My preschooler doesn''t eat her lunch! what to do!

[D&T]

I sent my 4 year old to kindergarten prep...ok preschool but at an elementary school environment all day just this past Monday. I packed her turkey sandwich lunch a couple of times she ate it the first two days, then I packed hot lunch - chicken alfredo, and another chicken potatoe/pie however she doesn''t eat all of her hot lunches if any on both those days....She does eat her fruits, and a few pieces of carrots, raisins. The classes have snacks twice a day, so what to do? I also have a prepaid meal voucher just in case for those days I run late. So should I see if she will eat school lunch? or just keep packing the same old thing? I just want to make sure she eats.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

She''s not going to let herself starve. Have you checked to see how long her lunch time is? Last year when my son was in kindergarten, he would always bring home about 1/2 his lunch and when I asked him about it, he said he never has enough time to eat it all. I asked his teacher and she said that my son was a SLOW eater and when everyone else was done, he was still taking his sweet old time.

Like I said, your daughter won''t starve herself. How long has she been at the school? I wouldn''t turn quickly to school lunches b/c they''re all junk. My kids get them as a TREAT once a week and I consider it comparable to McDonald''s. (that is one of the food options on their menu is a pretzel! No nutrition.)

 

[D&T]

Date: 12/3/2009 7:52:45 PM
Author: MC
She''s not going to let herself starve. Have you checked to see how long her lunch time is? Last year when my son was in kindergarten, he would always bring home about 1/2 his lunch and when I asked him about it, he said he never has enough time to eat it all. I asked his teacher and she said that my son was a SLOW eater and when everyone else was done, he was still taking his sweet old time.

Like I said, your daughter won''t starve herself. How long has she been at the school? I wouldn''t turn quickly to school lunches b/c they''re all junk. My kids get them as a TREAT once a week and I consider it comparable to McDonald''s. (that is one of the food options on their menu is a pretzel! No nutrition.)

Thanks MC! she''s only started this week. I''ll try again with the hot lunches next week, DH and I said maybe we''ll let her eat school lunch on Fridays (like you once a week for a treat) Her lunch bag and items I pack don''t need any help from the teacher. I''ll check for sure on the amount of time they have for lunches.

I have the menu of school lunch and it doesn''t seem that bad at all... Chef Salad pack, sub sandwich pack, chicken caesar salad, and then of course, the hamburger, chicken nuggets, chalupa menu too

.

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Yes, in addition to checking the lunch length, keep in mind how long it takes to eat a carrot or some fruit, like apples. Lots of crunching time. Apple sauce is an excellent alternative because your daughter can easily spoon it on in. I buy the no sugar added sauce and a box of plastic spoons and give those to my kids a few times a week.

FWIW, I''d say about 75% of the time, my kids bring home part of their lunches. It''s frustrating so I''ve learned to tailor their foods around that so we''re not wasting a ton of money. PB&J sandwiches are cheap. Unfortunelty they began complaining about being sick of them so now we''re onto cheese sandwiches.

 

[cellososweet]

I used to nanny for a 4 year old and he never finished his lunch. I agree that they won''t let themselves starve. If it''s not a time constraint and she''s just a slow eater or stops when she''s full, then I think this behavior can be a good thing in the long run. My DH learned to shovel his whole lunch into his mouth in 15 minutes as a kid and hence he overeats. I''ve spent the last few years trying to get him to slooooow down. His tummy aches have gone down markedly.

 

[D&T]

Thanks again MC and Cello! you are sooo right, DD won''t let herself starve...lol she always tells me if she''s hungry or wants snack. I do pack enough so she''ll eat her lunch items for snacks even while we''re driving home

I guess I was just a frustrated since I''m not there to monitor her eating habits.

 

[Kaleigh]

I''d ask her what she would like. I know a novel idea, and even if she tells you, it''s not guarantee she''ll eat what you pack. BUT if you let her be a part of it, she''s going to be more likely to eat it. Promise!!!

