Getting both my dogs to get along

[Autumnovember]

Hi everyone!

So I recently started my nursing internship and it requires long hours sometimes. I have a dog that I adopted in 2008 (she is 4.5 years old) that my parents offered to care for while I was in nursing school (1 year). I would see her every weekend and so our 'relationship' and bond never really changed. She is a HUGE people person. Love's mostly everyone that she meets and she is a huge mush!

It was decided a while ago that Layla (rescue dog) would come back and live with me full time when I got myself situated with everything in Jersey. She has gotten very used to having someone around often during the day because my mom is not working.

So I decided that I didn't want her to be lonely at my house during the days that I'm putting in 12 hour shifts.

Enter Pumbaa the English Bulldog puppy. I had always wanted this kind of dog and I know a lot about the breed and their temperament and figured they would end up being really good companions for each other.

Pumbaa is 4 months old and obviously very playful. Layla, on the other hand, is very calm and relaxed. Likes to play sometimes but otherwise enjoys sleeping, roaming the house or backyard, laying next to someone and being pet, and of course....eating.

Layla likes other calm dogs. She hates dogs that antagonize her and she has no problem putting them in their place. She doesn't EVER bite but she WILL snap if she doesn't like something the dog is doing (such as sniffing her private areas )

So, I introduced the two of them. They both did fine, no major fighting or anything like that but I can tell she views him as an annoyance and she gives me stares like "did you really have to bring him into our family?"

She does get curious with him....likes to sniff around sometimes. He does show signs of being submissive. He will "bow" down to her and try to play and she wants nothing to do with that.

They both sleep in my bed. Her spot is next to my head, his is next to my feet. He attempted to get near my upper body yesterday and she snapped at him and made him stay near my feet. Sometimes when she snaps, he gets annoyed and will bark a bit at her but thats it.

She will also snap if he tries to take her toy away while she is playing with it but otherwise, she doesn't mind him borrowing them if she isn't playing with them.

I know this kind of stuff takes time but I really don't want her to resent me or hate me for bringing a new dog into the family. I was really hoping that she would understand that he is a puppy and kind of take on a motherly role. Wishful thinking, huh? I did notice that whenever he is in his crate (which he hates!!!!) and he is barking, she will sit next to him and whimper. Not sure what that may mean.

I'm hoping that as he gets older (and lazier/calmer) she will stop with the snapping and learn to love him. Am I only wishing again?

Does anyone have any tips? I really, really want them to love each other!

Anytime they eat, Layla gets food first, treats first, and anything else.


HAAAALLLLPPPPPP!!!!

 

[lyra]

It sounds like they are doing fine in establishing boundaries, and this isn't something that's likely to change. They should calm down a bit over time, but you will still have to be watchful that one doesn't actually hurt the other.

I don't believe dogs have human emotions. They don't love each other, or resent you. They tolerate each other, and they love you.

I don't have much advice. They still need a lot of your time and attention. Treat them fairly, but remember that you are the top of the pecking order, they are the bottom. All humans are above them. Simple dog logic.

 

[aviastar]

When my husband and I got married and moved in, we each came with an adult dog (6 and 7 years old); very similar in that they met, were fine, established some boundaries, and then proceeded to ignore each other for the next six months.

Fast forward to now- they play all the time! They don't really snuggle with each other- they prefer to snuggle with us, but they are best buds now, always running and romping and wagging tails.

It's ok for your older pup to put the puppy in his place; he is joining her pack and she's the boss! It honestly just takes time and then one day they will be friends!

 

[Joolz]

AN: How long has it been? When our dog that we had since she was a puppy was 3, we brought in another 3 year old female. They never fought, but did both have that look of “why is she here?” After about a month or so they went from napping on their own beds to sharing one, wrestling and licking each others faces in the morning. At the suggestion of a trainer, we did spend alone time training each of them. So while alone with the new dog I was teaching sit, stay, etc, we would still spend alone time with the other dog on new, more advanced tricks so she didn’t feel left out and training is a good time for bonding. You always want the dogs more bonded to you rather than each other.
I did do some reading recently that you shouldn’t “take sides” unless necessary. Leave the dogs alone to figure out boundaries and what is acceptable. Bc even after all this time (7 years later) I am finding that occasionally they will boss each other around for the best side of the bed, who gets to hog the toys, etc. They compete just like sisters!

