How do I get my husband to live in 2005?

[DonaBella]

Let me explain my problem...I found Pricescope back in April of this year and kept the knowledge of it to myself while I lurked. Well, our 25th wedding anniversary is approaching in a little less than 5 months. I would like a totally different setting, different cut of stone...just different everything to symbolize where we are now, who I am now and where are going. I tried introducing my husband to the fact that buying diamonds and diamond rings is completely different now than it was 12 and 13 years ago when he purchased my 2nd ring(I was under the impression--until this weekend--that our 2 eldest kids help lose my first ring, but on this past Sunday night--the 25th--I learned my oldest child, deliberately took my ring the one time I took it off and while I was otherwise distracted, wore it to elementary school and lost it!

So I am still reeling from learning this newsflash...anyways, I got a replacement ring in 1992 or 93). In 2005, it costs more and there is alot more to know b4 you buy. I just want to get the most I can for the $.

My problem: my husband thinks that since I have a ring, why upgrade? He doesn''t plan to upgrade his ring any time soon so why should I? I have tried explaining to him on several other occasions when it has been just he and I and the mood was right(or so I thought) and he seemed a little more open to it.

Then we went to the PS site and to the area where you can see the costs of loose diamonds. Since the jeweler I had the 2nd ring is long gone, I cannot go that route to upgrade or I would. My hubby totally freaked out

when he saw the listing of prices for a cushion cut stone--which is what I am interested in--at around a 1.55 and up in size. I do not want to get my husband mad at me and look like I am just materialistic--which right now he does think that.

We--as a couple and 9 kids--ARE different people and have triumphed through alot which I want to reflect in my new setting. I know its a bit mushy or corny, but its true. We shine brighter, are more solid due to what we have gone through and I want to symbolize that in a new platinum setting(being more solid!) with a cushion cut center stone(we have been reshaped by time!) and add a little engraving and pave (we shine and sparkle with commitment despite how hard things have been with the years). I know it seems kind of fruity but its so true--if you knew us.

Hubby feels that since we have the original paperwork and the stones are in good shape(I get them looked at and my prongs religiously), that any jeweler should comp us the current value on an equal current setting. That is not going to happen and I checked this out with one jeweler on just this past Saturday. They said for what I have--.71 carats princess cut, VS2 and G color, with 4 diagonal baguettes, 2 side rounds--a total ring weight of 1.41 with the side stones being SI quality and G color, they would give me $3K towards a ring or upgrade in their store. Isn''t that what I should expect? I have nothing to suggest that my diamonds are certified at all or a sarin report,etc.. HELP! What do I do to help get this accomplished and help my hubby w/o making him feel "taken"?

I am not sure I have conveyed all of this mess clearly and I apologize in advance...I also thank you in advance for ANY help you can lend...

 

[DonaBella]

Oh, I should mention that I am thinking that we can only spend somewhere around $12k...maybe...MAYBE up to $14K, but that would take a miracle with the way my husband is perceiving things right now. Please help!

 

[phoenixgirl]

Maybe you could make the purchase yourself? I know it''s supposed to be an anniversary gift from him, but maybe part of your gift to him can be not making him get as educated as you are. You''re basically telling him exactly what to get anyway, so why not cut out the middle man (your husband) and be the one who works with the jeweler? You could tell him that he doesn''t have to understand your desire, he just needs to understand that this is important to you and will add to your happiness.

Remind him that you have done a LOT of research and that you understand how the pricing works these days. And remind him that nothing that is sold second-hand ever sells for the original price, even if it is like new. The second it walks out of the store it goes from being in-store merchandise to second-hand.

Have you checked out Good Old Gold''s cushion list? There are some stones in the 1.55 to 1.75 range that are in your price range, and they can give you more information on any stones that look interesting.

 

[cinnabar]

Sometimes it helps to use the analogy of cars, for men to understand how it is with girls and diamonds.

You wouldn''t choose a truck for your husband without consulting him; men know what the market price is for new or second hand vehicles, and women know more about the specs of diamonds and the pricing structure (sorry for the gender-typing generalisation, I know there are girls who know cars and boys who know diamonds too).

A car depreciates by up to 50% as soon as you drive it off the lot. Same with diamonds.

You need a new car (or even a new old car) every so many years, no matter how much you love your old one. It''s not a one-car-per-lifetime deal, so why should it be the same for diamonds? A teenager starts off with a beaten-up pickup and then gets maybe a second hand Honda Civic, eventually he dreams of getting a BMW or a Hummer or whatever.

