Emerald engagment ring?

[Fireman]

Hey guys,

So here's the thing, I'm going to ask my girlfriend to marry me but I really don't know all that much about rings.

I had in my head I wanted emerald with diamond...
Diamond because its traditional, and I'm a traditional kinda guy. Emerald because she not traditional, and more because emeralds are the exact colour of her eyes. She's got ridiculously amazing eyes and she looks drop dead in anything green.

So I thought it would be easy. But then I told my brother so he could help me choose a ring and he went all Gok Wan on me and told me you shouldn't get a coloured ring because then it will clash with clothes?

And then people say that its quite a fragile stone compared to diamond and that that's not good, soooooo, I don't know.

Its hard to find something like whats in my head as well. The closest is probably this http://www.myjewelrybox.com/?section=item&itemID=15078 but I think that, with bigger diamonds would of looked better, I dunno. Plus It kind of feels cheap I was expecting 500ish and I probably could of gone a little higher


I just, I don't know - do you think coloured stones are not a great idea for an engagement ring? Or should I just go with it?

 

[Niel]

Colored stone rings are great engagement rings! But emeralds are not really the right stone for an engagement ring. They will not hold up to everyday wear.
Sapphires spinels and chrysoberyl are good for everyday wear. Come in green but not the same emeralds green you were talking. Open to other shades of green or other colors?
Has she implied she would like a colored stone ring?

I'm not a huge fan of that ring you posted. I'd be concerned about quality. Your budget is 500 for the whole thing, right?

 

[deskjockey]

I'll let the more knowledgable people talk about the stones you should consider, etc, but will say I wouldn't worry about it "clashing with clothes." If it's special, then that won't matter. And honestly, I can't imagine a stone on my hand being enough to cause clashing angst (then again, I happily mix gold and silver metals on the same hand, and wear a brown belt all the time, even with black shoes, so, you know.)

I think colored stones are totally the way to go, especially on a more limited budget. But you may need to feel her out a little bit. Even with the meaning and reasoning behind choosing an emerald, she may be someone who deep inside really wants a diamond. Does she have any friends you could ask about that?

 

[Fireman]

Colored stone rings are great engagement rings! But emeralds are not really the right stone for an engagement ring. They will not hold up to everyday wear.
Sapphires spinels and chrysoberyl are good for everyday wear. Come in green but not the same emeralds green you were talking. Open to other shades of green or other colors?

Urm, maybe, I don't know.
Like I say the emerald thing was because, that is the exact colour of her eyes and because wherever I am that colour always reminds me of her. When I went to the jewellers that had loads of rings and there were some really pretty coloured stones but just me picking a stone cause I think its a nice colour feels a little like just shooting in the dark cause I don't know what she'd want - in which case maybe id just be better playing safe with a standard diamond?
I'll give the stones you suggested a google though!

Has she implied she would like a colored stone ring?

We've never really talked about rings, the only ring she's ever pointed out to me was about 18 months ago when we we're on holiday it had like a row of diamonds crossing over with a row of like coloured stones - like a rainbow or a colour wheel. And even then she was just pointing into out to me like "isn't that gorgeous" - so I'm thinking she does like coloured stones.
Ring wise though the only ring she wears every single day is like a silver celtic knot, and that's very simple...kinda like http://www.kay.com/images/products/7619/761940206_MV_ZM.jpg - but then I think that's more to do with the fact it was her mums and her mum was Irish.

So short answer to your question - I don't really know

I'd be concerned about quality. Your budget is 500 for the whole thing, right?

I know what you mean.
err....no, i'd go £750. If it were perfect I wouldn't really want to go over that. But i'm flexible on budget basically - but i'm the big spender out of us, she'd kill me if I spent too much.

 

[Fireman]

I'll let the more knowledgable people talk about the stones you should consider, etc, but will say I wouldn't worry about it "clashing with clothes." If it's special, then that won't matter. And honestly, I can't imagine a stone on my hand being enough to cause clashing angst

Thanks! I agree....I think that was just my brother being stupid!

