Ok Ilander let's chat.

[hawaiianorangetree]

What a horrible dream! I hope nothing comes of it!

Today I took my daughter out to my mums. She has a large property with a gate we have to open to get in. Sometimes we have to shut it, sometimes we don't. Today I could see my mums little pony coco on her tether which means we don't have to shut the gate as she is tied up. When I pulled up next to kt who opened the gate she said to me "we don't have to shut the gate coz coco's on the lead" so we drove up to the house.

When I returned in the afternoon kt was in the pool and my mum and I were sitting at the table. She told me that coco had died. I said "what? Coco died today" and mum said no, on Wednesday. I was so confused because we had both seen her that morning in her spot on the grass. I told mum that we had seen her and she commented on how it was strange, especially since my daughter saw her too.

Mum said that she had seen our last pony who had died, in the paddock just after she was put down last year too. So it seems like these things do cross over the generations.

Whoa. I would say a shade from the past, others might say a ghost.

Bizarre.

Your shades from the past theory makes a lot of sense now that I have 'experienced' it.

My mum found a lot of comfort in the thought that she is still out there eating the grass because she blames herself for her death. I'm glad I saw her because it gave me the opportunity to give my mum a little peace.

Im interested to hear what my daughter thought about it all too.

 

[vintagelover229]

iLander, your theories are making a lot of sense to me!

And I have a question for you all: Light bulbs. Do you blow them all the time? Like, ALLLLLL the FREAKIN' TIME?!?!

I do this constantly, and it drives my DH up the wall. I've gotten used to it I guess, because it's happened with some regularity for years now. I'll flip the switch and . . . POP! Out goes the light bulb. I can probably count on one hand the number of times in our seven-year relationship that this has happened to DH, but I can't even begin to count the number of times it's happened to me during that same seven years.

Before anyone asks, I know it's not a wiring issue, because it happens in many other places besides just our house. Also, DH is an electrician and he has completely rewired our house, so we're 100% sure that there's nothing wrong with the wiring. (Besides, if it were a wiring issue, I would think DH would blow the bulbs just as often as I do.) Also, this is one thing that doesn't seem to run in my family . . . as far as I know, I'm the only one who has this problem. It seems to happen most often when I'm stressed or upset about something. I think my all-time record was five light bulbs in one week. If I keep going at this rate, we should all buy stock in GE!!!

It's funny that you mention that, my DH has an issue with lights. He turns off street lights when he goes by. All. the. time. It's almost funny.

I thought it was related to an accident he had as a child, where he flew a toy airplane (on wire string) into high tension wires and basically died for a short while. (I didn't add to the near-death thread because he didn't see any white lights or anything) The only reason he didn't die is because he had a random tack in his shoe, and the voltage passed through his body and into the ground. He didn't even know he had the tack! I figured the street lights was some kind of energy or residual electricity that he threw off.

Do you think you have some kind of residual energy for some reason? I think DH does, maybe you do too.

Freaky world ain't it?

So...just as I was reading about the light blubs blowing out I was thinking about how street lights turn OFF when I walk by them. When I get away from them...they turn back on! I said something to a few ppl and they thought I was kidding until they seen it for themselves and I couldn't ever figure out why they did that to me. In my mind wouldn't it make more sense that they'd turn ON when someone walked by (like a sensor) and not OFF when I walk by and ON again once I'm about 10ft away? I haven't ever almost died (that I'm aware) and I've thought I was crazy because of this. When I was younger I used to have daja vu and dreams that would come true. I haven't had it happen in years though...wonder if I can get it back?

Ilander I'm glad you told me your theories. As a Christian I believe in a spiritual dimension that we can't see that is in it's own time as well and so it falls pretty close in line with what your wrote and made a lot of sense. I firmly believe that there are other planes/dimensions that exists in different time than ours. What's that book? A wrinkle in time? I loved that when I was a kid.

Why do you think the street lights go off with me? When my mom was pregnant with me she was drinking and driving and ran into a brick house, but I was okay (and still think I'm ok). Any idea what it could be? I'm SO happy to hear I'm not alone in the street light thing! Whew!