 

[D&T]

Date: 12/3/2009 10:06:17 PM
Author: Kaleigh
I''d ask her what she would like. I know a novel idea, and even if she tells you, it''s not guarantee she''ll eat what you pack. BUT if you let her be a part of it, she''s going to be more likely to eat it. Promise!!!

lol... she''ll say COOKIEs

but sooo true.. I need to listen more, I''m always in a rush to pack lunch and get everthing ready that I need her to be more apart of the "process" of packing her lunch. She picks her breakfast out and gobbles it all up every morning, gotta remember to do the same thing with lunch now. Thanks Kaleigh..

 

[KimberlyH]

I''d continue to pack her lunch and snacks, whatever doesn''t get eaten goes in the fridge for the next day (if safe, of course). If my kiddo said he/she was hungry at a time other than normal snack time their choice would be either a fruit or a vegetable (raisins, carrots, apple, cucumber, etc.), no other option; and if it seemed snacking was making mealtime a battle I would put a halt to snacking outside of school altogether. Also, If she''s only eating her fruits and veggies, perhaps packing two bags, one for lunch and one for snacks, and giving her those items that she''s good about eating at snack and putting the other stuff (protiens, etc.) in lunch so that she doesn''t have other choices. As a teacher I''d be happy to oblige your request to make sure your kiddo only brought her snack bag to snack and lunch bag to lunch.

 

[swingirl]

Try the school lunch. It's easier for kids to have the food plopped in front of them than to work their way through bags and containers. Plus other kids are eating the same thing.

And she won't starve. She just may not be that hungry or it'll take some time to get used to the new routine.

 

[Kaleigh]

Date: 12/3/2009 10:10:24 PM
Author: D&T

Date: 12/3/2009 10:06:17 PM
Author: Kaleigh
I''d ask her what she would like. I know a novel idea, and even if she tells you, it''s not guarantee she''ll eat what you pack. BUT if you let her be a part of it, she''s going to be more likely to eat it. Promise!!!

lol... she''ll say COOKIEs

but sooo true.. I need to listen more, I''m always in a rush to pack lunch and get everthing ready that I need her to be more apart of the ''process'' of packing her lunch. She picks her breakfast out and gobbles it all up every morning, gotta remember to do the same thing with lunch now. Thanks Kaleigh..

Hey no problem. My son was a toughie, so I said, look... This isn''t working, so tell me what you want, and gave him choices. I let him help me pack the first few lunches.. Once he picked the stuff and put it into baggies, he owned it.. I know it''s time consuming, but the more involved they are, you are allowing them to make choices for themselves... That''s the AHA moment I had...

Good luck!!!

 

[monarch64]

It sounds like she likes the fruits and veggies. I would just pack more of those for a week or so, cut down on the turkey/chicken portions and see what happens. If she misses them, she''ll say something, I bet.

 

[Maisie]

I worried myself sick when James started school in September. He is a very slow eater, used his fingers a lot and was very picky. We would always have to make him different meals as he would refuse to eat what we were having.

I spent the whole summer worrying what would happen when he got to school and would refuse to eat the school meals. As it turned out he eats everything they put in front of him and eats at a good speed - with a knife and fork! I was relieved and annoyed at the same time. He has been playing me for years!! Such a bad boy!

I am sure your little one will eat. MC is right, kids won''t let themselves starve. I think it takes time to learn that they have a set amount of time to eat. Its a good idea to put things in her lunch that don''t need a lot of chewing time.

 

[D&T]

Thank you! for all of your comments!!! I''ll try all of them

and see how she does the upcoming weeks.

 

[AGBF]

I gave up and when my daughter was in elementary school took the option of pre-paying so that she could have the hot lunch every day. The school cafeteria was well run and if she didn't like the lunch of the day she could always have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or a yogurt. (I think yogurt was the second choice. A peanut butter and jelly sandwich was available without fail. There was also always a second choice.) She could choose her milk: skim or whole or chocolate. There was a piece of fresh fruit. There was a nice meal.

I eventually found out Whitney was feeling forced to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich that another girl at the school brought for her every day. The girl had seen she had no lunch and thought she was anorectic and that I was neglecting her and decided to provide her with lunch. Whitney was afraid to refuse to eat it. She never could stand up to anyone except her immediate family!

