I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until now..

[josmar0623]

I'll try to make this short. My husband and I were engaged 6 years ago. I was heavily involved in the ring process and pretty much knew when/how the proposal was going to happen. We have been happily married but I regretted being part of the ring process because I felt like it took away from the element of surprise which was something I always wanted for a proposal. Whenever someone would ask the question on Pricescope about involving their gf/bf with the ring shopping, I'd adamantly say no and say it was one of my regrets with our proposal and wish I had just left it all to my husband. Until now... For about year now I've been going back and forth on changing out my setting. One reason I was so hesitant was because I could never find the perfect setting. I always found a setting I kind of liked but needed to tweak something about it. I finally came across a jeweler who understood everything I was trying to do so I went ahead with a custom setting. The closest I had seen to the real thing was a CAD because my husband ended up picking up the new ring and told me he wanted to give it to me. I was without it for about a month. This weekend we go to New York to celebrate a late Valentine's day and my husband's birthday. It was also our first trip without our kids. I knew our whole itinerary..including a horse and carriage ride through Central Park. What I didn't know was he had upgraded our ride to the proposal package. We stop at this one fountain, step off the carriage and there's this guy on guitar playing our song. I was thinking what a wonderful coincidence and turn around to tell my husband they're playing our song and when I turn around he's on one knee proposing. I was baawwlling, way more than the first proposal. I was totally caught off guard because my husband has never been into over the top romantic gestures and I usually find out about surprises.

I didn't even see the ring when he slipped it on. After the shock wore off and we were riding away in the carriage I finally got to see the ring. It was even better than I imagined. My diamond has found its forever home. I can't believe it's my same diamond because it looks so much better in the new setting.

I tried to take some pictures but I can't seem to capture the ring like I wanted so I posted a video too. **edited by moderator, no personal videos to protect everyone's privacy**

ETA that I am now in full support of the fact that you can be involved with the ring process and still pull off a surprise proposal.

 

[josmar0623]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Eeek..the pictures are huge. Excuse my dry hands and sideways pictures.

 

[foxinsox]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Your reset is lovely What a knockout! And how lovely is your husband for doing the big sweet re-proposal!

 

[december-fire]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Your new ring is beautiful!

I love your story (what a great DH!), I'm so glad you and your DH had time away without the kids, and I'm happy that you got to visit New York - isn't it a great city with wonderful, friendly people!

And, I'm really happy that you will no longer be recommending that the ring-wearer be excluded from the ring selection process!

Oh, and when it comes to photos of rings, the bigger the better!

 

[diamondseeker2006]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Beautiful new ring! Your hubby was so sweet to surprise you!

 

[Strawberry129]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Your ring is lovely!

And congrats on getting a 'dreamy' re-proposal.

 

[cmd2014]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Beautiful ring!

Personally, I'm so happy I was involved in ring shopping. All the things I would have picked for myself from a picture looked awful on me in person, and so the direction we went totally changed after that. What we did is I picked a style of ring that I liked (MRB solitaire, tapered cathedral setting with 4 prongs as a I am not particular to the Tiffany style setting, and in platinum as I do not suit yellow gold). We had a bunch of examples, any one of which I would have liked. I let him pick the stone and the final ring on his own schedule and had a surprise proposal and ring (within reason) at the end. He picked the one that had secretly been my favorite of the bunch, and with a stone that was in his budget (well, quite a bit less really as I vetoed the original budget saying that we would be better served saving that for a down payment on a house). I have always loved my ring. Sometimes I regret vetoing the original budget, but that's a size issue not a style one. 17 years later and I still get compliments on my ring because it suits me so well. If I had to do a redo, I'd do the same one, only bigger.

 

[Stone Hunter]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Your stone looks great in the new setting!

 

[Alybetter]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Your ring is gorgeous, I'm so happy for you. I love reading the stories behind these things.

I waffle back and forth between being a purist about the proposal process, and being more of an equalist. One part of me finds it weird when a woman expects a surprise, romantic proposal, but wants to pick the ring herself and have the man fully pay for it. Or man/man, woman/woman. Gender doesn't really apply, it's just the idea of having dominion over something that someone else has to pay for and then surprise you with.
The other part of me thinks if a person is going to have to wear something daily, perhaps for the duration of their lives, they should have a role in selecting it. Why should a person wear something they don't like? Does selecting the ring dissolve the sentiment?

I'm not sentimental, nor is my husband. He picked and bought my first ER, and it was a dog. I bought my second after careful considering. We are both fine with that.

 

[kathley]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Your ring is beautiful and looks lovely on as well!

 

[tyty333]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Congratulations on a beautiful new setting AND a proposal that surprised you!

 

[distracts]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Beautiful ring! I especially love the filigree in the gallery. And how amazing to have such a lovely story to go with it.

 

[ariel144]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Awwwe, your story gave me goose bumps...that was really special surprise he pulled off....way to go guy!

Love your ring too!

 

[poshmommy]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Love your new setting! Congrats on the surprise proposal you always wanted.

 

[josmar0623]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Thank you everyone! I feel like I'm cloud nine on an engagement high. I got my ring appraised the other day and was able to get proper pictures.

 

[pearaffair]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Stunning! And what a story!!

What was your setting like before?

 

[josmar0623]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

Thank you. This was my old setting. They were able to use the metal and diamonds from my old setting which I was happy about for sentimental reasons.

 

[the_mother_thing]

Re: I'd say no to participating in the ring shopping until n

What a lovely (new) ring, as well as such a sweet re-proposal from your hubby!