Found ring: what would you do?

[Independent Gal]

So, I harassed this poor guy over on Rocky Talky for not attempting to find the owner of a ring he found (which might be fake anyway...but then again it might not, and it might have sentimental value, and it''s gold). I feel a little guilty for being the, as he put it, "morality police," but having lost a ring once myself, it just seems like a ''no brainer'' to me that you''d at least try.

https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/found-a-ring-how-to-spot-a-fake.65586/

I''m just curious what you ladies would do in the same situation. Would you try to find the owner? Do you think he''s right that 90% of people would just keep it?

 

[Catmom]

IG, I saw the Rocky Talky post and I have to say that I agree with you. It makes me crazy when people find jewelry or money etc., and don''t make at least an attempt to find the rightful owner. I think about how I would feel if I lost something. Heck, I''ve gone as far as to turn in a handful of pocket change I found in the parking lot. My thought was what if the person that lost it really needs it? In the case of jewelry, what if it''s something sentimental? Karma has a way of getting even in the end!

 

[door knob solitaire]

You bet I would!! Would and have done everything possible to reunite owners with lost property. I hope others would do the same for me. afterall....You reap what you sow.

Don''t mind telling you it is sometimes an empty feeling though. Some will actually swipe it back as if YOU stole it. Was at the mall once and a lady had a huge package from James Avery Jewelers. I didn''t even know they even had a sack this large to offer. She was ahead of me at another store''s counter. Paid. Left...her package remained. I snatched it and ran after her. Half way down the mall 30 stores...later I Finally found her. She grabbed the thing as if I was a thief. Then she said,

"You have no idea how much money this cost! It contains over 200 gifts for the Church members. It was purchased with church money!"

She turned and stormed off. That was it. Hmmm. OK... well, there is a score card and I got the tally on that one!

DKS

 

[surfgirl]

I know what you mean DKS...One time I went to buy a deli sandwich and I''d just gotten to school from summer break and had hundreds on me to put into my bank account so I asked him if he could break a hundred for the sandwich. He did, and he gave me back $100. in change PLUS some. I walked to the car puzzled and re counted the money and decided the karmic thing to do was go back and tell him...even though I was a struggling college student and could have used a free sandwich. I told the guy I thought he gave me too much change and started to show him and he had a COW. He was totally pissed off and insulted that I would insinuate he couldn''t make proper change. So I left. I didn''t go back. I figured when he cashed out that night and saw he was short, he''d realize he shouldn''t have yelled at me. But I tried...

 

[Independent Gal]

When I was in college, I went through a real crazy absent-minded stage where I kept losing things...like my wallet! People went to unbelievable lengths to return things to me. Someone actually came to my house with my book bag. Someone else got in a huge fight with a security guard at an Opera House about returning my wallet to me safely (long story).

I also found someone's bag of Christmas presents at a mall once. My mom was with me, and we looked through and found a pencil case with the owners name, found her number, called her, and returned the gifts. Just imagine someone has been saving up all year to get gifts. Not everyone has extra money lying around. And this lady was so relieved. She was almost in tears. You never know what someone's situation is.

It just seems like a no brainer. Glad to hear I'm not the only one.

 

[phoenixgirl]

I would totally try to return it. Now, that said, if it was obviously a piece of junk like it sounds like that guy's find probably was, I wouldn't go to great lengths (but I wouldn't keep it either). I've found some pretty crappy fake jewelry in my classroom and I always toss it if nobody comes looking for it. One time this boy found what would have been a 2 carat diamond that was obviously fake and kept insisting excitedly that it might be a diamond. He asked me to put my diamond next to it. I was like, "Sweetheart, take it from me. That is not a diamond. I can tell."

Last night my friend, who has been learning something related to quantum physics about how if you are positive then positive things happen to you (she's required to attend these meetings due to a DUI), was telling us how she went out for a walk and was trying to be positive and then found a $50 in the parking lot. She was like . . . see, positive things happen! I was thinking, "Hmmm, I'm not sure that some poor person losing $50 so you can find it in a parking lot is really an example of positive things happening."

I remember a really sad story from some place like World Market around here. A woman lost her wedding ring or engagement ring and some nice person turned it in to the cashier. Some not nice person witnessed the ring being turned in, then walked up to claim it as her "husband."

 

[strmrdr]

turn it over too the cops and if no one claims it in 6 months then its mine.
Thats what the law says in my state and its the right thing too do.

