How many people have you had sex with?

[DNB]

It's personal, but I bet those with higher numbers think it's more personal than those with much lower ones.

I'm proud to say my DH is my one and only. And before anyone asks, I was not my DH's one and only (he's 3 yeas older than I am), but he still tells me he wishes I had been. Love that man.

 

[CJ2008]

This is something that I consider to be incredibly personal and not appropriate for discussion on a public forum (anonymous or not). No vote for me and no comment

I kind of agree with you (to the extent that I wouldn't, and won't, vote).

And I had that similar thought/reaction when I first saw the poll...

But then I realized it's only inappropriate to the extent of what people are willing to answer or not for themselves...I was surprised to see people are willing to be so open with something so intimate, but I tend to be super private with everything! (and yes, maybe a bit paranoid on the Internet)...so this just makes me realize how more relaxed people are in general than I am.

I'm just glad to see so far people have no regrets.

 

[momhappy]

It's personal, but I bet those with higher numbers think it's more personal than those with much lower ones.

I'm proud to say my DH is my one and only. And before anyone asks, I was not my DH's one and only (he's 3 yeas older than I am), but he still tells me he wishes I had been. Love that man.

I guess that I don't understand the logic here? Why would it be any more personal for those who's number is higher? It's the subject matter that makes it personal, not the details. Whether or not someone has slept with 1 person or 100, I don't think that it's anyone's business. If others are comfortable answering, that's perfectly fine I don't ask my own husband how many people he's slept with (and vice versa), so why would I discuss it on a public forum? I realize that it's just a fun poll, and there's no harm done - I just don't care to discuss certain things.

 

[nkarma]

It's personal, but I bet those with higher numbers think it's more personal than those with much lower ones.

I'm proud to say my DH is my one and only. And before anyone asks, I was not my DH's one and only (he's 3 yeas older than I am), but he still tells me he wishes I had been. Love that man.

I guess that I don't understand the logic here? Why would it be any more personal for those who's number is higher? It's the subject matter that makes it personal, not the details. Whether or not someone has slept with 1 person or 100, I don't think that it's anyone's business. If others are comfortable answering, that's perfectly fine I don't ask my own husband how many people he's slept with (and vice versa), so why would I discuss it on a public forum? I realize that it's just a fun poll, and there's no harm done - I just don't care to discuss certain things.

I think there is sometimes a reason why spouses/partners do no talk numbers because it would be hard to hear.

I was thinking the same thing about people's numbers as momhoppy, that I am not sure that the quantity matters for reporting. It's just sex...most all adult have sex on a regular basis...it's how we got here. I am assuming most people are happy their sexual decisions.

 

[vintagelover229]

I wish my husband was my one and only. However that is not the case and I was young with very low self esteem and self worth and thought the only thing of value that I had to give was sex at one point in my life. If I could go back and redo it I wouldn't have slept with any of them. I will say though that due to sexual trauma and rape in both my childhood and young adult life contributed to that low self worth and affected many of the poor sexual decisions that I made thought out my life. Thankfully the Lord restores all things and none of the poor decisions I made had any life long (physical) consequences-which easily could have happened. I am still dealing the the trauma that occurred in my life and am actually gearing up for some serious therapy here in the near future that will hopefully lay to rest the emotional and spiritual repercussions of both my actions and the traumas that happened in my childhood.

 

[momhappy]

It's personal, but I bet those with higher numbers think it's more personal than those with much lower ones.

I'm proud to say my DH is my one and only. And before anyone asks, I was not my DH's one and only (he's 3 yeas older than I am), but he still tells me he wishes I had been. Love that man.

I guess that I don't understand the logic here? Why would it be any more personal for those who's number is higher? It's the subject matter that makes it personal, not the details. Whether or not someone has slept with 1 person or 100, I don't think that it's anyone's business. If others are comfortable answering, that's perfectly fine I don't ask my own husband how many people he's slept with (and vice versa), so why would I discuss it on a public forum? I realize that it's just a fun poll, and there's no harm done - I just don't care to discuss certain things.

I think there is sometimes a reason why spouses/partners do no talk numbers because it would be hard to hear.

