Festive or Poor Taste?

[Haven]

Please tell me if I''m being overly sensitive in this case:

There are several new multi-million dollar homes on our street, and a family recently moved in to one of them. They put up Halloween decorations all over their large home and yard, including . . . get ready . . . a life-size witch HANGING by her neck from the basketball net. By a noose.

I''m disgusted. Perhaps it''s because I just finished teaching The Crucible and the horror of what was done during the Salem witch trials is fresh in my mind. Or perhaps it''s because hangings smack so loudly of a horrible time in my nation''s history that it''s difficult to separate this image from that time. Or maybe it''s because a friend of mine hanged himself just five years ago. Whatever it is, I''m terribly upset by this decoration.

Am I overreacting? If not, is there anything I can do, or do we just have to walk past this horror display every day for the next month?

 

[Aloros]

At the worst, this is HORRIBLY offensive.

At best, it is cringe-worthy and in very bad taste. Have you introduced yourself to them yet? Maybe you could soften the blow a bit by going over, welcoming them to the neighborhood, and add a "by the way..." at the end. Most people are pretty decent. They may not even realize that it is offensive.

 

[Italiahaircolor]

You are absolutely valid in feeling whatever it is you''re feeling about the decoration...but, at the end of the day, it''s their home--and their tree--and they can do as they wish.

I adore Halloween, and love to decorate for it...but a life sized hanging witch wouldn''t be my cup of tea, either. I know what it''s like to have tacky neighbors...my neighbor has the worst yard in the world!!!!! If it werent for our association, it would a complete loss.

But regardless, I''m sorry you''ll be forced to bare witness to this for the next 31ish days...but just be thankful it''s a once a year event and not their decore year round.

 

[fleur-de-lis]

I would guess that your reaction is stronger than the average person''s... and that your reaction is quite reasonable on a personal level because of the additional personal detail in the second-to-last sentence in your second-to-last paragraph in your post.

f-d-l

 

[swingirl]

Sounds like your neighbors got a little carried away (do they have teenagers?). You could mention to them that there are some little one''s on the block who will be afraid of seeing such a gruesome and disturbing sight.

They might not realize their decorations are over-the-top for the community.

 

[Haven]

Okay, thank you. I''m overreacting. I nearly drove into a tree this morning when I first saw the hanging witch.

The thing is, we live in a pretty subdued neighborhood. We just moved to this specific neighborhood, but I grew up in the area and people don''t do big, gaudy decorations around here. We decorate, but it''s understated and family-friendly. I will say that this family''s houses and the others that were built with it are monsters compared to the rest of the street, so the decorations are an apt icing on the cake, I suppose. We have so many large yet tasteful additions and tear-downs in our neighborhood, but then a builder came in and built a row of looming, boxy, mcmansiony homes that lack the architectural detail of the rest of the town. Perhaps my distaste of their home is adding to my feelings about the witch. Well, no. I do think the witch is in poor taste.

However, I have not yet met the family. I''ll go over and say hello tomorrow. The Botanic Garden is having their Harvest Fest this weekend so we''re going to be there in the morning; I''ll find a nice fall plant to bring over to them. And maybe they do have teenagers--in which case, I''d completely understand that decor!

Thanks for your responses. I''m glad I could air out my disgust here rather than with my neighbors.

 

[Tuckins1]

Personally, I wouldn't care. It's just supposed to be creepy for Halloween. I can see where you might find it in poor taste... But I don't think it's that big of a deal. (Except I might complain just for being tacky) However, for the children, I might mention something in a nice "neighborly" way.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

gross...

 

[diamondfan]

I see some homes go a bit over the top in terms of Halloween decorations. I find some of them very scary for young kids and in poor taste, and a bit obnoxious.

 

[Kaleigh]

To me, that''s offensive. Hanging by a noose?? Not right.

 

[Hera]

Definitely in bad taste, but I wouldn''t cause strife with a new neighbor when Haloween is over in 29 days. For me, it wouldn''t be worth it.

 

[snowflakeluvr]

i don''t think you''re overreacting at all. i decorate with pumpkins, mums, scarecrows,more of a fall harvest look but one of our neighbors(big, big homes too) has a full "cemetery" of tombstones, ghouls and skeletons around their front walk...to each their own i guess...(but i tend to like more happy

decor)

 

[Diamond*Dana]

I am not really sure if it would bother me or not, but I do not think that you are being overly sensitive...if it bothers you, then it bothers you. I do think that something like that would be scary to little kids, though. I know that my kids would not want to stop at that house for trick or treating!

