So we''re making HIM an e-ring too...thoughts?

[blueroses]

I figured this deserved its own thread so it didn't get buried in the thread about our seeking custom setting quotes for my e-ring linky

I think my sweetie sums it up best in a message he sent an old friend of his:

"Oh - here's something you'll probably get a kick out of. Leave it to me to refuse convention in ridiculous ways. A couple of nights ago I mentioned it seemed a bit unfair she was going to get this beautiful (and expensive) present to represent our promise to each other, and I got crap out of it. The stone we have is in a current setting which contains four little baguettes we're not going to use and which have no trade-in value. So we started talking about an engagement ring for *me*, too! Something masculine, of course, and which could be worn next to my wedding band."

We have four baguettes to work with--two smaller than the others. He had this great brainstorm about using them for HIM and said, "Is that crazy??" And I thought NO! He also liked the idea of his also being outwardly "taken" (just as I will be) once we're engaged. Cute

We really want matching wedding bands, so this way they'll match all the more since his will now be thinner to accomodate being worn next to an e-ring.

Lousy scanner picture of the bags in their existing setting attached. Our thought is to:
1) scatter the baguettes evenly around the perimeter of the ring (like N/S/E/W) alternating among the big and small ones
2) Place all four in a line, alternating (big-small-big-small, or small-big-small-big)
3) place all four in a line going big-small-small-big, or small-big-big-small

We are leaning towards option #1. He plays guitar, so it'd have to be low-dowm/half-round as opposed to squared off. Anything with an edge could catch. WG or plat (whatever we do for my e-ring. WG is cheaper, and that matters, so...that might be what we do.) Shiny, not polished. We'd want the stones to sit flush in the band--not come out at all. One jeweler called it "burnished" which was a new word for me. 5mm width. He'd then wear this e-ring next to a plain 3mm wedding band (mine will be a plain 2 or less mm plain band.)

I'll post some pics of comparable-ish things we've seen.


Thoughts?

 

[blueroses]

Kind of like this, but with the bags going long-ways along the band, and spaced out at 90 degree angles from one another.

 

[blueroses]

This one is similar--with princess cuts. You get the idea.

 

[gemnick]

Date: 5/12/2009 9:51:13 PM
Author: blueroses
Kind of like this, but with the bags going long-ways along the band, and spaced out at 90 degree angles from one another.

Great idea - and this is a great ring. Best wishes to you! -Gemnick

 

[blueroses]

Thanks, Gem--it''s nice to hear that!!

It''s been really exciting to do this together....and I love that he will get something tangible and timeless too.

(Hey, when did I break 3,000?!)

 

[honey22]

I think it''s a fabulous idea - no reason why the men have to miss out hey?

 

[2.5rs]

I (am a guy) and I think it''s a little silly. That being said if he wants it and you like the idea by all means go for it!

 

[jstarfireb]

I think it''s a fab idea. I tried to get my guy to go for a wedding band with a tiny little diamond, and he would have none of it. So it''s not for all guys, but since yours is up for it, great!

 

[Imdanny]

I think it''s a great idea.

The only caution I have is that if the custom ring is 5 mm (I''m assuming it has to be 5mm?) and the wedding band is 3mm, that totals 8mm- that''s a lot. I''d just say make sure you two consider 1) does he want to wearing 8mm of rings (I wouldn''t), 2) can the 5mm be made 4mm, 3), can the 3mm be a 2 or 2 1/2mm? Just some thoughts.

Do it!

 

[Kaleigh]

Love this idea!!!!

 

[Circe]

Fantastic idea, and actually the tradition in Sweden. Your design idea sounds nifty!

 

[blueroses]

THANK YOU for the feedback, guys! Honestly, I never thought I'd be interested in a diamond in my FH's wedding band (or even considered an e-ring for him....wait! It's a HE-ring!) But the baguettes are so subtle--and would be spaced far apart--that it really intrigues me. (Much more subtle flash and not like--mafia pinky ring, you know?)

PLUS--it's his idea, and we love the thought of both of us using the stones from the previous setting--each wearing a piece of it together.

Good question, Danny. We tried a couple on, and he tried a 3mm and 5mm together and it didn't bother him. But you raise a good point--we'll keep thinking! If they could do a HE-ring in 4mm, that might be better.

Another thing my bf likes this is that we would both be "marked" as belonging to someone--not just ME, like it's some patriarchy ownership thing. (Which, of course, an e-ring isn't, but you get the idea.) If we're both going to wear wedding bands, then it's a negligible difference to both wear e-rings...and I love the look of two stacked bands. Certainly not for every guy, but I'm touched that mine wanted this.

Other design thoughts?