I called the girl's mother (whom I knew). (The girl's father was a physician.) The mother was offended that I called. She seemed to think that my daughter might really have been in need of her daughter's intervention and that I should be heaping praise upon her daughter! I am sure I told her that her daughter had a kind heart, but I had to question why she (the mother) wouldn't have phoned me if she felt there was a problem with Whitney's eating rather than to have let her ten year-old daughter take on the management of my daughter's nutritional needs! I mentioned that I was a licensed clinical social worker in the state and that if any child neglect had been taking place, we should have been discussing it!

My daughter eats when she wants to eat. She couldn't gulp down entire meals in the five minutes that was left to her after standing in line for 25 minutes. She didn't like any food at all from home. So she ate (a lot) when she came home from school. She is 17 now. She still doesn't like school food.

AGBF

 

[choro72]

I was a slooooooooow eater. If I got hungry, I just ate more for dinner. Your child will be fine

 

[D&T]

Date: 12/4/2009 1:17:34 PM
Author: AGBF

I gave up and when my daughter was in elementary school took the option of pre-paying so that she could have the hot lunch every day. The school cafeteria was well run and if she didn''t like the lunch of the day she could always have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich or a yogurt. (I think yogurt was the second choice. A peanut butter and jelly sandwich was available without fail. There was also always a second choice.) She could choose her milk: skim or whole or chocolate. There was a piece of fresh fruit. There was a nice meal.

I eventually found out Whitney was feeling forced to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich that another girl at the school brought for her every day. The girl had seen she had no lunch and thought she was anorectic and that I was neglecting her and decided to provide her with lunch. Whitney was afraid to refuse to eat it. She never could stand up to anyone except her immediate family!

I called the girl''s mother (whom I knew). (The girl''s father was a physician.) The mother was offended that I called. She seemed to think that my daughter might really have been in need of her daughter''s intervention and that I should be heaping praise upon her daughter! I am sure I told her that her daughter had a kind heart, but I had to question why she (the mother) wouldn''t have phoned me if she felt there was a problem with Whitney''s eating rather than to have let her ten year-old daughter take on the management of my daughter''s nutritional needs! I mentioned that I was a licensed clinical social worker in the state and that if any child neglect had been taking place, we should have been discussing it!

My daughter eats when she wants to eat. She couldn''t gulp down entire meals in the five minutes that was left to her after standing in line for 25 minutes. She didn''t like any food at all from home. So she ate (a lot) when she came home from school. She is 17 now. She still doesn''t like school food.

AGBF

oh no,,, Yikes!! the little girl did have a kind heart...bless her heart...hmmm, hopefully other kids won''t think I"m starving my DD...lol but hopefully before it goes that far, her teachers will at least discuss with me first

Thank you for your comments everyone, it gives me a different perspective

 

[partgypsy]

With kids that age it seems the exception to completely finish lunch. They get snacks during their time and then less time than at home to finish their lunch which contributes to the problem. Also, it''s distracting eating with a bunch of other kids. As others have said, they are not going to starve. Often my hb will give our younger daughter the rest of her lunch or a snack when she gets home and will eat. Another thing is the presentation. For example our younger daughter won''t eat turkey sandwiches, but will eat slices of turkey rolled up and cut up pieces of cheese. If you cut the fruit into slices/pieces it is also easier/quicker to eat.

 

[D&T]

Date: 12/4/2009 10:53:24 PM
Author: part gypsy
With kids that age it seems the exception to completely finish lunch. They get snacks during their time and then less time than at home to finish their lunch which contributes to the problem. Also, it''s distracting eating with a bunch of other kids. As others have said, they are not going to starve. Often my hb will give our younger daughter the rest of her lunch or a snack when she gets home and will eat. Another thing is the presentation. For example our younger daughter won''t eat turkey sandwiches, but will eat slices of turkey rolled up and cut up pieces of cheese. If you cut the fruit into slices/pieces it is also easier/quicker to eat.

yay! I currently do this with her right now.... great tips everyone!