I wish I knew why I wasn''t good enough.

[MonkeyPie]

Some of you might recall I applied for a job within my company recently. I had the interview last Thursday, and today I got an email being told someone else was chosen.

I happen to know the only other people that applied are nowhere near as experienced as me. I just don''t understand why this company keeps shooting me down every time I apply. I have to be doing something wrong in the interviews, and I can''t figure out what it is!

I''m so depressed.

 

[Lorelei]

Oh Monkey...sending you a big hug, I know how hard it is, but something great will come along for you!! Hang in there!

YOU ARE GOOD ENOUGH.

 

[fieryred33143]

I'm sorry

Is it *possible* that maybe your boss isn't giving you a good referral because she/he wants to keep you there?? There are lots of cases where bosses don't want to let go of good people so they give a crappy referral.

 

[robbie3982]

Awe, I''m sorry you didnt'' get the job. Have you tried asking the interviewer for feedback? Maybe just send an email in response to the one you got saying something along the lines of "Thank you for keeping me informed. I''m hoping that you can help me out and give me some feedback on what I can improve on before my next interview."

 

[D2B]

Well, it is so hard to say what went wrong. It is a hard and awful thing to go through, so my biggest hugs.

Hmmm, things to possibly look at, brush up on interview skills have a look on the internet/books. the other thing is that sometimes a person is just not a fit for the culture of the company, and no matter what it isnt going to happen. My best friend had that happen in X company, she just didnt seem to be able to get on or fit in with the culture, she went for a lower paid job in a different company and is now moving on and up, for whatever inexplicable reason, the company and her are a fit, if that makes sense.

At the end, remember, it is not personal, and you have the skillls so good luck and keep trying.
Oh, can you get feedback from the interview pannel??
good luck
d2b

 

[Elegant]

I''m sorry to hear about that - I am sure it is disappointing. I know first hand.

I am a teacher with an admin credential and I kept applying for admin jobs and trying to move up in my district, but never making it. There was a leadership program I tried to get into and I didn''t make it, so I asked for feedback. They asked me, have you done a, b, and c? My answer was yes I have - I don''t think there was a legitimate reason why I didn''t get in.

You know over the past couple of years I have slowly learned that sometimes things really do happen for a reason. Maybe you got past over for this job and maybe something else that is better or more fitting for you is right around the corner? Maybe it wouldn''t have worked out for some strange reason, etc. You never really know.

I can totally hear where you are coming from and have been depressed and down on myself for so long. Apparently they had someone else in mind...and it is apparent because you said you have more experience than the others do. So you really have to wonder what is really going on - it isn''t you, in my opinion, it is something else behind the scenes that you know nothing about...yet...things always come forward.

Maybe it is time that you look outside for another job in another company that will appreciate you for who you are and appreciate someone with your experience. I sat back for 6 years waiting for my principal to acknowledge my effort and my leadership and he never has. It is time that I leave and work somewhere else.

You are good enough - and as hard as it is for me to say it, things sometimes do happen for a reason...

So, keep your chin up and be proud of what you do everyday and who you are and maybe look elsewhere for people who will acknowledge your experience as an asset to their company.

Just my opinion...

 

[decodelighted]

Blerg. This reminds me of my entire twenties! Darn you, Vogue

Magazine!

Sometimes (many times) you have to switch companies to be seen in a new light. And to make significantly more money. Its a weird fact of life that I wish someone had told me in college.

Really recommend looking *outside* of your current company. Immediately. If you''ve been passed over many times I don''t think there''s much you *can* do to change things.

 

[smitcompton]

Dear Monkey Pie,

So sorry you didn''t get the job. While it is a difficult thing to do, I''d definitely ask the interviewer if she would explain why you didn''t get the job and where you could improve. Sometimes they don''t tell you the truth anyway, but you might get some feedback that will help. There are times when we don''t know what mannerisms we have they could turn people off. I talk with my hands and I had to go to court and the lawyer found that habit to be really irritating, he had me practice clasping my hands together in my lap. He told me it was so distracting, people wouldn''t listen to me, they would just watch my hands. LOL
Thanks for helping on another post about saving up to buy a better stone. I''m glad you understood. Of course, I think you''re smart.!
Thanks,
Annette

 

[littlelysser]

I''m sorry to hear that.

I went through something similar a few months back...and well, it is awfully hard on the ego. Particularly when the folks that got the position are less qualified or experienced than you are.

When I went through it, I got several good suggestions...the first being to talk to the folks that made the decision and find out why. You could also do some and tape some mock interviews...watch yourself and maybe you''ll see where you went wrong. It could also be that the hiring boss just had a better connection with them. It could also be that your company stinks!

I also did a lot of soul searching and realized the reason I was getting passed over was because my heart really wasn''t in it...and I think it showed in my interviews. I''m currently a quasi-jewelry designer and god knows what else...

Regardless, I''m sorry and it stinks.

 

[SarahLovesJS]

I am sorry.

Believe me, I know how you feel. My father recently got passed up for a promotion he''s worked 20 years for because the old boss picked the new one . . . and he picked his friend from another place. It''s a long story, but it depressed me so much. He''s been such a workaholic in the past and it was all for nothing it seems.

Anyway enough of my sob story, I am sorry..and it is NOT you. It is the company. Please don''t be down on yourself!

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 7/17/2008 4:42:28 PM
Author: decodelighted
Blerg. This reminds me of my entire twenties! Darn you, Vogue

Magazine!

Sometimes (many times) you have to switch companies to be seen in a new light. And to make significantly more money. Its a weird fact of life that I wish someone had told me in college.

