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NEED HELP PLEASE!

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myprincess

Rough_Rock
Joined
Jun 23, 2009
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My girlfriend and I have been living together for almost three years now. I have an excellent relationship with her parents. (Well Kind of) Her real dad is living in Indiana and I have never met him or even talked to him on the phone. Her step dad raised her and is still with her real mom. I know that I need to ask her step dad his permission witch wont be a problem because they always harrass me about a ring! My problem is, the fact that I have never met her real dad and if he finds out some of the other side of the family might find out and spill the beans. I plan on asking the step dad on the fourth of July and I trust that he will keep it quiet. What do I do?
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tlh

Ideal_Rock
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Dec 31, 2008
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4,508
ok. You ask permission w/ both mom and dad (if you wish, have them BOTH out to dinner...), they say yes, get excited, and you enjoy desset... then you say, I am planning on XXXX, so I''d appreciate it if you do not tell anyone as I''d really like for (insert name of future fiancee) to be able to spread the good news. By doing that it will allow you to have the same convo with her bio dad... if you were wishing to do so.

I say this because my situation is somewhat similar. My hubs didn''t ask my dad to keep it quiet, my dad is a huge gossip and told EVERYONE, so when I was trying to spread the news I got a bunch of WE KNOW WE''VE BEEN CELEBRATING. It totally took the air from my sails, because I wanted to pass along the excitement. Also, my BFF her stupid fiancee asked permission during my reception, and her dad, DRUNK, went around and told everyone, INCLUDING MY BFF, "guess what XXX just asked me!!!" he was excited and STUPID... and totally ruined the moment for my BFF, because she was expecting her proposal any day now... but it made me angry, because I actually asked her stupid fiancee to NOT PROPOSE during my reception. Those things ANGER ME ROYALLY... and I''ve been pretty upset with him, because he asked for her hand, and half of my guests were confused, and spreading the news about my engaged bridesmaid... UGGG.

So moral of the story... ASK, VERY SPECIFICALLY to keep quiet... and DO NOT ASK AT A SOCIAL FUNCTION WHERE YOUR FUTURE FIANCEE WILL BE IN ATTENDANCE, or while the party is intoxicated.

In all seriousness, good luck, this is EXCITING, and I wish you the best! BEST WISHES!!!!!!!!
 

hawaiianorangetree

Ideal_Rock
Joined
Jan 17, 2009
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2,692
woops! i ended up here by mistake... but since i''m here.
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I completely agree with tlh, ask them and then ask them to KEEP QUIET. My fi asked my mum and then when i spoke to her on the phone a couple of days later she just assumed that i knew and told me what he said.
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We hadn''t picked a ring yet so it was kind of ok because i knew the ball was rolling but still.. that''s not how it works!

tlh.. i can''t believe that happened to you, twice!! getting your thunder stolen once is one thing but twice... and at your wedding?? Geez, how rude!
 
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