ever experience a

[Defender]

...sitatuation where a stone is too big?

I am shopping for a stone and seem to be creeping up in size range. However, I wonder if there is ever an instance when going too big creates angst or disappointment when it is presented.

For example, will some lady who is set on a 2 carat stone be caught off guard in a negative way when she gets a 3 carat?

In my case, I have been looking in the 2.5 carat range, but wonder about going with a larger stone with a good spread, like 3 to 3.23 carats... I want to get something really great, but I do not want to go overboard either.

This is probably most applicable in larger stones, where a lady may feel self conscious that a big rock may be too big, or too much of an attention getter for daily wear-- or may feel uncomfortable in a work or professional environment with a big obvious rock.

Are there many ladies who are concerned about too much obvious rock "bling" for everyday wear.

This may be a silly question, but I am Just curious...

This question may be best answered by the professionals, who might have seen this when buyers seek to exchange a stones for these reasons

(by the way, I do not know why my topic title got chopped off...)

 

[widget]

I'm no pro, but I would guess that it's relatively rare when a stone is rejected because it's too big!

That being said, I personally think a 3ct RB would be too much of a honker for some women. There are a lot of things to consider: the woman's age, taste/lifestyle, her hand/finger size, the "circles" she runs in, etc. etc.

Now, if it were a 3ct asscher, I'd take it, and adjust my tastes, lifestyles, friends, etc. accordingly!

widget

 

[JDgirl]

I think a lot of that has to do with a girl''s size and where you live. I have a friend who is 6''1" with a size 8 finger and she and her fiance live in NY, she has a 3.3 carat, and I think it looks fine for everyday wear for her. Personally, I am 5''6" with a size 5.5 finger, and I don''t think I''d feel comfortable wearing more than 2.5 everyday. Even that seems to be a little to flashy for a lot of situations I''d find myself in.

So I guess I might base it on these questions:

Where do you and your GF live?
What does she do for a living?
How tall is she, and what size finger does she have?

This is, of course, just my opinion, some girls may never think it can be big enough.

 

[fire&ice]

Date: 3/31/2006 12:33:42 PM
Author: widget
I''m no pro, but I would guess that it''s relatively rare when a stone is rejected because it''s too big!

That being said, I personally think a 3ct RB would be too much of a honker for some women. There are a lot of things to consider: the woman''s age, taste/lifestyle, her hand/finger size, the ''circles'' she runs in, etc. etc.

Now, if it were a 3ct asscher, I''d take it, and adjust my tastes, lifestyles, friends, etc. accordingly!

widget

Yes, tell us more about your situation.

 

[iceprincess]

Date: 3/31/2006 12:36:18 PM
Author: fire&ice

Date: 3/31/2006 12:33:42 PM
Author: widget
I''m no pro, but I would guess that it''s relatively rare when a stone is rejected because it''s too big!

That being said, I personally think a 3ct RB would be too much of a honker for some women. There are a lot of things to consider: the woman''s age, taste/lifestyle, her hand/finger size, the ''circles'' she runs in, etc. etc.

Now, if it were a 3ct asscher, I''d take it, and adjust my tastes, lifestyles, friends, etc. accordingly!

widget

Yes, tell us more about your situation.

Right on. Personally, I wouldn''t think that a +3ct would be too big for moi. I have a 7.5 size finger, live in S. Cali, and I wear diamond jewelry everyday for work.

 

[Lorelei]

Difficult to answer - if she is set on a 2 ct then see if you can in a sneaky way see how she would feel about going larger, but if it seems that 2 ct is her preferred size, then it might be safer to go with that. A 2 ct is a pretty major rock anyway, especially in a round, but if you can't decide, go with a vendor with whom you can upgrade! I love big rocks so I am probably not the best person to offer an opinion

but you do have to consider that they aren't for everyone from what I have seen in my time here on occasion, it is the exception and not the rule, but not everyone is comfortable with such a large diamond for many reasons including thinking people might think it is fake, tacky etc - and the reasons Widget mentioned. It all boils down to what she feels most comfortable with. There are also some who feel that that size is just too big for their hand. I have a 3.4 ct round and in my little community it is considered outrageous, but it makes me happy, it can depend on so much. I think you need to do some detective work to see which is the best way to go, but if in doubt, get the 2ct with an upgradable vendor so to speak! Good luck!