 

[dragonfly411]

Ilander - Your ideas make a lot of sense to me in some ways, and in some ways I just feel like there has to be more. Do you think that these shadows of a past time would watch over a person the same way they would have in a past time? My main confusion is the talking. Sometimes I know they are trying to get my attention, like shouting HEY in my ear. But my most recent two make no sense to me. Here they are:

The first one worked like this: A voice (male) repeatedly said "So.... number three's the limit" and after he said it a third time there was an image of bright blue... sortof fading by.

The second one: "We are them and they are us" was repeated three times, loudly, over the "Dutch" sounding voices I heard.


Things like that confuse me. I don't understand them.


In terms of future versus past, I think what you are saying makes a lot of sense because it also would explain how some of us see "ghosts" while others are future seers. Some of us would be more intuitive to the past, while others are more so to the future. Yes?

I think the voices are from someone in the past, who said those words at that location. You have the openess to be able to perceive that, which I think makes you very lucky. Did you try to go back to those locations and see if it happened again?

Or you could very well be right, they could be spirits. I certainly have no way to verify either idea!

Or maybe it's a hybrid of both of our ideas. There could be people from the past or the future that can use energy to jump through the layers of time.

This thread is reminding me of why I like Star Trek so much, their plots are full of this stuff.

Ilander - I think I agree that it is a hybrid of the ideas. I've said before, I feel like our souls and emotions are a form of energy and they cannot just dissipate. Perhaps they are able to use energy as you said as well. My great grandmother's presence was always felt in that closet, but I cannot ever remember her going in there in her lifetime. She died before the house was even finished.

I've slept pretty deeply, so nothing new to report really in terms of dreams or anything else.

Ilander - also, generally when I hear anyone talking it's as I'm laying down and just resting before going to sleep. I'm consciously awake, but generally eyes closed. I've never been given any type of images with this, just what is said, so I don't know where they would be, nor any facial features. Sometimes there will be tons of voices, and I'll pick up on one or the other thing in the mix. Sometimes there will be one distinct voice, or a few.

 

[Autumnovember]

Sorry I'm taking 40 yrs, DF. So much work BUT...when I take my break today I'll type up some of my stories---there are so many, I'm not sure where to even begin!!!

 

[dragonfly411]

Autumn - I'll be waiting... Impatiently hehe. I need to do the same for everyone here, in chronological order.

 

[Autumnovember]

Alright so here it goes...

A guy that I was friends with and dating died in 2004....he was only 17 at the time. It was one of the first deaths that I experienced besides my grandmother who passed when I was in 6th grade (and never met) and my grandfather who passed away when I was in high school. My friends death was extremely tragic to me and everyone else that got the chance to know his beautiful soul. Like any other tragic news, I was in complete denial at first. I thought it was a mistake and he was surely in the hospital. Several hours later, the news was confirmed; he had been hit a car and hit hard enough that the impact of the first car threw him into opposing traffic and he was hit by a second car. Strangely enough, one of the cars that hit him was the exact same make and model of the car I had been driving during those years.

The following night there was a candlelit vigil in memory of him.

There were many times prior to his death that we talked on the phone into the wee hours of the morning. Typical teen conversations about the most random things you could think of. One time, I asked him if he could be any kind of animal, what would it be? He told me a bird. I laughed and expressed my disappointment in such a boring choice. He explained that birds could fly and that there is nothing better than that.

The vigil was held at a common place in our town that was newly built with a pretty waterfall and a beautiful clock in front of it. I sat on the ledge shortly after we got there and happened to look down into the accumulating water beside me (from the waterfall) and noticed a dead bird floating in the water. Initially, I didn't know what to think or what to make of that. I saw that my best friend noticed it too. Later, I told them what kind of conversation him and I had weeks prior about being a bird. We all decided it had to be some sort of sign.

Fast forward 1 week to his funeral. I cannot explain how many people were there for the burial. It's all still so fresh in my mind. There was a very very large crowd of people standing around the burial site and I remember walking towards the crowd. I remember looking up in the sky and noticing two birds flying around the large group of people. Again, I thought maybe it meant something. The birds didn't go away soon either. They stayed for a while. A few night before the funeral, I had written a letter to him that I wanted to put into his casket (my mom didn't let me). That night, I had a dream with him in it. In this dream, I was lying in my bed and he was sitting across from me in my computer chair. He was reading my letter aloud word for word. I remember him looking at me and telling me that everything was fine. It felt so real.

