Buying jewelry from ebay?

[february2003bride]

How do you feel about buying jewelry from ebay (or DB or LT?) that is pre-owned? Assume the seller is reputable so misrepresentation is not a concern. Would you consider buying your engagement ring setting/wedding band/anniversary band pre-owned? Does the fact that the rings have a "history" bother you? And not specifically vintage jewelry, but more recent pieces, that are being sold on ebay for reasons of divorce, financial issues, upgrading, etc.

Thanks!

 

[luv2sparkle]

I don't have any problem with it. The thing about ebay is even if the story is sad about a piece of jewelry, I probably won't know what it is. I haven't bought any diamonds on ebay though. I am amazed by some of the posters here who get such screaming great deals. I recently purchased a pair of earrings and a ring made by a company called Imperial Gold that went out of business a few years ago. A couple years ago I bought a beautiful watch with about a carat of diamonds and I think the lady was in financial distress. I kinda felt like I was helping her out.

 

[SB621]

Jewelry is like cars to me. They depreciate in value the moment you take posession of them. So I have no problem buying pre-loved. My current wedding band orginally belong to MayK (thank you ), was then sold to another PSer (thank you too ) and was finally sold to me which WILL be it's forever home. I have several other pieces that I have bought pre-loved and been very happy with. Some of the pieces I never would have been able to purchase if they weren't pre-loved due to the discounted price. And I actually like it if the piece has history- to me it adds to the emotional value of it.

My younger brother will get engaged soon and he is on a very tight budget so we will definitely go the pre-loved course. I see no issue with it.

I only wish people like Kelpie/ Dreamer and the other Ebay mavens would offer classes on how to find their screaming deals.

 

[Circe]

It's funny ... for me the good stuff might carry over, but not the bad. The Van Craeynest bands I just bought? The seller had a matching man's band. After spending a good while scratching my head and wondering why somebody would bother to remove a quarter-carat stone from a setting that probably cost more than it did, the penny dropped - obviously, they'd removed the center stone because it had sentimental value! They'd probably inherited grandma and grandpa's set and decided to sell it for whatever reason! I was splitting a set of rings that had shared a lifetime of memories!

I felt so weird about it that I actually wasted some energy trying to convince my steampunk-loving husband to at least consider upgrading to a wedding band with flowers on it. They ... look sort of like gears, from the right angle?

Then I noticed that the listing for the men's band said "never worn." So I'm back to thinking broken engagement/divorce, and THAT doesn't bother me one bit, because ... what, like they'd want painful reminders? Nope, they wanted cash, I gave it to them, the rings get to be loved, everybody's happy.

I think part of what helps with that attitude is the fact that *I* have tons of stuff - from exes, from friends, from parents - that either has a little too much resonance for me to enjoy, or that I've just outgrown - and it doesn't have any badness on *this* end, so I'm hoping it won't for potential buyers, either. Though I'm happy to smudge them with sage or whatever would make somebody feel more comfortable. The other part is that I love Edwardiana and Art Deco with all of my soul, and it would be illogical to say *this* used thing has clean karma, but *this* slightly more recent one doesn't ....

 

[JewelFreak]

I love that a piece has a history too. I've bought several things from estate jewelers that I would never be able to afford new. My favorite is my heavy 18K rose gold hand-braided bracelet -- every time I wear it I think of the woman who must have loved it as much as I do. I hope, wherever she is (I assume her kids sold it when they cleaned out her stuff), she knows how much delight it gives its new mother. In a way, I'm grateful to her. Same with other pieces. I hope when I kick the bucket that my things will make some other woman happy.

A friend of mine shudders at the thought of "jewelry someone else wore." Not me, I'm easy!

--- Laurie

P.S. -- I agree about the talented bloodhounds around here who find the fantastic deals they do. How 'bout a lesson or two?

 

[orbaya]

I definitely would! Especially if it was from someone known here on PS. It's a great way to save a few bucks or get more for your money. If I were in the market for an ering right now, I'd be doing some serious stalking around here!

 

[february2003bride]

Thanks, ladies! I'll spill why I'm asking. In January I bought from a seller on ebay (richardallen, very reputable) a halo setting and wedding band set that was originally purchased from Jared's. I had already owned the same wedding set years ago (and returned to Jared's- I can't remember why) so I knew with a new head, my diamond would fit it. I had a solitaire at the time and thought it would be fun to go back to a halo until I wanted to really shell out the moolah for a more permanent setting and/or if I would get to upgrade my diamond soon (.80 carat that I wish was bigger). Anyway, won the auction, took it to Jared's, confirmed it was theirs (they still sell the same set) had the rings unsoldered, polished, plated, new prongs put in the halo, my diamond reset and voila- a brand new looking set!