 

[Haven]

You definitely don't need to worry about Layla resenting you or hating you. She's a dog, and she doesn't think like that. You're interpreting her behaviors and the ways she looks at you as if she were a person, but the good news for you is that she's not a person, she's much better! Dogs don't harbor resentment, they don't hate, they live in the moment.

I agree with Lyra that it sounds like they're just establishing boundaries, and this is a good thing. My mom just rescued a young pup from death row and introduced him to her 10-year-old dog Killian who is the definition of low energy. (We actually say she has *no* energy!) The new pup, Nigel, is bouncy and excited and medium-high energy, and all he wants to do is play. It's been 2 and a half weeks now, I think, and they're already started to get along very well.

I don't know if you're doing this, but my mom was, so I'm going to say that one very important thing to do is to make sure that you are not favoring Layla. This will cause problems, you need to treat them equally.

It's good that you're teaching Pumbaa his place in the pack by having Layla eat first, etc. Layla snapping at him when he tried to move up higher in the bed near you is troublesome--do not encourage or tolerate any possessive behavior on her part. If she does that again give her a firm NO, and allow Pumbaa to come up to an equal closeness near you as Layla.

I'm sure you know this, but Pumbaa sounds like he needs a lot of exercise. You're probably already taking him for long walks, but if you could add play time with other energetic dogs into the mix that would be wonderful for him, and he'll lay off Layla more when he's home if he's expending energy elsewhere. We get my mom's dog Nigel together with our dog Bailee for a play date as often as possible. They tear around the yard together, and then come in and wrestle to their hearts' content. That tires them out enough that Nigel isn't looking to Killian to play quite so much. If you don't have friends with dogs I recommend finding a good place to bring Pumbaa for doggy day care a couple times a week. My sister recently rescued a pup in LA and they've been taking her to day care twice a week so she has time to run around in a play group and socialize with other high energy dogs.

As for the whining in the crate, we've been doing something with Nigel that has worked pretty well. We don't have him go into his crate until he's completely calm, of course. Once he's in we have him sit, and then lie down. This might take some time, but patience is key when training dogs. Once he's totally calm inside, we shut the door, and then we sit in a chair next to the crate and wait until he is totally calm and relaxed before we leave. We don't make eye contact, just sit near him and look straight ahead. The most it has taken for him to totally calm down has been five minutes, which feels like an eternity when you're sitting there, but it's really not long at all. They key is being calm yourself, and just waiting it out.

I know how frustrating it feels in the moment when your household is suddenly unbalanced, but just remember that in a few months this will be a distant memory and everyone will coexist peacefully. We've been at my mom's house every day since she rescued Nigel to help her get him acquainted and trained, and it's a lot of work, but totally worth it in the end.

 

[Autumnovember]

Lyra - you're totally right, I know the snapping that Layla is doing is just her telling him "this isn't ok with me, stop!" Right now, and probably for a while, they will never be left alone together unless one is in the crate. So far, neither has tried to bite the other. It just just barking or Layla barking and lunging towards him a little bit to make him back himself up. I do think dogs can form bonds with each other too. I only say this because of how some dogs react when they've become buddies and then they're separated for whatever reason. They sulk which translates to emotion for me

Aviastar - That gives me a lot of hope! Especially because your dogs were a bit older and I know it can be a bit more difficult when they're older. I definitely know it is going to take time, I guess I just need reassurance that eventually, it will all be ok. My parents haven't been much help with that mainly because my dad keeps telling me that Layla is never going like him, she'll never be happy at my house with him, and a bunch of other BS that he knows pisses me off.

Joolz - SUCH a short amount of time. I got him the 26th of October. 1.5 weeks were spent with the puppy alone because I was in Jersey with him and had no way of getting home. I finally had them meet at the end of last week and they spent two days with me at my parents house. Something came up with work that was unexpected and I couldn't bring both back home. Now I'm at my parents again (came here yesterday and leaving on Sunday) with both dogs. Both will be going back with me on Sunday. I will take your advice of training both during alone time. No taking sides here, I try to be really equal, especially with the petting!