Several months had passed and we visited every month for a long time. Buried diagonally from him was a boy who died a year before him. I remember noticing this boy's stone because of his young age and the fact that the head stone had his picture engraved in it. One day, on our way to the cemetery we (me and two friends) were passing by a local park and we started talking about how sad it was that a boy close to our age had commit suicide in that particular park. We talked about how tragic it was, especially because it lead to a chain reaction of suicides shortly after. We got to the cemetery and did the usual; talked about memories, laughed and cried. There was one other person at the cemetery that day and she was busy planting flowers at a head stone. Out of no where, a few birds started circling above us. I told my friends to start counting them because there were more and more and more coming. We all counted...and got 14 total. Our friend was born on 04/01...we were all stunned. At this point, I was still skeptical about any signs and if any of them DEFINITELY meant something. A few minutes later, the lady planting flowers called us over and asked if we could help her carry soil from her car to the grave she was planting at because she had a bad back. We helped her, of course. I took notice to the fact that she was planting flowers at the headstone of the boy who was close to our friends in age that died a year before. She asked who we were there for and we told her the story of how our friend passed. She then told us that her son had commit suicide at the local park a year ago. I don't think I was able to speak for a minute straight. I couldn't believe we were talking about this particular boy on the way to the cemetery and here was his mom...planting flowers at his grave. Her next question was if we ever got any signs from him since his death...I told her that I thought maybe a few but I was still skeptical. I remember her asking if birds signified anything. And they did. She told us she had never ever seen so many birds in that area at one time in the entire year she had been coming to the cemetery. She told me it had to have been our friend giving us some sort of sign, trying to communicate. She also told us that on her way to the cemetery she was praying to her son to send someone to help her with carrying the soil and when she saw us pull in she knew her prayers were heard.

That was the beginning of many more signs. I had many, many, many dreams where we "met" and talked. In one dream, I remember we were laying in my bed and my head was resting on his chest. He didn't have a shirt on or anything and I remember listening to his laugh and him telling me how he knows how much I miss it. What I remember most is smelling his chest which smelled like the funeral home did when we walked in there for the viewing. I woke up after that. Another dream I had was not like a typical dream. It was just black and the sound of a voice. The voice was telling me that he was ok, to stop worrying, and that he knew I missed him so much.

On one of his anniversary's, I decided to take out the bag that I had his shorts in, along with a few newspaper articles after the accident happened. I was reading the article when I heard a light thump. I looked EVERYWHERE around me to see if something fell out onto my carpeted floor and there was nothing. I remember being very very sad at the time from the flood of memories of how it all happened. When I finished reading the article I looked over to my right and noticed a shiny penny beside me. I knew I got up and looked to see if anything fell and it wasn't there the first time so I have no idea how it got there. Before I picked the penny up, I told myself that if it had the year "2004" on it, it had to be my friend giving me a sign that he was near. This is significant because after the wake there was a lunch that was held and on all the tables there was a poem called "penny's from heaven" with pennies scattered along all of the tables. I picked the penny up and turned it over to look at the year. 2004. I knew. I just knew that he was there. Moments later "his" song came on, "I'll be missing you" and that further solidified it for me. This was not the only penny incident that happened. The other one happened to his mother. She was going to a local store and pulled into the parking lot and was about to park her car. Right before she pulled into a spot, her daughter stopped her and told her to pull into the next one instead. When they got out...the parking spot she was about to originally park in had a TON of pennies scattered all over it. They picked up every single one of them and counted. 94 pennies. He passed away on 9/4.

There was another incident when me and his mom went out to breakfast at a local restaurant. We often talk about memories that involved him as it makes us both smile and laugh most of the time. We were both drinking tea out of mugs and reminiscing. Casually, I was twisting my cup here and there, when I noticed something interesting. My cup had the word 'Annapolis' printed across it. I gasped slightly and turned it so that it was in her view. She read it and we didn't even have to exchange words to know what we were both thinking. I looked at the time. 9:00. He passed away at 9:00. The clocks "numbers" weren't "numbers" but instead they were birds. She noticed too and the flow of tears came streaming down her face.

A story she shared with me was about a time that was very soon after his death. She told me she was sitting in her home, questioning why God let this happen to him. She had the bible in front of her and decided she would open it to a random page and point to a random verse. When she did this, her finger was on a passage that explained that "his work here is done," that he was an "angel sent by the Lord to do his job and that it was now complete." I think after this, it wasn't necessarily easier but it at least gave her some sense of peace.