So all these months, I've loved wearing the halo set, especially after wearing a plain solitaire and plain wedding band for a while, the extra bling has been fun! So much so, that I have completely fallen IN LOVE with these rings! I knew I would like it but these rings were going to be "temp" rings. And while I'm still hoping to some day upgrade to a fancy shaped, larger diamond, we have 3 kids (so 3 college funds), a home we're remodeling, and vacations we are planning, that funneling money to a diamond upgrade has fallen to the way side. And that's ok. Life is good and good things are going on.

So my closest friend is the only one besides DH that knows my rings are from ebay. I told her the other day that I was thinking that these rings were IT (and this discussion came up because she just bought an expensive pre-owned watch on ebay). As in, unless some financial wind fall happened (not likely), that I just adored these rings and had no plans to change them. I've looked at what feels like hundreds of settings, new or pre-loved on ebay, DB, and LT, and while there are some that I've really liked, none have made me want to buy and go through the process and expense of resetting my diamond. Her reaction? This can not be and I should really think twice about that. That while she loves my rings (and she's not jealous- her set is gorgeous and she's 100% happy with them) they are USED. And a woman in her mid-30's should not settle for a USED wedding set. That there is history with the rings (and I don't know that history, since it came from richardallen) and that if I loved this set so much, I should go buy it new from Jared's directly.

The cost of this set new at Jared's? $1800 plus the cost of a new head (most likely), the cost of setting it, and tax. I paid $400 for the set from RichardAllen, and another $150 for the new head, unsoldering, polish and plating. Jared's even went so far as to offer me the warranty on the set I bought from eBay (I declined). I distinctly remember back in January being THRILLED that I got such a good deal (again, frugalista, here!) and that it would be a fun set for a while.

So now I've got this small nagging voice on my shoulder saying, not to love these rings as they are used, from ebay. DH thinks I'm totally crazy for letting BFF's conversation bother me. He loves my set, I've since added another diamond band (coincidentally, brand new but from ebay, lol), so I've got a lovely stack set going on, and he is THRILLED that I've been quiet for months now about changing my set.

So it makes me feel better that there are a few ladies on PS that buy from ebay without any problems Thanks!!

 

[Circe]

I think your friend sounds judge-y and illogical, frankly. Is she downing her own used purchase in this way? No? Then methinks she might be the sort of person who enjoys spoiling other people's pleasure, for whatever reason - attention, schadenfreude, malice, whatever. Your husband is right: don't listen to her.

 

[february2003bride]

I think your friend sounds judge-y and illogical, frankly. Is she downing her own used purchase in this way? No? Then methinks she might be the sort of person who enjoys spoiling other people's pleasure, for whatever reason - attention, schadenfreude, malice, whatever. Your husband is right: don't listen to her.

Circe-

She's really not. She is someone who is genuinely a good natured person who is genuinely happy for others. Her tone wasn't mean, but insistent that a mid-30's woman not have a used wedding set. So I don't want to focus on my friend, but rather that my set's pre-owned from ebay, and have others bought used from there. But my friend really is a good person.

 

[maccers]

I'm sure your friend is super nice but I definitely disagree with her. Like Circe, I don't understand her 'logic' on this topic, probably because it's not logical but emotional and a belief based on who-knows-what. You got a fantastic deal and you should relish in it. She probably wouldn't be saying this if you had bought an antique/vintage set from the 1920s or something but, really, the premise is similar. I know it's hard to disregard these types of comments sometimes but I think you should continue to feel thrilled about your find and the fact that you've found "THE" wedding set, many people can't say that. Good on you.

ETA: I've bought pre-loved jewellery and my deals make me feel like I"m wearing something special.

 

[Kismet]

You've worn the ring for a while now. When does it stop being 'used' and just become yours? Personally, I think it would be a waste of money to spend an additional 2k to get the exact same ring.

 

[february2003bride]

You've worn the ring for a while now. When does it stop being 'used' and just become yours? Personally, I think it would be a waste of money to spend an additional 2k to get the exact same ring.

