Proposal Advice Needed

[john1003]

I talked to my girlfriends parents and asked for there blessing to get engaged to there daughter. After along lecture they were for the most part excited and positive about it. The only thing is they really want me to ask her in front of the family. Her brother did that last year with his girlfriend and I guess most of there family has done that in the past. I always pictured it as being a private moment and don''t feel to comfortable with the request. They didn''t really demand it but I know they would be hurt if I didn''t do it with the family there. I wanted to ask her this December in Downtown Chicago on a carrage ride and then take her to a nice dinner afterwards to celebrate. Just looking for some advice or opinions on what you would do if you were in my situation. Also, what do you think about me asking during the carrage ride? Do you think it being really cold during a chicago winter would ruin it? Any advice would be appreciated!

Thanks!

 

[jcrow]

the carriage ride would be ideal and awesome!! i don''t know about the weather there, but i am sure you two can bundle/cuddle up.
i wonder there could be a compromise?? what about proposing on the carriage ride just the two of you. then y''all could ride up to the restaurant enterance where all family and friends would be awaiting your arrival? or if it''s too cold, they could wait inside. she wouldn''t be expecting everyone to join y''all- much less the proposal. y''all could all have a nice dinner together to celebrate.

 

[SoonIHope]

Yeah, I agree with jcrow - try doing the proposal privately, and then joining her family for dinner. Then they will still feel involved in the process, but you will get to have a private moment first. Let us know how it goes!!!

 

[Caribou]

I agree. Do the proposal the way you want to do it. Her family will get over it. I would be modified if my boyfriend asked me in front of a bunch of people (although still very happy) I do not like to be the center of attention. Obviously, I don't know your girlfriend but I still say do what's best for you and her...NOT what best for her family since this isn't about them.

Just curious, obviously none of my business. Why the long lecture? It kind of sounds like her family might be a tad controlling? A lecture and then telling you how they propose.

 

[mjboone13]

John.
I agree with the other posts. You should do it privately if that is what you want to do, but somehow work in the family if you can. Like dinner afterwards. I would shy away from the carriage ride though. Living in Chicago I know how cold it is. You can bundle up, but she will probably have gloves on and it might be snowing. But then again, it doesnt matter, she will be thrilled and it will warm her up.

Any other ideas for places? or ideas for dinner?


m

 

[john1003]

Thanks for all the advice! I think I''m going to make it private even though her parents may not be so thrilled about that. I was going to take her to the Signature Room after proposing on the carriage ride. Any ideas on where else to propose if anyone thinks proposing in the cold of winter on a carriage ride isn''t a great idea? Should I just do it at dinner? Before or after we eat? Thanks again!

 

[mjboone13]

I think your idea sounds great. Your family can get to the Sig room and suprise the two of you when you come up. They will still be a part of the night, but you will have your private moment. Have you been to MK on Franklin? It is off of the Mag mile but so much better than the Sig room. But no place can beat the view of the 95th floor and it is right across the street from the carriage rides. So stick with that. Just make reservations.

my advice is: Do what you want to do to make it special for the 2 of you. Consider the families thoughts and opinions, but do what YOU want.

 

[jcrow]

i would prefer a carriage ride proposal over a dinner one any day. that being said- i''ve never been on a carriage ride and it doesn''t get snowy cold where i live.

 

[AChiOAlumna]

DH took me on a carriage ride in Santa Barbara for our anniversary. They had heavy woolen blankets stored in the carriage for us to bundle up in. It was very romantic...I don''t know how that would be in December in Chicago, but if it can be done, it''s very romantic.

 

[pebbles]

The weather can be horrible in December in Chicago one day, then the next day be balmy. It is totally hit or miss.

I say propose in private then meet the family afterwards. When my husband proposed, he did in private then we met his family for dinner. Looking back, I am kind of upset that his family knew all about it and mine knew nothing about it! So my family was obviously not there. We did tell them the next day, but it wasn''t the same. Do you want your family present with hers? Would your family care? Personally, I think proposals should be very intimate and not have to be shared with everyone at that moment unless that''s what the couple wants...

 

[john1003]

Thats true. I heard they have blankets. What do you think about not getting down on one knee while proposing? I''ve never been on a carriage ride but I''m assuming I won''t be able to get down on one knee when I ask her.

 

[AChiOAlumna]

Date: 11/21/2005 5:41:25 PM
Author: john1003
Thats true. I heard they have blankets. What do you think about not getting down on one knee while proposing? I''ve never been on a carriage ride but I''m assuming I won''t be able to get down on one knee when I ask her.

That''ll depend on the size of the carriage...but even if you aren''t on bended knee, you can non-chalantly pull the ring out from under the blankets!!!! What a surprise that''ll be!!!

 

[Erin]

Can you lie and do it in front of the Ps after the private proposal and she''ll look all surprised?

As a last resort of course. Otherwise, yeah um who''s proposal is this anyway?

 

[Caribou]

I think the carriage ride sounds so romantic and even more so if it''s cold because than you can snuggle under the blanket. I say stick with the carriage ride.

 

[pebbles]

My husband did not get down on one knee when he proposed b/c we were sitting in his car. When we got married I asked the photographer to make him get down on his knee and do it then.

I don''t think it''s a big deal if you don''t, and I think it would be very hard to do it in the carriage. There is not a lot of room!