 

[firebirdgold]

Ok,I''m going to heretical here...

I''d feel uncomfortable with too large of a diamond. I view my future e-ring as something I''d wear all the time, not just for special occasions. I just wouldn''t want to wear a 2 or 3 carat diamond while while walking around most neighborhoods let alone shopping in Walmart at 2 am.

Not only would I feel nervous but also ostentatious. I was brought up to believe that talking about or even visibly showing that you have money is in poor taste. I prefer a somewhat more discreete ring. Besides, a smaller diamond would be less likely to catch on things and be more comfortable!
If by some bizarre happenstance my bf did present me with a larger diamond, I wouldn''t hand it back and I would be impressed... But I also wouldn''t wear it much after the wedding. And privately regret not having something more wearable.

 

[aphisiglovessae]

I'm the kinda girl who likes jewelry that's a decent size, but not too large to the point where it's "not believable." In my opinion, a girl my age with a huge 3 carat honker on her hand will get more "is it real?" questions than compliments. I have a two carat fakey that my ex gave me and I still get more "is it real?" questions first. Of course I don't answer, and then the compliments start coming.

I still kinda get asked the same question with my engagement ring, but not nearly as often. I get WAY more compliments right away. The main question I get with my engagement ring is "Is that baby over a carat? (the center stone)" and I smilingly say no. Then they say "wow, that looks so big on your finger!" That's way better than them questioning it's authenticity.

I would rather someone come up to me and say "that's a gorgeous ring!" than ask me whether it's real or not. Just my preference. Also, I wouldn't want a ring that's so big and expensive that I would be scared to wear it. Some rings my mother lets me borrow just frighten me because I'm afraid of damaging it. The bigger the stone and the higher the setting, the more likely I'm going to bump and hit that baby on anything I come in contact with. Thank god mine's insured or I'd be a mess (it has a pretty high setting)!

P.S. I have a size 4.5 finger... Can you imagine how huge a 3 carat stone would look on my skinny little hands (wish my BODY was still as skinny... ugh

)???

If I was handed a huge diamond, I would rather have it set into a necklace and ask if we could shop for a smaller stone for everyday wear (if the big stone couldn't be returned).. If it could be returned, I'd ask to return it and buy something slightly smaller. I know my fiance would love me even more (poor thing is broke as a joke).

 

[bstraszheim]

Yeah, I''m with Wren on this. I love to look at the larger diamonds, and imagine what it would be like, but in real life, if I got a 2ct or larger stone, I wouldn''t wear it much. There is a lady at a shop I go to, who has an amazing round, probably around 2 ct, with tapered baguettes and the ring is just gorgeous, I have envied it many times, then stopped myself by thinking, "if you had it, you wouldn''t wear it!" I have a 1.26 kite shaped diamond pendant from my Mom, which I hardly ever wear because I find it to be too much, can you imagine me with 2ct stone? : ) Then again, sometimes I feel over the top wearing my .80tcw 10 stone wedding band, and opt for my plain platinum one : ) And yet, here I am on a diamond forum.
On the other hand, there are many ladies here who sport multi-carat rings and are absolutely happy with them.

You don''t state whether you are shopping for your (soon to be) fiancee, or if you are the one being proposed to and shopping in anticipation? If you are purchasing for your fiancee, you may want to see if she has an idea of carat size in mind. It would be far better to get her something smaller that she will wear all the time, than something larger that she just wears on special occasions. She may have a cut off point for comfort.

