HELP! Need to avoid the

[fleur-de-lis]

Hi ladies! I''ve been so impressed by both the helpful spirit of the posters here, as well as the mad-shopping-research-skills demonstrated in this sub-forum, so that when I encountered a bit of a shopping problem, asking here on Pricescope was the first thing that came to mind. Any and all help/advice/tips/links appreciated!

In a few weeks, I will be headed off to Kauai with my fiance and his extended family for a couple of weeks. I''m good-to-go for daytime, but nighttime is proving to be a bit of a problem. Based on past experiences, it is likely that the entire clan will hang out for a couple of hours after dinner in their jammies playing board games, watching movies, and playing with the toddlers. Looking in my wardrobe, nothing seems right: wiggling around on the floor to play with the 3 year old nephew while wearing short/sexy little chemises just doesn''t seem appropriate in front of FFIL and FMIL, nor does wearing a slightly sheer anything without a robe over it seem the proper sartorial choice over an extended game of Monopoly with the future BILS either.

The house is on a cliff overlooking the ocean, so it is cooled by breezes, not A/C. Sometimes, it can be sticky, so lightweight sleepstuff is key. Lightweight is good; see-through is not (for obvious reasons). Part of the catch-22 of needing lightweight stuff is the... err... nip factor needs to be avoided. After walking around the shops this weekend and talking myself out of pretty much everything for one reason or another, I realize I need an outside perspective! So here are my questions/restrictions:



1. First question: which do you think is more appropriate in this situation, a sleep chemise and robe, or a tank top and boy shorts? I normally am a Cosabella long chemise sort of girl, but for some reason this season I''m not finding cute matching robes that would make that an option unless the chemises are super-short and super-sexy. And when I look at the boy short option, I find myself talking myself out of it because if one of the men were walking around in what is essentially a wife-beater and boxer shorts only, I''d be thinking to myself, dude, buy some pajamas or a robe or something! (But, do I need to get over that association?) Which do you think would be better? Or is there something else that I''ve overlooked?


2. Second question: do any lines make matching robes any more? Other than black, that is. Considering it''s Hawaii, I''m thinking something in a beautiful color, like blues or greens or coral, but I''m open to anything. I so rarely buy in this category, and I would like to get something really cute.


3. Third question: can you recommend any great websites or supply any links? I''ve never really gotten into online shopping for clothes, but I still have time to order something and I''d love to hear of some of you fave online shops.



HELP!! I''m normally so great at the shopping thing... I don''t know what has happened to me!

 

[neatfreak]

Honestly? I don''t think either of those options are exactly appropriate for hanging out with the family. I would buy pajama pants and a t-shirt, or something like that and save the sexy stuff for when you get back. Sexy is not something you want to be when hanging out with your FI''s family IMO...

 

[decodelighted]

Here is the magic formula:

#1 -- Lightweight pajama bottoms from Old Navy or something (which can be rolled up to capri length)

#2 -- Pajama weight sheer T-shirt

#3 -- T-shirt material lace-trimmed cami layered ON TOP OF THE t-shirt.


Voila! You're welcome.

ETA: This whole ensemble can be gathered at your nearest Tar-jay. (Target) For about $25 total.

 

[E B]

None of the above. I'd do something like this (maybe not white), with a light robe thrown on top to conceal any nipplage. If it proves too hot to sleep in, you can change when you go to bed.

JMO. I'm a bit modest, though.

ETA: Avoid any pants that have "PINK" written across the butt, found at Victorias Secret.

 

[neatfreak]

Something like this would be perfect IMO:

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2960437?Category=&Search=True&SearchType=keywordsearch&keyword=pajama+in+All+Categories&origin=searchresults

or this:

http://shop.nordstrom.com/S/2960431?Category=&Search=True&SearchType=keywordsearch&keyword=pajama+in+All+Categories&origin=searchresults

 

[fleur-de-lis]

Ooh! I hadn''t even thought about Victoria''s Secret or Old Navy! I''m more of a Nordstrom or NM girl, but I definitely need to broaden the search.

Neatfreak, I really really like that first one; if it''s an evening where rain doesn''t come to break the heat, it can be WAAAAY too warm for covered arms or legs, but the top on that first one is really cute and flirty without being overtly sexual. Mmmm... I like that. Actually, I guess I should clarify some information (though I don''t know if this is just me stacking the deck, heh heh). Past experience has shown that it really is too warm for multiple layers, sleep pants or sleep capris; on past trips, even my then-late-50s FMIL wore something more abbreviated. (I recall that she wore a matching T-shirt and long matching shorts in a cotton jersey material on one trip, and I think a menswear-inspired cotton oxfordcloth button-down short jammies set as well.) Okay, so "boyshorts" is definitely an incorrect search term now that I''m looking at it; but if FMIL wears shorts that come above the knee, does that mean it''s copacetic?