I also had another experience when I was in Mexico. I had just visited an absolutely BEAUTIFUL cenote (underground cave) and we were on our way back to the hotel in the van. I remember looking outside of the window and seeing the sunshine rays piercing through the clouds so strongly. I felt him. It's not a feeling I can even accurately describe but it was a feeling of -knowing-. I just knew that he was watching me experience all that beauty that day.

There were so many times when his "song" came on during very peculiar times and we often felt his presence.

It has become very very less frequent over the years, as I have let myself have peace with the situation. Sometimes I wish it didn't stop. Sometimes I really wish that he would still communicate because while it was a bit bitter, it was so much more sweet.

I've thought about seeing someone who has the ability to communicate with those that have passed on but I haven't been able to find someone that I believe 100% in.


P.S. I apologize for any grammar mistakes...too burnt out from studying all day to correct anything.

 

[iLander]

AN, I love your story.

I think yes, he is reaching out to you, from the plane that he is on. Einstein said energy can be neither created nor destroyed, and I believe consciousness is a form of energy. He has become part of the energy that unites us all, and that flows through everything. I don't believe people cease to exist, I think they are just released from their present form. Taoists consider death to be a new awakening, something to be celebrated, not mourned. When people pass, I cry for my own feelings of loss and emptiness. I don't cry for them, because they are still here.

I went to a palm reader (he was amazing, I can tell a good psychic from a fake psychic from out in the parking lot, BTW) clairovoyent (sp?) once. He pointed to a line that twinned my lifeline and said it was someone that had passed away that was watching over me. He counted out the time and it directly correlated to the year my mother passed away. I talk to her sometimes. Her words come to me in writing, I can see the text, letter by letter, so it takes a while. But hey, whatever works.

If anyone is into palmistry (while we're here) I have a perfect star in the middle of my right palm. No one (not even the really good palmist) seems to know what that is. It's shaped just like if you were to draw a star on a piece of paper with a pen (start at the bottom, cross diagonally to the upper left, straight across, etc.). If anyone has an ideas, I'd like to hear it.

 

[iLander]

Ilander - also, generally when I hear anyone talking it's as I'm laying down and just resting before going to sleep. I'm consciously awake, but generally eyes closed. I've never been given any type of images with this, just what is said, so I don't know where they would be, nor any facial features. Sometimes there will be tons of voices, and I'll pick up on one or the other thing in the mix. Sometimes there will be one distinct voice, or a few.

When you are relaxed and semi-conscious it is easier for your mind to travel outside the mind's construct of time perception. You are traveling through time and hearing the voices from the past.

Boy, if I keep this up, I will be considered the looniest member of this board.

Well, I guess somebody has to be.

 

[merilenda]

These topics are very interesting to me, especially after my dad died this past year. However, I feel like I have very little perception for these kinds of things. On one hand, I want to believe in them. And I don't feel like it's my place to say that what other people perceive is not real. But it's so hard for me to understand because I have never had an experience like that.

I tried really hard to be open to messages from my dad after his death. Eventually I kind of gave up I guess, because I felt like I wasn't getting anything. My uncle also passed away a few years ago - he and my dad were pretty much my only family besides my mom (who is living, but we don't get along very well). I also haven't really felt anything from him since his death.

I'm interested to hear the perspective of others though. I'd also love to see someone who might have the abilities to communicate with them one day, but I feel like this is an area where it can be hard to trust people.

 

[dragonfly411]

AN, I love your story.

I think yes, he is reaching out to you, from the plane that he is on. Einstein said energy can be neither created nor destroyed, and I believe consciousness is a form of energy. He has become part of the energy that unites us all, and that flows through everything. I don't believe people cease to exist, I think they are just released from their present form. Taoists consider death to be a new awakening, something to be celebrated, not mourned. When people pass, I cry for my own feelings of loss and emptiness. I don't cry for them, because they are still here.

I went to a palm reader (he was amazing, I can tell a good psychic from a fake psychic from out in the parking lot, BTW) clairovoyent (sp?) once. He pointed to a line that twinned my lifeline and said it was someone that had passed away that was watching over me. He counted out the time and it directly correlated to the year my mother passed away. I talk to her sometimes. Her words come to me in writing, I can see the text, letter by letter, so it takes a while. But hey, whatever works.