 

[Pandora II]

I was walking home last year and saw a man, ahem, relieving himself into the bushes beside my apartment block, which I thought was a little strange. a little further on was a pile of things on the ground including a rather intellectual looking book. I thought this was even more odd as the man didn't seem the type!

As I went up the stairs I found a very expensive looking woman's handbag lying open. I picked it up and took it into my flat as the man was now standing staring at me. I went back out onto the balcony to get a good look at him and he ran off.

I went through the bag to see if I could get a name or phone number, and luckily the owner had left a diary which said she was at a book club at a bar just behind where I lived. I called the bar and they said a girl had had her bag stolen and the police were there so I went straight round. On the way I found the book still on the ground, but the other things were gone.

When I got to the bar I found the girl and gave her back the bag - luckily all her cards and keys and drivers license etc were still there - he'd taken the cash, her ipod, mobile and a pair of sunglasses - but the more annoying things to replace were there.

I'll never forget how happy she was to get most of her stuff back. I gave the police a pretty good description but they didn't catch the guy (don't think they really looked!)

She must have got hold of my details because I received a lovely card in the post and a £50 gift token - which was more than generous and very unexpected.

I was furious a few weeks later to find that one of my neighbours had found a makeup bag on the stairs the same night and just given it to one of the local kids without trying to find out who it belonged to. I get very attached to my lipsticks!

I've since returned two other bags to other people - one they'd stolen the poor guys lunch out of it! I'm beginning to think the police will start to suspect me soon! As a local politician I am always giving witness statements in street crime incidents and I tend to intervene quite often - I kind of reckon that I am less of a target because the police would make a huge effort to protect me or investigate any kind of threat; and I hate people being too scared to stand up and speak out against criminals.

I managed to leave my bag beside a bench by the Thames once - had loads of bags and got up and walked off. I remembered about 10 minutes later when I went to use my mobile, which was in the bag! FI and I ran back and it was gone - I had everything down to my passport in it. I got FI to call my mobile and a man answered - he and his girlfriend had found the bag and were taking it to the police station. I was sooooo lucky to get everything back.

If I found a ring in the street, I'd post details on local bulletin boards and get an item in the local papers - they're normally happy to do this kind of thing.

If no-one claimed it? Well, depends if the stones are windowed of course, and would need to be a good cut....

 

[surfgirl]

I found a ring at Pilates last month, man's tungstun wband. Gave it to the gym owner and nobody's claimed it yet. We just laugh about it. How can his wife not notice it missing? Maybe he doesn't care?

I just read that thread on RT and what I would have done was called the mall security offices and general offices/lost and found and told them I'd found a ring, but give no description, and give them my number in case someone calls looking for it. I'd do that so someone else didn't take it.

ETA, IG, I'd hardly call what you said "harassing". I thought the response was a bit off to what you said.

 

[neatfreak]

I would (and have!) left my name and number with the surrounding stores lost and found offices. I would also do the same thing at the local police station.

I would leave no details other than "mans ring" found, or something equally vague. Then I would bring it home and wait for someone to call and identify it.

I think it''s the right thing to do personally.

 

[DivaDiamond007]

I think it depends on the situation. If I''m say in the ladies room in some public place and find a wad of bills on the ground - no wallet, purse, i.d., nothing, then it''s mine. If I''m say in the ladies room in some public place and find a wallet or purse with i.d. or something then it all goes to the police/security/whatever.

If I found some sort of item I''d hold the item and do whatever the law requires to find the owner depending on the item and where it was found. If no one comes forward then it''s mine.

Jess

 

[chiefneil]

I once got someone else''s license plate when I bought a new car - this was through the mail from the dept. of motor vehicles. I called the rightful owner they said they had indeed received my plate, so I made arrangements to drive over and swap plates. Now this was a decent drive, about 40 minutes each way. So I drive up there and give them their plate, but when I asked for mine they replied that they had mailed it back to the DMV when they got it!!! I was so steamed that they lied to me just to make me drive all the way over to return their plate! Sometimes no good deed goes unpunished.

Still, if I did find something of value I''d turn it in. Although generally I''d rather turn it in to someone neutral like a store''s lost&found or the police, rather than trying to track the person down directly.