Since a picture is worth a thousand words, I''d say both FMIL (60) and FSIL (40) wear things that are somewhat similar to the following, except that the shorts have maybe another 6" of inseam to them. (Of course, I''d like to point that neither of them kneel on the sofa and suggestively tug down their tap pants, which from what I can glean from the Victoria''s Secret Website is how VS expects their items to be worn.

)

 

[fleur-de-lis]

Left to my own devices, I''d probably choose something like this (though I hope I''d fight the urge to hoist it up to show some additional leg

), but is it still too, err, womanly?:

 

[fleur-de-lis]

From the nordstrom website, is this cute/okay (the neckline seems similar to that first one you posted Neatfreak) or, despite the fact that we''re all hanging out in swimwear/bikinis during the day, are the shorts too short?:

 

[fleur-de-lis]

Okay, this looks super-hawaiian AND it has the benefit of not being from the VS website so the model is not overly skanking it up, but a henley top like this would likely be, err, too revealing without some underlayer of support, right?

 

[neatfreak]

I *personally* think the shorts are too short. Shorts that are above the knee of course are fine, but anything that is within a few inches of your crotch is just too short to hang around in, or else my fear is that you'll end up hanging out in front of the in laws! As unsexy as it may be, I would try to stay around the length of your in-laws shorts...no need to overexpose yourself ya know?

I do think that both those shirts are totally fine though.

 

[Deelight]

Date: 6/16/2008 6:35:37 PM
Author: neatfreak
I *personally* think the shorts are too short. Shorts that are above the knee of course are fine, but anything that is within a few inches of your crotch is just too short to hang around in, or else my fear is that you''ll end up hanging out in front of the in laws! As unsexy as it may be, I would try to stay around the length of your in-laws shorts...no need to overexpose yourself ya know?


I do think that both those shirts are totally fine though.

Ditto something around the mid thigh usually good I would be looking for something that I could play games in sit comfortably and not be flashing anything.

Also if your worried about thing peeping out get a singlet with a support shelf in it it should help with that problem .

I really like what Ebree posted

 

[Linda W]

Date: 6/16/2008 3:50:35 PM
Author: EBree
None of the above. I''d do something like this (maybe not white), with a light robe thrown on top to conceal any nipplage. If it proves too hot to sleep in, you can change when you go to bed.


JMO. I''m a bit modest, though.


ETA: Avoid any pants that have ''PINK'' written across the butt, found at Victorias Secret.

Ebree: I love this. This is what my daughter wears and she doesn''t have PINK written across her fanny either, ha ha ha ha ha ha. Your comment really made me chuckle.

 

[monarch64]

Ok, so I know you said the weather there is too hot for covering arms and legs, but I have to tell you I''ve been wearing VS Mayfair PJ''s for years (love them in white), and they are actually very cool and comfortable, and also provide great coverage if you wear a cami with shelf bra underneath and leave the top unbuttoned. I wear them all summer even in Chicago heat/humidity in August and am not uncomfortable.

As far as the "ahem", headlight coverage...there is a product called "breast petals" that just sticks on over the nipples so you don''t have to wear a bra but don''t look all pointy. I think they come three pair to a package and you can find them at most major department stores and sometimes discounters like SteinMart or TJ Maxx.

Otherwise, I like to wear a cotton chemise with cotton wide-waistband shorts underneath if DH and I are sitting outside on our patio at night or early morning. I just throw on a nude bra underneath if it''s daylight hours. That way I''m staying cool but somewhat covered.

 

[miraclesrule]

I agree with the conservative posters here. Sometimes I am embarrassed at the "way too short shorts" or "dress" that my daughter wears. If someone mentions the latter I usually just brush it off and say "Oh I know, in her rush she accidently forgot her pants".

I think one should save the sexy scandalous for private and be cute and wholesome, which is even more sexy, for public views....especially with future in laws.

 

[trillionaire]

I vacationed with SO''s family and went through a similiar panic. I went with Capri lounge pants (not too tight) and a camisole (lacy at the top, spaghetti straps) and a sweater, for when I was in mixed company. Target has a lot of pj''s, for something simple and affordable. They are a little more "adult" than Old Navy, but I shop there too for chemises...

t-shirt and bermudas would work, too. I wouldn''t suggest anything remotely sexy... You can always change later...

 

[fleur-de-lis]

Wow, everyone, thank you so much!

Okay, okay, you've converted me, LOL. MiraclesRule, though I've matured enough to lower the hemlines a bit in recent years, I confess that I too have probably given my mother the vapors a time or too when I was 18 over my, err, abbreviated attire. As shockingly short as some of my skirts have been over the years though, at least I've never crossed over to the dark side and walked around with either "Juicy" or "Pink" scrawled across my posterior! Ebree, I totally agree with your ETA-- and it totally cracked me up like it did for both Linda and Deelight. You rule! Most of all, Neatfreak, though you self-describe as being very conservative, I think your natural modesty is what I need to emulate a bit more. So now that I've let go of my images of fine silk chemises and robes with french seams and clever fasteners, I think Deco has nailed what I need to do: layers. How do you think this sounds:

--cami with shelf as underlayer
--cute crisp cotton shorts on bottom with matching crisp button-down short-sleeve pajama top as a casual/substitute robe (so that everything is cool and airy, but there are at least 3 layers on the girls)?