If anyone is into palmistry (while we're here) I have a perfect star in the middle of my right palm. No one (not even the really good palmist) seems to know what that is. It's shaped just like if you were to draw a star on a piece of paper with a pen (start at the bottom, cross diagonally to the upper left, straight across, etc.). If anyone has an ideas, I'd like to hear it.

THIS - This is what I've been thinking/feeling lately.


AN - your story hits SO CLOSE to home to me with my friend who died. For him there were a multitude of events related to wildlife, including deer, owls, and white doves. When owls are close, I know he is close and watching me. The night of his candle vigil, as I lit his candle at home, an owl came and sat with me, and flew away when I blew the candle out. Since then, owls seem to show up when I'm in the most emotional turmoil. For his mother, deer. For another close friend, a white dove. Always at our most challenging moments. I think your friend must have loved you a great deal, and he's watching out for you yes.

Ilan - you are not loony. If you are then I am even more so I think lol.

 

[dragonfly411]

bumping for amc

 

[Autumnovember]

Verrrrry interested in this thread too. Not sure if you guys remembered the post I made about all of the things that happened to me after my friends death? Also posted something on a social network site about something recent as well. Ill be keeping an eye on this one!

ETA: I didn't even realize this was an older thread!

 

[Autumnovember]

I'm interested in this thread as well. I know a Ph D psychologist that is also a clairvoyant. I was telling her that when I was a little girl, I always dreamt of being a medium. I told her I wanted so badly to be psychic. She said, "if you dreamt it as a child and you want it, you already have the ability, you just need to know how to access it."

What do you think? Sometimes I feel a bit clairvoyant, and other times, I think, "meh, I think everyone gets that." Is clairvoyance something that can be learned by anyone willing to try or is it something you're born with and you KNOW you have.

I meditate often, and once, during a guided meditation, I met with my future self and together, we went back to a (negative) moment in my past and told myself that everything was going to be alright. It was such a profound experience. I had tears streaming down my face. That's the most spiritual/clairvoyant moment I've ever had.

I hope I'm not threadjacking DF. If you have any insight, I'd love to hear it as well.

I always dreamt of that too, interesting..and always wondered the same things as you too.

 

[suchende]

I am not saying I think this is common, but a friend of mine had voices and what she thought were ghost presences, at first rarely and then more often and tormenting, and it turned out they were being caused by a brain tumor. I am not trying to say anyone ITT is crazy or sick because of the experiences they have, but I know she delayed medical treatment because she thought she was having a spiritual experience, so I thought I would just mention it.

 

[susimoo]

To everyone who has posted here, please post some more!!!

I have found great strength in your stories. I lost my Dad almost 6 weeks ago and I have found it very difficult dealing with the after effects. Especially as I am not religious, I cannot fathom out where he went. He was sitting in his chair talking and then gone in a blink of an eye. (for want of a better description, sorry)
I feel he isn't here physically, but I don't feel he is far from me.
Your words helped me understand my feelings a bit better, although there has been no physical signs, I just get a sense of him.

So please, if you can, continue your discussions, swap stories, as you are giving me a great sense of relief and understanding. For that, I am very grateful.

 

[Amys Bling]

I am so interested in this type of stuff! I am always amazed at these abilities that other people have and wish I had them too! or maybe I do and I have never really noticed it...

 

[iLander]

To everyone who has posted here, please post some more!!!

I have found great strength in your stories. I lost my Dad almost 6 weeks ago and I have found it very difficult dealing with the after effects. Especially as I am not religious, I cannot fathom out where he went. He was sitting in his chair talking and then gone in a blink of an eye. (for want of a better description, sorry)
I feel he isn't here physically, but I don't feel he is far from me.
Your words helped me understand my feelings a bit better, although there has been no physical signs, I just get a sense of him.

So please, if you can, continue your discussions, swap stories, as you are giving me a great sense of relief and understanding. For that, I am very grateful.

He probably is near you every day. There's no reason he needs to be in one place or one time any more. Take comfort in that.

