AAHHH! I''m losing it.

[Independent Gal]

I''m usually a pretty even tempered gal. But I just LOST it with, of all people, my DENTIST''S SECRETARY. I think I''ve underestimated how stressful I''m finding the financial situation (the 12K special assessment for my condo association that''s just wiped out everything liquid I''ve saved and then a chunk of the wedding budget on top of that). I thought I was all ''OK, let''s just buck up, smile, and deal with it!'' But then yesterday I went to book a ticket on my airmiles to visit my mom and found out they''d been ''cancelled'' THREE DAYS AGO because of inactivity on that account (there goes another $1000!). So, that I didn''t need. And then today the dentist''s office calls and tells me I owe them $65 from 9 months ago (first I''ve heard of it). $65 people. THIS is not a huge sum of money. But I just LOST it and started yelling at this poor woman about their shoddy accounting practices and how I would NEVER have left a bill unpaid and why didn''t I get a notice about it and blah blah blah.

Poor girl.

I paid her, then I hung up and started sniffling a little.

So I guess I''m pretty stressed about it all after all.

Lesson: if someone is irrational with you, they probably are upset about something completely different. People have always told me this, but this is the first time I''ve been the ''upset irrational person'' and now I see it''s true. I called the lady back and apologized.

It''s going to be OK. I can manage. Reining in the wedding stuff isn''t so bad (though it does make me a little sad). But I just hate that I turned into a b&tch!

 

[Harriet]

Sorry on all counts.

 

[Independent Gal]

Even my posts over on BWW are mean today! ARGH! I''m mean! I don''t like being mean.

Sorry everyone!

Maybe I should go out for cocktails tonight or something.

 

[robbie3982]

Awe, I know how you feel IG. I''m not feeling it right now, but the wedding stress definitely got to me at points in the planning process and I found myself flipping out at innocent bystanders for no reason. I think it happens to all of us at one point or another.

cheer up. We know you''re nice

 

[Independent Gal]

Oooh. Honey got us baseball tickets for this weekend. Now THAT will cheer me up.

 

[Harriet]

IG dear, you''ve never been mean.

 

[musey]

Ohhhh, IG

I know how that kind of stress just seems to blow up out of nowhere! I''m so sorry. Hoping that the baseball game is the beginning of things looking up

 

[TravelingGal]

Well IG, we all have our good days and bad days. I figure if the good days outnumber the bad, we''re ahead....

re: your airmiles, have you bought the ticket yet? If not, please call the airline back. If you have status on the airline, it will be more helpful. Talk to a manager and ask them to reinstate your miles, and you will be happy to fly them again. Or if that fails, ask them if there is an option to pay a small fee to reinstate all those miles. Their options are to a) lose you as a customer and your business or b) make a little bit of money by reinstating your miles and get you back. You have nothing to lose by asking.

I find that two things help me when I''m that stressed and irritatable...a nice glass of wine and something good to read or an early evening walk. Since I can''t really do the former anymore, I''ve been doing the latter quite a bit.

We''ve all torn strips into someone at some point in our lives, so kudos to you for apologizing and making it right. It''s ok to to sniff a bit, or even cry. Most of the time I end up laughing in the middle of crying because really...my life is not so bad that I should be crying. But if I have to have a pity party, I''d definitely prefer to do it in private.

 

[Independent Gal]

Thanks everyone! And T''Gal, a pity party would definitely not be in order. It really WILL be ok. No one has to sell a kidney or anything. I''m not losing my house. I don''t have to CANCEL the wedding. And besides, who can be that upset when there are baseball tickets for Sunday! YAAY! I haven''t been to a game all summer.

I''m going to go to the gym after work and FURIOUSLY work out. I find that calms me down a lot.

As for the airmiles, they canceled them because I completely ignore their airline and haven''t flown with them for 18 months. I''ve become a United gal, and have status with them so they treat me nice, but not these guys. I''d been saving the miles on this other airline until I could visit mom off-peak (the only time it would be enough miles).

I am going to call them back and talk to them about it. I''m sure there''s something I can do. But probably not for this time around. Too last minute.