Camis are everywhere, but can any of the shopping experts help me find a summer pajama set whose shorts are long enough to be modest? Trillionaire, do they have these things at Target? If it were to up to me, I'd head out to VS this afternoon and buy the Mayfair that Monarch suggested-- it looks VERY sleepable in the heat-- but after reading all your posts, I'm afraid of pulling a MiracleRules's daughter because these shorts still look pretty short.

Can anyone find a slightly longer version of it (a photo of which I'll attach, though I *promise* not to sit around in this pose, LOL) and post a link? You've all already been so great-- THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR HELP! (Man, I love PS!)

 

[Skippy123]

Date: 6/16/2008 5:27:40 PM
Author: fleur-de-lis
From the nordstrom website, is this cute/okay (the neckline seems similar to that first one you posted Neatfreak) or, despite the fact that we're all hanging out in swimwear/bikinis during the day, are the shorts too short?:

I like this. Also, Avanti is sold on Kaui in the town of Lihue http://avantishirts.com/jsp/product_list.jsp?categoryid=4 which is appropriate casual Hawaii wear. Have fun, Kauai is my favorite island!!!

 

[neatfreak]

Fleur: I will look for you. I think something like that with the shorts a tad longer would be PERFECT. Or you could even do capri''s and a thickish strapped camisole, and voila, you are good to go.

Despite my comments I too am young (25!), but I also teach college students and see what the little tartlets wear and I am just naturally appalled by a lot of it...especially the thought of wearing it in front of my MIL.

So I was just trying to think what would make everyone comfortable no matter how conservative his family is.

 

[fleur-de-lis]

Date: 6/19/2008 5:49:58 PM
Author: neatfreak
Fleur: I will look for you. I think something like that with the shorts a tad longer would be PERFECT. Or you could even do capri''s and a thickish strapped camisole, and voila, you are good to go.


Despite my comments I too am young (25!), but I also teach college students and see what the little tartlets wear and I am just naturally appalled by a lot of it...especially the thought of wearing it in front of my MIL.

So I was just trying to think what would make everyone comfortable no matter how conservative his family is.

Thank you! As an only partially-reformed ex-college-tartlet myself, I totally appreciate your help in preventing me from crossing back over the line!

 

[brazen_irish_hussy]

Firstly, natural fibers. They breathe so much better and you will be cooler, even in more clothes.

You could have something like these: http://www.gap.com/browse/category.do?cid=5941 The looser cami will feel good on hot nights (they are modal, which is made from beech trees and much softer than cotton in IMO) Also, the pants are looser and not quite full length

For more fun, there is anthropologie:
http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/catalog/productdetail.jsp?_dyncharset=ISO-8859-1&_dynSessConf=-4898185216103129391&id=853126&parentid=APP_COMFORT_SLEEP2&pushId=APP_COMFORT_SLEEP2&popId=APPAREL&sortProperties=&navCount=7&navAction=jump&fromCategoryPage=true&selectedProductSize=&selectedProductSize1=&color=umb linene breathes very well
http://www.anthropologie.com/anthro/catalog/productdetail.jsp?_dyncharset=ISO-8859-1&_dynSessConf=-4898185216103129391&id=853148&parentid=APP_COMFORT_ROBES&pushId=APP_COMFORT_ROBES&popId=APPAREL&sortProperties=&navCount=12&navAction=jump&fromCategoryPage=true&selectedProductSize=&selectedProductSize1=&color=pin very colorful and low key like you wanted
You should search their website as there is a lot of good stuff

 

[Deelight]

Fleur I don't know what Target is like over in the states (but I hazard a guess that it is better then here ) but they should sell something like what you posted. Usually I find they have a good range of sleepwear that is functional.

And from someone who lives in a hot humid climate stick to cotton singlets and shorts, 3/4's are best .

ETA: I would wear pj pants with pink written across my butt but maybe I am strange

 

[Fancy605]

Date: 6/16/2008 3:50:35 PM
Author: EBree
None of the above. I''d do something like this (maybe not white), with a light robe thrown on top to conceal any nipplage. If it proves too hot to sleep in, you can change when you go to bed.


JMO. I''m a bit modest, though.


ETA: Avoid any pants that have ''PINK'' written across the butt, found at Victorias Secret.

Haha. I thought it would be cute when I was a "college tartlet" because one of my sorority colors is pink. Luckily, my mother was on that shopping trip and promptly made a comment that made me think, "eww...okay, maybe not"

fleur, I am glad you decided to go with something more conservative. There is a distinct difference in Lounge wear and sleep wear if you ask me. I would DIE if my MIL ever got a glimpse of me in anything "sleep wear esque." I dated FI for 6 years, and the only thing lounge wear I could bring myself to wear around them is sleeping pants (knee length or longer) and a t-shirt layered over a cami (just in case.)