 

[iLander]

I am not saying I think this is common, but a friend of mine had voices and what she thought were ghost presences, at first rarely and then more often and tormenting, and it turned out they were being caused by a brain tumor. I am not trying to say anyone ITT is crazy or sick because of the experiences they have, but I know she delayed medical treatment because she thought she was having a spiritual experience, so I thought I would just mention it.

This is very good to know. Thanks for that, it could prove useful to someone.

What happened to your friend, how did they treat it?

 

[suchende]

I am not saying I think this is common, but a friend of mine had voices and what she thought were ghost presences, at first rarely and then more often and tormenting, and it turned out they were being caused by a brain tumor. I am not trying to say anyone ITT is crazy or sick because of the experiences they have, but I know she delayed medical treatment because she thought she was having a spiritual experience, so I thought I would just mention it.

This is very good to know. Thanks for that, it could prove useful to someone.

What happened to your friend, how did they treat it?

Sorry, that should have read "friend of mine's mom." She passed away.

 

[JewelFreak]

Many people get messages from those who have gone on; I used to wonder if we become one with some great energy. I believe now we keep our own consciousness in a pure form. Say, somebody has OCD that may have affected his outlook -- that is physical & is gone once the body is. He is his true self, without the "extras."

There was poverty in my father's family background & he & his brother had a strong drive to succeed financially. Dad was down to earth, honest, a thinking man, but at the same time admired wealth as an indication of success -- his father had been dirt poor. Drive an expensive car, live in a big house, send kids to top colleges: all meant a great deal to him. He made clear he loved us no matter what, without conditions, that money was not the measure of the man. At the same time, he couldn't help admiring the ability to acquire stuff. To him it meant you excelled.

He died when I was 17. I grieved for decades. We were vacationing on Cape Cod when he had a heart attack in the night. I literally saw him leave, but that's another story.

A little later I had a dream surreal in its clarity -- edges sharper, colors more defined. The family -- Mom, my brothers, sister & I -- sat on the floor in my bedroom gathered around a Monopoly-type board, buying & owning & competing for things. It engrossed us completely. Dad circled behind us. "Listen to me! You've got to understand," he pleaded desperately, "This isn't important! I've learned so much! Listen to me please. This doesn't matter!" We were annoyed, didn't stop even to turn to him. Waved him away: "Dad, not now! It's my turn...I've got to get that hotel." Dice rolled. "Stop," he begged, "listen to what I've learned. This doesn't matter!" We snapped at him, "Later, Dad, we're really busy! Not now!" He wrung his hands in frustration & repeated over & over, "I've learned so much. This isn't important! It doesn't matter!" We continued playing.

I woke up knowing he came to give me that message, the more powerful because he had not known it in life -- and because I, like him, put too much into having things. "I've learned so much" rang in my ears. It took me 30 years to truly understand, but that scene came back to me many many times, as did certainty of his presence.

--- Laurie

 

[rhbgirl24]

This was great reading this. My family and I have had many similar things happen to us with my Pop Pop. He absolutely, without a doubt, sends butterflies to us. He was called the butterfly man in his child bearing years because he made these very intricately painted wooden butterflies that he would sell and people would hang on their house. Beautiful.

Almost every time I think of him or really need him a butterfly comes on by. Sometimes it has landed on me, somethings it just hovers. This has happened in every season, even winter, when NJ just simply doesn't have butterflies.

The most recent event was my sister planning for her wedding. She was completely stressed about the venue. Her first choice was waaaay out of budget, and she was having a really hard time finding something her fiance and her liked as much. She was getting really sad about it. I set up two viewings for wineries much more south than where she was looking just because I thought they would be worth looking at. The second one we visted that day, we got out of the car to hundreds of butterflies flying around us. They were everywhere - the ceremony site, the whole venue was covered! They just happened to be running a one day booking sale, had her preferred date open because a bride just moved her day, and required the exact same amount they saved for their holding fee. It was just fate - and pop pop brought us there.

My Mom mom (pop pop's wife) has always had visions - mostly in dreams. She knows when someone is hurt, going into labor, or who is on the phone when it rings. She says I have it too, and I've experienced little things, just don't know how to open myself to something bigger.

 

[dragonfly411]

Ilander - I'm going to up this and you may not be able to help at all, as I really can't give much information without giving a lot of things away, and if you can't I understand, but I thought I'd ask. I'm in a really torn spot right now, and I've also been facing a lot of hurdles that are very challenging. I just wondered if you felt anything good coming my way, or any kind of decision on the torn stuff. I wish I could give more detail but I really can't right now. Anyways, maybe you'll have some insight. If not then that's cool too lol.