I was thinking the same thing about people's numbers as momhoppy, that I am not sure that the quantity matters for reporting. It's just sex...most all adult have sex on a regular basis...it's how we got here. I am assuming most people are happy their sexual decisions.

For us, the reason we don't discuss it is because we simply believe that not everything has to be shared between married people. I have no interest in knowing who/what/when/where when it comes to my husband's sexual history (and vice versa). I have asked him general questions like, "have you ever paid for sex?" but nothing beyond that. The same holds true for bathroom habits - we don't discuss that ever, ever, ever….
I suppose that perhaps some people might be uncomfortable with larger numbers of sexual partners (which could imply promiscuity) and some people might be uncomfortable with smaller numbers of sexual partners (which could imply being a prude). Sometimes, it has nothing at all to do with those things and some people just find certain topics private and/or personal. Again, (for me) it's the subject matter and not necessarily the details.
Anyway, it's an interesting topic and if folks are comfortable answering, then it's all good

 

[Dee*Jay]

I wonder how many ppl that voted over 2 had it with more that one person at the same time????

another poll, kenny?

Not me.
I only do one poll at a time.

OMG Kenny -- you seriously made me snort coffee!

I started making a list one time and about half way through I thought, No good can come of this! and I threw it out!

 

[Laila619]

Well I don't mind sharing my number: it's 2.

And I wish it had only been my DH, but alas 2 it is.

 

[missy]

It's personal, but I bet those with higher numbers think it's more personal than those with much lower ones.

I'm proud to say my DH is my one and only. And before anyone asks, I was not my DH's one and only (he's 3 yeas older than I am), but he still tells me he wishes I had been. Love that man.

I guess that I don't understand the logic here? Why would it be any more personal for those who's number is higher? It's the subject matter that makes it personal, not the details. Whether or not someone has slept with 1 person or 100, I don't think that it's anyone's business. If others are comfortable answering, that's perfectly fine I don't ask my own husband how many people he's slept with (and vice versa), so why would I discuss it on a public forum? I realize that it's just a fun poll, and there's no harm done - I just don't care to discuss certain things.

I think there is sometimes a reason why spouses/partners do no talk numbers because it would be hard to hear.

I was thinking the same thing about people's numbers as momhoppy, that I am not sure that the quantity matters for reporting. It's just sex...most all adult have sex on a regular basis...it's how we got here. I am assuming most people are happy their sexual decisions.

For us, the reason we don't discuss it is because we simply believe that not everything has to be shared between married people. I have no interest in knowing who/what/when/where when it comes to my husband's sexual history (and vice versa). I have asked him general questions like, "have you ever paid for sex?" but nothing beyond that. The same holds true for bathroom habits - we don't discuss that ever, ever, ever….
I suppose that perhaps some people might be uncomfortable with larger numbers of sexual partners (which could imply promiscuity) and some people might be uncomfortable with smaller numbers of sexual partners (which could imply being a prude). Sometimes, it has nothing at all to do with those things and some people just find certain topics private and/or personal. Again, (for me) it's the subject matter and not necessarily the details.
Anyway, it's an interesting topic and if folks are comfortable answering, then it's all good

Well, I find this interesting. You don't like personal questions that involve bathroom habits and how many people your dh has slept with (fwiw I never asked my dh how many women he has slept with either and vice versa) but you asked him if he ever paid for sex. I am not judging at all. I just find it interesting that you asked this question and not some others. I never asked my dh about this either but I am 100% sure the answer would be no. There are some questions one doesn't have to ask because they already know the answer and then there are the questions one doesn't ask because they don't want to know.


I think past history means very little. It's the here and now that is most important and as long as we are each other's one and only now and forever that's all that really matters. I wasn't my dh's first just as he wasn't my first but we are each other's final and forever true love.

 

[Dancing Fire]

I didn't vote, but guess I'm one of the 2 virgins here...

 

[TooPatient]

It's personal, but I bet those with higher numbers think it's more personal than those with much lower ones.

I'm proud to say my DH is my one and only. And before anyone asks, I was not my DH's one and only (he's 3 yeas older than I am), but he still tells me he wishes I had been. Love that man.

