Will I ever decide????(any diamond psychologists here?)

[diamondseeker2006]

Well, my diamond ring came today. My husband is out of town so I can''t post pictures tonight which is one reason I am not posting on SMTR. It is a H&A, GIA Ex cut, 1.44 ct. H VS2. It''s in a 6 prong Tiffany setting, and it is beautiful. But....I am not sure it is THE one. It is sort of maddening not to be able to look at more than one stone at a time to compare! I guess I really need to go on a field trip (as my little girl would say) to one of these vendors!

The diamond is very sparkly and I am now sold on the H&A issue (good, one thing resolved). My main qualm is that the table is 54%. That looks a little small to me, probably because my current diamond has a table that is too big. I realize that 99% of the people in the world would not have the slightest idea about table size! Only you on PS can appreciate the dilemma!

I was able to take it a little while ago to a retired jeweler to look at. I had him look at the stone and give me his opinion before showing him the certification. He told me it was a well cut stone, good color (he estimated G without looking at master stones and it is graded H), the inclusions are minor and near the edge where they are slight even with magnification. I think I am okay with the inclusions, although I think I''d really be more content with even higher clarity. But, he said this table size is fine, but that he prefers 56-58%. He agreed with the GIA certification. He told me to avoid EGL certifications (which I already knew, but I appreciated him telling me).

When I look at the diamond, I wonder how much better can they be? Is it worth it to keep looking for the "best" one? Oddly, even though the first diamond I looked at was a 1.66, this one still looks large to me at 1.44. I am even thinking I could go down to a 1.3 and maybe up in color and clarity. But ordering diamonds to look at and then return is a little tiresome, plus it makes me feel so bad to do it. I hate to make all the vendors mad at me.

Then I wonder, is there a perfect stone for me or will nothing ever measure up??? Am I being too picky??? Help...I need a diamond psychologist!!!!!

 

[Dee*Jay]

Diamondseeker, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! Except for the lucky few PSers who have somehow managed to find their perfect stones, we are all sitting around wondering the same types of things. Don''t worry, we''re here for you!

 

[Dancing Fire]

i love small table diamonds with high crown,they suppose to bring more fire

but less white brillance.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Date: 5/11/2006 8:22:46 PM
Author: Dee*Jay
Diamondseeker, YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! Except for the lucky few PSers who have somehow managed to find their perfect stones, we are all sitting around wondering the same types of things. Don''t worry, we''re here for you!

Oh, thank you for saying this!!!! Maybe we can have a support group within PS! LOL!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Date: 5/11/2006 8:23:01 PM
Author: Dancing Fire
i love small table diamonds with high crown,they suppose to bring more fire

but less white brillance.

Okay, look at these stats and tell me what you honestly think. It''s a little deep and the table is small. I wonder what I would think of it if diamonds didn''t come with numbers?

1.44 ct.
H, VS2
depth 62.0
table 54
pol EX
sym EX
Fl none
7.23 x 7.28 X 4.5
GIA cut grade Excellent
crown angle 34.5
pav angle 40.8
girdle med. faceted

HCA ex, ex, ex, vg, total 1.4 excellent

 

[belle]

there is a perfect diamond for you out there, for sure. i know you know that it''s not just the table, or even depth that can make a diamond look good (or great!) but the combination of all of the angles and facets working together that make the difference. i''m not trying to say that diamond buying is all about the numbers, but the differences in these factors do have quite an impact on the overall performance and personality of each diamond. there is a combination that is right for you! don''t ever feel like you are putting the vendors out by looking at more than one stone. internet vendors are especially aware of the fact that the majority of their customers will never see the (very high $$) item before purchase. that is why they offer the 100% return period. use it. don''t hesitate sending a diamond back that does not just make your heart jump when you see it, because that is exactly how you should feel.

do you have a hof or other branded h&a dealer near you?

