WHAT is going on with my family?!?

[mela lu]

for what it''s worth, from my own experience, we are never given more than we can handle. Once the fog clears, you are going to look back at this horribly rough patch and think "MAN I''m good! Look at what I dealt with?!" This may not be of much comfort, but chalk it up to ''character building'' ...not that you don''t have enough character already!!

The resiliance of the human spirit is remarkable. Hang in there Indy.

 

[Independent Gal]

Thanks for the support ladies. I actually feel like I''m coping pretty well. A little tense, but I''m staying upbeat and things.

So, mom came out of the surgery, and it was indeed a malignant tumor. The surgeon is confident he got all of it, and estimates it was stage 2. They have to decide about follow-up treatment, but if it was stage 2, with radiotherapy the survival rate is over 90%. So good odds. We''ll know more in a couple of days.

 

[KimberlyH]

IG,

Just wanted to send some more support your way. I''m so sorry there are so many difficult situations you are facing, all at once. My best to you and all of yours.

 

[ladypirate]

Just wanted to send more good thoughts your way--I''m glad the survival rate is so high and it sounds like they caught it early.

 

[Dreamer_D]

Well, it would have been better if it was benign, obviously, but 90% odds are pretty darn good too, so that''s great news! Hang in there kiddo, when do you fly out there?

 

[Independent Gal]

Thanks, Guys. I''m really doing OK, because I had mentally prepared myself for this. But my step-dad seems to be a WRECK! Poor guy. He is so reliant on my mom and he loves her soooooo much. I think he just can''t imagine living without her. Poor guy. But mom will pull through! Oh yes! I''ve been texting with him all day in a jokey way to keep his spirits up. Modern technology is great, isn''t it?

DD I''m heading out next Tuesday. That''s when she''ll come home from the hospital (they had to break her breast bone, so it''s kind of a long recovery time). She won''t be able to do much and will need the help and the company more at that point than when she''s still in hospital.

 

[Delster]

Oh my goodness Indy you've been dealing with so much. I'm so sorry to hear that your Mom's surgery showed up malignancy but at the same time it must be such a relief that the survival rate is so high. I will be thinking of her and sending healing vibes and prayers.

And don't forget to take care of yourself in the midst of all this

 

[anchor31]

I''m glad to hear that the surgery went well. My mom had a stage 2 tumour as well, which is why she went into chemo instead of radiotherapy. I know what you mean about your step-dad having a hard time... It''s so hard on the husbands because they usually rely on their wives for support when something happens, but when their wies are sick most of the time they just don''t know who to rely on. I''ll keep praying for you all!

 

[Dreamer_D]

Date: 7/8/2008 11:37:34 AM
Author: Independent Gal

DD I''m heading out next Tuesday. That''s when she''ll come home from the hospital (they had to break her breast bone, so it''s kind of a long recovery time). She won''t be able to do much and will need the help and the company more at that point than when she''s still in hospital.

Ouch! My grandma had her breastbone cracked too when she had open-heart surgery about 10 years ago and it was a painful process. The recovery from that may take some time, and she may feel her chest is a little tight for a long while after from the scarring, but that''s a small price to pay for lifesaving surgery!

You mentioned she will have radiation... does she need chemo too? When will the radiation start? Radiation is not too bad, my grandpa went through it a few times and it mostly makes you really really tired... it sounds like it feels a lot like being, oh I don''t know, 6.5 weeks preggo

With family giving her so much support she should do really well! How long will you be able to stay with her?

 

[robbie3982]

I''m so sorry that it turned out to be malignant!

. The survival rate does sound very promising though and if radiation is all she''ll need from here out, it sounds like this surgery might be the worst of it and that''s already over!

I''m sending good vibes your way for a quick recovery for your mom.

 

[sbde]

aww IG, just wanted to send my thoughts and support your way. i hope you and your family can get through all this together and everything works out well.

don''t forget to take care of yourself through all of this..at times we just want to help others out but right now the cub needs you too!

 

[iheartscience]

I''m sorry to hear about all the problems with your family! I hope your mom (and everyone else, of course!) is a-okay-that''s so scary but it sounds like she''s well on the way to recovery and you seem to have a great attitude about it. PS dust heading your way!

 

[hairgirl95]

Hey Indy--glad to hear she came out of surgery okay, and hoping that Radiation takes care of everything post-op. Sounds like she has a great prognosis. I am keeping all of you in my prayers and sending good luck wishes your way. Not to be too intrusive, but how are YOU doing? You mentioned the pregnancy may not be going so well? I have been there sweetie--and I have my fingers crossed and sending "sticky" dust to the little one. Keep us posted. You are in my thoughts.

 

[Independent Gal]

Thanks everyone for your concern, good wishes, and for sharing your stories. I spoke with my mom on the phone today and she sounded great. Full of fun, very alert. She is recovering quickly and has already got up to move around a little (carefully).

Anchor, it's funny how you and I were just talking about how it happens to everyone and everything turns on a dime, and only about a month later, it was my mom too! Knowing of so many brave ladies like your mom and my friend who just recovered from breast cancer (age 30!) is very inspirational at times like this.

