinks can do so.

Pandora: ever been in Rome near the Capitoline Hill on a Saturday or Sunday? All the brides with their entourages! I guess they all HAVE to get married there pre-church wedding. I was in Cortona last year and I saw three weddings in one day, but they were all British! I wonder where the Cortonese go to get hitched? Maybe they go to Rome.

 

[fleur-de-lis]

When you consider that people typically dress well for weddings (men in suits, women in strappy high heels), the mile is too far for most people to walk IMO. Women with blistered feet and men who are sweaty don''t really cultivate a celebratory mood.

Would it be possible to hire transportation like a shuttle bus for your guests between the two locations? Also (and pardon my American assumption weighing in on this issue, I don''t think I''ve read where you will be getting married), if people are arriving to the location originally by car, is it expected that they will park at location #1 or #2, and if so, how will they get back to their autos by the end of the evening?

So no, two locations are not insurmountable. You''ll just want to be thoughtful enough to make additional arrangements for the ease of your guests. Good luck!

 

[Independent Gal]

I''ve been thinking about the parking question. I''m going to ask my dad for advice since he is the one that drives in that city. We''ll locate some options and provide that information to guests along with the hotel information.

My guess is most people will leave their car (if they''ve brought one) at their hotel since they will be drinking.

I don''t think a shuttle bus is an option since I think some of the guests would find it weird. These are not ''group excursion'' type people, and they''d probably associate a bus with a school bus. These are people USED to walking, though maybe not in heels! hence the need for taxi options.

Hmmm... tricky. But not insurmountable.

I guess the thing that I should keep in mind is that for the last wedding I went to, I took a 50 dollar taxi ride, then a plane ride, then a city bus, then a 2 hour train ride, then rented a car and drove 90 miles to the middle of heaven-forsaken nowhere... and it never occured to me to even THINK to complain. I was just so happy for my friend. Since we are only inviting people we are very close to, I don''t think a 15 min walk / extra $5 cab ride is really going to make or break it!

That and start the cocktails as soon as we think guests would arrive.

 

[neatfreak]

I don''t think it is a big deal. With a few stipulations:

1. Let guests know AHEAD of time that if they want to walk, flat shoes are recommended. Also let them know about the limited parking and other options for transport.

2. Start the cocktails directly after the ceremony with only enough time in between for people to walk over. One of my biggest pet peeves is a lot of time inbetween. What the heck are you supposed to do? See a movie? As much as I love markets if I am in wedding clothes I would NOT want to have to burn 45 minutes in between...

Our ceremony location is about a 1/2 mile or less from the reception location and people can either drive or walk. It''s an easy walk, but we have let people know ahead of time that if they don''t drive, to wear comfy shoes to walk in!

 

[strmrdr]

hmmm around here the reception is usualy not right after, and sometimes 2 to 3 hours later and almost always at another location.
Id say 4 out of 5 that I have been too have been that way.

 

[zoebartlett]

I don''t think it will be a huge deal, although others have raised vaid considerations. I''ve never attended a wedding in a big city, and if I was the one driving, I''d be pretty nervous about it. That''s just me -- I don''t like driving in high traffic, big-city areas. That''s why I''d bring my FI along.

One thought I had and I''m not sure you''d be into this, but what about hiring/renting a trolley (or a coach or other type of bus) to take guests from the ceremony site to where the reception will be? Our ceremony and reception are at the same place and it''s 2 miles from the hotel we''ll stay at. My mom is thinking of renting a trolley to shuttle people back and forth, just so we don''t have to worry about drinking and driving (even though it''s a late-morning to afternoon affair). Just a thought.

 

[somethingshiny]

Apparently where I live is out of the ordinary. I have never been to a wedding and reception at the same place. Even those that weren''t performed in churches, the reception was at a hall, park, whatever. And every wedding I''ve been to, including my own, the reception doesn''t start for at least two hours after the ceremony. That way the wedding party can get their photos done, and the bride can change (if she has a second dress) and then drive time.

Oh, I guess my sister''s was at the same place. She got married at one end of the park, then we headed for the pavillion for a small gathering.

I think whatever the bride and groom want, they should have. IF a guest is that opposed to it, they don''t have to go.

Just my two cents.