chemgirl
Ideal_Rock
- Joined
- Sep 16, 2009
- Messages
- 2,345
Hi newlyweds! Our wedding was in November and I haven't stopped by this board yet!
I'm having a hard time transitioning from a "that is mine and don't touch my stuff" to a "this is ours" mentality. Has anyone else had this issue?
We lived together before marriage, but at that time we still had our own property. For example, it was my car, my computer, my camera, my ipod etc. and he had his own. Now that we're married I'm having a hard time seeing things that I saved for and worked hard for as "ours". Especially when he breaks them or messes them up, lol.
This all sort of came to a head today and I had a bit of a mini freak out. I have an imac and dh uses a macbook for his home business. He likes how my imac is faster, so he asked if he could use it while I'm at work. Cool, fine, no problem. However, I didn't realize that he would have to encrypt it and then reformat it. He assumed that my data, pictures, and music were backed up so it wouldn't be an issue (he called me while I was at work and asked if I usually back up my files...I was busy and just answered "yes" without thinking about why he would be asking). Well some of them were backed up, but not all of it. To make matters worse, the pictures that weren't backed up were saved on my camera's sd card. He saw that the sd card memory was overkill and replaced it with a smaller one. He used the larger sd card to store his music instead (after transferring the pictures to the now reformatted computer). So now 6 months of pictures are gone! (including honeymoon pics). He took my car out of town today so I haven't really talked to him about it. He has a habbit of eating saucy things in my car and dripping sauce between the seats. I know he's going to get home, I'm going to find McDonalds bags, fries, and sweet and sour sauce all over my car and just lose it. In his defence, he does clean it up, but I love my car and it annoys me to see it trashed!
I just want to scream "DON"T TOUCH MY STUFF!"
Has anyone else had any issues with sharing things that belonged to them before the marriage? Any tips on how to deal with it?
My main issues are with the car, the computer, the camera and personal items like my phone and ipod.
I'm having a hard time transitioning from a "that is mine and don't touch my stuff" to a "this is ours" mentality. Has anyone else had this issue?
We lived together before marriage, but at that time we still had our own property. For example, it was my car, my computer, my camera, my ipod etc. and he had his own. Now that we're married I'm having a hard time seeing things that I saved for and worked hard for as "ours". Especially when he breaks them or messes them up, lol.
This all sort of came to a head today and I had a bit of a mini freak out. I have an imac and dh uses a macbook for his home business. He likes how my imac is faster, so he asked if he could use it while I'm at work. Cool, fine, no problem. However, I didn't realize that he would have to encrypt it and then reformat it. He assumed that my data, pictures, and music were backed up so it wouldn't be an issue (he called me while I was at work and asked if I usually back up my files...I was busy and just answered "yes" without thinking about why he would be asking). Well some of them were backed up, but not all of it. To make matters worse, the pictures that weren't backed up were saved on my camera's sd card. He saw that the sd card memory was overkill and replaced it with a smaller one. He used the larger sd card to store his music instead (after transferring the pictures to the now reformatted computer). So now 6 months of pictures are gone! (including honeymoon pics). He took my car out of town today so I haven't really talked to him about it. He has a habbit of eating saucy things in my car and dripping sauce between the seats. I know he's going to get home, I'm going to find McDonalds bags, fries, and sweet and sour sauce all over my car and just lose it. In his defence, he does clean it up, but I love my car and it annoys me to see it trashed!
I just want to scream "DON"T TOUCH MY STUFF!"
Has anyone else had any issues with sharing things that belonged to them before the marriage? Any tips on how to deal with it?
My main issues are with the car, the computer, the camera and personal items like my phone and ipod.