I guess that I don't understand the logic here? Why would it be any more personal for those who's number is higher? It's the subject matter that makes it personal, not the details. Whether or not someone has slept with 1 person or 100, I don't think that it's anyone's business. If others are comfortable answering, that's perfectly fine I don't ask my own husband how many people he's slept with (and vice versa), so why would I discuss it on a public forum? I realize that it's just a fun poll, and there's no harm done - I just don't care to discuss certain things.

I think there is sometimes a reason why spouses/partners do no talk numbers because it would be hard to hear.

I was thinking the same thing about people's numbers as momhoppy, that I am not sure that the quantity matters for reporting. It's just sex...most all adult have sex on a regular basis...it's how we got here. I am assuming most people are happy their sexual decisions.

And you can never forget it once you've been told

I wasn't told any specific numbers... just what one woman thought of him in bed (as in a detailed critique...) and how interested (or not) another was by the whole thing.

FWIW, I did NOT ask. I actually tried to hint that I did NOT want to know such things! I've since learned that hinting doesn't work with DH... Wish I'd known that sooner!

 

[Dancing Fire]

I wonder how many ppl that voted over 2 had it with more that one person at the same time????

another poll, kenny?

Not me.
I only do one poll at a time.

OMG Kenny -- you seriously made me snort coffee!

I started making a list one time and about half way through I thought, No good can come of this! and I threw it out!

DJ...You can use a calculator...

 

[purplesparklies]

I don't see polls in Tapatalk so I can't vote in the poll. However, I married my high school sweetheart and he has been my one and only. I was blessed to find my soul mate when I was only 15 and we have continued to grow together rather than grow apart in the 23 years since.

 

[Laila619]

DH and I both asked each other how many partners the other had had. For me, I wouldn't marry someone without having that discussion. Having discussions about past relationships can give you a lot of insight about a person. It's funny to read how everyone's different with regards to talking about that topic!

 

[Dancing Fire]

Kenny, you must start a sex related poll everyday!...

 

[momhappy]

It's personal, but I bet those with higher numbers think it's more personal than those with much lower ones.

I'm proud to say my DH is my one and only. And before anyone asks, I was not my DH's one and only (he's 3 yeas older than I am), but he still tells me he wishes I had been. Love that man.

I guess that I don't understand the logic here? Why would it be any more personal for those who's number is higher? It's the subject matter that makes it personal, not the details. Whether or not someone has slept with 1 person or 100, I don't think that it's anyone's business. If others are comfortable answering, that's perfectly fine I don't ask my own husband how many people he's slept with (and vice versa), so why would I discuss it on a public forum? I realize that it's just a fun poll, and there's no harm done - I just don't care to discuss certain things.

I think there is sometimes a reason why spouses/partners do no talk numbers because it would be hard to hear.

I was thinking the same thing about people's numbers as momhoppy, that I am not sure that the quantity matters for reporting. It's just sex...most all adult have sex on a regular basis...it's how we got here. I am assuming most people are happy their sexual decisions.

For us, the reason we don't discuss it is because we simply believe that not everything has to be shared between married people. I have no interest in knowing who/what/when/where when it comes to my husband's sexual history (and vice versa). I have asked him general questions like, "have you ever paid for sex?" but nothing beyond that. The same holds true for bathroom habits - we don't discuss that ever, ever, ever….
I suppose that perhaps some people might be uncomfortable with larger numbers of sexual partners (which could imply promiscuity) and some people might be uncomfortable with smaller numbers of sexual partners (which could imply being a prude). Sometimes, it has nothing at all to do with those things and some people just find certain topics private and/or personal. Again, (for me) it's the subject matter and not necessarily the details.
Anyway, it's an interesting topic and if folks are comfortable answering, then it's all good

Well, I find this interesting. You don't like personal questions that involve bathroom habits and how many people your dh has slept with (fwiw I never asked my dh how many women he has slept with either and vice versa) but you asked him if he ever paid for sex. I am not judging at all. I just find it interesting that you asked this question and not some others. I never asked my dh about this either but I am 100% sure the answer would be no. There are some questions one doesn't have to ask because they already know the answer and then there are the questions one doesn't ask because they don't want to know.