To answer your questions:

DD, I'll only be able to stay for about 10 days, since we are moving soon afterward. I'll try to go back if mom has to have chemo. Otherwise, I'll see her again in the Fall.

hairgirl, thanks for your concern and support. I was having daily spotting on and off for the first three weeks, including bright red, so it took a lot of effort to keep from becoming too upset or worried. I'll know tomorrow whether everything is progressing as it should.

SBDE, I'm still trying to take care of the Cub as best I can! I'm working very hard at keeping calm using exercise, deep breathing, positive self-talk (or whatever you want to call telling yourself that things are going to be OK and looking on the bright side), and lots of snuggles from DH. I think that's the most important thing I can do for the Cub (other than keeping up the vitamins and healthy eating and stuff). The Cub doesn't need to deal with my stress, so I have to keep my stress under control. The thing that really scares me is that my mom is SOOOO invested in this Cub. She's so excited and it is what is making her stay positive. If something happened to the embryo, I actually think that the worst of it would be mom not having this to look forward to.

She also has told everyone.

Including her staff. But I had to forgive her, since she's lying in the hospital with a scar right the way up her chest!

It's funny, I was talking to my brother yesterday and he was all "Well, at least there's scotch!" And I was thinking "Geez, what I wouldn't give for a scotch!!!!" What a time not to be able to have a good stiff drink.

teehee.

 

[jas]

Indy, I just saw this. Know that we''re all "here" for you. Stay strong. Hugs!

 

[cellososweet]

i''m so sorry that you have so much on your plate. Your such a good daughter texting back and forth with step-dad to keep his spirits up. Modern technology is great. Having parents that can actually use it is better. Haha Hang in there hon and let us know how things are going. ((hug))

 

[tiffanytwisted]

Indy-Just wanted to let you know I am thinking about you. That''s a lot to deal with but it sounds like you are doing well. Amazing what a little humor can do for you, huh? I''m hoping your mom has a quick recovery!

 

[katebar]

Indy just to let you know I ''m thinking of you and sending positive vibes to you and your family. The strategies you are using to get through this are awesome and are the ''gold standard'' for anxiety reduction. Well done

.

 

[diamondfan]

Just wanted to know how things were going...hugs to you.

 

[AGBF]

I am sorry to read about all your troubles, IG. I, also, have had a laughable number of them at once recently. (Like having to euthanize the dog while my daughter was in the hospital after making her first suicide attempt in January and then having her make her second attempt when my mother died in late May.) All I can say is that you should keep posting here...and that I admire your attitude. I will be looking forward to reading tomorrow about how the pregnancy is going. All my good thoughts and prayers will be with you.


Hugs,
Deb

 

[Gemma12]

Indy, I'm sorry about the diagnosis. You sound like you are doing all the right things to look after yourself and the cub. Big hugs and you'll be in my thoughts.

 

[hairgirl95]

Good luck tomorrow--sending you lots and lots of good luck for your appointment. I am sure the cub is going to be just fine!!

 

[happy in love]

Indy- My heart goes out to you and your family. I''m sorry you are having to go through all of this, hang in there. (((hugs)))

 

[Kay]

Indy, I just saw this thread. I am so sorry you and your family are having to go through all of this right now. I''m sorry to hear your mom''s tumor was malignant, but it sounds like the survival rates are very good and she has a good attitude, which helps a lot with recovery. It sounds like your family is very supportive and resilient. Try to do whatever you can to take care of yourself, as well as your family. Sending hugs and sticky vibes your way.

 

[princesss]

Oh, Indy, I just saw this post. I''m so sorry that all of this is happening at once. Lots of hugs and dust heading your way.

 

[Skippy123]

Indy, I am sending you a giant hug and I have you and your family in my prayers. You are a wonderful friend her on PS; I can tell you are so giving and have a giant heart, sending lots of love and strength your way during this time.

 

[Miranda]

Big hugs Indy!

 

[Independent Gal]

You are all so kind! I am very touched.

Well, for those of you who don't hop in to look at the Pregnant PS'ers thread, we had some VERY good news today to cheer the family up.

IT'S TWINS! Two nice strong heartbeats. Not just a Cub but a pair of Cubs! We should have guessed! Lions and bears usually have at least a pair, so why we thought we could just have one Cub. Well now, that's just silly.

My mom is over the moon and that gives her something really nice to cheer her up. Plus her incision is healing up really well and she can probably go home a couple of days early.

 

[aprilcait]

What fabulous news. Congratulations!!!!

 

[chizzy1982]

IG - I''ve been following this thread and just wanted to say how sorry I am you are going through all this but also CONGRATULATIONS on your cubs

. Hope you and them are doing well.
I''m glad your mum is making a good recovery - has she been given any do''s and don''ts from a therapist? If not and you want any info/ advice just ask - I''m a senior physio in cardiac and thoracic surgery

Hope things continue to get better for you

Take care