 

[dragongem]

Hey I''ve been searching for the perfect diamond for the past month thinking what it would take to just satisfy me. The more I learn the more I am picky about the one diamond. But no matter what, I am sure you''ll find the "ONE" someday!! My BF teased me because he knows I wouldn''t be able to tell the difference but in my mind because I know, it makes that much of a difference. You are spending this much on a diamond, find the one you want!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Date: 5/11/2006 8:28:59 PM
Author: belle
there is a perfect diamond for you out there, for sure. i know you know that it''s not just the table, or even depth that can make a diamond look good (or great!) but the combination of all of the angles and facets working together that make the difference. i''m not trying to say that diamond buying is all about the numbers, but the differences in these factors do have quite an impact on the overall performance and personality of each diamond. there is a combination that is right for you! don''t ever feel like you are putting the vendors out by looking at more than one stone. internet vendors are especially aware of the fact that the majority of their customers will never see the (very high $$) item before purchase. that is why they offer the 100% return period. use it. don''t hesitate sending a diamond back that does not just make your heart jump when you see it, because that is exactly how you should feel.

do you have a hof or other branded h&a dealer near you?

Thanks, Belle. I feel like crying because I wanted to LOVE this stone completely! I even let them set it because I was fairly sure I''d be keeping it! I do really like it, but I want to really love the ring I will wear for the rest of my days! (Maybe I will love it eventually?)

I am meeting Tacori E-ring and Princess V in a week for lunch and shopping and there is supposed to be a jeweler that carries HoF in the mall where we are going (there is also a Tiffany''s...so these are not the typical "maul" jewelry stores!). I am not sure whether we will go there are not. I know it would be good if I could see some diamonds with varying ideal numbers. But that takes some time with a vendor to look at stones and certs and I hate doing that in a store when I know I will not buy there.

Of course, this stone does look great, brilliance-wise. It''s just that the table looks a little small.

 

[tawn]

Date: 5/11/2006 8:42:58 PM
Author: diamondseeker2006

Date: 5/11/2006 8:28:59 PM
Author: belle
there is a perfect diamond for you out there, for sure. i know you know that it''s not just the table, or even depth that can make a diamond look good (or great!) but the combination of all of the angles and facets working together that make the difference. i''m not trying to say that diamond buying is all about the numbers, but the differences in these factors do have quite an impact on the overall performance and personality of each diamond. there is a combination that is right for you! don''t ever feel like you are putting the vendors out by looking at more than one stone. internet vendors are especially aware of the fact that the majority of their customers will never see the (very high $$) item before purchase. that is why they offer the 100% return period. use it. don''t hesitate sending a diamond back that does not just make your heart jump when you see it, because that is exactly how you should feel.

do you have a hof or other branded h&a dealer near you?

Thanks, Belle. I feel like crying because I wanted to LOVE this stone completely! I even let them set it because I was fairly sure I''d be keeping it! I do really like it, but I want to really love the ring I will wear for the rest of my days! (Maybe I will love it eventually?)

I am meeting Tacori E-ring and Princess V in a week for lunch and shopping and there is supposed to be a jeweler that carries HoF in the mall where we are going (there is also a Tiffany''s...so these are not the typical ''maul'' jewelry stores!). I am not sure whether we will go there are not. I know it would be good if I could see some diamonds with varying ideal numbers. But that takes some time with a vendor to look at stones and certs and I hate doing that in a store when I know I will not buy there.

Of course, this stone does look great, brilliance-wise. It''s just that the table looks a little small.

If you aren''t madly in love with it...you might always have that nagging feeling that it''s not "the one". Do you have a decent return period where you can check out a few others without sending this one back?

 

[Dancing Fire]

i love the H VS2 combo

play around with it under different lighting conditions and see how you feel about the stone.

if you''re worry about the table %

the original Tolkowsky ideal cut had a small 53% table.

 

[dbgaap]

well.... since you asked.... I have also been unable to find a stone that takes my breath away.

The only difference is that I just went ahead and flipped a coin and took one that came closest to my ideal.

(I always have it in the back of my head that this isn''t necessarily "forever").

The other thing I always keep in mind is that it takes a while to get used to a stone and come to love it.
It''s that way for me, anyway.
I basically chose a stone that lacked all the things I dislike ... and we are slowly bonding.

It''s kind of like an arranged marriage.

And I DID have the chance to compare a LOT of stones at the B&M before I chose this one. The only one that took my breath away was a D VVS that was WAY out of my price range. (and I wonder if it was just a head game, anyway)

just playing devil''s advocate here....

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Thanks dragongem and Tawn. Yes, I have 30 days to return. I need to read that policy closely for sure now. That is a good point to hang on to it until I look a little more.

DF, wow, I did not know the original T. cut had a 53% table! My problem is probably more related to not having seen enough diamonds along with having a large table on my old diamond.