 

[Nicrez]

I have lost FAR too many things to not put myself in the place of someone else. The most recent was a lovely diamond (tiny little solitaire) and gold ring I bought from TCo as a toe ring. At the airport, going through scan just last month and I took it off. Forgot I even wore it. Left it in the bin, I think, becuase it must have fell out of my purse pocket when it tumbled over in the machine. Never got it back, although they had searched me and I was there for an additional 10 minutes. Who knows what happened...

I have also lost rings and watches. Once i found a wallet in a cab, and went to the person''s office (as their security badge was in it) and returned it. She sent me a lovely set of flowers to my office and movie passes (as we started chatting and told her I worked a few blocks away and where). Basically I have lost more things than most people have for sale at a garage sale just in NYC cabs alone. Truly. Suede gloves and kid skin gloves I bought in Paris (both only a month between!!!), rings, umbrellas, money, etc. I am horrible with cabs. Lost a cellphone in one and it never came back.

How many of these items where reported by me to the proper authority? All except the umbrellas, even though two were Burberry! Then how many were returned or found? 3. Just 3. My keys twice, and a shopping bag I had with a sweater and a book in it. That''s it.

Maybe PS corners the market on honest, because NYC cabs...NO WAY.When I find something in a cab, I call the cab company and I hold onto it. Those cab drivers could care less!!! The likelihood of finding the same cab again is NIL. So I call the parent company and alert them I have it, give them my name, and so far I have had only one call.

Few people know lost and found resources though. And often times, few companies have good coomunication as to who has what and where to go or who to call. Likely because few people bother to look for it. That wedding ring might have been replaced the same day. Tungsten is inexpensive enough that he probably chalked it up to being gone forever, and just proves that most people find things to be mostly disposable...

 

[chiefneil]

I just went and read that other thread. I think IG was right to speak up. I don''t go to church every week, and I don''t run around claiming to have high morals, but I would certainly have turned that ring over to mall security.

 

[asscherisme]

YES I would try and find the owner.

Recently, I found a full wallet in a parking lot just sitting there on the ground. I could imagine a harrased mother dropping it while buckeling her kids into the car. I imagine this scenerio because I could so see myself doing that. I did open it to see if there was anything important and when I saw it with a drivers licence, credit cards and lots of cash my first thought was, how can I get this returned. It ever occured to me for once second to keep the money and I know that woman was freaking out. I decided if I called her home based on her licence she might be freaked out. So I drove to our town police station and turned in the wallet and asked them to find her. The saddest part is that the police officers (after thanking me for bringing it in) were shocked that I actually turned in a wallet with cash! They told me that its a super rare thing and they kept going on about being shocked. I did not leave my name because I did not want the woman to think Iwas after some sort of reward. They police never asked anyway. I teach my kids to treat others as you want to be treated. I''m a big believer in that.

 

[Nicrez]

Date: 7/16/2007 2:41:05 PM
Author: asscherisme
YES I would try and find the owner.

Recently, I found a full wallet in a parking lot just sitting there on the ground. I could imagine a harrased mother dropping it while buckeling her kids into the car. I imagine this scenerio because I could so see myself doing that. I did open it to see if there was anything important and when I saw it with a drivers licence, credit cards and lots of cash my first thought was, how can I get this returned. It ever occured to me for once second to keep the money and I know that woman was freaking out. I decided if I called her home based on her licence she might be freaked out. So I drove to our town police station and turned in the wallet and asked them to find her. The saddest part is that the police officers (after thanking me for bringing it in) were shocked that I actually turned in a wallet with cash! They told me that its a super rare thing and they kept going on about being shocked. I did not leave my name because I did not want the woman to think Iwas after some sort of reward. They police never asked anyway. I teach my kids to treat others as you want to be treated. I''m a big believer in that.

Personally, I would have been more likely to call the woman, and tell her I found her wallet and that I was dropping it in the mail or meet up with her than to go and leave it at a police station. I don''t think i would be freaked out if someone did that for me... Am I strange?

Also, I hate to say this, but don''t assume the police are always honest either. A friend of mine used to be an undercover police officer many years ago. He was in another precinct as an undercover drug felon (handcuffed and the one cop that brought him was the only one who knew he was undercover). Well, he was badly mistreated and his wallet was stolen IN the police precinct by a dishonest cop. The wallet had several hundred dollars in cash as part of the cover. His report detailed that cop''s name and rank, and let me just say his story saddened me and scared me.