I agree with the poster that said that it would not be worth it to say anything...it is only temporary, and I am sure that you will be neighbors long after the witch comes down.

 

[VRBeauty]

Whether it's festive in poor taste is really beside the point, if it truly makes you uncomfortable. Give yourself a few days and see if you react less strongly -- you might decide that you can ignore it after all. But... if it continues to put you on edge (in your gut, not in your head) then I think you should consider asking the neighbors to change it, at least until we're a little closer to Halloween. I'm sure your neighbors realize that their decor is pushing limits, and I think any neighbor worth their cup of sugar would agree to compromise if you tell them that you have a visceral reaction because of your own experience with hangings. And BTW, I think this is one of those times when it's perfectly acceptable to enlist your DH to talk to the neighbors with or for you.

That's my 2 cents worth!

 

[SarahLovesJS]

I don''t really like Halloween, so I might have a bias..but yeah, it''s poor taste.

 

[Linda W]

I agree with the others, it is in very poor taste. Can you imagine the little children seeing that horrid thing?

 

[jewelerman]

very poor taste.

 

[LaraOnline]

Date: 10/3/2008 10:47:46 PM
Author: Kaleigh
To me, that's offensive. Hanging by a noose?? Not right.

I agree. My sister hanged herself. There are lots of people in the community who find 'jokes' about lynchings, executions and other representations of violence as not funny, but offensive.

Mind you, because of this mind-set, I find myself completely out of whack with most of what passes for 'popular' culture at the movies, television programmes.

So, don't expect the neigbours to be sympathetic to your point of view.
They'll probably think you 'think too much' or some such.

 

[bee*]

Date: 10/4/2008 1:52:09 AM
Author: SarahLovesJS
I don''t really like Halloween, so I might have a bias..but yeah, it''s poor taste.

me too.

 

[Maisie]

I hate Halloween. If I saw that it would completely freak me out. I probably couldn''t walk past their house.

 

[princesss]

I''d be offended, and I''d probably say something after I calmed down. Halloween is no reason to have something that explicit.

 

[vespergirl]

Haven, that''s horrible. You are not being overly sensitive. Do you have a nighborhood association? Our NA would freak out if someone put something like that up.

 

[strmrdr]

To me its festive it was very common growing up to hang "ghosts" and "witches" and "scarecrows" and "skeletons" from trees for Halloween.
They are much better than the dumb blow up stuff of today.
I hate Halloween for other reasons now but I would look at it and go kewl.

 

[LuckyTexan]

I''m with you.
That''s MORE than bad taste.
I think that should be illegal.

I actually confronted management, and stopped shopping at a local grocery store because of the huge display they had for halloween that scared my son.

 

[VegasAngel]

Bad taste. What was wrong with just propping or hanging it in a normal manner? I'm guessing you dont have an HOA you could always ask them, there is the anonymous note option. Talking to them face to face is the best way to do it but these days you just never know how someone you dont know, may react.

 

[isaku5]

Haven, you''re not being oversensitive at all! To me that absolutely reeks of bad taste and is beyond offensive.

I don''t mind Halloween at all, and enjoy having the little ones coming to the door saying, "Trick or treat?" Most of the decorating around where we live is mild compared to what you''re describing.

As to what can be done about it - probably nothing. Unless their next door neighbours are offended and speak to them about it, I can''t see anything positive coming from it.

Talk about no class. They may live in a mcmansion, but their "decoration" bespeaks chicken coop.

 

[luckystar112]

My vote is for festive.

 

[Haven]

Thanks for all of your responses--truth is, I was half expecting everyone to tell me to calm down, so it''s nice to know that I''m not totally off base here.

We invited my husband''s brother and his family to join us at the Botanic Garden''s Harvest Fest (which was great, by the way) so they drove past the horrid decorations on the way to our house. When I opened the door my SIL said "I cannot believe those awful decorations--what is wrong with those people?" So, I''m not the only one who reacted that way. (SIL and family live just two miles from us, so they know the neighborhood well, too.)

Anyway, I decided I''m not going to say anything about it to the neighbors. They obviously don''t think there''s anything wrong with it because they put it up in the first place, and I certainly don''t want to harbor any ill feelings with them. We''re hoping to live here for a long time, so we''ll probably be seeing them for quite a while.

Thanks for weighing in, everyone!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Just wait until Christmas, Haven. That''ll probably be like a Chevy Chase movie!

(I also dislike Halloween and would not like the decorations. But I don''t think there is anything unusual about that particular thing, considering.)

 

[beaujolais]

Blech. Poor taste.