 

[Sundial]

I was so excited for you about getting this ring and I am so sorry that you haven''t fallen in love with it. Don''t feel badly though. This is such a big decision and you just want to make sure you get the very best diamond. It is so easy on this forum to get wrapped up in all the numbers and when you don''t have anything to compare it to how can you know for sure? You have a little time so just keep it for a bit. Take it when you have lunch with the girls and see what they think. Try to make time to compare it to some diamonds at Tiffany''s and some Hearts on Fire stones. Don''t worry about putting out vendors, this is their job. Don''t settle for something you aren''t completely happy with.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

dbgap, I'll be in major trouble if I find that D VVS is the perfect stone for me! LOL!

Sundial, I think you are right that it might be good for me to wear the ring the day I meet the other PS girls for lunch and go jewelry shopping. I was originally going to look at eternity bands that day, but it can't hurt to compare the diamond to others then as well. Maybe that is what it will take for me to really know for sure. My daughter thinks it is a little too big! My fingers are close to 5 1/2 and I have been wearing a 1 ct. for 29 years. So the size is an adjustment as well! Maybe I do need to take some time to decide.

 

[MissGotRocks]

The difference between an ideal cut stone and a say 60/60 stone is night and day. Those two cuts provide completely different looks (I''ve had both) and each individual stone has its own personality and sometimes it takes spending some time with it to love it. When you receive your first diamond you are just wowed by it and the fact that you have one. As time goes by, you generally become more discriminating about your own taste.

DF is right - play with it in all different types of lighting situations and by all means compare it to others. While PS provides a wealth of information, I sometimes think that after listening and reading so much you almost expect to open the box and have the diamond talk! Perception vs. reality comes into play. Let it grow on you awhile - you''ll know in time if you really like it or whether you need to send it back and try again.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Thanks, MGR. I think you have a point. I helped my BIL choose a stone from WF a couple of weeks ago, and I guess I had built it up so much that he was expecting fireworks to shoot out when he opened the box! But he did tell me that it began to really sparkle once he put it on her finger! Lol!

I have looked a litte since posting this, and it looks like I''d only get a stone around 1.2 cts. if I went with G VS1 for the same amount we paid for the 1.44 H VS2. In addition, a lot of the WF stones have tables of 55% and some in the 54 range. So maybe this 54 is not all that unusually small.

 

[dbgaap]

It sounds like comparison will help you a lot. All you have to go on is your familiarity with your original stone (which was a 60/60, I take it) and the new stone.

I went through a bit of that, too.
First I went from a 1 carat J to a 1 carat E. The E was a much better cut, it was super white and it sparkled so much- honestly it was almost obnoxious!
The difference between the 2 stones was startling.

I only kept the E for a week and I went back and traded up to a 1.20 G. It''s an AGS0 but it doesn''t throw off sparkles the way the E did.
I wanted a mellower stone, having enjoyed my mellow J.
I just wanted something a little bigger and clearer than the J.


So, I think it is really different with each stone and different for each person.
It''s GREAT that you can take it out, meet with other PSers & compare with Tiffany''s /other diamonds.

I can''t wait to hear what you think!

1.44 sounds very, very nice on your hand!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Date: 5/11/2006 11:03:21 PM
Author: dbgaap
It sounds like comparison will help you a lot. All you have to go on is your familiarity with your original stone (which was a 60/60, I take it) and the new stone.

I went through a bit of that, too.
First I went from a 1 carat J to a 1 carat E. The E was a much better cut, it was super white and it sparkled so much- honestly it was almost obnoxious!
The difference between the 2 stones was startling.

I only kept the E for a week and I went back and traded up to a 1.20 G. It''s an AGS0 but it doesn''t throw off sparkles the way the E did.
I wanted a mellower stone, having enjoyed my mellow J.
I just wanted something a little bigger and clearer than the J.


So, I think it is really different with each stone and different for each person.
It''s GREAT that you can take it out, meet with other PSers & compare with Tiffany''s /other diamonds.

I can''t wait to hear what you think!

1.44 sounds very, very nice on your hand!

Well, you have probably what I should be aiming for. If I do not keep this stone, then I am going to focus on a 1.25-1.30 G VS1. Or I might still consider an H. I''d really be happy if I grew to love this one enough to keep it, though. Maybe I can get some hand shots over the weekend and post them on SMTR. Something will have to improve about my nails before then, though! Lol! I do think I''ll feel better if I can take it next weekend and physically compare it to other stones.

