|How can I sit by and watch?||
A close friend of mine is in a bad relationship and doesn't see it. I'll call her - Amy and her partner Josh. Amy, my sister and I are best friends.
Amy and Josh met about a year and a half ago while Amy and her friends were on vacation for the weekend. They met while they were out at the bar. Josh was so infatuated with Amy that he wouldn't let her out of his sight the whole night. Amy and Josh exchanged numbers and dated long distance for a long time. Amy lived 8 hours away from Josh in my hometown. One of the weekends Amy came out to visit Josh she found a spreadsheet with her name among with many other females names, all comparing each other in various categories (intelligence, attractiveness, sex, ect.) Amy never mentioned this to Josh.
Fast forward 6 months and Josh finally meets Amy's family. My sister and I live in the same city as Josh and were home visiting our family which is in the same town as Amy's family. While out at the bar catching up with high school friends, Josh gets mad because Amy is talking to a guy on the other side of the bar. He doesn't confront her but instead to make her jealous, puts his hand down my shirt when she comes over. This was NOT acceptable for me, my Fiance was standing right there and had to say something to him. Or maybe, I have no idea why he did that!
Fast forward to the past few months.. Amy moved all the way out from her hometown to move in with Josh. Josh insisted that Amy delete her facebook account because there were too many pictures with her and other males. Keep in mind that Amy and I went to small schools were the graduating class was only about 15 people, so being friends with guys was totally normal since you didn't have that many people in one class anyways.
In the past when Amy lived at home, when I would come visit, I would see her all weekend long. Since she has been with Josh, she isn't allowed to stay out past midnight, isnt allowed to have anything that attaches her to a past life. For example, my sister lives near me in the same city. Amy and my sister went to a NBA game last week. My sisters company gives away free tickets. Josh was mad that Amy was going to go to the game. Amy took a water bottle from her home and brought it to the game so she would have something to drink. Josh did not see Amy take the water bottle to the game. When Amy got home, Josh questioned at her about the water bottle. Amy couldn't remember where she got it, and thought that it was one she had from high school. Josh made her throw out the water bottle because she "must have had some GREAT times with it."
Now next month, Josh's parents are visiting from overseas and Amy is moving out of the apartment because Josh said it would be best if his parents didn't know they are together. He is making her rent out a room with a friend of his. He also made her change her mail for the month and took her name off their mailbox already.
She isn't allowed to have anything that ties her to her past and has to follow all of these strict guidelines. The last time I saw her, I was at her house getting some clothes she was going to throw away and Josh says that Amy better keep those clothes and not give them to me because she was getting fat again and wouldn't fit into anything she bought recently. She lost over 40 lbs. Josh pushed her to go to the gym 2 times a day. and wouldn't allow any wheat or dairy in there apartment. Amy went shopping once and bought eggs and Josh made her throw them out. Amy is so blinded that she can't see how abusive her relationship with Josh is.
I'm so tired of sitting back and watching all this unfold. Am I overreacting to all of this? Amy doesn't tell me everything that has happened but confides in my sister mostly. Also, Amy is 26 years old. I feel like the things that Josh is making Amy do is stuff that boys do in high school.