innerkitten
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Aug 1, 2003
- Messages
- 5,623
I'm really into genealogy and family history and have been researching my family tree on and off for a few years. A little over a month ago I contacted a fellow researcher through a popular ancestry site because she was researching some of the same surnames. Long story short I mentioned it to my mother. The next day she came over and said" sit down I have something to tell you", and "the woman you've been exchanging emails with is your sister".
I guess when my mother was younger and living with her boyfriend ( a man she has never told me about ever but was with for possibly four years !) she found out she was pregnant. Now I don't know exactly all the details of the relationship she had with her ex. But she said that he pressured her a lot. She didn't want to marry him or have a child with him. So she decided as soon as she found out she was pregnant that she wouldn't tell anyone ( he knew of course), not even her family about the pregnancy, and that she would give the baby up for adoption. This was nine years before I was born.
So thats the long story short. I think my new sister is pretty cool and want a friendship with her. But my mom doesn't really want a relationship with her. In fact my mother told me not to tell anyone. Not even her husband or my father! She doesn't seem to want to think about that chapter of her life, and she said the adoption records were sealed for a reason, because she didn't want contact in the future.
This has happened to my husband twice! I guess after his mother and father split up his dad really got around. So when I told him he said " don't worry this kind of thing happens to me all the time".
I forgot to mention. My half sibling knew it was me when I contacted her, but she was respecting my mothers wishes by not saying anything to me. She had contacted my mother a few years earlier and they had exchanged a few emails.
I guess when my mother was younger and living with her boyfriend ( a man she has never told me about ever but was with for possibly four years !) she found out she was pregnant. Now I don't know exactly all the details of the relationship she had with her ex. But she said that he pressured her a lot. She didn't want to marry him or have a child with him. So she decided as soon as she found out she was pregnant that she wouldn't tell anyone ( he knew of course), not even her family about the pregnancy, and that she would give the baby up for adoption. This was nine years before I was born.
So thats the long story short. I think my new sister is pretty cool and want a friendship with her. But my mom doesn't really want a relationship with her. In fact my mother told me not to tell anyone. Not even her husband or my father! She doesn't seem to want to think about that chapter of her life, and she said the adoption records were sealed for a reason, because she didn't want contact in the future.
This has happened to my husband twice! I guess after his mother and father split up his dad really got around. So when I told him he said " don't worry this kind of thing happens to me all the time".
I forgot to mention. My half sibling knew it was me when I contacted her, but she was respecting my mothers wishes by not saying anything to me. She had contacted my mother a few years earlier and they had exchanged a few emails.