Haven - Phew! I really was starting to think she didn't like me anymore! I think I may be getting something confused - isn't favoring Layla giving her food first, letting her out first, etc.? I feel like I'm making her the priority when I do that and I'm not sure when I should and shouldn't be putting her first before Pumbaa. I let her snap at him while he was trying to move up on the bed because I thought this was her establishing her boundary like "hey, this is where I sleep...you go down there!" My dad actually just came home from work and usually when any of us come home, we sit down on this little seat and Layla will jump into our lap and say hi. Well, she just did that and Pumbaa wanted to say hi too and she wouldn't allow him to do it. She snapped and made him back off. She'll do this while she is next to one of us on the couch and he is on the floor. I had my parents watch him for me yesterday and I had to come home because they were having a bark fest with each other. I told my parents to put the dog on the couch too because he obviously wasn't liking the fact that he had to be on the floor while Royal Queen got to be on the couch. Pumbaa gets good exercise whenever HE is feeling up for it. Bulldogs can be stubborn as hell and I do try to walk him as much as possible but he certainly gets super stubborn if he doesn't feel like going for a walk! I took him to the dog park for a while the other (two hours!) and he got super tired. We have a place by our house thats called Pooch Play that is pretty much a dog daycare. I think he'll be going there often as soon as he is better house trained (I feel like if I take him now, it will mess up his training since they can pee and poop wherever the want there and it gets cleaned up). I also am going to try to take him to my MIL's house more often as she has two dogs there that get along well with him and love to play. The crate idea you have sounds like a good one. I'm going to have to give that a shot. The only problem with that is that I know DH isn't gonna want to be the one to have to do it since the dog goes in the crate before HE leaves for work. I remember training Layla was really difficult for us but it WAS worth it in the end and I'm absolutely keeping that in mind!!!

Thanks so much for the awesome advice, everyone!!! It gives me hope =]

 

[Haven]

Favoring Layla would be doing things like giving her affection or treats and then not doing the same with Pumbaa. When you have Layla eat first and train Pumbaa to wait calmly you are just training him about his place in the pack, not favoring Layla.

She definitely sounds like she's being possessive of you if she growls or snaps when she is sitting on you and won't let Pumbaa come near you. That is something I would nip in the bud immediately. Do not let her sit on or near you if she behaves like that. When she growls correct her, and push her off of the sofa. She should be allowed to sit on or next to you unless you invite her, and of course you won't invite her unless she's calm and behaving herself.

I'm sure you're doing an awesome job! It's tough, especially with a stubborn breed. I forgot he was an English Bulldog, so maybe he really isn't all that high energy! Please share any pictures you have, by the way, if you want to. I love seeing everyone's furbabies!

 

[Autumnovember]

Favoring Layla would be doing things like giving her affection or treats and then not doing the same with Pumbaa. When you have Layla eat first and train Pumbaa to wait calmly you are just training him about his place in the pack, not favoring Layla.

She definitely sounds like she's being possessive of you if she growls or snaps when she is sitting on you and won't let Pumbaa come near you. That is something I would nip in the bud immediately. Do not let her sit on or near you if she behaves like that. When she growls correct her, and push her off of the sofa. She should be allowed to sit on or next to you unless you invite her, and of course you won't invite her unless she's calm and behaving herself.

I'm sure you're doing an awesome job! It's tough, especially with a stubborn breed. I forgot he was an English Bulldog, so maybe he really isn't all that high energy! Please share any pictures you have, by the way, if you want to. I love seeing everyone's furbabies!

Got it! She has stopped sleeping in the bed with me the last two days. I can tell she doesn't like him sleeping there. She is gonna have to get over it - ESPECIALLY when I take her back to jersey tomorrow, where there is no other bed to sleep in (she goes and sleeping with my parents if its not with me).

I started telling her "NO!" when she growls at him for trying to play with toys. She acts possessive over them even if they're not hers. She's learning quickly though which I'm happy about!

 

[webdiva]

What a cutie!

This is totally normal. Our first dog needed to establish boundaries with the new one and we couldn't leave them alone for a while. You've already gotten some good advice and I'd also add that relaxing around them will help A LOT! It just takes time for them to settle in. It's a big change for both of them.

In these early days, wear out both dogs as much as you can. Since you can't exercise a puppy much, try stimulating his mind with games and toy and exploring new things. If both are tired, they'll get along much better.