But you may need to feel her out a little bit. Even with the meaning and reasoning behind choosing an emerald, she may be someone who deep inside really wants a diamond. Does she have any friends you could ask about that?

Its hard for me to do it because I would never sit down and talk to her about jewellery so she'd know straight a way something was up. I could probably think of someone to get some info for me.

 

[Niel]

I completely understand what you're saying about an emerald, but sounds like you have the most attachment to the color. Does she feel as strongly about it as you do? Or does she have a different favorite color?

Does she have a Pinterest? A lot of women "like" and "pin" rings they like. Might be worth a look if she has one.

 

[JewelFreak]

If you haven't -- and most guys don't -- noticed what colors she wears most, start watching that, too. It will give you an idea of the colors she likes -- in fact, her favorite colors are pretty easy to work into a conversation without setting off alarms. You can use those as a guide to what gems to look at.

Easy to see why emeralds attract you, but they are 1) expensive for decent quality & lack of problem treatments, and 2) won't hold up to everyday wear. It's easy to chip or crack an emerald & the facet edges show wear in time. Maybe save that idea for a someday anniversary ring she can flash around on special occasions.

Can you find a picture of something similar to the ring she pointed out that she liked?

--- Laurie

 

[Fireman]

I completely understand what you're saying about an emerald, but sounds like you have the most attachment to the color. Does she feel as strongly about it as you do? Or does she have a different favorite color?

Yeah I get what you mean! I'm just trying to impress her you know? She's all about the thought that's gone into a present, its meaning, and that makes it especially hard.

Plus she's always told me she doesn't have a favourite colour (who doesn't have a favourite colour?) she reckons its the same as not having a favourite shape or number - see I don't even think its just me being rubbish at this stuff, she genuinely difficult to buy for.

 

[Fireman]

If you haven't -- and most guys don't -- noticed what colors she wears most, start watching that, too. It will give you an idea of the colors she likes -- in fact, her favorite colors are pretty easy to work into a conversation without setting off alarms. You can use those as a guide to what gems to look at.

Interesting, i'll give it a go!

Easy to see why emeralds attract you, but they are 1) expensive for decent quality & lack of problem treatments, and 2) won't hold up to everyday wear. It's easy to chip or crack an emerald & the facet edges show wear in time. Maybe save that idea for a someday anniversary ring she can flash around on special occasions.

yeah see it will have to hold up to every day use!

Can you find a picture of something similar to the ring she pointed out that she liked?
--- Laurie

Okay - it wasn't quite like this...but im not sure why I think it was probably better quality but it looked a bit like http://img1.etsystatic.com/000/0/6714175/il_570xN.327456953.jpg

 

[Niel]

Well that's nice she doesn't have a favorite color I suppose. Opens it up

So she likes that you put a lot of thought it into her gifts? Do you think it's enough to say you went on a jewelry forum to find the absolute best ring you could find?

I think if you manage to get an outstanding ring for your budget (which is doable) and propose in a thoughtful way that might cover yourself on that.

I would look at her clothes though. Not to match them necessarily but it'll say what colors she likes and she thinks she looks good in. Also notice if they are light or dark colors.

 

[deskjockey]

Definitely enlist a friend of hers to help you out with this.

There's just so much to consider - she liked that rainbow ring, but that doesn't mean she'd like that sort of thing as an engagement ring. It's possible, but you'd definitely want more to go on than that one conversation.

It's just so hard to say what might really excite her - some women love vintage stuff with a history, some love certain colors, some want size, some want modern... It might take a lot of effort and paying attention and being devious (if you want it to be a surprise), but the more you have to go on the more it will show the thought you put in

And, I know it's not an ideal engagement stone, but a shop I like on etsy has this:
https://www.etsy.com/ca/listing/173961074/art-deco-emerald-engagement-ring-with?ref=related-7&ulsfg=true

and I think it's pretty

 

[movie zombie]

my e-ring is an orange spess.
I don't actually think about whether or not it clashes with my clothing or other accessories.
I got what I wanted and it still makes my heart sing.....no matter what color my clothing and/or accessories.

but a color e-ring is not for everyone.
make sure that is what she wants.
take her window shopping.
enlist a friend and/or family.

remember that a setting will probably be also worn with a wedding band.
what looks good as a ring on its own may be difficult to match up to a band.

while emerald is not a good choice for an e-ring have a look at quality tsavorite garnet.

garnets are not great for 24/7 wear. I take mine off when at home. actually, diamonds can still fracture and/or chip so it is wise to remove even that at home.

also, know that color stone shopping is actually more difficult than shopping for a diamond.

good luck!