Hm, Kismet, VERY good point. DH would say the minute I paid through paypal, but I felt like it was *mine* when I picked it up from Jared's and it had MY diamond in it and fit MY finger perfectly.

 

[february2003bride]

I'm sure your friend is super nice but I definitely disagree with her. Like Circe, I don't understand her 'logic' on this topic, probably because it's not logical but emotional and a belief based on who-knows-what. You got a fantastic deal and you should relish in it. She probably wouldn't be saying this if you had bought an antique/vintage set from the 1920s or something but, really, the premise is similar. I know it's hard to disregard these types of comments sometimes but I think you should continue to feel thrilled about your find and the fact that you've found "THE" wedding set, many people can't say that. Good on you.

ETA: I've bought pre-loved jewellery and my deals make me feel like I"m wearing something special.

Thank you, Maccers! And thank you, Circe!

 

[Circe]

Circe-

She's really not. She is someone who is genuinely a good natured person who is genuinely happy for others. Her tone wasn't mean, but insistent that a mid-30's woman not have a used wedding set. So I don't want to focus on my friend, but rather that my set's pre-owned from ebay, and have others bought used from there. But my friend really is a good person.

Okay, fair enough - I still think her position doesn't make much sense, and shouldn't spoil your pleasure in a great set that you got for a steal. I actually love the pieces I got for a fraction of their price MORE, not less: it eliminates the guilt of frivolity.

And who has the money to throw away on buying a perfectly good item all over again for ... what, mind cleanliness? Jared takes returns and exchanges! The "brand new" one could have a past, too. Anybody who's that concerned about the life their stuff led before it came to them should go all custom, all the time.

 

[february2003bride]

The rings in question (I apologize for the crappy iphone pic)

Jared halo set (pre-owned from ebay) - top and middle rings, with a Scott Kay eternity band on the bottom (new, from ebay). I'm not sure I'm keeping the SK band yet, but for right now, I'm having fun stacking it!

 

[february2003bride]

Circe-

She's really not. She is someone who is genuinely a good natured person who is genuinely happy for others. Her tone wasn't mean, but insistent that a mid-30's woman not have a used wedding set. So I don't want to focus on my friend, but rather that my set's pre-owned from ebay, and have others bought used from there. But my friend really is a good person.

Okay, fair enough - I still think her position doesn't make much sense, and shouldn't spoil your pleasure in a great set that you got for a steal. I actually love the pieces I got for a fraction of their price MORE, not less: it eliminates the guilt of frivolity.

And who has the money to throw away on buying a perfectly good item all over again for ... what, mind cleanliness? Jared takes returns and exchanges! The "brand new" one could have a past, too. Anybody who's that concerned about the life their stuff led before it came to them should go all custom, all the time.

Excellent point to the sentence in bold! It never occurred to be that this set could have simply been a Jared return or one that was exchanged for an upgrade! And yes, settings in stores could very well be returns and the consumer would never know!

 

[MichelleCarmen]

Your set is really pretty!

I wouldn't worry about what your friend said...don't let it get to you. If she's not the type to get jealous or any of that, then it probably is a case of her not being a Pricescoper nor use to seeing people buying pre-owned because they found something they love for a better price or because it's an older-cut stone.

I wasn't sure how to answer your question, but then remembered that my wedding ring was from an antique store. lol It was so long ago, that I didn't really even think about it. I thought then my ring was an antique, but I'm now not sure if it is because it's Art Carved brand and all the antique ones look worn down and mine isn't...but, anyway, yes, I would buy a used set if the circumstances were right (and the circumstances in your purchase were right )

 

[orbaya]

The rings in question (I apologize for the crappy iphone pic)

Jared halo set (pre-owned from ebay) - top and middle rings, with a Scott Kay eternity band on the bottom (new, from ebay). I'm not sure I'm keeping the SK band yet, but for right now, I'm having fun stacking it!

Gorgeous!!!

Some people aren't comfortable with preloved jewelry and that is obviously fine. Some people are okay with preloved, but I don't think someone should try to force their own opinions on others. Don't let her make you feel bad about or question your rings! They are beautiful and you love them...that is all that matters. Who knows what stories they hold in the past...you will create your own stories and experiences with the rings. It's just like diamonds. Most diamonds are "used"...they are upgrades, returns, buy-backs, etc. How is this different from settings?

Enjoy them!