I guess I am cynical living in NY, but I would rather get my wallet directly. The more hands that touch anything, the higher the likelihood of things going awry...

 

[oshinbreez]

I''d try to find the owner. In the OP circumstances in the other post, I would have told the mall office and given them my info. I would also have told the police, but would keep the ring in my possession. Then I would have posted an ad in the local paper saying something like "Found ring. Call and identify". I''m sure that would get all kinds of strange calls, but I''d want to make sure that it was returned to the rightful owner.

 

[Harriet]

IG, I''m with you.

 

[Mrs Mitchell]

I guess I''d have handed it into the mall, but then he did say it was closing, I think?

It''s horrible to lose something that matters to you though, so it''s good to hear so many people say they''d try to find the owner. I lost a gold bracelet that was a 21st birthday gift from my grandparents. I''m still sad about that, because it meant a lot to me. It must have come off with my glove when I went into a store, and I did retrace my steps as soon as I noticed, but I guess someone kept it.

I wonder, since thousands of people read this site, whether someone is thinking, gosh, that sounds just like the ring I lost outside mall X a couple of years ago...

If you are, we''d love to hear from you...

Jen

 

[surfgirl]

I just remembered...I was visiting someone in New Orleans several years ago and we were in the garden district or the french quarter, I cant remember, and we went into a jewelry shop and I tried on an earring. I stupidly left my .50ct diamond solitaire on the counter and forgot to try it on, didn''t realize it until I was at the airport and touched my ear and freaked out! I called the shop where I thought I''d left it, and the saleswoman was so lovely. Yes, she had the earring. And she was hoping I''d call her. She ended up Fedexing it to me at no charge. So yes, karma...

 

[Steel]

I would and have gone out of my way to do the right thing, similarly I have also been viewed as an aggressor/nut in doing the right thing

.

Still - do as you would like to be done by.
Even if the world seems full of loonies.

We may all be called to answer ourselves in the end and I for one want to be happy with my actions to the best of my abilities. Then again, it is entirely possible that we may not be called to answer and I would hand over a perfectly sparkly ring when I could spend a lifetime enjoying it sparkly wicked stolen-ness.

We won''t know till its too late....

 

[VegasAngel]

I would have tried to locate the owner with an ad in the paper & on Craigslist. It doesnt matter if the item is "Worth" it or not. In the case of jewelry, costume jewelry may be junk to some, but to the person who lost it, it may be of sentimental value. Maybe their child gave it them, you just never know. I am known to be an extremely honest person when it comes to lost items.

Wanted to add IG that you were very respectful with what you posted in that thread. That person could have very easily left out "The ring is big and gaudy. It's basically a really wide, 10K yellow gold band and there's a round cut center stone (around 1.00 CT) surrounded by 8 smaller round cut stones (at least 1.00 CT total. The surface is probably the size of a nickel. Of course, I figured right away it was fake. It's just too big and ugly not to be. And I figured that if someone spent that much on stones, surely they'd have something nicer than a thin, 10K yellow gold band (the band is really thin/tinny)" Shoot, they should have just left the part about finding the ring out all together especially since they already knew someone would bring up seeking it's rightful owner.

 

[VegasAngel]

Also, I dont know if I originally read this story on here or on Fox News, but it is never too late to look for the owner of lost property.

Junk Mail Helps Man Return Wedding Ring Found 40 Years After It Was Lost

http://www.ksdk.com/news/watercooler/hot_topics_article.aspx?storyid=122610

 

[rainbowtrout]

It depends. I find cash on the street I will (and have) grabbed it and kept it! I mean, am I going to ask people, hey is this your (unidentifiable!) cash?

I find a handbag I return it and everything IN it to the owner if at all possible. If I found a ring?? I don't know. It seems like it would be awfully hard to track down the owner. You would have to place an ad with just *enough* info to help the rightful owner realize it is their ring, but not enough to let someone take it who isn't..

I find clothes, I've kept them if no-one claims them. I have a red Burberry raincoat someone left in the dorm lounge for 2 months. Recently a large chain store here put an extra item in my bag, I kept it--I've worked in retail, it's no skin off a big chain's back if they lose things--it's a tax write-off. Small stores, however, will charge the employees.