 

[TravelingGal]

Date: 9/6/2007 4:27:30 PM
Author: Independent Gal
Thanks everyone! And T''Gal, a pity party would definitely not be in order. It really WILL be ok. No one has to sell a kidney or anything. I''m not losing my house. I don''t have to CANCEL the wedding. And besides, who can be that upset when there are baseball tickets for Sunday! YAAY! I haven''t been to a game all summer.

I''m going to go to the gym after work and FURIOUSLY work out. I find that calms me down a lot.

As for the airmiles, they canceled them because I completely ignore their airline and haven''t flown with them for 18 months. I''ve become a United gal, and have status with them so they treat me nice, but not these guys. I''d been saving the miles on this other airline until I could visit mom off-peak (the only time it would be enough miles).

I am going to call them back and talk to them about it. I''m sure there''s something I can do. But probably not for this time around. Too last minute.

Well, if they just expired THREE days ago, who knows. It really doesn''t hurt. I''ve actually ignored United for awhile now. They sent a letter saying my miles would expire this December if I didn''t fly or use them. So I actually lucked out and got two tickets to Hawaii at the saver rates, no less for the exact dates I wanted.

I stopped flying them at almost 300,000 miles...if I had stuck with them, I''d be at a half million by now. Damn, that''s a lot of flying!!!!

 

[Kaleigh]

Hang in there IG!! A nice hard work out sounds like a great idea.

 

[snlee]

After a 12k assessment for a condo, I''d be in a crabby mood too. That sucks. Once I heard about a 65k assessment. That totally blows. How are you suppose to come up with that money!? At least your 12 was not 65? That probably didn''t help but hang in there! I hope you feel better soon!

 

[Independent Gal]

OK, if it were 65K, then I'd have to sell a kidney. But I have another one, right? It's all about looking on the bright side.

 

[Ellen]

Date: 9/6/2007 4:35:12 PM
Author: Kaleigh
Hang in there IG!! A nice hard work out sounds like a great idea.

Or a stiff drink.

Hang in there IG, this too shall pass.

But, cutting back on your wedding makes me sad too. Could you possibly borrow a bit from someone?

 

[Independent Gal]

I''d be all about the stiff drink... if I could afford the booze!!!! WAAAAAAAH

Now THAT''S sad.

 

[Skippy123]

Oh no Snleel and IG; I hope your day gets better!!! Hang in there.

 

[Ellen]

Here.

 

[wolftress]

Poor IG. I''m glad your FI got you baseball tickets to take your mind off the stress. All the best, and here''s hoping you win the lottery or something similar

 

[scarleta]

Go out tonight and start brand new tomorrow.Sorry, I feel for you I also lost the points due to inactivity..Good way for them to get your points.Just have fun tonight...

 

[Independent Gal]

Well, FI (who''s not as broke as I am!) just went to buy us a bottle of scotch. Could be a long fun night!

 

[Gypsy]

Honey I''m sorry about your assessment and the wedding cut backs, and I know what you mean about hating that a situation makes you act out of character and snap. But as TG pointed out, kudos for owning up to it and apologizing! You''re a great, and warm hearted PSer, and sweet to boot, so keep that in mind and don''t beat yourself up about too much anymore.

Enjoy the booze, enjoy the night, and unwind as much as you can. ((HUGS))

 

[diamondfan]

You are never mean, and things can get to you and add up til BOOM. You lose it, and not at the person who really deserves it. Plus a lot of the time there is NO person to blame specifically, it is just stress and crap and it piles up on you.

I have had a couple of really stressful things happen in the last month or so, that just occured and have wreaked havoc in my daily life, and I was ticked off, but realized at the end of the day that no one was hurt and it was all fixable, so that did help. A bit. But boy I really lost it a couple of times, when someone got in my way. I am not proud of it, but I was so ticked at everything going on that I could not take another minute.

It will all be fine, these annoyances will be settled, and you will be able to laugh...maybe. But just tell yourself that you ARE nice and kind and that it all works out in the end!