 

[JewelFreak]

Those are just beautiful! You know this: somebody, at some time, loved these rings too. That feeling comes with them, passed on to you -- one of the rewards of pre-owned jewelry, to me. They are yours -- with your diamond & a new head & you get a tingle when you look at them. And all that without breaking the bank.

Some folks just need things to be brand new. That's ok, but they should respect that others like the history of items or don't find it offensive that a piece has a history. Yours are not just pre-owned, they are pre-loved & you can tell your friend that.

--- Laurie

 

[baby monster]

Does your friend have issues with used things in general? I have friends that will not have / take / buy used or preowned things including jewelry. It's the principle of having only new stuff.

I have no issues with buying pre-owned jewelry as I don't believe they carry any bad juju. Couples don't get divorced because of their wedding rings. It's typically more complicated.

 

[CharmedOne]

Your ring is beautiful and you got an amazing deal. I know quite a few people who feel the same way and would rather pay retail, so incase someone asked they can say where it came from. Personally I love shopping on eBay. I have several sets that I get to play around with, for the price of what one would cost retail. My latest addiction is vintage pearls. It's is fun for me and I like the thought of recycling and finding great deals. I love the stories too and I have met so many nice people on eBay. When I get tired of something I sell it on ebay and use the funds for something new to me. To each their own I guess. Everybody feels strongly about something. For me, it's if your in a relationship and you are not happy, LEAVE don't CHEAT!!! I could go on with that but back to the topic at hand. If your happy with it, then that's all that matters.

 

[tyty333]

I cant believe you got such a good deal on that setting and I'm totally jealous! If you ever decide you cant stand your
used setting please let me know because I'd be happy to have it!

 

[luv2sparkle]

I think your set is lovely! The only thing that makes bling even better is a great deal you are happy with! I am sure your friend is great but she is a bit deluded if she thinks that because you are a certain age you should be wearing this or that. You are perfectly reasonable and sensible and your bling is awesome. I would ignore what she says completely. A killer deal on your set leaves room in your budget for other sparklies or other things more important to spend your money on. I think you did great, your hubby is lucky to have you, and I dont think there is a bit of bad karma on your set!

 

[manderz]

My wedding band is used form ebay. So is the eternity band that I sometimes wear in its place. Should I go out and spend over $1k each on them again, to get brand new ones that haven't been worn? Heck no! I love them even more because I know that I got an amazing price on them. Spending so much more than I needed to would be MUCH more likely to give me the mind-unclean feeling, than the fact that an inanimate object has a past.

 

[woofmama]

I wore my two used rings today, art deco three stone and baguette band. One was purchased from ebay, the other from Diamond Zone. I don't mind the used factor at all and love to imagine where the rings could have been with their former owners.

I'm sure your friend didn't mean any harm, perhaps she should know that her own diamond could have been set in someone else's ring Gasp The Horror

Enjoy your beautiful set, save your money and never look back!

 

[Snicklefritz]

I'm sure your friend wasn't trying to make you feel bad about your fabulous rings; sometimes people forget themselves and just blurt out what they're thinking in the moment. That said, it's not nice or polite to make someone feel bad about their possessions, especially something you just mentioned being fully satisfied by. All that matters is the value YOU place on it.

I'd do buy preloved jewelry and plan to continue doing so, especially my future ering. I'm a serious bargain hunter

 

[SB621]

Your set is fab!!!!! And it is even better because it cost a fraction of what it normally would have been because you bought it pre-loved!!!! So you are a smart one too boot and you now have even more money to spend on other bling! How is this not perfect?!?!?!

 

[Aerix]

To answer your original question, I would most certainly buy a wedding band, engagement set, etc pre-owned without second thought. I guess I'm pretty practical in the sense that it doesn't bother me if something has come from a broken marriage or has history. I love a good deal and can't resist! I like to think that I add to a piece's history by wearing it and making it mine. Buying pre-loved or on eBay is an excellent way to save money and I agree with everything that everyone has already said. Your halo set is beautiful! Don't listen to your friend, there's nothing wrong with wearing something "used". That said, the only thing I avoid buying that's antique/vintage are lockets with photos and things made out of hair (from circa the Victorian period.)

 

[diamondringlover]

I have not issues buying jewelry from ebay or any used jewelry, mine and my hubbys original wedding bands were purchased used from my cousin..my 20 year upgrade wedding band came from ebay...I love getting a bargain..my thought is why pay retail if you can get something used and alot cheaper and btw your wedding set is awsome!

 

[Sky56]

Used is fab, 'nuff said.