Then again, I AM the child who fished coins out of the Disneyworld pond....perhaps I am not the best moral compass to ask

(I will never forget my father's disbelief that his goody two-shoes daughter saw zip wrong with this plan to free pocket change)



ETA: from the other end of the spectrum, I had a bag nabbed from me once in JFK--I turned to help an old lady get her bag on the moving train, I turned around and my luggage was gone. A month later after some VERY persistent calling it turns up in some police department. Everything still in it...odd. I guess they thought Arabic textbooks and some Islamic antiques not worth stealing?

 

[Beacon]

I am the opposite of Nicrez; I find jewelry all the time. Much of it there is no way to find the owner. I have found 18K bangles on the street ( 2 occasions), watches, rings. Fake stuff too, including a walloping 3 ct size cz.

I was able to return one incident to the owners. I was in my gym and went to take a shower. Someone had left their rings in the soap holder. These were really nice and big, expensive. One as a large marquise diamond if I recall correctly. There was no way I was going to give them to the girls at the desk. I held them in my palm and called around the locker room to ask if anyone had left their rings. A gal in the hot tub yelped when I called. She described them and I gave them to her. She was so happy!!!

She told me that she probably couldn''t go home if she lost those rings as her husband would be so mad.

I was glad I could help her.

 

[Kay]

I would have called the mall lost & found and told them I found the ring (but w/o a detailed description). I would have given them my office (not home) telephone number so that if anyone reported a ring missing they could call and describe it to me.

I found a wallet in a cab in Oakland last year. I was on my way to the airport to fly home to San Diego, and did not have time to take a detour to a police station. I really didn''t want to take the wallet home with me -- I was worried the owner would be upset that I took it out of town which would delay getting it back to them -- but I just didn''t feel comfortable telling the cab driver I had found it and handing it over to him. When I got home and went through the wallet, I found credit cards and membership cards (and about $80 in cash), but no ID with an address. I called one of the credit card companies and asked if they could contact the owner, and they just didn''t seem to understand the concept that I was trying to return a wallet--they thought I wanted to cancel the card. They of course wouldn''t give me the owner''s info, but I gave them my phone # and asked them to call the owner to notify her I had the wallet. When I hadn''t heard from anyone by the next day, I tried AAA, and they gave me her number. I called and spoke with her husband. She hadn''t noticed the wallet was missing yet, because she had broken her leg. She had taken a cab home, and between balancing the crutches and her other belongings and being in pain, she hadn''t noticed it fall out of her purse and hadn''t left the house yet. I apologized for taking it home with me, but her husband said they were so glad I had done so rather than give it to the cabbie. He gave me his Fed Ex # so I could send it back to them. About a week later, I received a lovely orchid and a thank you note in the mail, which was unnecessary, but very thoughtful. (BTW, the credit card company never gave them my number.)

 

[asscherisme]

Nicrez, I have lived in NY too. And in DC. But now I''m in the midwest (not that people here are always perfect, thats for sure). IN fact, the reason I decided not to call ther person directly was that lately at that poitn I had one too many crazy encounters that I was honestly afraid to call a stranger. But I am certainly not going to feel guilty for trying to do the right thing!

 

[AmberWaves]

I would totally return it, I had my FI's wedding band coming in via UPS. Well, it kept showing as "en route" even past the delivery date, so just kept waiting. Well, one day a man called and said MY empty ring box package was torn open and stuffed inside HIS UPS delivered package, and he saw my phone number on the packing receipt. So someone at UPS stole my FI's wedding band and stuffed in inside some guy's toilet that he had ordered. UPS tried to deny it, but they went to the guy's house and got the remaining carnage from the theft.

So, in short, I'd return it because it SUCKS when you lose something so emotionally and monetarily valuable.

 

[enbcfsobe]

I''m with you on this IG. I guess PS is just too goody-goody a place for some folks. I don''t think there''s one right thing to do, but you do something, make some effort to return the item to its owner. You never know what items are meaningful to people or important to someone''s life in other way...
Not surprising, I suppose, that we''re generally a bunch of goody-two-shoes here -- wasn''t the whole point of PS initially to gather people who didn''t want to be taken with people in the jewelry business who were actually willing to talk straight about what they were selling...?

 

[bee*]

Date: 7/16/2007 12:53:14 PM
Author: neatfreak
I would (and have!) left my name and number with the surrounding stores lost and found offices. I would also do the same thing at the local police station.


I would leave no details other than ''mans ring'' found, or something equally vague. Then I would bring it home and wait for someone to call and identify it.


I think it''s the right thing to do personally.

This is what I would do also