 

[iLander]

Ilander - I'm going to up this and you may not be able to help at all, as I really can't give much information without giving a lot of things away, and if you can't I understand, but I thought I'd ask. I'm in a really torn spot right now, and I've also been facing a lot of hurdles that are very challenging. I just wondered if you felt anything good coming my way, or any kind of decision on the torn stuff. I wish I could give more detail but I really can't right now. Anyways, maybe you'll have some insight. If not then that's cool too lol.

I don't feel like there is a decision that has been made. For some reason the word "no" seems like a big scary thing for you. In the long run, it really isn't, life won't change that much. But again, "no" is not the answer. There is not an answer yet, the decision has not been made. I have no idea why I'm saying any of this, it's not really my area. . .

But I do feel like there is also someone you knew from a long time ago that thought of you the other day and that you should call them. They thought of you professionally, and don't know how to reach you now. That's what I get when I think of you and your horses (ugh, so smelly today Thank God they're beautiful, right?). This I am sure of. Call a bunch of people "just to catch up".

I feel like it will continue to be a slog for a while, there seems to be some kind of molasses in EVERYONE'S cosmic shoes. I find it extremely irritating, myself. This I am sure of, the whole planet seems to be mired in non-action. It's very odd. But I think it can go again, everyone has to dig deep and push to move things along. Now's not the time to be passive. A gentle nudge is needed. Then things will pick up pace and by november we'll all be surprised how busy it's become.

But then again, I have no idea what you're asking me.

While I've got you, you mentioned a controlling relationship in your past; what made you finally realize and leave?

 

[Autumnovember]

Dragon, apologies for threadjacking---

iLander, since we're on topic....anyone from my past that hasn't possibly 'let go' yet? Trying to make sense of some events over the last few years, thinking maybe thats the reason why some of the things that happen to me, do.


Also...will I make it through my program without failing any classes? You can lie and say yes

 

[dragonfly411]

Ilander - All of what you said makes sense. I'll make sure to make the phone calls. I can think of several people horse related who wouldn't know how to reach me now. I actually had a horse incdent earlier this week, so although YES they are smelly (esp the guy who is hurting b/c he's on drugs), I do love them right now. We almost lost him the other night. As to the molasses, that makes sense too b/c we're currently battling with some court stuff...which requires us to battle with some financial stuff.. and people just can't seem to get it in gear!

As to the relationship part. I'll be honest hon... it took the following for me to wake up. He called me one night at 5 AM and said he needed me b/c he was throwing up and he didn't know why. When I got there, his roommate (who has since passed away and who is the one whose spirit stuck with me for a bit) was waiting for me. He helped me get water into my ex, and kept an eye on things. My ex was too drunk to know who he was, yet he still managed to get up and try to force himself on me... essentially drunkenly trying to rape me. I had known that things were very out of control, but that night his friend told me if I didn't leave I was absolutely stupid. The guy had cheated on me with three other women. He used me for sexual activity and I'm sad that I let it go for so long. At the same time I would not have found the people I have today, so I'm sometimes a teensy bit thankful. Looking back, I don't know how I let it go so far though.

Autumnovember - Yes. And I am not lying.

 

[asymons412]

This thread is very interesting. I don't consider my paranoia much more than paranoia at times ( ), and to be honest I would give the world for a concrete sign from my father who passed away in 2004, but I did have a very strange [unrelated] dream the other night for which I'd love some insight.

I didn't remember dreaming until I dreamed waking up; I opened my eyes and standing over my bed (on my fiance's side) was an old friend from highschool, with this crazy yellow plastic outward-protruding figurine tied over his face and pointing straight forward. He was just standing there, still, watching. I remember feeling a moment of absolute terror before I actually did wake up. I have never, ever had a dream such as this. Has anyone else ever experienced these right-before-waking moments where you actually think you've woken up? I couldn't help but wonder if someone or something will ill intent was actually present in the room. But then again, I have a ridiculous fear of aliens (don't get me started!) and so I tend to dismiss myself...