We usually talk about puppies having a "puppy license", where the older dog gives the puppy some slack and realizes it's just learning. The dog would put up with more and also possibly train the puppy. Our older dog trained the newer one on all the house rules in a matter of days - no counter surfing at THIS house, etc. It was pretty awesome! The best trainer your dog can have is a well trained older dog.

Most importantly - please don't EVER tell a dog NO for growling.

Much like snapping, growling is a dog establishing their boundaries. If you teach them not to growl, they just progress to the next level, snapping or biting, or worse.
Interesting article - which explains how dogs try to warn other dogs when they are setting boundaries - each of these leads to the next one on the list:
http://www.4pawsu.com/understandingaggression.html
" Barking
Growling
Tooth displays of varying degrees
"Muzzle punch" (striking with a closed mouth)
Snapping (without contact)
Biting without injury
Biting with varying degrees of injury

There are many non-aggressive ways dogs attempt to avoid or escape a threatening situation before escalating to aggressive behaviors but too often these early warning signs aren't recognized by most dog owners. "

As an alternative, we had a water spray bottle to spray either one when they were being a brat. We allowed the first dog to establish his boundaries the first few days, and reinforced the pack order. If he went beyond that and was just being a punk, he got sprayed. When both behaved (or did nothing - e.g. not snap at the younger one when she walked by to establish his position), they earned lots of praise and petting. They learned quickly what was acceptable behavior.

It's very, very important that you familiarize yourself with dog behavior and to not assign human emotions/actions to them. There are some great sites online that do this. Here are some fun visual charts that explain common signals:
http://topdogblog1.blogspot.com/2012/04/doggie-language.html
It'll help you reinforce positive behaviors and head off any potential fights (Oy! The fights ours had the first few days! Both are so bossy pants!).

In addition, this trainer has some great articles on training and dog behavior: http://www.suzanneclothier.com/articles

Like I said, it's most important that you relax. The dogs pick up on the stress and feel like they should react. So go grab a cocktail and go snuggle with your pooches!

 

[lknvrb4]

I have no advice because my old dog got along great with our new pup last year. I just wanted to say what a cute dog it is though.

 

[woofmama]

What a cutie!

This is totally normal. Our first dog needed to establish boundaries with the new one and we couldn't leave them alone for a while. You've already gotten some good advice and I'd also add that relaxing around them will help A LOT! It just takes time for them to settle in. It's a big change for both of them.

In these early days, wear out both dogs as much as you can. Since you can't exercise a puppy much, try stimulating his mind with games and toy and exploring new things. If both are tired, they'll get along much better.

We usually talk about puppies having a "puppy license", where the older dog gives the puppy some slack and realizes it's just learning. The dog would put up with more and also possibly train the puppy. Our older dog trained the newer one on all the house rules in a matter of days - no counter surfing at THIS house, etc. It was pretty awesome! The best trainer your dog can have is a well trained older dog.

Most importantly - please don't EVER tell a dog NO for growling.

Much like snapping, growling is a dog establishing their boundaries. If you teach them not to growl, they just progress to the next level, snapping or biting, or worse.
Interesting article - which explains how dogs try to warn other dogs when they are setting boundaries - each of these leads to the next one on the list:
http://www.4pawsu.com/understandingaggression.html
" Barking
Growling
Tooth displays of varying degrees
"Muzzle punch" (striking with a closed mouth)
Snapping (without contact)
Biting without injury
Biting with varying degrees of injury

There are many non-aggressive ways dogs attempt to avoid or escape a threatening situation before escalating to aggressive behaviors but too often these early warning signs aren't recognized by most dog owners. "

As an alternative, we had a water spray bottle to spray either one when they were being a brat. We allowed the first dog to establish his boundaries the first few days, and reinforced the pack order. If he went beyond that and was just being a punk, he got sprayed. When both behaved (or did nothing - e.g. not snap at the younger one when she walked by to establish his position), they earned lots of praise and petting. They learned quickly what was acceptable behavior.

It's very, very important that you familiarize yourself with dog behavior and to not assign human emotions/actions to them. There are some great sites online that do this. Here are some fun visual charts that explain common signals:
http://topdogblog1.blogspot.com/2012/04/doggie-language.html
It'll help you reinforce positive behaviors and head off any potential fights (Oy! The fights ours had the first few days! Both are so bossy pants!).