Girls dream of bigger, more expensive diamonds. It''s no different than boys and cars. Or speedboats, if that''s his thing.

 

[MissAva]

How old are your children? Is it possible that he is worried about having the college tution thing taken care of? Sometimes men see things diffrently and there may be a reason he is hesitent. Also he may feel that since it is an anniversry not a birthday that amount of money ought to be spent on something that is for both of you, which both of you can enjoy, or that your entire family can enjoy.

 

[pad3006]

Hi DeAnne;
My mom worked selling diamonds for years and what she always told men who came in and would baulk at the price of a dimaond, was that a person easily can spend 20,000 on a car that will last 5 to 8 years. However, diamond rings dont ever "die" or get too expensive to repair. One day you can pass it on to your kids when they are ready to be engaged/married.

It makes sense to me and I think that he should see the wisdom in that as well. I know sometimes men get stuck in there ways as they get older but I am sure as he see''s your excitement he will support you even though he doesnt understand why diamonds cost so much now.
I really hope you get the ring you want.
Take care, and good luck.

Phil

 

[MissGotRocks]

It is difficult to sway someone to make a large purchase when they don''t see the need for it. Truth be told, there is no ''need'' for a diamond or a bigger diamond. It is truly something that we want - not need.

It would be a very nice gesture on his part to go along with your idea and maybe in time he will. Makes me think that he thinks the money should go to something more practical or maybe something both of you will enjoy. Men don''t read minds; you''ve certainly told him what you want and why you want it and think it appropriate. The rest is probably up to him at this point. Is there something he wants? A tit for a tat usually always works for all couples - provided the funds are there. I do think that a major purchase needs to be agreed on by the both of you. Otherwise, it will be fuel for fire in any future arguments or disagreements that you may have down the road and that may be too large a price to pay for getting something you want. Not a sermon. . . just something to think about.

Good luck - let us know how the situation turns out!

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 9/26/2005 6:19:20 PM
Author: phoenixgirl
Maybe you could make the purchase yourself? I know it''s supposed to be an anniversary gift from him, but maybe part of your gift to him can be not making him get as educated as you are. You''re basically telling him exactly what to get anyway, so why not cut out the middle man (your husband) and be the one who works with the jeweler? You could tell him that he doesn''t have to understand your desire, he just needs to understand that this is important to you and will add to your happiness.

Remind him that you have done a LOT of research and that you understand how the pricing works these days. And remind him that nothing that is sold second-hand ever sells for the original price, even if it is like new. The second it walks out of the store it goes from being in-store merchandise to second-hand.

Have you checked out Good Old Gold''s cushion list? There are some stones in the 1.55 to 1.75 range that are in your price range, and they can give you more information on any stones that look interesting.

Hi Phoenixgirl...

I appreciate your suggestion, however, I did that with the second ring and all he did was pay for it and he said he felt like all I needed him for was to pay for it. I wanted to avoid leaving him out, hence, part of my reason for including him. He did mention in one of our conversations about this matter whether I wanted to be surprised by him and the ring. I definitely want a say in this ring, but I wouldn''t be opposed if he asked and inquired more about my preferences on the ring itself.

You had good points though on the truth about 2nd hand merchandise not ever selling the same as if new. Oh, and my rough estimate of $12K to $14K includes the cost of the setting. Thanks for all of your suggestions...its better than what I had before starting this thread.

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 9/26/2005 6:35:34 PM
Author: cinnabar
Sometimes it helps to use the analogy of cars, for men to understand how it is with girls and diamonds.

You wouldn''t choose a truck for your husband without consulting him; men know what the market price is for new or second hand vehicles, and women know more about the specs of diamonds and the pricing structure (sorry for the gender-typing generalisation, I know there are girls who know cars and boys who know diamonds too).

A car depreciates by up to 50% as soon as you drive it off the lot. Same with diamonds.

You need a new car (or even a new old car) every so many years, no matter how much you love your old one. It''s not a one-car-per-lifetime deal, so why should it be the same for diamonds? A teenager starts off with a beaten-up pickup and then gets maybe a second hand Honda Civic, eventually he dreams of getting a BMW or a Hummer or whatever.

Girls dream of bigger, more expensive diamonds. It''s no different than boys and cars. Or speedboats, if that''s his thing.

Good analogy, Cinnabar!

