Older men? Anyone dating/married to someone 10+ years older?

[diamondringlover]

My husband is 6 years older then me, I was 23 and he was getting ready to turn 29 when we got married, we did decide to have kids sooner because of his age, we had our first son when he turned 30, we had our second son when he was 42

he will be 60 when our youngest graduates from high school (of course I will still only be 45

lol). I will say this about having kids later in life, it is kind of a double edge sword, you do have more patience, but you do have alot less energy, but because of our son we must keep up on our health, we do not want to miss out on anything in his life, I hope that we can see him grow up and get married and have kids of his own.

My sisters husband is 22 years older then her, it wasnt a problem when they first got married, but now she acts as old as he does (she is 45 he is 67), they couldnt have kids, so I dont know if being married to someone that much older makes you feel older or what.

Good luck in whatever you choose, everyone has the right to be happy and if you are happy then it doesnt matter what anyone else anyone else thinks.

 

[Cravin My Emerald cut]

Oh my gosh, Mrs. Mitchell that''s almost exactly what I want! I like the bands that taper at the stone. My boyfriend heard that those bands make the diamond more prone to "popping out." I''ve tried to tell him that''s not true, but we shall see....

 

[ladypirate]

Date: 1/9/2008 5:10:25 PM
Author: sandia_rose

Date: 1/9/2008 4:20:21 PM

Author: SanDiegoLady

You are nearly my daughter''s age (she''ll be 23 in a few months).. and.. your boyfriend is my age.. while I don''t know either of you, yes, I have a problem with it. I lived through the ''age issue'' and its not always easy. My ex husband is 13 years older than I am. While there are MANY marriages that do in fact succeed regardless of the age, I found there were problems on lots of levels. Control being the first.



I was lucky enough to have found my now husband who is the same age as I.. I think that the reality is that I was supposed to be with my ''now'' husband all along with as often and as closely as our paths crossed over the years, its just weird.

This is similar to my past and present situations. My ex is 10+ years older than I am and he attempted to control me constantly (with help from his equally controlling family - my marriage was HELL). Fortunately, I had an education and a good job prior to meeting him and got out of that marriage after 4 years, so once I was divorced, I got back on my feet fairly easily. And like you, I don''t have total regret...I did get an amazing son out of that relationship.


And, the same situation with my present boyfriend of 2 years. We know many of the same people and our paths crossed constantly without our ever meeting prior. He was married for almost 20 years (he married very young). He is only 6 years older than I am, which, when you are 39 and 45, is inconsequential. It''s not weird at all.....I think the Universe waits until you are ready for something before it hands it to you, and sometimes, you have to work for that prize.


Here is a funny twist to this thread: What do you do when your boyfriend/husband LOOKS much older than you do? As you can see in the pic below, my boyfriend has salt and pepper hair. He went prematurely gray and has been like this as far as back into his 20s. I think it looks sexy as hell on him, so it''s never bothered me (and -- that picture was taken between sets at one of his band''s shows...it looks doubly hot when it''s freshly washed and curly!). If you look at his face as opposed to just noting his hair color, you can tell that he''s not ''an old dude.'' But lots of people don''t look closely. And I''m 39 and look much younger. I still get carded constantly. And to top it off, his 12 yo daughter physically resembles me (which, I have no clue how that happened - he had dark hair as a younger guy and his ex-wife is a Nordic-looking pale blond). So he gets asked all the time when we are out, ''Oh, are these your daughters?'' It doesn''t bother me but it ticks him off! Anyone else in that boat?


Bridget in Connecticut.

Bridget, I just wanted to say that you two look adorable together! I don''t think he looks too old for you at all.

 

[glitterbug]

Haven -- I totally relate to you! As it turns out, my BF also doesn''t look anywhere near his age, just like your FI. Most people think he is in his early 30s. Maybe that''s why the age thing never really occurred to me or bothered me when we met. I''m sure it was the same for you, too. That is really funny about your reaction to us being 28/40 btw, despite your own age diff being similar. I have to admit that I never thought twice about it when we were in our 20s and 30s respectively, but once he passed the 40 mark, the gap just *sounded* bigger to people, when clearly it was not. It''s only because of that small interval during which it seems like we''re 2 decades apart, when we''re really not. Funny stuff - and totally irrelevant if you ask me.

It''s great to hear from other ladies who are in similar situations!

 

[Mrs Mitchell]

Date: 1/9/2008 7:24:27 PM
Author: Cravin My Emerald cut
Oh my gosh, Mrs. Mitchell that''s almost exactly what I want! I like the bands that taper at the stone. My boyfriend heard that those bands make the diamond more prone to ''popping out.'' I''ve tried to tell him that''s not true, but we shall see....

Well, it''s been in there for a fair few years now! I get the prongs checked regularly, but they''ve never actually needed tightening. Haven''t had any problems with this setting, it''s fairly substantial! That said, it is booked in for a Leon reset later in the year though. It won''t be done till after the summer, because I''m taking it there myself from the UK when I visit family in New York. Almost impossible to get insurance on it to send from the UK to the US, for some reason.

I really love the setting and dont want to change much about it, but it isn''t the greatest quality. We didn''t know the difference when we bought it lol. I still love the stone and I''m far too sentimental to upgrade or change it too much, but I''m really excited about upgrading to a Leon solitaire.

Sorry, I''m hijacking your thread!

Jen

 

[Sha]

My husband is 8 years older than me. I''m 31, he''s 39. He also went prematurely grey and balding in his 20''s - so he wears the ''bald look'' now, which I think is sexy. Most people think he''s still in his 20''s.

We don''t have children yet - I guess he''ll be 40 and 42 when we have them - if all goes according to plan! That is older than I would have liked... but what can you do! I also wanted to have my children before the age of 30.... but that didn''t happen either.