JCJD
Brilliant_Rock
- Joined
- Sep 8, 2004
- Messages
- 1,977
So as some of you wonderful ladies know, I would prefer to elope or have a tiny destination wedding, while my fiance wants a traditional wedding. I mean, at some level, the traditional wedding really is what I want, but when it comes down to it, I just want to be officially married to my man and be able to go on a wonderful honeymoon somewhere outside the US. So, FI talked me into doing the "real" wedding thing, promising that he would help me out in planning it (I''m a grad student with almost zero time to plan a wedding in 7 months, 3 months to go now). Ok, ok, he didn''t have to try too hard to convince me..... but he did have to convince me some! OK, the problem: I left for a scientific conference last Wednesday and came back yesterday, and I left him a detailed list of 4 items he needed to do for the wedding by the time I came back. I had phone numbers, company names, contact persons, specific questions to ask and/or tasks to accomplish written down on one piece of paper and I talked him through it to make sure he understood why we needed to know when the rental company would drop off and pick up the dance floor, for example. I left him to it and told him I trusted him to get it done and I didn''t mention it at all the entire time I was OOT. So, I come back yesterday, and after dinner, I asked him how he''d done on his list. He had 4 things to do - all entirely accomplishable by phone call, and 6 days to do it, 4 if you don''t include the weekend (which he could have done 2/4 tasks during). Yesterday in fact, he was done with all his work by 11am and my plane didn''t come in until 4:30pm, so he had over 5 hours of free time during the day just yesterday to make a few phone calls. So what did he accomplish you ask???
Nothing. Nada. Zilch.
He didn''t even call his brother to ask him to be a groomsman! He didn''t call to reserve the dance floor for our June evening wedding, despite our experiences with booked vendors left and right. The dance floor he decided we should get - I was neutral. Ladies, I am at my wits end. I don''t know what else I can do to get him to participate like he said he wanted to. My ultimatum (found in my "stealing my photographer" thread) threatening to cancel everything and book a Sandals wedding if he didn''t ask his groomsmen within a week only partly worked - we have 2 out of 4 asked and confirmed, the remaining two to be asked include his brother, who lives in town, I might add, and an OOT friend, although he did get that friend''s phone number within my timeline. It has taken him over 2 weeks to NOT finish his daily "Honeydew" list from March 7th. A list of two items, one of which I put on his "While JC is OOT" to-do list. I have no idea what to do next, and I am sick of getting on his tail about this - it''s like all that time that I would be spending calling vendors and making decisions about the wedding is instead spent nagging him to do said activities. Any advice, stories, reassuring words, are appreciated!! Thanks for letting me vent this! I would not be comfortable being so open about all this on the Knot - you gals are great!!
Nothing. Nada. Zilch.
He didn''t even call his brother to ask him to be a groomsman! He didn''t call to reserve the dance floor for our June evening wedding, despite our experiences with booked vendors left and right. The dance floor he decided we should get - I was neutral. Ladies, I am at my wits end. I don''t know what else I can do to get him to participate like he said he wanted to. My ultimatum (found in my "stealing my photographer" thread) threatening to cancel everything and book a Sandals wedding if he didn''t ask his groomsmen within a week only partly worked - we have 2 out of 4 asked and confirmed, the remaining two to be asked include his brother, who lives in town, I might add, and an OOT friend, although he did get that friend''s phone number within my timeline. It has taken him over 2 weeks to NOT finish his daily "Honeydew" list from March 7th. A list of two items, one of which I put on his "While JC is OOT" to-do list. I have no idea what to do next, and I am sick of getting on his tail about this - it''s like all that time that I would be spending calling vendors and making decisions about the wedding is instead spent nagging him to do said activities. Any advice, stories, reassuring words, are appreciated!! Thanks for letting me vent this! I would not be comfortable being so open about all this on the Knot - you gals are great!!