I definitely want to explore the possibility of the new car analogy...my hubby is an accountant by degree and nature so I need to approach this as emotionally free as possible--which is extremely tough for me cuz this whole diamond ring thing IS an emotional thing for me. I personally miss wearing a wedding ring. I have had a single ring for awhile and a jeweler told me the other day that the shank of my current ring is too thick for my finger. BTW, he has a 745 iL BMW and is seriously leaning towards buying a Prius cuz of the cost effectiveness in fuel...

Thanks Cinnabar for your help!

 

[Joane]

Date: 9/26/2005 6:35:34 PM
Author: cinnabar
Sometimes it helps to use the analogy of cars, for men to understand how it is with girls and diamonds.

I think this is a good analogy and there is also the issue of the difference in the prices of cars today vs. 12 or 13 years ago. You wouldn''t expect to get a new car today at the price paid way back then. Good luck!

 

[IrishEyes]

Here''s what I think:

You gave him 9 beautiful children. He should now give you anything you want. Period. End of discussion.

Hope it works out for you

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 9/26/2005 6:47:36 PM
Author: Matatora
How old are your children? Is it possible that he is worried about having the college tution thing taken care of? Sometimes men see things diffrently and there may be a reason he is hesitent. Also he may feel that since it is an anniversry not a birthday that amount of money ought to be spent on something that is for both of you, which both of you can enjoy, or that your entire family can enjoy.

Hi Matatora...

Our kids--23 1/2, 22 1/2, 20 1/2, 19, 16 1/2, 15, 13 1/2, 10 1/2, and 8 1/2 years old. Our eldest four are in college, with our eldest, a daughter, graduating this year. We own 2 local businesses--a dance studio that the eldest daughter teaches at--and a flower shop that the eldest son runs as the store manager while he attends college at night. Our 3rd child, a daughter, attends college and works at a local restaurant. Our second son and 4th child attends college and sells cell phones at our local mall. All 9 kids live with us. My hubby is a brilliant computer software/accounting business consultant with a degree in accounting and has his own consulting business. He does do taxes for a select amount of clientele and is a devoted father. I am not an easy person to live with(I am of Spanish, Italian, German, Swedish and Navajo descent--hence, my spicey and passionate personality

), but my hubby is not the most romantic guy yet he makes up for it in his loyalty, wit and spunk. The Cal-Pell grants and other grant monies have the kids covered. My hubby would like a private adult trip like with a Sandals resort--which is a great gift for us both and I agree with him on that. My hubby has always been a bit hesitant to spend $, even when after we do, it proves itself to be the right thing. Case in point; In 1990, we bought a home here in Riverside, CA that we had quickly grown out of as our family size grew. In 2001, the housing market was on the brink of exploding and houses were being built around us that were still within our reach financially and were finally big enough as well for our family. I had been in constant contact with a realtor friend of ours during the past 6 months and she said that if we were to sell and to move up, now was the time, so I told hubby about this and he scoffed it off as a way to get him to spend more $ which he was not ready to do. He did see the tight dwelling situation of our family, but was holding fast to not wanting to have a new mortgage for another 30 years. Well, we did DO it and bought our current home and less than a year later, we couldn''t believe our eyes when the EXACT same house across the street sold for slightly over double what we paid! Suddenly, we were the smart ones and he commented to me very humbly that he was glad that I convinced HIM to buy.

My hubby is a dear, sweet frugal man who, because of his thriftiness, has afforded me the opportunity to live as I do with what I have. I am not a wife that demands new baubles or more diamonds than I would realistically wear in any given month(eg. earrings and wedding rings and that''s it!--that is all I would wear without it being too much for me...less is more). I do wear nice clothes and we are known in our community due to the 2 local businesses, but I am the same person now that I have always been in that regard. Our family has been enjoying a fabulous rock swimming pool complete with 2 waterfalls--a large one and a mini one--and a palapa covered bbq island that was no bargain price, but we have truly enjoyed it and had many pool/bbq parties this summer. Our friends and family have enjoyed our backyard immensely and it feels good to know that we paid cash for 3/4 of it as it was being done. Outside of our eldest son''s wedding which is in May of 2006, we are pretty much like others around here...just dealing with paying our monthly obligations and enjoying a little with entertainment now and then. Ok, ok...so we are probably the only family that has 9 kids and all living at home.

I just want a special commeration for our anniversary in regards to my wedding ring. I feel like I should not have to present my case to him why this is a necessary expense with what I have done and am doing for our family and him. Should he ask, I am prepared however.