 

[Kelli]

What a great idea! Btw I just adore your e-ring! And I like the first men''s ring you posted. Very cool! How sweet that he wants to be outwardly "taken" too!

 

[blueroses]

Thanks Kelli--did you mean the e-ring idea? We don''t have it YET, but....feedback=GOOD!

(Circe, that''s cool about Sweden.)

thanks honey, jstar, danny, kaleigh(!), gem too!

 

[Lovinggems]

How about setting the baguettes burnished in a square pattern?

 

[Imdanny]

Ok, I don''t know if this is one of the ways you described possibly doing it but, just an idea:

You could rotate the big one sideways. I think that would be perfect for that stone. Then, the width of this stone could determine the size of the ring (5 mm, 4mm, 4 1/2mm, whatever it turns out to be with a little metal surrounding it for protection).

Then, you could line the remaining for in twos (the two that are on each side):
a) the same way they are now
b) the two on each side, side by side, the largest one first (closest to the big stone)
or c) the two on each side, in the same direction as the center stone (rotated) first the bigger one, then the smallest one, repeat on each side.

I think (think, it''s hard to know, I''d have see a sketch) I like the idea of the center stone rotated with the side stones arranged as in b)

Just some thoughts!

 

[Imdanny]

Date: 5/13/2009 12:10:16 AM
Author: Circe
...actually the tradition in Sweden.

Could you tell us more about this please? I''ve never heard of this. I have heard that most women in Sweden want 1/3 ct diamonds of high quality (although don''t quote me). Thanks.

 

[Circe]

Date: 5/13/2009 12:26:23 AM
Author: Imdanny

Date: 5/13/2009 12:10:16 AM

Author: Circe

...actually the tradition in Sweden.

Could you tell us more about this please? I''ve never heard of this. I have heard that most women in Sweden want 1/3 ct diamonds of high quality (although don''t quote me). Thanks.

My pleasure! My husband is Swedish, and as I understand it, in his tradition, both members of the couple, once they decide to wed, choose matching engagement bands (which tend to be plain metal), which are then joined or replaced by fancier wedding bands w/diamonds at the ceremony, basically for the egalitarian reasons which are driving BlueRoses and her FI. (I''ve also heard Swedes joke that this makes sense because this way, no one gets engaged for the bling.

) When my husband and I got engaged, we sort of mixed and matched traditions: I''m the one who proposed, but he didn''t want an e-ring with a diamond; instead, he wanted to get me one. And, in turn, I surprised him with delicate matching braided bands for the two of us to wear during the engagement, which were only retired upon getting married.

I know that my ring, which is pretty much dead-center normal for where I''m from (NY) was a topic of fascination for most of his friends: for a while there, he was known as "carat and a half guy," which sort of cracks me up. I know that all of the jewelry stores that I saw while I was there were selling stones at prices that most PS''rs would think outrageous for the quality: it seems like there''s not really a lot of interest in diamonds over there, so, commensurately, there aren''t too many specialist shops. The one woman whom I met who seemed most interested in diamonds in the abstract, who really wanted to talk color and clarity with me, got her ring from Tiffany''s, I think.

 

[Rhea]

Love it! We didn''t have diamonds or a large budget for either ring, but my husband received an engagement ring. He wears his engagement ring on his right hand and wedding band on his left hand. Both bands are 8mm each.

I really do love it when guys get an engagement ring too!

 

[cindygenit]

Hi Bluerose

It is a great idea! I''m getting a surprise he-ring for my FI

Cindy

 

[Sharon101]

I too think it`s a little silly. But each to their own....and if it makes you both happy, well go for it.

My only concern is that you are spending good money trying to use up some left over diamonds. Not a great recipe for success in designing the best ring possible. Could be spending good money after bad. ie paying for a custom job in order to use some low cost diamonds.

My advice is to first get a perfect design, then see how much it costs. You might end up buying all same size diamonds for this project.

Lastly, couldnt the ring be the wedding ring instead of a 2 ring situation.

 

[bee*]

I know that there is no way that D would want to wear an e-ring but if your guy wants one, then definitely do it. I think that the facets one is my fave.

 

[allycat0303]

Hey Blue!

Love the first facets band you posted. Masculine and elegent. Actually, I don''t find it weird. I have 2 guy friends that had engagement rings (cultural) when they got married the ring became a wedding band. One was Persian and the other guy was Greek, so it''s been done before. I think it''s lovely.

 

[SYC]

I think it''s great! And very neat that your fiance brought it up.

My fiance also has an engt ring, with three little round diamonds in it. He really enjoys it! He has had to put up with some teasing from friends and colleagues, but whatever.