In addition, this trainer has some great articles on training and dog behavior: http://www.suzanneclothier.com/articles

Like I said, it's most important that you relax. The dogs pick up on the stress and feel like they should react. So go grab a cocktail and go snuggle with your pooches!

I have had a three dog household for many years and have had to introduce new puppies to older dogs several times. I am a dog training/behavior addict and completely agree with all of WebDiva'a recommendations. They will find their way, all dogs do. Your older dog is just teaching the youngster to respect her. Please don't punish her for growling. It is her way of communicating with the little guy. If he had stayed with his mom she would be doing the same at this point.

 

[Autumnovember]

What a cutie!

This is totally normal. Our first dog needed to establish boundaries with the new one and we couldn't leave them alone for a while. You've already gotten some good advice and I'd also add that relaxing around them will help A LOT! It just takes time for them to settle in. It's a big change for both of them.

In these early days, wear out both dogs as much as you can. Since you can't exercise a puppy much, try stimulating his mind with games and toy and exploring new things. If both are tired, they'll get along much better.

We usually talk about puppies having a "puppy license", where the older dog gives the puppy some slack and realizes it's just learning. The dog would put up with more and also possibly train the puppy. Our older dog trained the newer one on all the house rules in a matter of days - no counter surfing at THIS house, etc. It was pretty awesome! The best trainer your dog can have is a well trained older dog.

Most importantly - please don't EVER tell a dog NO for growling.

Much like snapping, growling is a dog establishing their boundaries. If you teach them not to growl, they just progress to the next level, snapping or biting, or worse.
Interesting article - which explains how dogs try to warn other dogs when they are setting boundaries - each of these leads to the next one on the list:
http://www.4pawsu.com/understandingaggression.html
" Barking
Growling
Tooth displays of varying degrees
"Muzzle punch" (striking with a closed mouth)
Snapping (without contact)
Biting without injury
Biting with varying degrees of injury

There are many non-aggressive ways dogs attempt to avoid or escape a threatening situation before escalating to aggressive behaviors but too often these early warning signs aren't recognized by most dog owners. "

As an alternative, we had a water spray bottle to spray either one when they were being a brat. We allowed the first dog to establish his boundaries the first few days, and reinforced the pack order. If he went beyond that and was just being a punk, he got sprayed. When both behaved (or did nothing - e.g. not snap at the younger one when she walked by to establish his position), they earned lots of praise and petting. They learned quickly what was acceptable behavior.

It's very, very important that you familiarize yourself with dog behavior and to not assign human emotions/actions to them. There are some great sites online that do this. Here are some fun visual charts that explain common signals:
http://topdogblog1.blogspot.com/2012/04/doggie-language.html
It'll help you reinforce positive behaviors and head off any potential fights (Oy! The fights ours had the first few days! Both are so bossy pants!).

In addition, this trainer has some great articles on training and dog behavior: http://www.suzanneclothier.com/articles

Like I said, it's most important that you relax. The dogs pick up on the stress and feel like they should react. So go grab a cocktail and go snuggle with your pooches!

I'm taking your advice and trying to be as relaxed as possible around them right now even when they're driving me insane.

We've been playing with them a lot during the day...it seems to be helping and nap time is heavenly I honestly need some time without them though because I have been around them non-stop the last 4 days except to get gas!!

Ah! I think I'm getting a little confused with when to say no and when to let her do the growling. What Haven said made sense about not letting her act possessive so I was stopping her from growling at those times. Should I not do that? What about when she snaps at him when he tries to take her toys? I am definitely going to read that article once I'm finished replying


Can you give me an example of when you would use the spray bottle? I think I'm have a difficult time distinguishing when she is being bratty and when she is establishing boundaries. This is definitely a very new and different learning experience for me!


Thank you so, so, so much!!!!!! Off to read the articles!

 

[Autumnovember]

What a cutie!

This is totally normal. Our first dog needed to establish boundaries with the new one and we couldn't leave them alone for a while. You've already gotten some good advice and I'd also add that relaxing around them will help A LOT! It just takes time for them to settle in. It's a big change for both of them.

In these early days, wear out both dogs as much as you can. Since you can't exercise a puppy much, try stimulating his mind with games and toy and exploring new things. If both are tired, they'll get along much better.