Thanks for your help!

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 9/26/2005 8:11:31 PM
Author: MissGotRocks
It is difficult to sway someone to make a large purchase when they don''t see the need for it. Truth be told, there is no ''need'' for a diamond or a bigger diamond. It is truly something that we want - not need.

It would be a very nice gesture on his part to go along with your idea and maybe in time he will. Makes me think that he thinks the money should go to something more practical or maybe something both of you will enjoy. Men don''t read minds; you''ve certainly told him what you want and why you want it and think it appropriate. The rest is probably up to him at this point. Is there something he wants? A tit for a tat usually always works for all couples - provided the funds are there. I do think that a major purchase needs to be agreed on by the both of you. Otherwise, it will be fuel for fire in any future arguments or disagreements that you may have down the road and that may be too large a price to pay for getting something you want. Not a sermon. . . just something to think about.

Good luck - let us know how the situation turns out!

Ok, MissGotRocks...I hear what you are saying...true, no one NEEDS a wedding ring to be married...If the truth be told, even if I had my original wedding ring set--the ones my eldest daughter coughed up the truth to losing--I would still most likely want the change. It IS a want and I have had to put alot of MY personal wants and desires on HOLD over the years for family needs and obligations. The second ring was so I "looked" married to other men. I was being hit on even with my kids in my arms in public settings, hence the purchase of ring #2. I have no emotional attachment to it because of that. This ring for me holds alot of promise of my hubby and I sharing the experience to be a part of the design process or choosing process. This is OUR anniversary--not just mine. I inquired about what dream he has and what he wants I am seriously considering a way to make happen: he wants his eyes lasiked so he can see without his glasses. His eyes are really bad but our eye dr. recently told him it WAS possible so I have a call into that dr. for more info. to make that happen. My hubby is not a person who would spend alot of $ on himself even for something like his eyes without thinking, rethinking and rethinking it again. I want his surgery MORE than I want MY NEW RING!

Hmmm...maybe I should tell him that? I am not sure how he''d respond...I let you know what I decide and how it goes...

 

[Mara]

Date: 9/26/2005 11:11:48 PM
Author: IrishEyes
Here''s what I think:

You gave him 9 beautiful children. He should now give you anything you want. Period. End of discussion.

Hope it works out for you

Haha, my thoughts exactly!

Men don''t often understand why women want the things they do, whether it be a purse, a bi-weekly pedicure or a new diamond or ring...but personally I feel like if one of you wants something very badly and it can be afforded, then you should have it. If my husband is really into something (aka cars or music instruments) and we can afford it then fabulous. He should do what he wants. Same with diamonds for me or other things. Life is about living it...sure you don''t want to be foolish with spending, but surely a few luxuries here and there if you can afford it are doable. That''s how we both tend to look at things.

 

[MrsFrk]

Okay, besides the NINE CHILDREN thing, for which I think you should be given a Nobel Prize or something...
The MSRP on a 745iL is what, about $75,000?
You''re not asking for a $75,000 diamond, though god knows you deserve it!
You''re talking a KIA. A used Camry. LESS than a new Civic.

So, if you''re materialistic for wanting an upgrade worth $14,000, he is AT LEAST 5 times more materialistic than you are.
Even a Prius is double the cost of the ring you want.

You need to get over the notion that you are being materialistic (you''re not) and just make it very clear to him that this is something you need. With 9 children, I''m sure you''ve spent the years subsuming your desires for your husband and children, but now it''s ME time.

It''s DeannaBanana time, dammit.

 

[DonaBella]

Oh, MrsFrk!, you crack me up! And thank you...you doll...for your kind and candid thoughts! My hubby''s car--FYI--is a used 2001 and got it for a steal of around $45K...which is STILL WAY less than anywhere CLOSE to what I would ever DREAM of spending on ANY kind of ring for me.

I guess I am feeling I deserve a little "me" time and "me" purchases. It is so easy when you are a mom--and it doesn''t have to be mom to 9 kids to feel this way--to just do for others ALL the time. Our kids mouthy like other parents kids, with the older ones being sometimes more of a headache than the younger ones. I was the mom who literally was "living" in the minivan as I drove 2 to little league practice and then dropped off the girls for dance, only to be back in time for pick up of the 2 at little league practice and then back to the dance studio. I have done that for YEARS. It is SO nice to have kids that drive and a little freedom. I do long for them to begin to leave home though. I have quite a few and I need more elbow room for the others and myself.