He''s probably only going to wear one ring after the wedding though -- one is platinum and the wedding band will be yellow gold, so what he wears will depend on what watch/clothes he''s wearing.

I like the design of that Facets ring w/ the baguettes!

 

[SYC]

just to follow up, if you''re not crazy about the quality of the baguettes, maybe you should do some research on pricing before jumping in. The custom work could cost quite a bit.

Also, are you sure he wants to wear 2 rings together? If each are 3 mm each, that''s quite a bit of metal to have on the finger! Though I know some people like 6 or even 8 mm bands, so maybe he''ll be fine with that. Just wanted to point out it may get a little unwieldy if he isn''t used to wearing so much on his hand.

 

[girlie-girl]

Date: 5/13/2009 3:37:07 AM
Author: Sharon101
I too think it`s a little silly. But each to their own....and if it makes you both happy, well go for it.

My only concern is that you are spending good money trying to use up some left over diamonds. Not a great recipe for success in designing the best ring possible. Could be spending good money after bad. ie paying for a custom job in order to use some low cost diamonds.

My advice is to first get a perfect design, then see how much it costs. You might end up buying all same size diamonds for this project.

Lastly, couldnt the ring be the wedding ring instead of a 2 ring situation.

I don''t think it''s silly at all, why shouldn''t he have an engagement ring if he wants one?

Also, in her other thread she told us they were gifted to her by her surrogate grandmother (here''s a working link https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/feedback-advice-wanted-custom-engagement-setting-search-for-ec-with-bezel-and-pave.115153/ ). I''m guessing they have sentimental value which is why they are excited about using the stones for both of their rings.

Good luck!

 

[chiquitapet]

Great idea!!!

 

[Sharon101]

Date: 5/13/2009 10:34:26 AM
Author: girlie-girl

Date: 5/13/2009 3:37:07 AM
Author: Sharon101
I too think it`s a little silly. But each to their own....and if it makes you both happy, well go for it.

My only concern is that you are spending good money trying to use up some left over diamonds. Not a great recipe for success in designing the best ring possible. Could be spending good money after bad. ie paying for a custom job in order to use some low cost diamonds.

My advice is to first get a perfect design, then see how much it costs. You might end up buying all same size diamonds for this project.

Lastly, couldnt the ring be the wedding ring instead of a 2 ring situation.

I don''t think it''s silly at all, why shouldn''t he have an engagement ring if he wants one?

Also, in her other thread she told us they were gifted to her by her surrogate grandmother (here''s a working link https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/feedback-advice-wanted-custom-engagement-setting-search-for-ec-with-bezel-and-pave.115153/ ). I''m guessing they have sentimental value which is why they are excited about using the stones for both of their rings.

Good luck!

Hey, I didnt say its silly.....I said its a little silly. To me this means being quirky and off beat and something that others might find amusing.....but in a good way. And i also said that if it makes them happy to go for it. No rule that says you have to follow the herd!

And as for using the stones, I really wanted to add my own experience of being sorry when I tryed too hard to make something old fit into something new. So, what I meant was to maybe use 2 of the diamonds that were the same size and add some more to match. Perhaps I did overlook the sentimental value of the diamonds though and just analysed the cost benefit of the project. If this is the case, I suppose it changes the focus. However, an extra diamond might still be needed to make the ring more balanced.

 

[DiamondFlame]

I gotta agree with your guy on this: she''s getting a fabulous ring and all I got is a bill? Why can''t I get something nice out of the engagement too? Women nowadays want an equal partnership in a marriage - this would make a good start. But no HE-ring for me, I''d rather she gets me a nice engagement watch instead.

 

[sylvesterii]

I haven't posted in ages (alas the thoughts of gems and jewels fall to babies and expenses!), and thought that I'd pop in to see how things are going. Very well it appears.

I believe it is rather common in Finland as well to have his/hers engagement rings. I for one think it is an excellent idea.

Rather than only wearing one of the rings, move the engagement ring to the right hand ring finger after the wedding band is on. I wear a simple titanium band with two silver lines on my right hand, and I really like having a ring on each hand. I like the symmetry.

Also, make sure to check out the mm size on HIS hands. while 8mm sounds thick to many, on a guys hand, that seems pretty much normal to me. My wedding band is 7mm, and actually i think it could be a little larger if I were to design it again. (https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/it-is-now-his-turn.15980/)

I was considering a right hand ring for some time, and went through many design ideas. they were in this thread https://www.pricescope.com/community/threads/is-it-safe.36886/

perhaps some (those that still exist in there) may be helpful as ideas.

In the end I had the stones set into a necklace for my wife. I don't know if I ever posted pictures here. Shame on me if I didn't.