Mom''s 60th - present advice!

[Independent Gal]

So, my mom is turning 60 in January, and I want to bring her a present when I go visit her in November. For a while now, I've been thinking I'd get her the whiteflash 'Dreams of Africa' earrings because they have 6 ACA's (one for each decade, dontcha know!) and all the profits go to charities that help rehabilitate kids involved in conflicts in diamond mining countries in Africa. My mom lived in Zambia doing relief and development work and teaching for a long time, and these issues are close to her heart. But, my mom's not a major jewelry person. Her only valuable piece is her engagement ring, which she got for, I think, for her 24th anniversary. It's a honker (2.67) and she really enjoys it. I've asked her if she wants more fine jewelry and she said 'yes', but I don't know how serious that was. I mean, who says 'NO! No fine jewelry!' Know what I mean?

So now, I'm suddenly wondering whether I'm doing that thing people do where they project what THEY want onto their loved ones. You know, when a hubby comes home with the latest in big screen tv tech for his wife's birthday? What if I'm just projecting my ACA inspired drool onto her?

Should I get them for her?! What do you think?

 

[FireGoddess]

Well, you''re asking on a diamond forum, so take the replies through that filter...

I think it is a GREAT idea, for all the reasons you mentioned (she did say she wanted more fine jewelry, the 6 stones for 60 years, where the proceeds go - and be sure to tell her those last 2 things if you give them to her!)

I really like the whole idea.

 

[Independent Gal]

Haha! Good point FireGoddess. Of course you guys are going to be a bit biased.

 

[door knob solitaire]

Indie...what a special...thoughtful gift you came up with! You are such a good daughter!

I also thought of a chain with 6 diamonds or colored stones by the yard...the chain can also be added to...I hope you will have an opportunity to add 5 more decades!!

If you decide jewelry isn''t right...(oh dear forgive me for even thinking such a thing!!) You could donate, support...6 children...or some school house...or some education project in her name. She sounds as if she has a rich life filled with experiences of a giving a caring nature...material things/momentos may not be as important to her. I realize you want to make this milestone stand out from the rest. You are such a sweetie.

The more I learn about you...I fall more in love with you!!

DKS

 

[Independent Gal]

DKS, it's funny you should say that because for the last few years I've pretty much only been giving to charity to honour parental birthdays, etc. It IS what they like best! So giving her these earrings would be something that stood out as different.

I think part of my urge to buy her a nice jewel is that she would never spoil herself like that. While she is now quite well-off thanks to her and my step-dad's successes over the last 8 years or so, she grew up as poor as they come. Not enough food / clothes and shoes from charitable donations till she was 16 kind of poor. So it took her a loooooong time to actually buy things for herself! Particularly because we were not that well-off when I was growing up either.

So my step-dad found out almost by accident that she would love to have a diamond. She refused to admit it until he caught her delighted with her friend's new ring. The idea of spending money THAT frivolously is still not comfortable for her. They are very generous with their charitable giving and are set for retirement when the time comes, so... why not? But she still doesn't do it. Is it because she doesn't want jewlery or because she feels too guilty to do it? I just don't know.

So it's partly for that reason that I feel like spoiling her with a little jewelry, but feel nervous about doing it.

 

[poshpepper]

Date: 9/25/2007 4:57:52 PM
Author: Independent Gal
DKS, it''s funny you should say that because for the last few years I''ve pretty much only been giving to charity to honour parental birthdays, etc. It IS what they like best! So giving her these earrings would be something that stood out as different.

I think part of my urge to buy her a nice jewel is that she would never spoil herself like that. While she is now quite well-off thanks to her and my step-dad''s successes over the last 8 years or so, she grew up as poor as they come. Not enough food / clothes and shoes from charitable donations till she was 16 kind of poor. So it took her a loooooong time to actually buy things for herself! Particularly because we were not that well-off when I was growing up either.

So my step-dad found out almost by accident that she would love to have a diamond. She refused to admit it until he caught her delighted with her friend''s new ring. The idea of spending money THAT frivolously is still not comfortable for her. They are very generous with their charitable giving and are set for retirement when the time comes, so... why not? But she still doesn''t do it. Is it because she doesn''t want jewlery or because she feels too guilty to do it? I just don''t know.

So it''s partly for that reason that I feel like spoiling her with a little jewelry, but feel nervous about doing it.

I have always felt that the best gift you can give someone is something they wouldn''t or couldn''t buy themselves... and these earrings seem to fit that bill perfectly! I also think that the fact that the proceeds go to charity is also a big plus. It allows you to keep in the tradition of charity giving for birthdays but also mark this one as special with an added bonus of something she would never buy for herself (sounds like she still appreciates jewelery even though she doesn''t want to buy it herself). I say go for it!

 

[iheartscience]

Date: 9/25/2007 5:33:21 PM
Author: poshpepper

Date: 9/25/2007 4:57:52 PM

I have always felt that the best gift you can give someone is something they wouldn''t or couldn''t buy themselves... and these earrings seem to fit that bill perfectly! I also think that the fact that the proceeds go to charity is also a big plus. It allows you to keep in the tradition of charity giving for birthdays but also mark this one as special with an added bonus of something she would never buy for herself (sounds like she still appreciates jewelery even though she doesn''t want to buy it herself). I say go for it!

Ditto poshpepper-I think those earrings are a great compromise between something frivolous and something charitable. I hope you go for it!

 

[snlee]

Date: 9/25/2007 2:26:39 PM
Author: FireGoddess

I think it is a GREAT idea, for all the reasons you mentioned (she did say she wanted more fine jewelry, the 6 stones for 60 years, where the proceeds go - and be sure to tell her those last 2 things if you give them to her!)

I really like the whole idea.

Ditto!

 

[risingsun]

Thritto! I''m sure she''ll treasure them. How thoughtful

 

[crown1]

i''ll be the lone one to nix the earrings. i think that since she does not have a large amount of jewelry that she may more enjoy something she can see.

the etoile (sp) style band with the aca''s or the bangle with the aca''s would be my choice so she can enjoy the beauty of the piece. jmho. i think she will be happy that you remembered her whatever it turns out to be.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

I think they would be the perfect gift! I love all the symbolism around them.

 

[OUpearlgirl]

You are so thoughtful! What a wonderful gift!!

 

[monarch64]

I think it''s a fantastic idea, IG! I disagree that your mom won''t be able to see them all the time, every time she looks in the mirror she can admire them and the sparkle they add to her face. They''re great earrings and the symbolism is meaningful as well.