PrincessNatalie
Shiny_Rock
- Joined
- Apr 30, 2010
- Messages
- 382
Hello everyone!
This is my first topic in BWW unfortunately its an unhappy one.
My best friend got married in September last year.
I just got engaged on New Years.
Her wedding was very budget consious, she had a friend do her hair, did her own make up, got the dress from ebay, had a friend do the photography, had the wedding in a park, burrowed someones car for the wedding car, and had the reception at her husbands parents house, which actually has an amazing city/bay view and is at Bretts Wharf if there are any Brisbane-ites around.
We all had a wonderful time at her wedding, but her and the groom ended up taking photos for most of the cocktail reception, because the ceremony was at sunset.
But I on the other hand want a small but more traditional (non-religious ceremony though) wedding at one of the higher quality venues in the city.
I really expected her to be excited to help me plan my wedding (as I was for hers, I enjoyed every moment of it) but instead she keeps on trying to get me to consider cheaper options (eg "hire a hall"), complaining about people she doesnt like who are on my guestlist and complaining about how much she hated her wedding and saying she is is worried/intimidated about my wedding because she has doubts about her own.
Honestly I thought she loved her wedding until now, but all I have been hearing since I got engaged is how much she wishes she got a real photographer, hated her hair, the dress was her biggest disappointment, wishes she lost more weight, had the ceremony earlier, didnt have to set up the reception area in the morning etc. The biggest reason this is upsetting me is that everything at her wedding was *her idea*. And now she keeps on trying to suggest I take the cheaper options - which is fine - but then getting offended when I say "no thats just not me" or "no I have considered that but this is the reason why we decided against it" - I have barely had a chance to research at home as Davids parents are staying with us and she is already getting upset because I am not considering her ideas. Her ideas are budget consious, where as I am more quality consious. I want something beautiful not something cheap (sorry to be harsh).
I did not get involved in the ideas details of her wedding at all, I helped with all the leg work, the dress shopping (before they decided on the ebay gown), alterations, I did the flowers! and went shopping for reception things, did all the leg work, but left the ideas upto her - it WAS HER wedding afterall.
She has also had a go at her husband for not coming to me for ring advice, and has been making me feel bad about the size and quality of my ring. Both our bf's spent about the same, its just David got much better deals (I dont know all the exact details but I have sent him lots of info over the last year).
Sorry I obviously just really need to vent. But if I have to hear about how much she hated her wedding one more time I think I am going to cry.
Has anyone got any advice for dealing with insecure married friends? I am new to wedding planning and was expecting support and hapiness not bitterness and trying to get me to down grade my wedding to match hers. Which I loved by the way! That kinda makes it more infuriating.
This is my first topic in BWW unfortunately its an unhappy one.
My best friend got married in September last year.
I just got engaged on New Years.
Her wedding was very budget consious, she had a friend do her hair, did her own make up, got the dress from ebay, had a friend do the photography, had the wedding in a park, burrowed someones car for the wedding car, and had the reception at her husbands parents house, which actually has an amazing city/bay view and is at Bretts Wharf if there are any Brisbane-ites around.
We all had a wonderful time at her wedding, but her and the groom ended up taking photos for most of the cocktail reception, because the ceremony was at sunset.
But I on the other hand want a small but more traditional (non-religious ceremony though) wedding at one of the higher quality venues in the city.
I really expected her to be excited to help me plan my wedding (as I was for hers, I enjoyed every moment of it) but instead she keeps on trying to get me to consider cheaper options (eg "hire a hall"), complaining about people she doesnt like who are on my guestlist and complaining about how much she hated her wedding and saying she is is worried/intimidated about my wedding because she has doubts about her own.
Honestly I thought she loved her wedding until now, but all I have been hearing since I got engaged is how much she wishes she got a real photographer, hated her hair, the dress was her biggest disappointment, wishes she lost more weight, had the ceremony earlier, didnt have to set up the reception area in the morning etc. The biggest reason this is upsetting me is that everything at her wedding was *her idea*. And now she keeps on trying to suggest I take the cheaper options - which is fine - but then getting offended when I say "no thats just not me" or "no I have considered that but this is the reason why we decided against it" - I have barely had a chance to research at home as Davids parents are staying with us and she is already getting upset because I am not considering her ideas. Her ideas are budget consious, where as I am more quality consious. I want something beautiful not something cheap (sorry to be harsh).
I did not get involved in the ideas details of her wedding at all, I helped with all the leg work, the dress shopping (before they decided on the ebay gown), alterations, I did the flowers! and went shopping for reception things, did all the leg work, but left the ideas upto her - it WAS HER wedding afterall.
She has also had a go at her husband for not coming to me for ring advice, and has been making me feel bad about the size and quality of my ring. Both our bf's spent about the same, its just David got much better deals (I dont know all the exact details but I have sent him lots of info over the last year).
Sorry I obviously just really need to vent. But if I have to hear about how much she hated her wedding one more time I think I am going to cry.
Has anyone got any advice for dealing with insecure married friends? I am new to wedding planning and was expecting support and hapiness not bitterness and trying to get me to down grade my wedding to match hers. Which I loved by the way! That kinda makes it more infuriating.