 

[carmen1]

I agree that Tsavorite garnets are a slightly better option than emeralds but have a similar color, although she'd still need to be careful with the ring and it shouldn't be worn 24/7. Have you considered a ring with a diamond center stone and green sidestones - maybe something perhaps like these:

https://www.etsy.com/listing/929996...yle-diamond-tsavorite?ref=shop_home_active_18
https://www.etsy.com/listing/124509713/vintage-style-hand-made-diamond-and?ref=shop_home_active_16

They could definitely be worn with everything and still have the green accents that reminds you of her eyes (I love this idea by the way, too bad my eyes are brown ).

You could potentially work with a trusted Etsy seller to help you create a unique ring in your price range and that will definitely show the level of thought into the purchase.

 

[chrono]

I'm horrible at this type of thing but wanted to point out that she may not necessarily want a coloured stone ring and a person may not necessarily want their favourite colour as their e-ring stone. I'm afraid you have to do a lot of investigative work to find out what she likes and dislikes.

 

[movie zombie]

I'm horrible at this type of thing but wanted to point out that she may not necessarily want a coloured stone ring and a person may not necessarily want their favourite colour as their e-ring stone. I'm afraid you have to do a lot of investigative work to find out what she likes and dislikes.

I agree.

 

[Fireman]

Wow, you guys are great, didn't expect all tis when I checked back in

I agree that Tsavorite garnets are a slightly better option than emeralds but have a similar color, although she'd still need to be careful with the ring and it shouldn't be worn 24/7.

Just looked that up, definitely seems the kind of colour I was thinking of!

Have you considered a ring with a diamond center stone and green sidestones

I hadn't really, but actually I quite like that idea.
I like this ring but its just about 2 grand to much http://www.etsy.com/listing/117868608/hand-crafted-princess-cut-diamond?ref=sr_gallery_24&ga_search_query=diamond+and+emerald+ring&ga_order=most_relevant&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_ship_to=ZZ&ga_page=10&ga_search_type=all

https://www.etsy.com/listing/124509713/vintage-style-hand-made-diamond-and?ref=shop_home_active_16

That's a nice ring too!

You could potentially work with a trusted Etsy seller to help you create a unique ring in your price range and that will definitely show the level of thought into the purchase.

That's a cool idea - she definitely couldn't say I hadn't put though into that!

 

[Fireman]

So she likes that you put a lot of thought it into her gifts? Do you think it's enough to say you went on a jewelry forum to find the absolute best ring you could find?

I think if you manage to get an outstanding ring for your budget (which is doable) and propose in a thoughtful way that might cover yourself on that.

True True! I sure hope so at least!

I would look at her clothes though. Not to match them necessarily but it'll say what colors she likes and she thinks she looks good in. Also notice if they are light or dark colors.

Yeah I'll try to be more observant!

 

[Fireman]

It's just so hard to say what might really excite her - some women love vintage stuff with a history, some love certain colors, some want size, some want modern... It might take a lot of effort and paying attention and being devious (if you want it to be a surprise), but the more you have to go on the more it will show the thought you put in

Hey feel my pain
No I totally agree, theres an awful lot to consider but I just I want to do a good job you know?

 

[pregcurious]

It doesn't matter what we think. It only matters what she wants. She must have an idea of what she wants. Just ask her very simple questions like:

1) What color metal do you want for your ring (white or yellow)?
2) Do you want a diamond?
3) If it's not a diamond, do you have a specific color in mind?
4) Do you want a solitaire (one stone), a main stone with side stones (like a 3 stone ring), or something else (like the heart ring you posted)?