I wish you well,

Bridget

 

[KristyDarling]

Not a silly question at all. Yes, it is possible for a stone to be too big.....if that''s what your girl thinks. It''s such a personal preference, and like others have said where you live and your social circle may be factors as well. For example, the wives of the guys at my husband''s firm all have stones that average, I''d guess, around 3 carats (plus sidestones in some cases). Keep in mind we live in San Francisco, lots of wealthy people here. These ladies are mostly 30-40 years old and seem to carry off their rings with panache. I feel comfortable wearing my ring around them, but among my close friends, I almost never wear it (3.5 carats). I''m in my early 30''s now, but I think that once I hit my late 30''s, I''ll feel more comfy wearing it because I''ll feel like I finally "deserve" it and can wear it with pride. But for now, I still feel kinda bashful wearing it ring around. NOT that I regret having it because I adore it and can''t stop looking at it and would never give it up for anything. But, large stones DO require some extra thought, because not everyone will feel comfortable wearing it on a daily basis.

By the way, a 2 carat ring is *already a gigantic honker!* Are you and your girlfriend young, like in your 20''s or 30''s? Either way, she will love having such a large rock! Without knowing a lot about your situation, I''d suggest buying the highest quality 2 carat you can afford, then keep a future upgrade in the back of your mind. Heehee. (by the way, you are so sweet for being so open-minded about carat size! Most hubbies would just block it out completely!)

 

[Defender]

Here is our situation. We are older (she is 40), and this is a second marriage, and she had a 2.0 carat for her first e ring.

We live in L.A. and are around plenty of affluence, but she is also a professional (administrator of offices in the medical field) She is 5''9" and has a size 7 finger.

We are looking at rectangular emeralds, which may not be as flashy as many other cuts.

 

[Lorelei]

A 3 ct EC is a beautiful size, so maybe she might prefer to go larger, it sounds as if she is used to having a larger diamond anyway and is comfortable with it, an EC can go very high on the carat weight IMO and not look ostentatious, so maybe it would be a good move to shoot for 3!

 

[aphisiglovessae]

Well, considering that she''s an older woman (I was referring to women in their 20s in my previous post. I''m 25) who''s in a professional field, living in L.A. 3 carats is fabulous (especially since she''s already used to wearing a 2 carat)!!

 

[widget]

LOL....Over 40? 5'9'? LA professional? First ring was 2cts? Unless you're Donald Trump, I don't think you could get a beautiful stone that was "too big!"

Seriously...a 2-3ct rectangular EC would look fabulous...

Hope you keep us posted on your search.

widget

 

[mrssalvo]

Date: 3/31/2006 2:06:50 PM
Author: widget
LOL....Over 40? 5''9''? LA professional? First ring was 2cts? Unless you''re Donald Trump, I don''t think you could get a beautiful stone that was ''too big!''


Seriously...a 2-3ct rectangular EC would look fabulous...


Hope you keep us posted on your search.


widget

Oh I agree. a 2-3 Emerald Cut would be fabulous and I don''t think she''d have any problems wearing it and it not looking fabulous..

 

[FireGoddess]

SEs tend to face up smaller than some other cuts because of their depth so in addition to all the factors you''ve already mentioned, you can go pretty big without looking gaudy! Go for it!

 

[fire&ice]

Nope, won''t be too big!

 

[KristyDarling]

OK, now that we have those details about your lady I would say 3carats would be lovely on her, no doubts at all.

 

[KittenKat]

Woohoo! More LA People

In my situation, when we were looking for a ring, I wasn''t given a ''size'' limit, per se.

I''d told my FH that up to 1.5cts was the perfect size for me. (And I was set on an OEC or OMC - which usually appear smaller.)

When we went shopping, I had picked a few rings I fell in love with. My hubby (then boyfriend) went back to the store with his mom to pick out the exact one he''d buy. She was encouraging him to go higher in weight. She was pushing for 2cts. But he listened to my request, and went with the size I requested.

And my MIL is adorable... she stills brings up the fact that she was trying to get FH to get me a bigger stone. She doesn''t understand how I could possibly have wanted something ''small''. (She likes big bling, and wears a 5.5ct ideal round.... and oh my it is YUMMY!)

But still, I wouldn''t wear anything over 2ct as an everyday ring. Sure, I''d take a 3ct Asscher for weekend wear Although for me - I thought starting bigger wouldn''t give me much to look forward to.