I think past history means very little. It's the here and now that is most important and as long as we are each other's one and only now and forever that's all that really matters. I wasn't my dh's first just as he wasn't my first but we are each other's final and forever true love.

Not sure what makes it so interesting, but to each their own. My point was that I don't care to go into the details of my husband's sexual history, but somewhere along the line, we discussed STD/AIDS testing and we've also talked briefly about paying for sex. The topic actually came up because someone in my husband's family paid for sex (and it went on for years). I don't know that it would be something that I would have asked him if it hadn't been brought up in a particular context. Thankfully, my husband has not because I don't find it the least bit attractive to pay for sex.

 

[Nyc2chigal]

My DH, and that's all.

 

[monarch64]

I have great memories, no regrets, and imagine I will enjoy regaling my nursing home clique with stories of my past. That is, if I remember them by then.

 

[missy]

It's personal, but I bet those with higher numbers think it's more personal than those with much lower ones.

I'm proud to say my DH is my one and only. And before anyone asks, I was not my DH's one and only (he's 3 yeas older than I am), but he still tells me he wishes I had been. Love that man.

I guess that I don't understand the logic here? Why would it be any more personal for those who's number is higher? It's the subject matter that makes it personal, not the details. Whether or not someone has slept with 1 person or 100, I don't think that it's anyone's business. If others are comfortable answering, that's perfectly fine I don't ask my own husband how many people he's slept with (and vice versa), so why would I discuss it on a public forum? I realize that it's just a fun poll, and there's no harm done - I just don't care to discuss certain things.

I think there is sometimes a reason why spouses/partners do no talk numbers because it would be hard to hear.

I was thinking the same thing about people's numbers as momhoppy, that I am not sure that the quantity matters for reporting. It's just sex...most all adult have sex on a regular basis...it's how we got here. I am assuming most people are happy their sexual decisions.

For us, the reason we don't discuss it is because we simply believe that not everything has to be shared between married people. I have no interest in knowing who/what/when/where when it comes to my husband's sexual history (and vice versa). I have asked him general questions like, "have you ever paid for sex?" but nothing beyond that. The same holds true for bathroom habits - we don't discuss that ever, ever, ever….
I suppose that perhaps some people might be uncomfortable with larger numbers of sexual partners (which could imply promiscuity) and some people might be uncomfortable with smaller numbers of sexual partners (which could imply being a prude). Sometimes, it has nothing at all to do with those things and some people just find certain topics private and/or personal. Again, (for me) it's the subject matter and not necessarily the details.
Anyway, it's an interesting topic and if folks are comfortable answering, then it's all good

Well, I find this interesting. You don't like personal questions that involve bathroom habits and how many people your dh has slept with (fwiw I never asked my dh how many women he has slept with either and vice versa) but you asked him if he ever paid for sex. I am not judging at all. I just find it interesting that you asked this question and not some others. I never asked my dh about this either but I am 100% sure the answer would be no. There are some questions one doesn't have to ask because they already know the answer and then there are the questions one doesn't ask because they don't want to know.


I think past history means very little. It's the here and now that is most important and as long as we are each other's one and only now and forever that's all that really matters. I wasn't my dh's first just as he wasn't my first but we are each other's final and forever true love.

Not sure what makes it so interesting, but to each their own. My point was that I don't care to go into the details of my husband's sexual history, but somewhere along the line, we discussed STD/AIDS testing and we've also talked briefly about paying for sex. The topic actually came up because someone in my husband's family paid for sex (and it went on for years). I don't know that it would be something that I would have asked him if it hadn't been brought up in a particular context. Thankfully, my husband has not because I don't find it the least bit attractive to pay for sex.

Thanks for the clarification. The fact that it came up because of a particular context makes sense. I just asked my dh how he feels about the discussion about # of sexual partners and lol he responded just as I thought. He sees no good that would come of that discussion and no reason for it. We've been together in a monogamous relationship for 15 years and never once did we even broach this subject (till now haha).