Really recommend looking *outside* of your current company. Immediately. If you''ve been passed over many times I don''t think there''s much you *can* do to change things.

This is so true. I have known people who weren''t given a chance and then moved to a completely different company and then they moved on to big and better things. I think you should apply somewhere else.

 

[Rock Candy]

Date: 7/17/2008 6:51:36 PM
Author: Skippy123

Date: 7/17/2008 4:42:28 PM

Author: decodelighted

Blerg. This reminds me of my entire twenties! Darn you, Vogue

Magazine!


Sometimes (many times) you have to switch companies to be seen in a new light. And to make significantly more money. Its a weird fact of life that I wish someone had told me in college.


Really recommend looking *outside* of your current company. Immediately. If you''ve been passed over many times I don''t think there''s much you *can* do to change things.

This is so true. I have known people who weren''t given a chance and then moved to a completely different company and then they moved on to big and better things. I think you should apply somewhere else.

I agree with this. Look at it this way - it''s their loss!

 

[purrfectpear]

When you said you''d been passed over twice before, I was afraid this would be the same result. I''m so sorry for your disappointment.

I have to respectfully disagree that it''s not personal. I suspect it IS personal. Someone at the company has either bad mouthed or blackballed you, or else it''s just a very, very, unusual corporation

If moving into the next step is important to your happiness, I think it''s time to brush up the resume, check if any further education is needed, and quietly plan your exit on YOUR terms. A fresh start may be just the thing so you can stretch your wings and fly

I agree with trying to get more feedback from them but in today''s corporate climate they are typically very tight mouthed.

 

[allycat0303]

MonkeyPie,

I am really sorry to hear this. I think right now, the best thing to do is have a little wine, and maybe a little comfort food You need to believe in what you are worth, even if your company does not appreciate you. Try and keep the outlook that perhaps the timing for this job wasn''t right, or that a better opportunity is waiting for you.

Hugs!

 

[Linda W]

Date: 7/17/2008 6:51:36 PM
Author: Skippy123

Date: 7/17/2008 4:42:28 PM

Author: decodelighted

Blerg. This reminds me of my entire twenties! Darn you, Vogue

Magazine!


Sometimes (many times) you have to switch companies to be seen in a new light. And to make significantly more money. Its a weird fact of life that I wish someone had told me in college.


Really recommend looking *outside* of your current company. Immediately. If you''ve been passed over many times I don''t think there''s much you *can* do to change things.

This is so true. I have known people who weren''t given a chance and then moved to a completely different company and then they moved on to big and better things. I think you should apply somewhere else.

DOUBLE DITTO!!!!!

 

[LostSapphire]

Date: 7/17/2008 4:16:51 PM
Author: robbie3982
Awe, I'm sorry you didnt' get the job. Have you tried asking the interviewer for feedback? Maybe just send an email in response to the one you got saying something along the lines of 'Thank you for keeping me informed. I'm hoping that you can help me out and give me some feedback on what I can improve on before my next interview.'

MonkeyPie:

I am sorry that you were not selected for the position.

May I "ditto" what robbie3982 suggested?

I hire people for a living, and I think in the past 3 years only ONE person has ever contacted me for feedback.

Based on our discussion (which went really well, by the way) I kept him in the back of my head, and the next opening that I felt was more suitable came up, I hired him without considering alternative candidates.

It is an extremely positive experience for an interviewer to be asked for feedback! You would be amazed at how many people don't even follow up with an e-mail to thank me for the interview. Sometimes something as simple as that or the feedback call will tip me into their direction.

And, you never know: the deal they make with the successful candidate may fall through....if you keep in touch, you have a very good chance.

Best of luck.

LS

ETA: I know it's hard to do right now, but if you psych yourself up prior to going into an interview, it makes a big difference: decide that you are going to CONVINCE the interviewer that YOU are the person they NEED. Sell Sell Sell! and a big smile.

 

[MonkeyPie]

Thanks for the comfort words, everybody. I really needed it.

I did send an email to the man I interviewed with thanking him for the interview after I recieved the (extremely impersonal) email that I was not chosen. He did say it was a tough decision, and that he hopes we keep in touch. I replied asking for feedback, asking what it was that I was lacking so I would know for the future. He didn''t answer by the time I came home, so I am hoping he will tomorrow.

It''s really upsetting to be turned down for jobs in two different departments for three different positions, and never with a proper answer as to WHY. I agree with you purrfectpear - I think it may actually be my boss who is badmouthing me. He wrote me up four weeks ago claiming my QC was terrible and had been for months, and I have to wonder why it took him so many months to finally mention it to me. I had no way of knowing otherwise, so how could I fix it? Since he wrote me up I have been at 95% and over in my QC, but he has been hovering and letting me know the smallest slipup means I''m fired. Thankfully, he is moving to New Hampshire on the 25th, and I won''t miss him even a little bit. That man has made me cry so many times I have lost count.

I no longer like my job, even though I used to love it. I have been trying SO hard to get out of there but just can''t seem to break free because no one will even consider me. Looking outside the company doesn''t seem to be getting me anywhere, either - what I do is sort of specialized and it doesn''t transfer over into something different elsewhere, unless I want to be a receptionist or in a call center, both which I loathe. It doesn''t help that I REALLY want to pay off bills, and I can''t get anywhere with that unless both my husband and I are making decent money...so I have to keep this stupid job until something better comes along, and I have been looking for over a year now.

Oh, well. I had some fried potatoes and chocolate and I am not so weepy now. Thanks for your kind words, all.