 

[dbgaap]

It would be great if you can post pics!
And like DF said, look at it in different kinds of light. Sunlight should be pretty impressive.

What about the setting? What was your original setting like? I wonder if your simple solitaire makes the diamond stand out and that contrast is throwing you off.

Give it some time and if it doesn''t win you over, then, back to the drawing board!

I gotta say, I am loving my G 1.20.
Not too big, not too small.....

(but I bet I could adapt to a 1.44!!!)

 

[diamondseeker2006]

I really think the 1.44 is an excellent size. But my sisters and sisters-in-law all have about 1 ct, except one has a 1.2 H (which always looked big to me!). It is really weird, but this stone is bigger than I expected. I thought it would look so much smaller than the 1.66 I looked at, but it doesn''t. So I need to decide if I can be really comfortable wearing something larger than my friends and family.

Oh, and the setting is basically the same other than going from 4 prong/yg band generic tiffany to a much nicer platinum 6 prong Tiffany reproduction.

 

[Tacori E-ring]

First of all I am so sorry that you feel let down! I know how long and hard this search has been. I cannot wait to see it! If this isn''t the one, we''ll help you find the one. I am sure PV would not mind a little field trip to diamond''s direct. Besides shopping is SOOO much fun when you are spending someone else''s money

Could it be the setting? I know you have a soft spot for Tacori''s/antique settings so maybe that is why you are disappointed? I can''t wait for the 20th!!! Yay!!!

 

[tawn]

Don''t forget about diamond shrinkage!

That 1.44 will look perfect in no time at all!! My 1.11 seemed big at first, but now it seems puny!

Wear it to Tiffany''s and see how it compares to what you look at there! Mine sparkles like the dickens in there and mine is a J eyeclean SI2 that scored a 1.3 on the HCA...so it''s far from a perfect rock!

Starbucks & Costco are lovely diamond viewing venues as well!

 

[Diam100]

IMHO I have to say you gotta love something your plunking down thousands of dollars to wear. I don't know how you feel but this upgrading thing is a pain in the rear and I am not getting on this merry-go round willingly again (lol). I just don't have the time or patience for multiple upgrades. I mean some ladies love going through the upgrade process but I'm the opposite because I'm mentally tapped out by it.

So, for me I had to love the little sparkly or else it would have gotten the boot back to the vendor. Oh & I wouldn't get worried about calling in stones or returning rings because in the end it's a "business" transaction. Nobody's giving you this for free. As for family & friends I wouldn't worry about that either someone always has an opinion on something - ya know.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Tacori, I really love both the plain tiffany and the Tacori styles, so I need one of each to solve that problem! I am so glad we are going shopping next weekend! It really helps to have someone''s opinion besides the sales clerk!

Tawn, I am a little worried about catching that shrinkage disease

, but I was content for 29 years with my 1.02 and only in some isolated circumstances did I wish it were larger. Most of the people around me have no larger than 1 ct. I think shrinkage sets in more when you are around larger diamonds...or gaze to long at some of the beautiful PS rings! I am one of the small minority here probably who would rather have a higher color/clarity smaller stone than a 2 ct. if the cost were the same.

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Date: 5/12/2006 12:15:24 AM
Author: Diam100
IMHO I have to say you gotta love something your plunking down thousands of dollars to wear. I don''t know how you feel but this upgrading thing is a pain in the rear and I am not getting on this merry-go round willingly again (lol). I just don''t have the time or patience for multiple upgrades. I mean some ladies love going through the upgrade process but I''m the opposite because I''m mentally tapped out by it.

So, for me I had to love the little sparkly or else it would have gotten the boot back to the vendor. Oh & I wouldn''t get worried about calling in stones or returning rings because in the end it''s a ''business'' transaction. Nobody''s giving you this for free. As for family & friends I wouldn''t worry about that either someone always has an opinion on something - ya know.

I would say that I have to agree. I don''t think I am the frequent upgrading type since I have just explained that I was happy with 1 ct. for 29 years! I have other items that I''d like to upgrade in quality, like my diamond studs, but I want this diamond to be it as far as an e-ring diamond goes. This is mentally draining and time consuming!

Thanks to you and all who said it''s a business transaction and I should feel free to order and return.

 

[dbgaap]

I''ll add one more voice to the chorus, "YES! It is a business transaction and feel free to return it".
You are on a fairly tight timeline.