 

[luvn2oxfrd]

i second widget!

at 26 (young east coast professionals) we looked at the 2-3ct range. the 3ct looked gorgeous, but a 4ct was too much for me. i looked too young to make such a large stone plausible. give me 10+ years, i would happily pull off the 4ct

 

[valeria101]

Too big to look at or take out of the drawer for the new years eve concert? Not sure what would that be - quite a bit more than I can manage, sure that!

Jewelry for frequent wear works the same as fashion - whatever one dares. I''m allot more comfortable with soft spoken pieces and (relatively) large diamonds are definitely not that. It wouldn''t help much to tell you what works for me because I''d bet my lifestyle and social circle is quite different. Not that I am a conformist in many things at all, but prefer to keep that personal style quiet - surely like jewelry to be noticed, but better at a second look than from across the street

 

[Defender]

I guess that this begs the question about wearing your diamond on an everyday basis?

I am not looking to buy this for special occassions only. How many of you take your rings on and off, depending on where they are going??

 

[KristyDarling]

I flip my ring so the stone is inside my hand and not visible whenever I'm: A) on the bus, B) on the train, C) anywhere that I feel it would attract the wrong kind of attention. When I'm with my less bling-adorned friends, I just don't wear it since I'd feel a little embarrassed by its flashiness. I wear it when I'm at work, or just hanging out with my husband and kids, when I'm out on a date with hubby, or out socially with his work friends. So I'd say I wear it about 95% of the time, and only 5-10% of that time I have the ring turned backwards on my hand for protection.

Based on what you've posted, I think your girlfriend would be very pleased to be presented with a 3 carat ring. I would strongly advise putting it on a shank that has a plain inside so that she can turn it around on her finger if she's on the bus or anywhere else she might feel uncomfortable. I think that's generally a good idea for ALL diamonds, especially larger ones. Just my 2 cents!

 

[msdarlinjoy]

Hi Defender ~

I think that if this is her second marraige, and she wore a 2ct previously ... she is definately used to the size and also any attention that it may have brought her, whether is was positive or negative.

She is also an Admin., young 40''s ... and I am sure that she can and does have authority to lay down some law where she works ... in other words ... she can fend for herself if need be.

I say:

Better get her at least a 2ct ring! I personally, if able to affoard it, would go for a 3 ct plus. If you can''t ... get as much ct wt that you can afford, you can always upgrade for a special anniversary later.

I think an EC is going to be gorgeous and classy

! Sounds absolutely delish!

Have a great day, and please keep us posted.

 

[canuk-gal]

HI:

Never thought I''d say this, but while shopping for earrings/pendant; I tired on studs weighing 2+ carats each and a pendant that was a 2.62 and I honestly felt overwhelmed. It just seemed too much all at once...although the vendors laughed until they stopped at my pensiveness. More than once I''ve heard "never too big", but I am not sure that I agree. Now, perhaps diamond jewellery is different than an ER, but in also trying on stones over 3 carats I got the same self conscious feeling. That said, given time, I think I could get used to size!!!!!!

Size, shape, quality wants/needs etc will differ from individual to individual and circumstance. Can you ask your intended what she might prefer?

cheers--Sharon

 

[widget]

Author: Defender
I am not looking to buy this for special occassions only. How many of you take your rings on and off, depending on where they are going??

I have a big diamond (3.9ct) and I wear it everywhere...wearing grubs to the supermarket, etc etc. My mother before me NEVER took it off!

I do however, flip it, and even then still feel nervous when I''m alone in the city, especially if it''s an iffy neighborhood...

widget

 

[squarediamondlove]

At first I was going to say that it depends on the sape of the stone, the setting, the age, the taste, but then when you gave more information I think the answer is pretty clear...Go with the 3ct!

My personal sweet spot for emerald cut solitares is 3ct or more.

Emeralds can pull of the larger sizes way better than rounds. Plus given that she is 40, you guys live in LA, and she previously had a 2ct a 3ct is a great size!

 

[kenny]

I think my diamond may be just a tad immodest at 0.97 lb.
It was hard to find this size since they usually cut for the full 1 lb weight!

I'm saving up for a platinum setting, and a larger loupe.

 

[aphisiglovessae]

 

[Shay37]

You do know that this a diamond forum full of addicts, right?

Get her the 3 cts.

Kenny, LOL

shay