DH and I both asked each other how many partners the other had had. For me, I wouldn't marry someone without having that discussion. Having discussions about past relationships can give you a lot of insight about a person. It's funny to read how everyone's different with regards to talking about that topic!

I guess for us we didn't feel the need to because we are both pretty conservative with relationships and always took things slowly in each relationship. Neither of us was the type to jump into sexual relationships. So I can guess he didn't have meaningless or numerous sexual relationships and he knows I didn't either. But I can see where that could be a valuable topic to discuss before one gets serious in their relationship. Just like the topic of # of children if any one wants and religion etc. If you don't know it is important to discuss and I agree past relationships can give you much insight about your SO and through each relationship you learn and become a better (get your mind out of the gutter DF ) emotional partner hopefully.

 

[jaysonsmom]

I thought this was another DF question!

I don't have the BALLS to post this Q...

DF, you silly boy.
I used my fingers to post this.

You must have one weird-looking keyboard.
So, do you type standing up or sitting down?

OMG.....................LOLOLOLOLOL rolling off my chair!

 

[jaysonsmom]

I thought this was another DF question!

I don't have the BALLS to post this Q...

DF, you silly boy.
I used my fingers to post this.

You must have one weird-looking keyboard.
So, do you type standing up or sitting down?

OMG.....................LOLOLOLOLOL rolling off my chair!

 

[momhappy]

While I agree that past relationships can give insight, I still don't think that it's necessary to know an exact number of sexual partners. Some people get crazy-weird about things that have gone on in the past (in a jealous sort of way). I've heard stories of women forcing their significant others to throw away old love letters because they were jealous I guess I use don't see what good could come out of discussing your old sexual habits, but again, to each their own. I tend to agree with missy in that you sort of know about someone's history just based on who they are. I know my DH quite well, and I know some generalities about his past relationships, so I don't need a number.

 

[AGBF]

I wonder how many ppl that voted over 2 had it with more that one person at the same time????

another poll, kenny?

Not me.
I only do one poll at a time.

I was wondering if we could get a breakdown by sex and sexual preference in a poll. My own experience, which is by definition limited to where I have lived, the type of people with whom I have associated, etcetera, has been that there is a difference between how many partners my gay and straight friends tended to have and my male and female friends.

My male, gay friends tended to have more partners than my straight female friends. I would be fascinated to have actual numbers on the real world, but all I have is what friends have told me. One of my friends and I tried to count her partners once when we were young and gave up at about 300, but she was definitely the exception. One of my closest friends (the mother of my godson) has had sex only with her husband of 40 plus years.

Deb/AGBF

 

[kenny]

Kenny, you must start a sex related poll everyday!...

Sorry.
Sex with relations is just going to far, even for me.

 

[ruby59]

My husband is my one and only. And I am his. We were childhood sweethearts. But technically I lost my virginity to my doctor.

 

[Sky56]

I didn't say I have no regrets!

 

[Sky56]

Looking back, kissing a lot of frogs makes the memories of it more "icky" than fun.

 

[sonnyjane]

I have no desire to have the "numbers" talk with DH. The most I've found out about his history was when he told me that when he was 20 he dated a 40 year old woman for 18 months. After that I told him I'd appreciate staying OUT of the loop lol.

 

[dk168]

Done.

DK

 

[Dreamer_D]

I know how many people my husband has been with because he told me during a conversation, but I have never told him my "number" and he has never asked! I don't mind hearing about his history, I like hearing about people's relationship experiences and the past is the past. But I know HE gets jealous even hearing about something I did 15 years ago! So, we have not had a detailed talk about such things.

I find the whole topic of sex interesting. I teach university classes on close relationships, and I find students are the most curious and interested in the classes about sex. They have so many questions! Cheating is really high on their list of important topics. But also issues of "is this normal" and "how does sex influence relationship dynamics" and "how does passion change over time." I am thinking of developing a whole class on the topic.

So, that said, a poll like this doesn't phase me at all! Once you get to the point where you are comfortable talking about masturbation (not my own , but theories and research about the topic) with 100 twenty-year-olds, everything else is tame!