We usually talk about puppies having a "puppy license", where the older dog gives the puppy some slack and realizes it's just learning. The dog would put up with more and also possibly train the puppy. Our older dog trained the newer one on all the house rules in a matter of days - no counter surfing at THIS house, etc. It was pretty awesome! The best trainer your dog can have is a well trained older dog.

Most importantly - please don't EVER tell a dog NO for growling.

Much like snapping, growling is a dog establishing their boundaries. If you teach them not to growl, they just progress to the next level, snapping or biting, or worse.
Interesting article - which explains how dogs try to warn other dogs when they are setting boundaries - each of these leads to the next one on the list:
http://www.4pawsu.com/understandingaggression.html
" Barking
Growling
Tooth displays of varying degrees
"Muzzle punch" (striking with a closed mouth)
Snapping (without contact)
Biting without injury
Biting with varying degrees of injury

There are many non-aggressive ways dogs attempt to avoid or escape a threatening situation before escalating to aggressive behaviors but too often these early warning signs aren't recognized by most dog owners. "

As an alternative, we had a water spray bottle to spray either one when they were being a brat. We allowed the first dog to establish his boundaries the first few days, and reinforced the pack order. If he went beyond that and was just being a punk, he got sprayed. When both behaved (or did nothing - e.g. not snap at the younger one when she walked by to establish his position), they earned lots of praise and petting. They learned quickly what was acceptable behavior.

It's very, very important that you familiarize yourself with dog behavior and to not assign human emotions/actions to them. There are some great sites online that do this. Here are some fun visual charts that explain common signals:
http://topdogblog1.blogspot.com/2012/04/doggie-language.html
It'll help you reinforce positive behaviors and head off any potential fights (Oy! The fights ours had the first few days! Both are so bossy pants!).

In addition, this trainer has some great articles on training and dog behavior: http://www.suzanneclothier.com/articles

Like I said, it's most important that you relax. The dogs pick up on the stress and feel like they should react. So go grab a cocktail and go snuggle with your pooches!

I have had a three dog household for many years and have had to introduce new puppies to older dogs several times. I am a dog training/behavior addict and completely agree with all of WebDiva'a recommendations. They will find their way, all dogs do. Your older dog is just teaching the youngster to respect her. Please don't punish her for growling. It is her way of communicating with the little guy. If he had stayed with his mom she would be doing the same at this point.

Thank God!

Thank you for the advice!!!

 

[webdiva]

I'm taking your advice and trying to be as relaxed as possible around them right now even when they're driving me insane.

We've been playing with them a lot during the day...it seems to be helping and nap time is heavenly I honestly need some time without them though because I have been around them non-stop the last 4 days except to get gas!!

Ah! I think I'm getting a little confused with when to say no and when to let her do the growling. What Haven said made sense about not letting her act possessive so I was stopping her from growling at those times. Should I not do that? What about when she snaps at him when he tries to take her toys? I am definitely going to read that article once I'm finished replying


Can you give me an example of when you would use the spray bottle? I think I'm have a difficult time distinguishing when she is being bratty and when she is establishing boundaries. This is definitely a very new and different learning experience for me!


Thank you so, so, so much!!!!!! Off to read the articles!

Glad it helped!

It's honestly best to keep toys and food out of the mix for the first few weeks and only bring them out when you can supervise them. Once they try to steal each others, you take them away. They'll get the message real quick. Play nice or no toys! Don't leave food out. They get 15 minutes each to eat, then the food gets taken away. Reprimand one if they try to steal the others' food - put them in a down stay and make sure they stay where they are until the other one is done.

Let the big dog establish boundaries for the first few days. Growling is ok. Biting is not. Example of when to use spray bottle: you'll need to get a feel for when play fighting turns into fighting and stop it just short of that. I'll yell "HEY!" and redirect their attention. Or spray the one that's getting out of hand. You'll be able to start to tell when one gets out of hand and needs to be snapped out of it with a nice water spray. It's really just a temporary measure while you're figuring everything out - we don't use it anymore. It's best if they don't see it coming, stealth spraying. It's really just a surprise to try to get them to take a step back and de-escalate the situation and try to continue with getting to know each other. If that doesn't work, put the offending dog in a time out in the bathroom. After a few days, they just get time outs and no spraying.

The most important thing is to reward them with praise for good behavior and you'll have less bad behavior to reprimand. Now is a great time to get the younger one started on puppy classes to socialize him and teach basic obedience, like a sit and down stay.

