cellososweet
Brilliant_Rock
- Joined
- Feb 12, 2006
- Messages
- 876
. . . But i can''t help it
FI proposed to me back in February. The ring is gorgeous. It is exactly the one i wanted. It looks perfect on my finger. everyone and anyone compliments me on it. we picked a date for next august at a private home. it is beautiful. outdoors. beautiful gardens and acreage of nothing but manicured tree groves, gardens, etc. we''ve picked our colors, wedding party, etc. i''m really really really excited about the wedding. but. .
i''m still not over the proposal. I know! It''s so dumb. But let me give some background. . . .
We had been talking marriage and I knew the proposal was coming. He wasn''t very good at hiding the fact that he was going to get the ring. he said he had to "run errands." We''re a super-open couple, so the word "errands" have never even come out of his mouth. I knew what he was doing. We went to my parents house to hang out and he dressed up. duh. i knew it immediately. he always dresses well, but he was like. . button down shirt on a saturday. and he talked to my parents way more than usual and it was so obvious. but that''s not the problem really. When we talked about the proposal i told him that i didn''t expect anything overthetop. didn''t expect all the candles and champagne and stuff. it would be nice but not necessary. the only thing i asked. . .the ONLY thing. . . was that it be a private affair and not in public. I was sooo adamant about this. . . .
i hate surprises and i know hate is a strong word but it''s perfect for my feeling on surprises. And i realllllly really hate public surprises. i''m an outgoing person, very social, but im traditional in that some things need to be done in private. i figuratively smashed this into his head. he said that he knew that i hated it.
So. . we go to dinner with my parents and he gets down on one knee in front of them and the whole restaurant. i was embarrased, angry, and put on the spot. i would have said yes if we were in a private place anyway, but i felt that i had to say yes because "the whole world" was watching. This wasn''t the feeling i wanted to have on my engagement day.
i''ve told him that i was upset about the proposal (after about a month) and asked him why he would go against my only wish. He said that he got so caught up in the moment and just couldn''t wait. i know that''s sweet and all, but i feel like he completely disregarded my feelings and I CANNOT get over it.
What the heck do i do? seriously. . .i can''t stop thinking about it and feeling like i said yes because i was put on the spot, not because i wanted to. but i did want to. does this make sense? i wanted to say yes because i wanted to say yes, not because i was embarassed. please help me. arggggh. gosh. . . i dont'' even know what i could do or he could do to make this feeling go away. i seriously think a major re-do is the only way to go. but how is this possible? The ring is already on my finger. i''m an idiot. haha. i know if i read this i''d be like. . .shut up poo poo, things aren''t always perfect. but. . . yeah. . advice please?
~cellososweet
FI proposed to me back in February. The ring is gorgeous. It is exactly the one i wanted. It looks perfect on my finger. everyone and anyone compliments me on it. we picked a date for next august at a private home. it is beautiful. outdoors. beautiful gardens and acreage of nothing but manicured tree groves, gardens, etc. we''ve picked our colors, wedding party, etc. i''m really really really excited about the wedding. but. .
i''m still not over the proposal. I know! It''s so dumb. But let me give some background. . . .
We had been talking marriage and I knew the proposal was coming. He wasn''t very good at hiding the fact that he was going to get the ring. he said he had to "run errands." We''re a super-open couple, so the word "errands" have never even come out of his mouth. I knew what he was doing. We went to my parents house to hang out and he dressed up. duh. i knew it immediately. he always dresses well, but he was like. . button down shirt on a saturday. and he talked to my parents way more than usual and it was so obvious. but that''s not the problem really. When we talked about the proposal i told him that i didn''t expect anything overthetop. didn''t expect all the candles and champagne and stuff. it would be nice but not necessary. the only thing i asked. . .the ONLY thing. . . was that it be a private affair and not in public. I was sooo adamant about this. . . .
i hate surprises and i know hate is a strong word but it''s perfect for my feeling on surprises. And i realllllly really hate public surprises. i''m an outgoing person, very social, but im traditional in that some things need to be done in private. i figuratively smashed this into his head. he said that he knew that i hated it.
So. . we go to dinner with my parents and he gets down on one knee in front of them and the whole restaurant. i was embarrased, angry, and put on the spot. i would have said yes if we were in a private place anyway, but i felt that i had to say yes because "the whole world" was watching. This wasn''t the feeling i wanted to have on my engagement day.
i''ve told him that i was upset about the proposal (after about a month) and asked him why he would go against my only wish. He said that he got so caught up in the moment and just couldn''t wait. i know that''s sweet and all, but i feel like he completely disregarded my feelings and I CANNOT get over it.
What the heck do i do? seriously. . .i can''t stop thinking about it and feeling like i said yes because i was put on the spot, not because i wanted to. but i did want to. does this make sense? i wanted to say yes because i wanted to say yes, not because i was embarassed. please help me. arggggh. gosh. . . i dont'' even know what i could do or he could do to make this feeling go away. i seriously think a major re-do is the only way to go. but how is this possible? The ring is already on my finger. i''m an idiot. haha. i know if i read this i''d be like. . .shut up poo poo, things aren''t always perfect. but. . . yeah. . advice please?
~cellososweet