 

[dragonfly411]

Asymons - Are you completely sure you were still asleep? I ask because I tend to have experiences when my mind is relaxed, such is right before sleeping or just after waking up, or when I'm driving in a car (which I get very relaxed and sort of zoned when driving).

It's funny that you had that dream last night because I had one last night. I dreamed I was in my first house, where I lived with my parents. I went to go to bed at around 4 am but my closet and my bedroom doors would not stay open. I got a very strong sense of evil presence so I ran screaming to my parents room and climbed in their bed, but they weren't there. My cat who I just got 8 months ago was there though and he curled up with me. I woke up right after that. The interesting part about the cat is it seems that cats serve as something of guardians for me. I had a cat who I swear was a reincarnate of my great grandmother's cat. She had the same skittish personality, wouldn't let anyone else hold her, same color, build and markings. They both were around at the heights of my... encounters. I now have my black cat who served as a comfort/safety in my dream. Odd.

 

[iLander]

Dragon, apologies for threadjacking---

iLander, since we're on topic....anyone from my past that hasn't possibly 'let go' yet? Trying to make sense of some events over the last few years, thinking maybe thats the reason why some of the things that happen to me, do.


Also...will I make it through my program without failing any classes? You can lie and say yes

On the grades; oh, please, I think you're one of those people that gets amazing grades all the time. Not a problem for you.

Brown haired guy was thinking about you and comparing you to new girl, but she's won out and he's moving forward with her. He just had cold feet.

That's all I get . . .

 

[iLander]

Ilander - All of what you said makes sense. I'll make sure to make the phone calls. I can think of several people horse related who wouldn't know how to reach me now. I actually had a horse incdent earlier this week, so although YES they are smelly (esp the guy who is hurting b/c he's on drugs), I do love them right now. We almost lost him the other night. As to the molasses, that makes sense too b/c we're currently battling with some court stuff...which requires us to battle with some financial stuff.. and people just can't seem to get it in gear!

As to the relationship part. I'll be honest hon... it took the following for me to wake up. He called me one night at 5 AM and said he needed me b/c he was throwing up and he didn't know why. When I got there, his roommate (who has since passed away and who is the one whose spirit stuck with me for a bit) was waiting for me. He helped me get water into my ex, and kept an eye on things. My ex was too drunk to know who he was, yet he still managed to get up and try to force himself on me... essentially drunkenly trying to rape me. I had known that things were very out of control, but that night his friend told me if I didn't leave I was absolutely stupid. The guy had cheated on me with three other women. He used me for sexual activity and I'm sad that I let it go for so long. At the same time I would not have found the people I have today, so I'm sometimes a teensy bit thankful. Looking back, I don't know how I let it go so far though.

Autumnovember - Yes. And I am not lying.

Dragonfly, I'm sorry that you went through this. I think you need to realize that some people are just screwed up, and it has nothing to do with you. They are screwed up with EVERYBODY, not just you. That guy is obviously an a$$!

Wish I could help you with the "torn" thing, I just can't get a handle on that . . .

 

[iLander]

This thread is very interesting. I don't consider my paranoia much more than paranoia at times ( ), and to be honest I would give the world for a concrete sign from my father who passed away in 2004, but I did have a very strange [unrelated] dream the other night for which I'd love some insight.

I didn't remember dreaming until I dreamed waking up; I opened my eyes and standing over my bed (on my fiance's side) was an old friend from highschool, with this crazy yellow plastic outward-protruding figurine tied over his face and pointing straight forward. He was just standing there, still, watching. I remember feeling a moment of absolute terror before I actually did wake up. I have never, ever had a dream such as this. Has anyone else ever experienced these right-before-waking moments where you actually think you've woken up? I couldn't help but wonder if someone or something will ill intent was actually present in the room. But then again, I have a ridiculous fear of aliens (don't get me started!) and so I tend to dismiss myself...

Sorry, I don't do dreams. They're always your subconscious mind trying to resolve an issue so that your conscious mind can deal with it and move on. Basically, whatever you're thinking about a lot fires your synapses repeatedly, and when you're sleeping, there's residual energy there and the synapses fire a little more. Like a muscle twitching after a hard work out.

Also, there's no reason to fear aliens, since they don't exist. It's good to dismiss yourself sometimes, it helps you realize you don't have to be a victim of your thoughts.

Maybe someone else here will do a dream interpretation?