I am working on me more these days with going to the gym 2-3x a week, eating what I want for lunch, delegating out more and relaxing my standards a bit to give them a chance to get a little uncomfortable with the house(that is SO hard for me!), but I have to do it.

My relationship with my hubby is changing too, yet also staying constant. He and I have to help the older ones see their place and the need for their contribution to running the home, yet also keep the lines of communication open as they mature. That is SO tough to do...sometimes I wish they were little again so I had full control again...NAH...its ok the way things are...

Thanks for your words of strong support...your right...it IS DeannaBana Time! I will keep you informed...

 

[Rae~]

Date: 9/26/2005 11:21:56 PM
Author: DeannaBana
Hi Matatora...

...blah...blah...blah...blah... All 9 kids live with us... blah... blah...blah....blah....

OMG!!!! Are you serious!!!! You deserve more than just a RING upgrade - how about a matching earring and necklace set as well!!!!

And no offence at all intended with the "blah"s, either.... just that after reading that one sentence, everything else dissolved!!!! That''s incredible.

Mind you, I am sure my Mum would love it if we all still lived at home..... or so she says....

Best of luck in your quest to get your hubby to see your perspective. Personally - I suggest slapping him with a wet fish!!

 

[Sundial]

Deanna there is no question that you deserve to have a new ring as long as you can afford it, but I also have a very practical husband so I can understand your situation. I have been married for 28 years and decided that I wanted to upgrade to a three stone ring with better cut diamonds. Now it would have been nice if my husband would have decided on his own that I needed an upgrade and surprised me, but he just didn't see the need to replace my old ring which was already an upgrade from several years back. I didn't nag about it, but periodically I would mention that I felt my ring was looking dated and that I really wanted to get something in a white metal. I let him know that I was doing some research on the internet, kind of what I was looking for, and about what I thought it would cost. I had planned to choose some diamonds and settings online and then get his input on making a final selection. Just sort of treating it as if it were a done deal. Then one day he played in a golf tournament and was paired with a local jeweler that we have done business with before. He mentioned my quest for an upgrade and next thing I know this very interprising jeweler has fixed my husband up with a gorgeous Hearts on Fire three stone ring in white gold! It wasn't exactly what I would have purchased online (and a lot pricier), but I love it and it was nice that my husband did get involved finally. You can win your husband over on this idea, but it may take a little patience and persistance.

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 9/27/2005 3:28:25 AM
Author: Rae~

Date: 9/26/2005 11:21:56 PM
Author: DeannaBana
Hi Matatora...

...blah...blah...blah...blah... All 9 kids live with us... blah... blah...blah....blah....

OMG!!!! Are you serious!!!! You deserve more than just a RING upgrade - how about a matching earring and necklace set as well!!!!

And no offence at all intended with the ''blah''s, either.... just that after reading that one sentence, everything else dissolved!!!! That''s incredible.

Mind you, I am sure my Mum would love it if we all still lived at home..... or so she says....

Best of luck in your quest to get your hubby to see your perspective. Personally - I suggest slapping him with a wet fish!!

Hi Rae...

You are wonderful!!! I am at my pc b4 taking my jr higher to school and I am trying hard not to wake others up!

Your comments are too much! I apologize for rambling, but I realize to most, I am quite the unusual find---a mom with 9 kids, all still living at home and a mom who can still (for the most part) still think, act and be sane. My 20 year old daughter would love to take issue with whether I am sane or not--she is mad at me right now, so I know NOTHING according to her!

My hubby is just plain Mr.Sensible. Unless he thinks its a good idea, it probably isn''t (in his mind). My job--the way I see it--is to continue allowing him to believe that he is the head of our home...and--what he is more unaware of than he thinks--I am the neck that every so often turns the head the way he should go!

It may take me a little bit of time, patience and elbow grease, but he''ll eventually see things as he should, I believe...

Take care...