In my case, I happen to work close to a B&M that probably has the largest in-stock inventory within 50 miles (or more). And, their return policy is 100 days!
So I have a lot more leeway than you do. It was no big deal to drive over & return the E. If I have any doubts over the next couple of months, I can go back before July 31 and trade in again. If I pay more, I only pay sales tax on the difference. If I pay less, they refund the money.

After that, I can upgrade, but it would be a deal where I would then be paying sales tax on the entire amount of the new purchase. (if my diamond was 10,000 and I trade to a $9,999 stone- I still pay the frickin $500 in sales tax)

So- take my comments within that context- I realize our situations aren''t the same.
You are right to make double-extra, extra sure about this.

We all know that the high price of diamonds is not due to their absolute rarity. Even the low margin vendors are makign a profit at these prices.
So, if it''s not exactly right, send it back.

Think of this as the process of elimination! With each round, you get closer to understanding what you really want!

Best to you!!!! Post pics if you can, but knowing we are all probably going to gush at how beautiful it is!
And right now, it doens''t matter what we think.
It''s about what YOU think!!
congrats on your upcoming anniversary!!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

dbgap, wow, you have an excellent return policy!!! I thought 30 days was good! I emailed the vendor this morning to ask what else they could get in H&A between 1.25 and 1.4 in a little higher color and/or clarity. We''ll see what they say. There are a couple of possibilities at WF, but the stones have been there awhile, so I might wait until they get some new stones in just to have a better selection. But you are right that I am learning what I WANT through this process. I just haven''t had access to looking at more than about one ideal cut diamond in any one B&M store. I hear that most people are looking for size and do not even ask about cut, and the jewelers are selling far more premium cut stones (or lower) than ideal.

And thanks so much for your good wishes for my ring and anniversary!

 

[ladykemma]

on Pricescope peple are led to believe that there is a holy grail of diamonds -- that the only purdy stones are the tolkowsky perfect "ideal cut" stones. Then they see one and are disappointed.

frankly I like them a little leaky, imperfect, strong blue fluorescent and slightly deep. I like the ones on the HCA chart in the green area above the words "young people"

maybe you like the imperfect ones too? they have character.

you will know it when you see it.

 

[Demelza]

Date: 5/13/2006 10:22:18 AM
Author: ladykemma
on Pricescope peple are led to believe that there is a holy grail of diamonds -- that the only purdy stones are the tolkowsky perfect ''ideal cut'' stones. Then they see one and are disappointed.


frankly I like them a little leaky, imperfect, strong blue fluorescent and slightly deep. I like the ones on the HCA chart in the green area above the words ''young people''


maybe you like the imperfect ones too? they have character.


you will know it when you see it.

I totally agree with this, LK. Before I saw my first Superideal, my jeweler talked about them like they are miracles of science and nature. I think sometimes that happens here on PS too. When I first saw one, I have to say I was a bit disappointed; not because it wasn''t stunning, but because the hype was so great, there was no way it could live up to it. This is not to say that you should love this diamond or that you should just be happy with it despite your reservations. It''s just to say that perhaps seeing a few more well cut stones will help you know what to expect. Maybe this stone is as good as it gets, maybe it''s not. But definitely take the time to find out for yourself or you''ll always be wondering. It would be great if you could take some pics for us!!! Good luck!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Ladykemma, are you the pawn shop diamond expert? I am thinking it is either you or Loreli. But yesterday, I passed a pawn shop and decided to go in for the first time! They had bunches of little diamonds, none good for my ring. But I can see how people could certainly consider getting earring or pendant stones that way.

Let me clarify that this diamond is incredibly beautiful. I think most people would love to have it. I am used to an F color, though, and I am not 100% sure I'll be happy dropping to an H. I think this color in an antique setting would be really nice, but I think I'd prefer whiter for a platinum solitaire. And I'd really like VS1, too, if I can find it.

My husband saw the ring for the first time last night. He was surprised at the size, too. I think these well cut stones just appear larger because they are so bright! He thought the diamond was beautiful but he could tell that it was warmer than my F. If I could find a well cut G that is not as deep as this stone (62), I could practically get close to the same diameter with a 1.33 or so. It is not going to bother me to go from 7.2 mm to 7.1 mm. He said to definitely keep looking until I find exactly what I want. He knows me and realizes I will be sorry later if I don't.