 

[Haven]

I'm taking your advice and trying to be as relaxed as possible around them right now even when they're driving me insane.

We've been playing with them a lot during the day...it seems to be helping and nap time is heavenly I honestly need some time without them though because I have been around them non-stop the last 4 days except to get gas!!

Ah! I think I'm getting a little confused with when to say no and when to let her do the growling. What Haven said made sense about not letting her act possessive so I was stopping her from growling at those times. Should I not do that? What about when she snaps at him when he tries to take her toys? I am definitely going to read that article once I'm finished replying


Can you give me an example of when you would use the spray bottle? I think I'm have a difficult time distinguishing when she is being bratty and when she is establishing boundaries. This is definitely a very new and different learning experience for me!


Thank you so, so, so much!!!!!! Off to read the articles!

Glad it helped!

It's honestly best to keep toys and food out of the mix for the first few weeks and only bring them out when you can supervise them. Once they try to steal each others, you take them away. They'll get the message real quick. Play nice or no toys! Don't leave food out. They get 15 minutes each to eat, then the food gets taken away. Reprimand one if they try to steal the others' food - put them in a down stay and make sure they stay where they are until the other one is done.

Let the big dog establish boundaries for the first few days. Growling is ok. Biting is not. Example of when to use spray bottle: you'll need to get a feel for when play fighting turns into fighting and stop it just short of that. I'll yell "HEY!" and redirect their attention. Or spray the one that's getting out of hand. You'll be able to start to tell when one gets out of hand and needs to be snapped out of it with a nice water spray. It's really just a temporary measure while you're figuring everything out - we don't use it anymore. It's best if they don't see it coming, stealth spraying. It's really just a surprise to try to get them to take a step back and de-escalate the situation and try to continue with getting to know each other. If that doesn't work, put the offending dog in a time out in the bathroom. After a few days, they just get time outs and no spraying.

The most important thing is to reward them with praise for good behavior and you'll have less bad behavior to reprimand. Now is a great time to get the younger one started on puppy classes to socialize him and teach basic obedience, like a sit and down stay.

Stealth spraying--I love it!

Awesome tips, thank you so much for sharing! AN, I'm mooching tips off your thread, hope you don't mind!

And Pumbaa is ADORABLE. Ohmigosh, that face. THAT FACE!!!!

 

[webdiva]

Glad it's helpful!

I read a TON when we got our first dog and keep up on dog behavior online or on podcasts. This book was very helpful on a broad range of topics : http://www.amazon.com/The-Dog-Bible-Everything-Wants/dp/1592401325/ref=pd_vtp_b_5 Most libraries have it in stock, too. If you need to go in depth, you can probably find a reputable source online on an article by article basis.

The For Dummies book about our dog breed was very accurate, but not sure about the one for your particular breed. Amazon reviews are pretty accurate for books. It helps me understand my dogs and how to motivate them by understanding how their breed approaches things. It also helps me take advantage of their natural instincts to make training easier. My dogs are very much pack animals and learn from each other so I make sure to include the older dog in training sessions with the younger dog. She learns by watching her older brother. Each dog is different but it really explains a lot about why they do things, even in mixed breed dogs.

I've enjoyed this podcast:
http://www.dogcastradio.com/ They cover great topics, for example, how to teach your dog to accept a hug. Dogs don't see hugs as affection, so many dog bites happen when someone hugs a dog.

Any source that uses positive training will be helpful. Not a fan of everything Cesar Millan since some of his techniques are outdated but his general advice to provide exercise, training and a calm, assertive leader are great advice!

 

[webdiva]

Just a couple more things :

-carrying the puppy raises the puppy above the older dog. Dogs higher up in the pack usually sit up higher. As well, the higher ranked pack members get the softer cushier spots. (some people debate if "pack order" stuff is true - but in my experience it totally helps to reinforce natural pack order instincts).
-someone already mentioned to feed the older one first. You may also want to feed the little one in a crate while they get used to each other.
-let the older one out the door first, and allow it to go in doors before the little one

As the puppy gets older and gets into it's "teen" years, you'll then see a power struggle happen again. This is totally normal. Just be consistent and reinforce the pack order they establish amongst themself - even if it seems unfair to you (e.g. if the younger dog ends up being higher in the pack).