 

[DonaBella]

Date: 9/27/2005 9:05:12 AM
Author: Sundial
Deanna there is no question that you deserve to have a new ring as long as you can afford it, but I also have a very practical husband so I can understand your situation. I have been married for 28 years and decided that I wanted to upgrade to a three stone ring with better cut diamonds. Now it would have been nice if my husband would have decided on his own that I needed an upgrade and surprised me, but he just didn''t see the need to replace my old ring which was already an upgrade from several years back. I didn''t nag about it, but periodically I would mention that I felt my ring was looking dated and that I really wanted to get something in a white metal. I let him know that I was doing some research on the internet, kind of what I was looking for, and about what I thought it would cost. I had planned to choose some diamonds and settings online and then get his input on making a final selection. Just sort of treating it as if it were a done deal. Then one day he played in a golf tournament and was paired with a local jeweler that we have done business with before. He mentioned my quest for an upgrade and next thing I know this very interprising jeweler has fixed my husband up with a gorgeous Hearts on Fire three stone ring in white gold! It wasn''t exactly what I would have purchased online (and a lot pricier), but I love it and it was nice that my husband did get involved finally. You can win your husband over on this idea, but it may take a little patience and persistance.

Oh Sundial...

Thank you for your support!!!

We love these practical guys...don''t we? At the same time, like others have said here, maybe my hubby could use a good "swat with a fish". No, I just want to awaken him to the reality of the times...and yes, it will take time to "win him over with this idea"...as you distinctly mentioned. That is why I am working on him a small bit at a time. Our anniversary is Feb. 14th--a date he chose only after I suggested to him when we got engaged that we could celebrate both each year and be done with it(again, I helped him to "think" of it as his idea) so time is of the essence. I just do not want to nag...got any ideas for THAT one???

Thanks again!

 

[Shay37]

Okay, here''s the deal. You cannot EVER make your husband understand. It will not work. I know because I have one. He has absolutely no interest in anything jewelry. Having said that, we made a deal when we were dating that we would not assume we knew what the other thought or felt (even if we did). I am not a mind reader and neither is he. If I want a particular something (jewelry) for Christmas or my B-day or anniversary, I must ask and be specific. He might ask why I want it, and I just smile and say BECAUSE I DO. I know that I can never make him understand why. It would be like me trying to explain to my 3 year old why the sky is blue. He just won''t get it. I''m okay with that.

I have found a way to reach him though. He is absolutely addicted to Battlefield 2 (computer game). He loves comps. and is even going to build his next one. This led to a ten-minute dissertation on the pros and cons of each particular component when I was an unwilling captive in the van the other day. I believe that my eyes glazed over about 30 seconds into his presentation, but I covered that with my sunglasses and an occasional, "Oh, wow, awesome, honey." He was happy and clueless about my lack of interest.

Today I was talking about diamonds. My ring in particular and the expected arrival date, as well as a really awful diamond I saw at the store the other day. I saw his eyes glaze over. He got up and left the room, and when he came back I decided to confront him. I told him how really rude it was to show that he didn''t care like that. I told him how I handled his computer talk, and that the least he could do was fake some enthusiasm.

He thought the whole thing was hilarious, and then asked about the diamond I had been trying to tell him about. I told him enough about it to make me happy, and he says to me, "Was that better? Did I do okay? You believed I cared, right?" I cracked up laughing. I said, "Now that''s what I''m talking about!" I loved it. Bottom line: We both ended up happy.

DB, try something different (perhaps humorous). You never know, it just might work.

Shay

 

[Lorelei]

If he is the economical type you might want to casually toss out the remark" oh by the way dear, I was reading from the experts on PS how the price of diamonds is set to go through the roof soon, don''t you think it might be best to buy now?"

That comment might goad him into action!

 

[Sundial]

Here''s what I would say: "honey we have our BIG 25th coming up and with the kids still at home it will be hard for us to take a far away trip to celebrate. I would rather have something that lasts to remember the occasion anyway. You know that I would really like to get a new ring and it would mean a lot to me. I can save us a lot of money by buying online and still get what I want. To me a new ring is like a renewal of our wedding vows. My old ring can be a right hand ring until I can pass it on to one of the kids when they get married. What special thing would YOU like for our anniversary?"

 

[Shay37]

The other thing that really helped turn my DH around as far as diamonds is PS. The first diamond we bought together was a crappy maul marquise. That is a whole nother story.

My husband REALLLY dislikes getting taken for a ride.

Once he realized that I had access to some really great diamonds at reasonable prices, not to mention some really fab setting options, he wasn''t so against it. He just doesn''t like to analyze it to death.

He actually said today that he is enjoying this process more because he knows that we are getting great value for our money. He doesn''t want a steal, and neither do I. I just want what I get to be worth what I paid for it. IMO, this is what makes PS a great place. I have access to places that I never knew existed for diamond shopping. The vendors here are great, and you know that they will work with your budget to make your ring special.

Maybe this is the approach that will work with your DH. He does sound very practical (as am I).

Shay