Wedding ceremony questions

[princessplease]

FI and I are having a ceremony at the reception location, and are having a friend or family member as our officiant. I don't know anyone who was married in this way, and I've never been to a wedding where there was no priest/rabbi/minister/etc as the officiant.

So how does one plan a ceremony like this? What order should things go in? What needs to be included? If you wrote your own, how did you come up with your own ceremony? Did you use a template, or just wing it? I'm so lost with this, lol. Any information on these kinds of ceremonies is much appreciated. I am extremely grateful for any help with this. Thanks!

 

[SassyB]

I''m doing the same thing! One of my best friends got ordaine online and will be marrying us.
There is a book called "Weddings from the Heart" that we read over to get ideas. There are a few ceremony suggestions you can go by. OR write it yourself! Who cares what the order is.....

 

[jstarfireb]

I did this! I looked up wedding ceremony examples online and found some great things, and then I just edited them how I saw fit. Here''s what I included:

Processional
Opening words
Reading #1
Vocal solo
Reading #2
Officiant says it''s time to get married (I didn''t have her say anything generic about marriage; that part was redundant to me after the readings)
Vows - adapted from ones I found online
Ring exchange - used the Unitarian wedding vow, because I am one
Declaration of marriage - used the Apache Marriage Blessing (it''s all over the Internet)
Kiss and leave

The whole thing was 15-20 minutes, short and sweet! Hope that helps.

 

[DMBFiredancer]

we''re doing a beach wedding - friend is officiating.

our order is:
processional

welcome - officiant

reading - sister

vows - us

rings- us

blessing - officiant

recessional

short and sweet!

 

[princessplease]

Date: 7/21/2009 3:18:23 PM
Author: jstarfireb
I did this! I looked up wedding ceremony examples online and found some great things, and then I just edited them how I saw fit. Here''s what I included:


Processional

Opening words

Reading #1

Vocal solo

Reading #2

Officiant says it''s time to get married (I didn''t have her say anything generic about marriage; that part was redundant to me after the readings)

Vows - adapted from ones I found online

Ring exchange - used the Unitarian wedding vow, because I am one

Declaration of marriage - used the Apache Marriage Blessing (it''s all over the Internet)

Kiss and leave


The whole thing was 15-20 minutes, short and sweet! Hope that helps.

Awesome!!!! Thanks so much jstar!!! How did you come up with your readings and opening words?

 

[ficklefaye]

we hired an officiant, but she has left the structure of the ceremony to us, i''m still looking for ideas on my end too, but i really think it''s however you want your ceremony to be, i think you should make it something that is meaningful to you, FI and i were debating whether our guests will get confused because it''s not the traditional church ceremony, but hey, we''ve always been different

 

[honey22]

Google Non religious wedding /ceremonies or something like that, and you will get heaps of ideas. Depending on what city or country you live in, they may be certain words you have to say legally in order for your marriage to be legal and valid. Doesn''t your friend who is officiating have a folder of examples or something? Our celebrant gave us a folder of 80 pages to choose words and verses etc from, we narrowed this down to about 10 pages. They are so many different wordings, but the general structure is usually the same.

Ours is:

introduction
brides entrance
monitum (required by law in Oz)
giving away
reading #1
the asking
vows
exchange of rings
declaration of marriage
the kiss
reading #2
signing the register
closing

 

[cocolaw]

we are doing the same thing! we are having my brother marry us, and so i put some things i liked together online. we are making a few changes-we might change the wedding prayer to the lord''s prayer and we will be reworking our vows. i used the find and replace function on word, so that is why my name is uppercase, but fiance''s is lowercase...oops!! here it is:


We welcome you today to the marriage of mr coco and coco. We are met together in the presence of their dearest family and friends to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony. This is indeed a joyful time, in which we witness the love of these two people expressed in the joining of their lives together.

Let us pray: Lord, behold our family here assembled.
We thank you for this place in which we dwell,
for the love that unites us,
for the peace accorded us this day,
for the hope with which we expect the morrow,
for the health, the work, the food,
and the bright skies that make our lives delightful;
for our friends in all parts of the earth.
Amen (WEDDING PRAYER By Robert Louis Stevenson)

Mr coco... coco... Marriage is a covenant of faith and trust between a man and woman requiring openness of life and thought, free from doubt and suspicion, and commitment to speak the truth in love to one another. Marriage, also is a covenant of hope that endures all things, and in which both husband and wife commit themselves to interpret each other''s behavior with understanding and compassion, and to never give up trying to communicate with each other. Marriage, therefore, is a covenant of love in which both husband and wife empty themselves of their own concerns, and take upon themselves the concerns of each other as they love and care for one another.

And now a reading from coco’s cousin: " The love of God, Unutterable and perfect, flows into a pure soul the way light rushes into a transparent object. The more love we receive, the more love we shine forth; so that, as we grow clear and open, the more complete the joy of loving is. And the more souls who resonate together, the greater the intensity of their love for, mirror like, each soul reflects the other." (from The Divine Comedy by Dante)

Mr. coco... coco...
Do you both come freely, and without reservation, desiring to commit yourselves to one another in this covenant of marriage?
Both: (We Do)

Mr coco, will you have Coco to be your wedded wife, to live together in the covenant of marriage? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?
Mr coco: (I Will)
Coco, will you have Mr coco to be your wedded husband, to live together in the covenant of marriage? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?
Coco: (I Will)

Who gives Coco to be married to Mr coco?
Uncle coco: (her mother and I do)
(Uncle Coco steps back, releasing Coco’s arm. Coco and Mr coco join their arms together.)

Today, we are fortunate enough to witness our dear friends, Mr coco and Coco, make a statement. Today, before us and before the eyes of God, they are stating that their love is a bond. It is a bond that tells the world, that their love is worthy of marriage. That their love is a bond that will last a lifetime.

Mr coco, Coco….From this day forward, you will no longer be two individuals in a relationship. You will become each other''s family. And unlike your blood relatives who you acquired by chance or perhaps in a plan of a higher power, you have chosen each other. The bond you enter into is an expression of your love and your will.
Today, each of you are stating to the world, that you are putting your partner''s needs before you own. That you are committing to the growth and well-being of your partner. That you are pledging your love and support for each other at all times. That under all circumstances, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health, in good times and in bad, you will put each other''s needs before your own. These are not things that can mandated by the state. These are not things that can be dictated by legal contract.... These are pledges you make in your hearts, with your hearts.
If anyone knows any just cause why you may not be lawfully joined together in matrimony, let them speak now or forever hold their peace.

The rings please. Mr coco and Coco please face each other and join hands. The unbroken circle of the ring represents many things. It is a symbol of eternity because there is no beginning or end to it. It is a symbol of the pledges you are about to make to each other and the strength of your commitment. It is a link in the spiritual chain that binds you together.

Mr coco, take Coco’s left hand in your left hand, and with your right hand, place the ring on her finger. Repeat after me.
With this ring I give myself to you.
Coco, take Mr coco’s left hand in your left hand, and with your right hand, place the ring on her finger. Repeat after me.
With this ring I give myself to you.

You have entered into the holy covenant of marriage, held sacred by almost all religions since the dawn of time. May your joy last forever and your disappointments be few.
By the power vested in me and in the name of the State of California, I hereby pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.

 

[cocolaw]

i wanted to write our word for word what my brother will be saying, have him practice, but put the reading in a pretty book or something. i''m not letting him get creative with our wedding ceremony

 

[princessplease]

Thanks for sharing!! You did a great job writing the ceremony.