To understand her style, that is more difficult. The best way to get a feeling for this is to go ring shopping with her. She may like contemporary, classic, vintage, etc.

If she says green, you can try to get her a green sapphire, although sapphires are more muted in color than emerald. There is an example of a big one here, just to show you the color that a green sapphire can have:
http://www.gemfix.com/sapphire_montana.html

 

[movie zombie]

dang, that is a glorious Montana sapphire!

 

[carmen1]

If you don't want her to know you are looking, does she have a close friend or sister that you would trust to find out what she likes without clueing her in?

 

[Starzin]

Fireman does she have any idea this is coming up or do you want it to be a complete surprise? If so, I second Carmen's suggestion about getting a friend or sister to discretely suss her out about what she would like.

If you have discussed it then Preg's suggestions are good. You don't have to give the game away totally - you can still completely surprise her with the ring and proposal

Does she wear any other jewellery? That can often be an indication of the style she prefers.

 

[pregcurious]

Does she wear any other jewellery? That can often be an indication of the style she prefers.

So true. If she only wears one color metal, that is usually a give away that she prefers that metal.

The other thing you could do is present her with a stone, and let her pick the setting herself.

 

[pregcurious]

dang, that is a glorious Montana sapphire!

I covet it, but I don't need a it like a I "need" a different stone.

 

[Bron357]

Hi, I'd ask her mum. I'm sure her mum would be thrilled to help out ensuring you buy what your beloved would love. I have an emerald ring but only dare to wear it occasionally. Seeing a woman hit her hand hard on a table (by accident) and break her emerald stone in half (literally) makes me nervous to wear it. Sapphires and rubies are the more durable color stone alternative. Many gems can come in a rainbow of colors but if your budget is $500 you might find best value in a pre loved cast ring rather than selected stone made into a handmade setting. Just my opinion. And a bezel setting gives a softer stone good protection. While I'm new to joining this site I've read many many questions etc and the knowledge and helpfulness of other subscribers is amazing. You will get great advice and fantastic suggestions and options from them. Good luck on your exciting journey - which just starts with the ring

 

[LD]

You're in the UK aren't you? The Gok Wan reference was a big clue!!!!!

Be careful if buying stones/settings from abroad because you may have to pay huge import duties. Why not have a word with Diamond Geezer in Birmingham. As to speak to Luke and he'll help you find something.

 

[minousbijoux]

You're in the UK aren't you? The Gok Wan reference was a big clue!!!!!

Be careful if buying stones/settings from abroad because you may have to pay huge import duties. Why not have a word with Diamond Geezer in Birmingham. As to speak to Luke and he'll help you find something.

I had to go look that up - and here I was thinking it was like the Wu Tang Clan!

 

[sapphiresal]

The conversation might have moved past this point, but...

I think the green stone for her eye colour is a really lovely idea, and I followed deskjockey's link to Etsy. That is a beautiful ring (but sadly now reserved) and what a lovely shop (thank you deskjockey!).

Anyway, how about this one? It is a very nice green tourmaline in a sweet setting AND the vendor is in the UK and has a 7 day return policy. If you're good to go, you could order it, get it on Monday, pop the big Q and still have a couple of days to deal with it if she doesn't like it. No pressure...

But I think its lovely. And I think Gok would agree.

http://www.etsy.com/ca/listing/1702...maline-diamond-ring-in?ref=shop_home_active_6

 

[deskjockey]

The conversation might have moved past this point, but...

I think the green stone for her eye colour is a really lovely idea, and I followed deskjockey's link to Etsy. That is a beautiful ring (but sadly now reserved) and what a lovely shop (thank you deskjockey!).

I LOVE that shop. I found a ring there I basically want to copy for my demantoid, but I have her favorite-d now so I can see her updates. She finds some really beautiful things

 

[minousbijoux]

Hmm, we last heard from the OP on the 14th. I hope he wasn't scared away...